AN: It's still a bit early, but I hope you all have a good holiday and a happy New Year's! Saying it now, because I think the next time I post it will be 2018. Let's all give it our best next year! Now onto the fic related notes:
Sorry that the pacing is so abysmally slow. I would say it will pick up from here but... that would probably be a lie. This fic is more or less planned out on a day by day style outline. It's actually a little different from how I usually plot out my fics, but I figured I would give this style a try and see if it works for me. I didn't think it would take this many words to get through the first day alone, however... which is kind of typical of me, really. I'd like to think subsequent days won't take as long to get through but we'll find out.
I also feel like I have to say this because there seems to be some confusion in a couple of the reviews, but... Joan is the protagonist. I apologize if that wasn't apparent from the beginning as I wasn't trying to hide it. While Jaune is the deuteragonist, make no mistake; this is 100% an OC fic. The one who's going to receive the primary characterization is Joan and while Jaune will also grow and change along with his sister, his primary purpose is to serve more as a foil.
I get that might be a deal-breaker for some readers, but like I said at the beginning... I had a lot of reservations about starting this, choosing an OC as the main protagonist also being one of those reasons. Not just an OC, but an intentionally unlikable OC. I'm actually blown away by the number of reviewers who rather like Joan so far. Grateful that so many of you are willing to give her a chance, but surprised all the same, haha.
So once again, thank you to everyone who is reviewing and leaving constructive criticism. I know I'm kind of saying that a lot, but I'm really grateful a fic such as this has gotten as much attention as it has. With that, we move onto the final act of the first day.
Beta: Wildstraydog
Twin's Game
The First Day (Part VIII)
A Line We Should not Cross
Our first day at Beacon was finally over.
To say it had been an interesting one… would probably be a bit of an understatement. So many things had happened, I don't even feel like I could possibly remember it all. From the moment we had arrived we were greeted by a Silver-eyed warrior, fought a battle against the Fall Maiden and her team, and then had a ghost hunt dropped onto our laps. All of this and yet it felt like I was barely scratching the surface.
The number of times I had spoken to someone not my brother could be counted using one hand despite the fact that we met nearly a dozen new faces. This wasn't exactly anything new, as even back in our village I almost never interacted with another unless I absolutely had to. Jaune was always the one who had to do the socializing for the both of us. It was why he actually became somewhat decent at it, whereas I was a complete and utter mess. Practice really does make perfect.
All the practice in the world probably wouldn't have prepared us for how to react at the end of our most recent conversation.
You might have figured this out by now, but I don't exactly take it well when my brother starts intermingling with members of the opposite sex. Well, I finally learned today that Jaune takes it equally as poorly when one of them tries to interact with me.
Ruby had clung to me rather closely at one point in the day and the contact nearly sent me into cardiac arrest. Jaune had handled the situation as cool as an iceberg, coming up with an excuse and getting her off me. All without raising his voice or laying so much as a finger on her. Russel hadn't even touched me. He moved as if he meant to and that was all it took for the calm facade my brother had been putting on to show its cracks. You would have thought someone had tried to stab me with a knife, that's how venomous he became.
To be fair, Russel had tried stabbing me, but that had been during our match. I had no trouble or social anxiety while in the middle of a fight, but the moment I stepped outside the ring and it all came crashing back down. Being allowed to swing my sword gave me more options- didn't leave me feeling as powerless as I so often felt. In normal society, however, I couldn't just swing it at anyone that tried to talk to me. Stupid laws.
Jaune was the only one I could rely on to protect me.
A responsibility he took very seriously. We brought out the worst in one another, my brother and I. So long as he was around, I never had to get good at communicating with others. I could remain reclusive my whole life. Jaune knew this and in a way felt responsible. He wanted me to get better, but he also knew he had been the one who enabled me to slip this far. To make up for that he would protect me, no matter what it was.
"Oh man…" Even if he sometimes would regret it. "I really messed that up, didn't I?" My brother moaned into his hands, voice coming out muffled and barely understandable.
He and I were in our room now. As it just so happened, we were in the same building, on the same floor, and just down the hall from RWBY's and PRDS's rooms. Those two teams were right across from one another, ours just another four doors down. Despite this proximity, we hadn't come back together, Jaune and I excusing ourselves first before making a swift retreat from the rest of them.
Which was just fine with me.
"There's no point beating yourself up over it." I said, my voice the strongest it had been all day. Jaune sat on the edge of his bed, one of the only two in the room. I sat directly in front of my brother on the second bed. The two were lined up side by side with only a small walkway between them, headrests against the far wall. He had claimed the bed closer to the door by dropping his suitcase on it when we stopped by earlier, giving me the one closer to the window.
