Oh my gods, it has been exactly one year to this date that I last updated this story! And yes, I know, it's been longer than a year since I've updated some of my other WIP's. Don't worry, I haven't and I won't abandon any of my WIP's, it's just that work, family, and home keeps me INSANELY busy! I don't have the luxury of time to write as often as I'd like and it takes me a LONG time to develop, write, and polish each chapter.

So… please be patient with me! It really means a lot to me to have so many readers, followers, fans, and reviewers. I really love writing. It is one of my few guilty pleasures and I'd do it even if I had no audience… but having an appreciative audience makes it even more fulfilling and joyful.

I hope the wait was worth it. :D In order to get a chapter posted sooner rather than later, I decided to divide up what would have been chapter 9 into two chapters. So… Ch. 10 will be "Truths, Lies, & Omissions – Part 3", taking place during the school year. Then Ch. 11 will take place in the summer. Hmmm… will the two men finally admit their feelings for each other?! Then Ch. 12 will finish out the story. YES, there will be a happy ending. That's the plan for now…

Special thanks to the following reviewers whose kind words made me glow inside!: shera98, scgaraycochea, yaoilover226, sessha, Milyhpss, Azrael Jinsei, Kk, RaeRae14, Fenris Jin, pupzpride, superstararashi, GoddessonmyKnees, mres-severus-snape666, Auroras Jenkins, Tlcatlady, carrie fischer, midnightblack13, Marietta, lettervreter, Tstui1gos

HPSS HPSS HPSS

Ch. 9: Truths, Lies, & OmissionsPart 2

SUNDAY

MORNING

The next morning Harry woke up feeling well-rested and content. It wasn't until breakfast when his eyes drifted up to where the Potions Master sat at the Head Table, locking eyes and exchanging small smiles, that Harry remembered what he did the night before. He blushed hotly with shame and embarrassment. He couldn't believe he had done that. He picked at his eggs with his fork but knew he couldn't eat another bite. His stomach was rolling and knotting something awful. It's nothing, it means nothing. My body is just confused because I haven't had a girlfriend in a long time. A girl who is a good kisser. Yeah… that's all I need.

Harry's thoughts were interrupted a sudden burst of loud cheers and laughs beside him. He looked over to see his housemates passing around some animated cartoons that Dean had drawn.

"Nice one, Dean! Here, Harry, you gotta see this one of Trelawney!," Ron exclaimed, shoving a piece of parchment his way.

Harry took the parchment and chuckled at the caricature of the Divination professor. Rather than return to his earlier thoughts on what he did and what it might mean, he forced himself to focus on and participate in the conversations around him. He even managed a few bites of toast. He didn't look towards the Head Table again.

Homework was never a more welcome distraction. Harry decided to work on his essay for Charms first, as it was the easiest. Hermione had already finished her essays on Friday, while he and Ron hadn't even started. Hermione took them to the library and pulled out the books she deemed most helpful. Harry and Ron started taking notes while Hermione browsed the shelves again.

"How does she do it?," Ron asked quietly, once Hermione was out of earshot. "Not only did she already finish nearly all of her homework, she wrote eighteen inches for her essays when we only need twelve! And now she's looking for more books?!"

Harry laughed quietly. "It's a wonder she wasn't sorted in Ravenclaw!"

LATE MORNING

Severus sighed as he headed down the Headmaster's stairway back to the dungeons. He felt unsettled. He knew that the decisions made were the right ones, but he hated that they were necessary in the first place. He and the Headmaster had discussed the need for the Ministry of Magic, and the Wizarding World at large, to be informed about the return of this curse. Severus reluctantly gave his permission for his identity as a now-former-spy and the victim of the curse to be made known. They agreed that there was always the risk that someone else could reveal it, and it would be best if it were done on his terms. In line with that thought, they also agreed to have a short meeting with the staff before dinner. They also discussed the appropriate course of action to take regarding Draco. The Headmaster would indeed have a busy day: first, a conversation with Draco, to determine his guilt, set punishments, and offer support should he be willing to turn sides; second, a trip to the Ministry of Magic for an emergency appointment with the Minister; and finally, a short staff meeting.

Severus did not envy the Headmaster his job.

He hoped that the Daily Prophet would have a sensible writer assigned to the story. In the middle of his fretting he felt his stomach rumble. Nearly lunch-time, he realized. The thought made him smile. It really was rather foolish, dangerous even, but he simply couldn't help himself. He craved Harry's glances and smiles like the grass needs water and sun.

MIDDAY

The essay prompts for Potions and Transfiguration were challenging and Ron was rather chatty, so Harry's mind didn't have a chance to wander off. By lunch-time, Harry had finished all three of his essays and read two chapters for the coming week's classes. He was famished and mentally exhausted.

"I'm so tired of doing school-work," Ron complained as they made their way to the Great Hall. "And I'm still have one more essay to finish up."

"That's what you get for skiving off Friday and Saturday," Hermione chastised delicately.

"After a week of classes I needed a break!," Ron exclaimed.

