Disclaimer: I own nothing but a few DVDs.
A/N: A very big Thank You goes to my wonderful beta Arress. She does a really great job. Without her this story would be really awkward to read at times.
A/N 2: Also a great Thank You for all your reviews and to everyone who follows or clicked favorite. You are great.
Also a great Thank You for all guests who gave me feedback. I would have loved to answer you properly, but I can't.
Warnings: This chapter contains slight character bashing. So if you really love Kate, please skip this chapter. But bear in mind, this story isn't about bashing Kate but about Tony's confidence, so she will live. Gibbs and Tony are OOC. There will be slash in later chapters, so if this offends you, please don't read any further.
I really like feedback, so please tell me what you think. Thanks ;)
Chapter 9
When Kate thought about the day, she had to admit it was the worst day since the day she was held hostage in autopsy with Ducky and Gerald. The 'team bonding session' in the conference room had been bad enough, but when she went to Abby with lunch because she wanted to talk about everything and ask questions, she had gotten a really rude awakening.
Flashback
Kate went to get lunch in the local deli for herself and Abby; grabbed a CafPow! too, and went to the lab. If someone thought in the same way as herself, it had to be the forensic scientist. On the occasions they spoke about Tony, they seemed to be in complete agreement.
When she entered the lab, Abby's so-called music greeted her. Kate had learned early on to never turn it off. So, she went to Abby and laid a hand on her friend's shoulder.
"Abby, I brought lunch. Do you have time to eat and maybe talk?"
Abby had to gather her thoughts for a moment before she turned to great Kate. Why couldn't her friend be as nice to Tony as she was to her? Maybe it was time to help her see what Tony so desperately tried to hide.
"Hey, Kate. Sure, I have time. What did you bring me?" Abby really hoped Kate couldn't see the anger behind her overly friendly manner.
The rather subdued tone in Abby's voice made Kate look at her friend.
"Abby are you okay? Did something happen?"
"I don't know, Kate. Did something happen? And don't try to tell me you don't know what I mean, because I already know what happened today."
Those words made Kate contemplate escaping the lab as fast as she could. She didn't think she could take yet another speech about how great Tony really was. On the second thought, it made her furious. Just why couldn't she have five minutes of peace today? Everyone she worked with thought it a good idea to lecture her about her behavior and the way she saw a certain agent. Even McGee had the gall to tell her what she could or couldn't say.
"If you don't want me here, just tell me. I'd rather go to the bullpen before I have to listen to another person tell me about the great DiNozzo and how bad a person I am." With that she tried to get out of the lab. Just one thing stopped her and that was a very angry forensic scientist.
"Stop right here, missy. I have a question for you before you go. Did you listen to just one thing that was said earlier and did you think about just what was said? When you can answer that honestly, I'll show you the door personally." Abby couldn't wrap her mind around Kate's behavior. When had she become such a bitch? And more importantly, why on god's green earth did Kate treat Tony the way she did?
"I sure as hell can answer that. We get to hear just how great DiNozzo is; what degrees he's got, and that I have to change my thinking and behavior or I'm fired. And now I have a question for you, Abby. In what way is that fair? I am far better than Tony ever could be. Just because he has all those degrees, and I will check every one of them for authenticity, doesn't mean I'm not the better agent. He does nothing but play the clown all day, and when I call him on that he gets protection from everyone? So, he isn't even man enough to fight his own battles? Just why should I change anything? Tell me that, Abby!"
By the end of her speech, Kate was shouting at Abby. She just couldn't contain her anger any longer. After a moment she looked at Abby. She had shouted at her friend! From one second to the next Kate slumped down on the nearest chair, her whole body screaming defeat.
"I'm sorry, Abby. I didn't mean to shout at you. Just why does everybody have to get onto me today? Do I deserve that? Tell me, Abby, am I that bad of a person?"
Abby struggled with herself. On the one hand she was angry as hell with Kate; on the other hand she wanted to help her friend. Maybe if she helped Kate now, she could help Tony in the long run.
"Come on, Kate, let's get settled in my office and eat the lunch you brought. Then we can talk."
With that said, Abby grabbed Kate by the hand and dragged her towards her office. When they entered the room, she got Kate a chair.
"Sit down. Now let's eat." Abby handed Kate one sandwich and took the other one for herself and sat down at her desk.
When they finished the sandwiches, Abby spoke again.
"Now, let's talk. Tell me, Kate, why do you think today happened? And please really think about it. What could you have done to bring this on? And yes, you did something." When Kate didn't say anything for a few minutes, Abby tried to be patient and give Kate the time she needed to sort everything out.