The room reminded me more of a hotel than a dorm. Perhaps slightly bigger than any room we have ever been able to afford staying in, but it was the most apt comparison I could make. It had also been quite obviously set up for us in advanced. There was two of everything in here. Between the beds, dressers, and desks alone, I couldn't imagine how you were supposed to fit enough for four people inside one of these rooms.
I considered asking Ruby to send me a picture of her team's room just to see how it could even be done. However, right now felt like it might be a bit of an awkward time to message her. You know, considering we ran away from them and all.
"That's easy for you to say." Jaune mumbled, still refusing to uncover his face."You're not the one who messed everything up." Okay, even if that was true, it wasn't like I made things any better by just silently glowering at everyone. My attitude is what led to the circumstances where he had to step up in the first place.
Telling him this was pointless. My brother was beyond the console of words now.
I silently stood up, unfastening the straps holding the orange sleeves on my arms. Once they were off, I then pulled the Pumpkin Pete's hoodie over my head before unceremoniously dumping the articles of clothing on top of him.
"Ah, what!?" Jaune knocked the clothes from him and they fell to his lap. Any further words he might have had died when he realized what they were.
"Wear them," I commanded, already walking around the side of the bed and standing in front of his suitcase. "Your smell is gone." It was impossible for me to calm down enough to sleep without his scent lingering around me. No doubt that was also the primary cause behind my most recent bout of insomnia. I kept his clothes too long again.
"Joan…" Jaune's voice had an edge of trepidation to it now. Not because I was making him wear his treasured hoodie. No, he was ecstatic to have that back. It was because he knew what was coming next.
I unzipped his suitcase, reaching into the bottom of it and finding the appropriate attire. "I'll be wearing this tonight."
From the depths of his bag, I pulled out a light blue onesie. It was cute in an atrocious kind of way, the feet at the bottom consisting of two bunny faces, complete with floppy ears and all. I pushed the fabric against my face and inhaled deeply, hoping to get his scent. It was there, but only barely. All our clothes had been freshly washed the day before our arrival. I frowned in dissatisfaction at it before finally dropping the words my brother was already anticipating, "You and I are sleeping in the same bed tonight."
"I don't…" Jaune paused and averted his eyes. He slowly started taking off his Beacon uniform, almost meticulous about it as if it would somehow delay the inevitable. "Maybe we shouldn't do that on our first night here?" An expected excuse.
No one would be in here to see us, but that wasn't the point he was trying to make. This was supposed to be the start of a new life for us. One where we could both become better. If we fell back into old habits right off the bat, what hope did we have for improving in the future? It was sound logic, but only if you ignored his earlier actions. Which I had no intention of doing.
"You took my pills from me." Instead I lauded something else over him. There was no point trying to reason with him, since he was in the right. So I sought to guilt him. "I haven't slept in days, Jaune…" I unclipped my bra, letting the pink fabric fall to the floor and expose my breasts. "Please…"
He didn't even turn to look at me, sliding the suit off and merely letting it crumple to the floor in front of him. "...Fine." It was with a sigh of resignation that he relented. He knew he could argue that the pills hadn't been doing anything for me. But he also knew my real intentions by even bringing them up. They were an excuse. Nothing more. Jaune and I were going to sleep in the same bed tonight, I had already made up my mind. I was just giving him a reason to accept it without making it an outright order.
The two of us continued changing. It was a far simpler process for me, the only things left to take off my stockings and shorts. They collapsed around my legs, leaving me in naught but those pink panties I knew my brother was fond of. He was in the middle of unbuttoning his shirt when the bright fabric must have caught his eye. My lips curled upwards and light blush tinted at my cheeks as I watched him try and fail not to glance at me.
It was just a quick double-take at first, before he went back to unbuttoning the rest of his shirt. As he slid the shirt off, he pretended to turn with the motion, eyes lingering on me a little longer this time. Followed quickly by another glance. Jaune sat rigid and still, no longer further undressing himself. Instead waging a silent mental war. It ended with a long, deep sigh of resignation, his bare shoulders rising and then falling.
He looked at me. Every part of me. His eyes scoured over every visible inch of my body, sometimes pausing to take a part of me more properly in. My breathing deepened, causing my breasts to rise and fall. The bottom of my bright pink underwear became a little darker. I lifted a hand, curling one of my blonde locks around my finger and bit at my lower lip. None of these things escaped his vision… and that pleased me so damn much.