Harry smiled and shook his head as his two friends continued to banter.

Roast beef, potatoes, several other side dishes, and, much to Ron's delight, Yorkshire pudding covered the tables of the Great Hall and soon filled their plates.

At first Harry's mind was preoccupied by his hearty meal; it was much needed after hours of doing schoolwork on so little breakfast. Then, having forgotten that he had been determined to not look at Snape, he looked over at the Head Table. Their eyes locked right away. Immediately he felt his face flush and he looked at away. He wondered if it showed, his smile and blush. He hated that he reacted so. He felt eyes on him. He looked up from his plate and saw Hermione looking at him curiously.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Harry shrugged and shook his head. "It's nothing."

She smiled softly. "Any time you need to talk, you know I'm here for you."

Harry smiled back. "I know."

Just as he was about to take another bite of roast, he thought he heard Snape's name.

"See?! There it is again!"

"Bloody hell, Snape is smiling! He never smiles!"

"I saw him smile yesterday. Creepy, ain't it?"

"If Snape's in a good mood, it can't be good."

"Reckon he's planning an awful lesson for us tomorrow?"

"Last night he caught me and Fay in the Astronomy Tower. He didn't take off points or give us detention. He just reminded us that curfew was in half an hour."

"Blimely! Maybe he's in a good mood because he got himself a girlfriend!"

"Not bloody likely!"

"The git could use a good shag."

"But who would want to shag him?!"

The obnoxious laughter was painful to Harry's ears. He forced himself to finish his plate.

"Treacle tart, Harry?"

Harry looked up at Ron. The expressions on Ron and Hermione's faces and the way that their eyes flickered to their housemates and back to him made Harry feel, at least in that moment, understood and supported.

"Yeah. I think I'll have a slice," he replied.

The sweetness of the pudding made the world seem like a nicer place.

LATER, IN THE GRYFINDOR COMMON ROOM

"That really bothered you, didn't it?," Hermione asked Harry, after casting Muffliato.

Harry shrugged. After a moment he nodded. "Yeah, it really did."

"Harry, please don't take this the wrong way, but, I still don't get it. So he's a member of the Order, and putting himself at risk to spy for us, but he's still a git. Don't tell me you've forgotten how he's treated you all these years, how he treats all students, especially those who aren't Slytherin."

Harry sighed heavily. "You weren't there. It's almost like Professor Snape and Severus are two different people. I mean, he's not, but, it's like "Professor Snape" is an act, a persona, and "Severus" is who he really is."

He trailed off and looked up. Both Ron and Hermione looked at in incredulously, eyebrows drawn up as high as they would go. "Severus?", they asked simultaneously.

"Er, yeah?," Harry felt uncomfortable. "He, uh, when he had me come over for tea, to, er, thank him for saving him, he knew I'd be nervous and he wanted me to be comfortable. He wanted… He wanted to talk to me man-to-man… instead of, er, teacher-to-student. So… he called me Harry and he asked me to call him Severus."

Harry took a deep breath. Ron and Hermione still stared at him as though in shock.

"And it was nice, just like I told you. I mean, yeah, I was nervous… but it was nice. I felt like I got a glimpse of the real man, the real man behind the professorial robes and broody scowl." Harry grinned with a quiet laugh. "Severus is actually quite different than he appears to be." He looked down and picked at his fingernails. "I… I don't want to betray his trust. I learned a lot of really personal things about him. But I can tell you with certainty that he… is sweet, vulnerable, gentle, kind, and funny – Merlin, he's funny. He and my mum were best friends, actually. And… as soon as the school year is over, I think he and I will be friends…," he trailed off, momentarily lost in thought as he imagined the two of them spending time together in the summer.

"I'm not off my trolley!," he promised firmly as he looked up. Hermione had a pensive expression on her face while Ron shook his head while a series of emotions played on his face.

"I believe you, Harry," Hermione finally said. She smiled. "I've always thought he wasn't treated with enough respect, especially after learning what he's done for our side, and for you particularly. It doesn't surprise me that he's a 'different person' in private and with people he's closest. It makes a lot of sense actually."

"Ron…?," Harry prompted cautiously.

"I don't understand. Whatever could make you think that he's sweet? Gentle? Snape wouldn't know sweet if it bit him on his big nose. Next I suppose you'll say he's romantic and sexy!"

"Ron!," Hermione exclaimed.

Harry bit his lip and looked down.

"I'll have you know, Ron, that Professor Snape is considered quite sexy by some of us girls – those who like the dark, mysterious, broody type… He's not my type, but I can understand why he would be to… some…" Hermione trailed off.

Harry looked up at Hermione in surprise. She smiled softly.

Ron grunted.

"Look, if you don't believe me now, Ron, that's fine. But perhaps this summer you could join us, both of you actually. The four of us could get dinner and visit over drinks… Then you'll see what he's really like, as a person, when he can just be himself with friends."

Ron's face relaxed. Then he gave Harry a careful look. "Are you sure you haven't been hexed, mate?"