"I don't really know what I could have done. I mean yesterday I teased Tony about his dating habits, but that couldn't be it, a few other agents laughed, too. Sure, Tony looked a little hurt, but usually he can take as good as he can give. Maybe I shouldn't bring up Voss again, but other than that nothing happened yesterday. And today there wasn't anything either. I came in, went to my desk, and started my work. I was even extra nice to Tony because of yesterday. Do you know something, Abby? Please tell me if you do. I'm at a loss here."
Abby looked at Kate. Could an investigator and profiler really be that dense? The two of them talked Friday night about Tony's reaction to Kate's teasing about Voss. Abby told Kate, just as Tony had, how much the agent hated himself for not saving Chris and instead kissing his murderer. Had Kate really forgotten what they had talked about so quickly?
"Are you really this dense, Kate? Don't you remember our talk Friday night? I told you just how much Tony is hurt even today about Chris' death, and you thought it was funny, even after you promised me you wouldn't do it, to bring the kiss up again? To answer your question from before: Yes, you deserved it. And if you want to keep your job, you should really think about yourself and why you treat Tony like dirt.
"I don't want to hear if he reminds you of someone. Or that it's not fair that he's the senior agent because you are way better. Because you are in no way better than Tony! Think about it, Kate. He's been Gibbs' SFA for almost two years and an agent for NCIS for almost three years. Before that he was a cop for almost six years, and four of those years he was a detective. How many years have you worked in law enforcement? If I recall correctly the last time we spoke about it, you said three and a half years, right?
"And what have you done to improve your education since you finished college? You had training sessions to be a profiler. Tony, on the contrary, finished two masters' degrees and has been learning languages for a living ever since he left college. So, Tony is more than five years your senior in law enforcement and continues to improve himself with everything new he learns.
"So, tell me again, Kate, why are you the better agent? … You can't. It's as simple as that."
When Kate said nothing, Abby went on. "I want you to leave now. When you want to keep your position on the MCRT and be my friend, you'll think about everything you've heard from Tony, Gibbs, and me. And when you've thought about all that, either resign or make amends. You don't have any other options." With that Abby left her own office and after a moment Kate went back to work, her mind full of everything Abby had said.
End Flashback
What Abby said had made Kate thinking, more than anything that both Tony and Gibbs had told her. When she came back from Abby's lab the bullpen had been empty. She didn't ask herself where her two colleagues were. On the contrary, she was happy to have a few minutes to herself to sort everything out.
When Gibbs and Tony had come back, Kate hadn't accomplished anything, but she had gotten herself together so she could work again. The entire time she and Tony had worked on their cold cases, they didn't speak to each other. When quitting time came around, Tony went to Balboa to speak with him about the lead he found for the cold case he had worked that day, and with a short 'Bye' he was gone. When Kate heard the agents talking, she could feel jealousy creep up on her. How could Tony have found a lead so soon when the only thing she had done today was read the case notes over and over again? Because she hadn't found a lead on her cold case, Gibbs made her work an extra hour. When even at six and without Tony around, she hadn't found a thing, he took pity on her and sent her home.
So now, here she was two hours later with her mind spinning around everything that had happened today. When she had come home and after she had changed clothes and brewed some tea that actually calmed her nerves, she went to the couch, settled back, and pondered whether she should call her sister or not. Ever since her sister went for a degree in psychology, she was Kate's first choice when she needed someone to talk with, to sort things out. But on the few occasions they spoke about her work at NCIS and the SFA, her sister wouldn't want to help her and would just say she had to overcome the prejudice she had about Tony. The last time they had talked, Kate had tried to argue with her sister that she didn't know Tony the way she did, and there wasn't any prejudice, just facts, but her sister wouldn't listen to her.
With that in mind, Kate decided against calling her sister and instead thought again about everything Abby had said to her. Kate just couldn't believe she had gotten under Tony's skin that much with anything she had said about the kiss, but when she recalled just what Abby had told her about his feelings and then thought about the hurt she could see in Tony's eyes every time she teased him about the incident, she admitted to herself for the first time, that maybe everything that had happened today was her fault.
When she thought about the last three weeks, and when she was honest with herself, she had to admit that she had felt really good to get one over on Tony. Before all that started it was Tony who got one over on her every time they started teasing each other. But when she was brutally honest with herself, it didn't hurt when Tony teased her. Sure, he poked her at just the right places to get a reaction out of her, but it really didn't hurt her. It just rubbed her the wrong way.
When she thought about all the teasing, one thing entered her mind that didn't before. To find all of her trigger points every time, he had to have very good people skills. Even Kate, a trained profiler, wasn't that good at reading people. Before the jealousy could creep up again, she thought about how Tony treated people.