It wasn't like Jaune and I had never seen one another like this before. This would just be the first time he had ever so blatantly given me attention like this while also having that hungry, burning desire buried in the back of his sapphire eyes. When he looked at me in the past, it had always been with the doting eyes of a big brother. He was aware of my feelings and while I always had an inkling his own existed, he never showed them.
Something about that interaction in the bath house changed that just now. Before, there had never been an urgency for us to acknowledge our feelings… our growing sexual desire. Finally being confronted by people our own age had triggered a reaction that made it impossible to ignore, even for him. Coming to Beacon was Jaune's idea to improve my condition, but it seemed to have only deteriorated his.
One little push was all I needed to give. I said it before, but Jaune would never outright deny me if I gave him a command. He would try to dissuade me against it and would most definitely voice his complaints, but if I told him right now to take me… to make me his; he would do it.
Like how his eyes wandered over me, I also observed him. His arms were thick and muscular, a direct result of our year spent fighting Grimm. I still remember when those arms had been like twigs, biceps flabby and without power. The skin of his chest used to be unscarred, but was now littered with all kinds of deep gouges and jagged cuts. Some of those injuries had been fatal, if not for his Semblance. My eyes lingered for the longest time on his pants, in particular where they seemed to be all the more restricting and uncomfortable.
All I had to do was walk over to him. I could leave the onesie at my feet and just go as I was. Even if he said something, I would just ignore him. I would drop to my knees and undo his belt. Slip off his pants and expose every part of him for me to claim. A shiver ran up my spine as I considered the possibility. It should be so easy for me to do this right now. So then…
Why was I hesitating?
This was what I had wanted ever since I realized the truth. Ever since our parents sat us down and told us about how strange our relationship was. Explained to us that it wasn't normal for a fifteen year old boy and girl to sleep in the same bed together, bathe together, and lovingly hold one another. It hadn't been strange for me until then, but after they told me… I knew what I wanted. I didn't just want to sleep in the same bed as him. I didn't just want to hold him. I wanted… to make love with him. I wanted him on the deepest, most intimate level you can ever want someone.
Most girls in this situation might lament about it. Why did I have to fall in love with my brother? Why do I want to be with my brother? That point of view was wrong. No, it was because he was my twin brother that I felt this way. No one else but him would do. I was happy when I found out the truth of my feelings. It was like the puzzle piece that was always missing had suddenly clicked into place.
Therefore, there was no reason I should want to hold back right now. Not when my brother was finally returning my gaze with the same heated, passionate desire that I had for the longest time given him. Our feelings weren't wrong, there was no way I could believe they were wrong. It was society that was messed up, not us.
If I so adamantly believed all this… then why? Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew. The logical part of my brain was pushed aside, dominated by primal, lust-filled hunger. But it was still there and it was shouting the answer in the tiniest, most miniscule voice imaginable. My burning passion tried to drown it out, but it was too late. I had already heard it.
Jaune didn't want this. Not really.
Maybe deep down he did. No, he definitely did. The look in his eyes right now wouldn't be there if he didn't at least feel it a little. It was just ordinarily so supressed that even I couldn't pick up on it in normal, everyday life. My brother always showed me all the love in the world, but it was just as that. An overprotective big brother, not a lover.
Unlike me, he was trying to fight against our nature. Not because it was wrong or immoral, but because of that guilt he carried around. It all cycled back to that. He wanted me to become better, but he couldn't stand to leave me. The contradiction was beautiful… but all too frustrating.
It wasn't hopeless, however. Not for me. This was the result after only the first day of being here at Beacon. The walls Jaune had spent the last three years building up finally showed their cracks and I realized just how fragile they had always been.
I could wait.
Pushing him into something now would work. He might even come to accept that it was inevitable. However, there would always be that doubt in his mind if I didn't first let him try to fight it. Only when he knew it was pointless, could I initiate this without regrets. I don't want my brother to be disappointed in himself, after all. I wanted him to think he had fought this for as long as he possibly could have.
Both of my hands fell to my sides and my breathing relaxed. There wasn't much I could do for my underwear, the base of them already wet and a sticky fluid trailing down the side of my leg. That was how excited I got with just him looking at me. I let all that go, burying the lust and instead focusing on other things.
Like how cold it was in this room. My bare nipples stood completely erect and my skinny arms started to quiver. It was in that moment Jaune seemed to snap out of it. He had been sitting so stock still that I don't even think he had been breathing. With a sudden gasp, his whole body deflated like a balloon and he glanced down at the space between us.
