Loss

JJ looked at Will, stunned, her smile falling from her face. The doctor gently moved her out of the way and said "I need to get in here, Agent Jareau."

She backed up, her hand reaching out behind her to grab hold of anything that would keep her upright, her knees were turning to jelly and she felt herself falling. "He doesn't know me..." she thought.

She had almost fallen when she felt an arm around her waist, lifting her up. She clung to Spencer's strong arm as he held her, then he eased her down into the nearest chair. Spencer took her chin in his fingers and tilted her tear-streaked face up to his own. "Listen to me Jennifer", he said, arching his brows and making her look him in the eye, "it's temporary. He's going to remember - look, look at me... this is temporary!"

JJ gulped back tears and nodded, taking his hand off her chin and squeezing it hard. Spencer held onto her hand but stepped to the side so they could both see what was happening. The doctor was examining Will gently but quickly, trying to see if there were any external clues for his symptoms, when Will started seizing. The nurses moved to hold him down as his body jerked up and off the bed, repeatedly. JJ screamed "WILL!" and jumped to his bedside as the medical team tried to keep him from doing any further damage to himself. His seizure went on for what felt like forever, their efforts to hold him down less than half-effective, when he suddenly went limp. Feeling for a pulse the doctor shouted "He's coding! Get the crash-cart!" as one nurse fled the room to obey.

Jennifer backed up again as the doctor performed CPR, then the nurse was back with the cart and everything became slow-motion. JJ watched as they applied the defibrillator paddles to Will's chest, seeing them move as if under water, the doctor's repeated warning of "clear!" sounding like a whisper under the roaring in her ears.

They worked on him for nearly forty minutes, but in the end it proved futile. Detective William LaMontagne Jr. passed away, having never again knowingly seen the woman he had loved beyond all reason.

JJ lay across his silent body, sobbing, as Spencer stood behind her, tears running unashamedly down his face. He felt he should give them some privacy, so he hobbled into the hallway, closing the door behind him. He pulled out his phone, still crying, and called each of the team, his quiet voice softly breaking the tragic news to them all.


Emily spent the next few days with JJ, helping her go through the motions of daily life, seeing after Henry, and assisting with all the arrangements for Will's funeral. It was to be a celebratory affair, if such a thing existed, complete with a New Orleans jazz band. JJ walked through it all, accepting condolences from all of Will's cop friends and loved ones, feeling flattened and completely void of emotion. The team was there, of course, and Spence. She just couldn't bring herself to care. About anything. Her mother had come and taken Henry for the foreseeable future, and she was relieved about that much, at least.

She excused herself early and went to lie down, even the act of crawling onto her bed seemed enormous, insurmountable. Spencer watched her go, then followed her in, catching Emily's eye to let her know he'd look after her. He crutched into her room, his heart aching with how small she looked, all in black, crumpled into a ball on her bed. Her and Will's bed.

He leaned down to remove her shoes, and got a blanket from the reading chair in the corner. He spread the blanket over her and squeezed her shoulder, noticing her unseeing eyes were wide open. "Can I get you anything?" He whispered. She didn't answer so he went to sit in the chair, staying there silently sharing her grief, until late into the night.