With his friends and most of the agents, he played the clown. And to be honest, everyone from the janitors to the director seemed to like him. She had yet to find anyone in the agency who didn't. But on the few occasions she had watched Tony with witnesses or victims, she had to admit that he was completely professional and friendly. But what came to her mind every time she thought about Tony at work was his behavior with suspects. Just like with her, he got under their skin without any effort. Just about every second suspect ended up shouting everything they had done at him, because they were at their wits' end. The other half spilled everything and bragged about it, because they thought he couldn't do anything to them. Until today, it hadn't occurred to Kate that it was exactly that kind of behavior that got them everything they needed to close cases successfully.
After all the things she had thought about, she at last admitted to herself that maybe she really had underestimated Tony by taking him at face value. Maybe she should have really tried to get to know him. And maybe the fact that she had needed help to create a dossier about him should have had advised her to look at the man himself. That thought made up her mind. Beginning tomorrow she would try and get to know Tony. She would treat him with the respect a superior deserved. And she would look at everything with fresh eyes.
Happy with herself about her decision, she went to bed.
At the same time Tony found himself slumped on the couch in Gibbs' house with a bottle of his favorite brand of beer in hand, with the former marine sitting beside him in almost the same position. The steak Gibbs had made him had been perfect, as always, and now he had the feeling he could sleep for a week.
When they had returned to the Yard from lunch, Morrow had called Gibbs into MTAC, so he couldn't be there for Tony should something happen. So, just before Tony would have actually fallen asleep, Gibbs began to speak.
"So, tell me, Tony, how was the afternoon? Did anything happen while I was gone?"
When Tony recalled the afternoon, he was quite happy about it. Kate hadn't said a word the whole time, and he had found a lead for his cold case, which Balboa would hopefully close soon enough.
"You know Gibbs, after the morning we had, I would have thought the afternoon would be just as bad, but nothing happened. I found a lead Balboa will follow tomorrow and Kate was alright. I don't know what happened while we were gone for lunch, but she didn't say one word. Sure, she didn't even say goodbye, but that I can live with. How was MTAC?"
When Gibbs found nothing in Tony's eyes that would have shown him if the man was hiding anything, he spoke again.
"MTAC was a waste of time, as always. I know Kate went to Abby for lunch and didn't hear quite what she would have liked to hear. That would explain why she was so quiet. What did you find out about the case?"
"Well, there was a neighbor who wasn't properly interviewed the first time because he told the cop who started the investigation he wasn't in town at the time of the homicide. I could disprove that. What do you mean Kate didn't hear what she liked from Abby?" Tony was instantly fraught. What would Abby have told Kate for her to be so quiet?
Gibbs watched Tony the whole time he was talking. He did know that after everything that happened, Tony would question every move from everyone. And he had seen the change in Tony's body language instantly.
"Calm down, Tony. Abby told Kate the same things you told her earlier in the conference room. And I said it before, Abby will back you up. So, nothing to worry about for now! When Kate comes around and actually says something again, we'll see how it went in the lab. I could only talk to Abby for a minute because she had lots of evidence to work through, but she ordered me to tell her best friend ever to, and I quote, 'stay calm and stop worrying about everything'. So, do as she says and stop thinking about it."
When Tony didn't say anything and just smiled at him, he went on. "Do you want to crash here again? It wouldn't bother me, you know that." Gibbs had to quell the hope that started to rise in him. It would be too easy for him to get accustomed to Tony's presence in his house. And regardless of that, he still was disappointed when the man refused his offer.
"You know, Gibbs, maybe it's better I go home now. I don't want to keep you from your recovery time with your boat. And sooner or later I have to go back to my apartment anyway." Tony really wanted to stay, but he was afraid that if he used Gibbs too often as his personal psychologist, their friendship would suffer. He got up and slowly headed for the door, Gibbs in his wake.
On the porch he stopped again. When he turned to Gibbs to say goodbye, he almost came nose to nose with the man. He hastily took a step back. Gibbs had to smile as Tony actually had blushed slightly when he retreated, and he really thought it was a good look on him.
"Good night, Tony. See you tomorrow."
"Yeah, tomorrow. Good night, Gibbs." With that said, Tony got into his car and drove off.
For just a moment longer Gibbs stayed on the porch and looked at the stars. If he had believed in wishes, he would have known exactly what he would have wished for. But he didn't believe in such things, so he went back in and straight down to his basement for one or two hours of wood working before he headed to bed.
The whole time Tony was driving home, he thought about the smile Gibbs had shown when they had stood there on the porch. He just hoped Gibbs hadn't seen him blush. When he got home he took a quick shower and then went to bed. The day had been emotionally exhausting after all. The last thought before sleep claimed him, was again about a smiling Gibbs.
TBC