"You're going to catch a cold." He said. "Put on the onesie... and could you pass me my fleece bottoms?" His voice was muddled, dazed even. Like he just took a blow to the back of the head from a baseball bat. I don't even think he had fully come to grips what had just almost happened. How close we had been to finally crossing that line.
"Okay." I simply agreed with his request, first stepping into the onesie. Like all his clothes, it was a little too big for me. The legs and arms of the onesie bunched up in weird places just to properly fit over my petite body. There was a zipper on the front, but I only pulled it up halfway, leaving the inside of my breasts still exposed.
By the time I tossed my brother his bottoms, he had put on the Pumpkin Pete hoodie and orange sleeves. His pants had come off, leaving his legs in just pure white briefs. He pulled the blue fleece up in one swift motion and then started adjusting the pillows and pulling back the comforter.
I walked around the side, stopping behind him just as he finished. With a satisfied nod, he turned to me. "Come on, Joan." He chided after seeing the way I was wearing his onesie. "You gotta zip it up properly or you'll freeze in your sleep." He reached for the zipper positioned just below my breasts, no hesitance at all in his movements. Almost like that moment that just passed between us hadn't happened. I allowed him to completely zip me up, but as his hand pulled away, I caught it with both of mine.
He frowned at me, eyebrows knitting in concern. A part of him had no idea what I was about to do and I think that scared him. We had just come so close to stepping past that line once and for all, there was no way he could believe I was satisfied with the result. He would also be correct, but my satisfaction wasn't important right now.
I simply wanted to feel him. To be closer to him and know he was close to me.
My fingers traced the palm of his hand, feeling the rough calluses that hadn't previously been there even a year ago. Only once I was satisfied did I lift his hand, pressing it against my cheek. He didn't resist my pull at all, simply allowing me to do with his hand as I pleased. I could have used him to pleasure myself and I don't think he would have fought me.
What a thought that was too. How many times had I pictured that? How many times had I slid my tiny, short fingers into myself while pretending… wishing they were his long, calloused digits? Just imagining it caused a trickle to start back up and I had to fight the swelling emotions down unless I risk caving into them.
Instead the only thing I did was continue to hold his hand against my cheek, feeling the warmth of it against the otherwise cool air of the bedroom. His thumb began to gently stroke my face and he leaned forward, pressing his lips against my forehead. I made a soft hum, content for now with just this. In any other situation, this action may have been brotherly of him, but right now and after what almost just happened, I knew it was more than just that. We were more than that.
Not to him. Not yet. In his mind, we were still somehow south of the point of no return. The problem with the point of no return was that it was just an arbitrary line marked in the sand. And different people put it at different places. For most of society, my brother and I had gone past the point of redemption long ago. Longer than we were even aware there was a problem. I placed the mark right about where society saw fit to make me think there was a problem. And Jaune… I had a feeling he wouldn't see the line until true physical consummation.
Until then, he would continue to believe we weren't somehow already broken.
I leaned into him, burying my face into his hoodie and inhaling deeply. The unfamiliar soap and shampoo from the bath assaulted my nostrils, but more than that… there was also him. You read about it in those books all the time, where girls compare the smell of the guy they like to some kind of fruit or gum they're fond of. Not me. Jaune was just… it was Jaune. There was no smell in the world like him. Nothing could replicate the effect it had on me or I would have long since obtained it.
His other hand came around to rest against the small of my back, pulling me even closer to him. Meanwhile the other had moved to the top of my head, gently stroking my hair and running his fingers through my blonde locks.
"Brother…" I called out to him, voice now breathless and black tendrils beginning to crawl at my vision. Finally, sleep was coming to take me, but I fought it off a little bit longer yet. "I love you." He paused, as if my words somehow finally made him realize how intimate our current situation was. I could feel his hesitance through his body language, arms locking up and breathing grinding to a halt. It ended only a second later and he relaxed, leaning back onto the bed and bringing me with him.
He laid me down first, his motions gentle and meticulous as if he was handling a doll. Then his head hit the pillow next to me and he pulled the covers over us. I snuggled my face once again into his hoodie, the drowsiness now stronger than before. Vaguely, I felt Jaune's chin rest against the top of my head and he once again took me into his arms.
"I love you too, Joan…" He whispered heavily. "You're my precious sister." I could hear the internal struggle. How unsure he was of the meaning behind those words, despite the fact that he was the one who said them.
"You're my everything." I whispered back, the last thing I was able to do before my dreams took me away for the first time in days.
The First Day (End)
