Thanks again for reviews. I really hope I don't disappoint. A little bit more cutey stuff in this chapter. :)

"I hope you know I am going to kick your ass at this. I'm the champion bowler. My name's even on that wall." Percy pointed at a wall near the toilet area.

"I thought that was for eating their hottest chilli or something?" Gwaine punched him in the arm, but was the one who came off worse, holding his cracked knuckles in his other hand.

"It was. But that's beside the point. I'm a champion of bowling."

"What's your tactic, throw the damned ball overarm and hope it lands in the right lane. I bet you could crack the floor dropping a ball with those arms." Lance tried to fit his hands around Percy's biceps, but none of his fingers met at any point around the mass.

Arthur laughed out loud and nearly choked on his drink, Gwen had to hit him on the back to stop the violent barks emanating from his throat. The bowling alley was quiet, it was technically a school day but they had a free one and decided to use it as one of their 'get Merlin back on the road' days. It was a good chance for Merlin to get involved but not have too many people around him, the crash really had brought on a number of social anxiety issues.

"Teams or versus each other?" Elyan had taken seat at one of the computers to enter their names.

"Teams, then if we feel like it, we can do champions later." Leon answered.

"I've got Merlin." Gwaine shouted and clamped his hand on the boy in question's shoulder.

"Captain's first Gwaine."

"Who made you boss Elyan!? Ok. I'm Captain, and Gwen, Captain number 2."

"Fine." Elyan rolled his eyes and began to input the names.

Gwaine, Merlin, Lancelot and Leon.

Versus

Elyan, Gwen, Morgana, Percival and Arthur.

Gwaine reasoned that two girls made for 1 guy, so it was even, which of course ended in a half hour lecture from both girls about how sexist that was. It gave Arthur chance to talk to Merlin alone anyway.

"How you feeling? If it gets too much let me know and I'll take you home."

"I'm fine. Thanks, yeah I will. I hope you know you're going down though, I'm pretty good at bowling."

"You're good at wii bowling, this is a bit more complicated." He nudged the boys shoulder, leaning in for a kiss before remembering where they were and who they were with. Instead, he chose to squeeze Merlin's shoulder.

That afternoon was a blur. Arthur was the happiest he had been in so long and all memories of the crash were out of his mind. He watched as all of his friends fought and celebrated together. It really was a good job the alley was quiet or they would probably have got a number of complaints about just how loud they were being. Merlin, who had been getting spares the whole time, suddenly sat beside him with the biggest grin on his face, and of course this brought an even bigger grin to Arthur's face.

"I'm home alone tomorrow night, mum was bloody reluctant to go but it's a work thing so she has to. So I was wondering if you wanted to come over. You don't have to stay the night, just have tea and a bit of gaming or something. Or if there is some homework you're stuck on..." He was rambling, but whether it was out of excitement or nerves, Arthur couldn't tell.

"Of course. I'd love that. We can decide what to do tomorrow, see how you feel. But I'll pack for a night anyway, just in case. What time?"

Merlin was grinning too much and must have had something going through his mind as it was quite a while before he shook his head and replied "Oh, erm, I don't know. Six? You can fetch a pizza or something with you, or we can order when you get to mine. Either way I'm not bothered, oh look, it's my turn again."

Arthur watched as Merlin bounded to the ball rack, hefted one that must have been heavy as he'd seen Percy use it earlier, and near enough throw it down the lane. It moved in a brilliantly straight line right through the centre: Merlin's first strike. The entire group went berserk, shouting, cheering, screaming. Nearly everyone ran to Merlin, almost suffocated him in a hug and then continued to hug one another for no reason. Gwaine came over to Arthur who had stayed back a little, just watching and taking in the memory with tear filled eyes.

"I don't think I've ever seen him this way. You haven't drugged him have you?"

"Me? Why out of all of us would I drug him? I was thinking you must have."

"Nope. I especially love how you aren't even hiding your emotions, I can see those tears Arthur." Gwaine prodded Arthur in his ribs, laughing.

"I think if you were in my shoes Gwaine, you'd feel the same. I nearly killed him, and here he is, after having god knows how many breakdowns, ecstatic and full of life again. I just hope it lasts, I don't know how many more times I can see him get so low."

Gwaine put a comforting hand on Arthur's shoulder. "I know. We've run this whole race with you, but just on a slightly different track, with a bit of a different scenery. No-body is going to give up on him. Half of our exams are over, we've just got a few more to go and then we're free. Just two more months."

"You're right. Except for that analogy, the race one, that was utterly shit Gwaine."

"Eh, you know me, I'm crap with my turn. Look out bitches, the master is in the house."

Catching Merlin's eye, Arthur winked, smiled and then turned away to hide the tears that now escaped from his eyes. Quickly wiping them away, he turned back to find Merlin sat right beside him.

"Are you that jealous of my strike it made you cry? Come on, I thought you were tougher than that." He giggled. Oh god, he giggled. Arthur's stomach just turned to mush, butterflies, flips...jelly.

"I'm just happy for you. And do you have to giggle like that, you know it's my weakness."

"I could do with a pee, you need one too?"

"Why in the hell would you say that, what are we now, girls who go in pairs to take a pee?" Then it dawned on him. "Oh. Actually, I need another drink so I'll come with you. Hey, guys, we're doing toilet and drink duty, anyone want a refill?"

"Toilet duty? Is that where you pee for us?"

"Bloody hell Gwaine, you are so disgusting." Morgana shoved said disgusting male with some force, the group erupted in laughter. "I think I'll have another slushy please, you can't bowl without having at least one slush puppy."

It was true, you couldn't.