Harry laughed. "Positive."

Ron nodded slowly. "I'll trust you, Harry. It's hard to believe, but I'll trust you." He sighed heavily. "You think he'd fancy a game of chess with me after dinner?"

Harry grinned. "I would be willing to bet on it."

LATER

Ron and Hermione were still looking over Ron's Charms essay, and Harry knew that it would take a while, so he stacked up the library books they had borrowed throughout the week and offered to take them to the library.

Just as Harry had nearly reached Madam Pince's desk someone bumped into him, causing his arms to lose their hold on the books. They crashed to the floor loudly, earning a glare from Pince. Harry winced.

"Oi, Harry, I didn't see you there." Harry turned to see Luna Lovegood standing with an open book in her hands and an odd pair of pink tinted glasses on her face.

"Sorry," Harry whispered to Madam Pince. He knelt down to pick them up. Luna bent over and picked up one of the books.

"You know, if you're interested in protective charms, there's a better one than this. I recommend Castile's book. You could borrow my copy, if you like." She picked up a second book.

"Oh, that's brilliant, Luna, thanks," he replied as they piled the books onto Pince's desk.

"Would you like to go to the Lake with me?"

Harry looked at Luna curiously, as if seeing her for the first time. A bit odd, but she's pretty… and sweet… and a good person… "Sure," he replied.

As they walked through the castle halls and down the grounds toward the lake, Harry listened attentively while Luna prattled on about secret messages in books that could be read with special glasses if one were sitting outside, provided of course that there was adequate sun and either a lake, river, or other body of water nearby. Harry thought it was quite strange, but it was amusing rather than annoying, and it made him smile.

When Luna declared that she found just the right spot, she sat down with the book in her lap and Harry stretched out on his back beside her. Eyes half-closed he stared into the sparse clouds up above and listened to the soft sound of pages turning. The ground beneath him was comfortable, and he was tired enough from doing school-work that he very well could take an afternoon nap right here in this spot. Only he felt… unsettled. He stared into the clouds, blinking slowly, thoughts drifting as lazily as the clouds. Then he remembered what he had done the night before. And he wondered how he could walk into the Potions classroom and face his teacher again.

"Not enough sun today, I suppose."

Harry turned his head to look at Luna. She smiled and shrugged her shoulders. She still had the glasses on. Harry smiled. The glasses really were ridiculous-looking. But somehow on Luna, it was just… Luna.

"There's nothing wrong with feeling confused. It's our mind's way of protecting us."

Harry blinked. "What?"

"Sometimes we think we are confused when really we are just not ready."

"Ready for what?" he asked.

"The truth. We already know it but we are not ready to accept it."

Harry looked away. He swallowed and tried to push away the discomfort that Luna's words gave him. At first he felt indignant. She didn't know what he thought or felt. She knew nothing about his life. Her words meant nothing. But then a tiny voice piped up, suggesting that perhaps Luna's words had worth after all.

For the rest of the afternoon and evening a strange, nameless feeling nagged at him. He racked his brain for what he could possibly be confused about, for what truth he wasn't willing to accept. The latest Transfiguration lesson? His feelings about Luna? Every time Snape came up in his mind, he immediately brushed it off. No, he wasn't in love with Snape, he wasn't attracted to Snape, there was a reasonable explanation for his wanking off to thoughts of Snape, a reasonable explanation for his face flushing, and he was absolutely certain of this. Absolutely.

Despite his determination to not look at Snape during dinner, he did take a few glances up toward the Head Table. Only about half the time he managed to look away quickly enough to avoid locking eyes with the man.

It was only a matter of time before someone (other than Hermione) noticed.

Once when he exchanged a quick smile with Snape he felt a jab at his ribs.

"Got your eyes on a bird?"

Harry turned to see a grinning Seamus, eyebrows waggling. "Sorry, what?"

"A bird, a skirt… Gonna chat her up? It's been a long time since you've been with Ginny. 'bout time for you to find someone new!"

Harry shrugged uncomfortably. "I dunno. Maybe." He quickly shoved a bite of chicken in his mouth.

Face flushing and heart pounding, Harry wondered what was wrong with him and how he was going to make it through the rest of the school year without going mad.

HPSS HPSS HPSS

Well… what do you think? ! If you want to put a special warm glow in my heart, make me feel appreciated and all warm and fuzzy inside, please share with me what you enjoy about my story or this chapter in particular. How does it make you feel? What is your favorite scene, piece of dialogue, or other story aspect?

Consider this…. Imagine spending over 12 hours preparing a three-course meal. There's a table full of people gobbling up all the food, and there's not a single compliment spoken to you, to each other, or muttered under the breath. They just eat it up and then say: I want seconds / I want more / When will you cook for us again? How would you feel? Even if you know it's good, and even though you see everyone cleaning up their plate so clearly they are enjoying it, it's REALLY NICE to hear actual complimentary words, not just requests for more. Makes you feel appreciated?

There's a difference between knowing/inferring that your readers enjoyed your story and feeling appreciated by your readers.