After getting the list of drinks, Merlin and Arthur walked over to the cafe section, whilst waiting for the drinks, they walked as normally as possible to the bathroom. Checking the stalls, making sure no-one was around, Arthur brought Merlin into a tight embrace.

"You know how sexy you look bowling? Yet also really cute too."

"Whatever. Oh bit of advice, you don't have to stick your arse out so far when you throw the ball y'know."

"Charming, why, does it put you off?" He smiled and moved some hair from Merlin's face.

"I never said I was complaining. But you may want to work out a bit down there, looks like all your fat goes to your arse." That was it, they were both giggling, Arthur knew Merlin was just trying to tease him, he did it all the time.

Their eyes caught and both pulled the other in for a kiss. Before long, their lips met, slowly at first, they pecked each others lips, then with a bit more vigor. Just as they were going for a little more intimacy, the door behind them burst open. Merlin pulled back, nearly falling over, and Arthur spun around to see Lance staring wide eyed at them.

"I didn't see anything." He turned to leave but Arthur stopped him before he could get out the door. Letting the door close, Arthur left his hand lightly on Lance's arm.

"We all know you did..." He paused, listening for any signs of Merlin having a panic attack, there was nothing. "Lance, out of all of my friends out there, you are probably the one both Merlin and I trust most. I know this is hard and I don't want to be the one to place such a weight on your shoulders, but I need you to keep this between us. Can you do that for us, for Merlin?"

"Of course I can. What goes on between people should stay between them until they themselves choose to let others know. It is not the right thing for a third person to spread some shit around. And can i just say, I'm happy for you."

"Thank you. It's appreciated. i hope everyone else understands like you do." Lance smiled and so did Arthur, but stopped when he remembered Merlin. Looking round, he could see Merlin shaking slightly and a much paler complex than a few seconds before. "Hey, it's ok. Don't worry." He put his arms around Merlin and kissed his cheek, it felt ever so slightly weird doing so in front of another person.

"Well, your drinks are ready, I need a pee so I'll see you back at the lane, I think it's nearly Arthur's turn."

Collecting the drinks, Arthur walked slowly and silently with Merlin back to the group who were patiently waiting for them to come back, sure enough, it was Arthur's turn. He put down the drinks and went up to bowl.

"Strike! Oh yeah!" Strange enough, it was the first time that game he'd got one, and he had brought his bum in just as Merlin had said. So maybe it had actually been a tip to improve his game. He was smiling to himself when Gwen came up beside him, definitely not smiling.

"What happened?"

"What do you mean? I got a strike."

"No, with Merlin." She nodded towards the seats and Arthur turned to see Merlin sat, shaking in Morgana's arms, with everyone surrounding him, looking worried.

"shit." Running to Merlin, he pushed through the group and bent down in front of his friend, cupping his face in his hands. "Hey, it's ok. Merlin come on. Guys, can you just give us some room please, just back up."

"I want to go home." Merlin's voice trembled, he looked up into Arthur's eyes and he could see something had really shook the boy up.

"Erm, yeah ok. I told you I would take you if you needed it. Come on then." Merlin shot straight up and walked off without saying a word to anyone, he was already half way to the front desk. "Well, sorry everyone, you'll have to finish up on your own. Just when I thought it was a good day."

"It has been, it's been great. But we've been at it nearly 3 hours. He's just probably tired." Morgana had pulled him into a hug, squeezing him for reassurance.

Arthur smiled a half smile, nodding to his friends he turned to meet Merlin at the desk, who had already taken his bowling shoes off and was currently replacing them with his own trainers. Knowing the delicate situation, Arthur didn't say anything. He explained to the receptionist that the rest of the group were still playing, only them two were leaving early.

Once they were back in the car, Arthur turned to look at Merlin. "I'm sorry. I should have taken us into somewhere more private before throwing myself on you. I was stupid and reckless."

"I'm not mad at you. I'm not mad at me, or Lance. I don't know what I feel, it's strange. But when I heard that door open, it was just like when that van smashed into us. It was the same sensation, just one massive blow and I went into panic mode. It brought back loads of memories that I thought I'd forgotten. Then I couldn't...I just..."

Arthur reached over and held Merlin's hand in his. "Please don't do this to yourself Merls, don't get yourself in that dark place again. It gets harder and harder each time to get you out of it."

"Please just take me home." Merlin pulled away from Arthur's hold and turned completely to face the window, there was no chance of talking to him now. Sighing, Arthur gave up and started the ignition, slowly, he pulled out of the car park and drove the rest of the way in complete silence, only occasionally glancing to Merlin to make sure he was ok.

Merlin had fallen asleep within 5 minutes, maybe Morgana had been right, maybe he was just tired; Arthur loved the way he looked when he was asleep, peaceful, dainty and innocent. Pulling up outside Merlin's house, he really didn't want to wake his friend up, but he had to, and so he slowly reached over and gently shook his shoulder.

"You're home."

"I'm so sorry Arthur." Without another word, he got out of the car and walked into his house. He didn't even look around to wave; this was when Arthur realised even the slightest actions could break his heart. Driving away, he couldn't help but burst into tears at the look in Merlin's eyes, it was one he was getting very used to seeing recently, defeat, he had retreated so far into himself, he was a lost soul.

Arthur went straight to his room and stayed there the whole night. He locked his door and wouldn't open it to anyone, not even Morgana. He knew it would worry her like mad, but it was too much, he was getting closer to the place Merlin went, the dark places.

You have nothing to be sorry for. We still on for tomorrow? I completely understand if not. Xxx

He sent the text at 5 O'clock- it was nearly midnight when he got one back.

See you at six.

That was it, nothing more, no kisses, no nothing. Arthur contemplated ringing him but he didn't want to scare Merlin, he just hoped Matthew had been right about sufferers not needing to be on suicide watch.