Charlie: Okay, sorry about the delay…but then it is SAT week and my brain was devoted to studying… and well, now that the SATs are over and my brain has properly imploded, time for the next chapter! Yes, the moment you've all been waiting for, the grand opening of the K/K Beauty Salon! Yay! Anyways, I don't own FE and anything else I might actually use in this fic. (Since I don't know what I might put…I make this up as I go).


K/K Beauty Salon Part 1:

Hair Gone Crazy

Inside the inn, Charlie had pulled out numerous plates of fruit, cereal, bread and breakfast meats. He cleared out a long row of tables and put the plates out in a little buffet and let the people present run loose at the food. Almost savagely, the members of Eliwood's Elite along with most of the people who had fought against Kitty's bandits attacked the buffet like a pack of hyenas.

Within minutes, everyone was seated at a table eating and chatting, except for Charlie, and the buffet was completely emptying. Sighing, the innkeeper refilled all the plates, got his food, and went to the table Kiyoko, Alan, and Samantha were sitting at. The four were going to go to school today to inform everyone of the little plot. They knew George wasn't going to be happy about having his lesson plan disturbed, but then, nobody ever paid much attention anyway. One table over from theirs sat Brian, Kate, Dias and the three sisters. On the other side of Charlie's table sat Kevin, Erimus, Jessica, Pent and Louise. The tables were grouped in a little triangle so they could have one last mini-briefing before the day got started.

"Okay, you three will go to school." Jessica was saying pointing at Alan, Samantha and Charlie. "Tell everyone the plan. I already wrote the headmistress a letter. Meanwhile, Kiyoko, you and Kate will meet Brian at the temple. Get everything set up, I'll send Vaida in about an hour."

"Okay." Kiyoko said. "I'm sure Glenn won't kill me for ditching today."

"Nah…" Dias said between bites. "I'll write an excuse for you."

"Thanks." Kiyoko said nodding at her PE teacher.

"Hey wait…" Charlie suddenly said. "I need someone to watch the inn."

"I'll do it." Lulu volunteered. "I'll watch it until everyone goes over for lunch. Fae can take care of herself until then."

"Okay, thanks." Charlie nodded.

"Okay anyways." Jessica continued. "Pent, Louise, and I will keep everyone else busy. I'm sure Canas and Dorcas are already snooping around. So if all goes well, it should be quite the interesting day."

"Indeed." Brian agreed. "Now come on, we've no time to waste, hurry up and finish so we can go."

The conspirators nodded and quickly put away the rest of their breakfast. As soon as the plates were in the sink, Brian, Charlie, Kiyoko, Alan, Samantha and Fae all set out towards the school and temple area. Lulu took Charlie's usual place behind the bar and proceeded to wash dishes and sneaking shots. Sonia crossed over to the store to open up. Dias followed her and kissed her goodbye before he too went towards the school. Fae went over to the restaurant to get things ready for lunch. Kevin and Erimus lingered around the inn for a while longer before they too went out of the inn to their respective jobs. When all the Silent Springs people left, Jessica nodded to Pent and Louise and the trio split, meandering their way among the crowd of people and eavesdropping on various conversations.

Canas and Lucius were about to be killed by a butter knife wielding Erk when Pent arrived at their table. He quickly restrained a red faced Erk and calmed the young man down.

"What happened?" Pent asked once Erk put down the butter knife. "Erk doesn't usually jump people like that."

"Canas suggested a few…shall we say activities that Erk and Rebecca might had been doing last night." Lucius said snickering a bit. "I think we pushed it a little too much."

"Oh really…" Pent said. "So Erk, tell me, DID anything happen?"

"ARGH!" Erk screamed in frustration. "NO, I didn't DO anything TO Rebecca, or WITH Rebecca."

"I know that!" Pent said. "I'm just wondering if you feel anything for the girl."

"What!" Erk said, blushing a little. "No I don't."

"Sure you don't" Canas snickered. "That's why you almost slept with her."

"Dude…" Erk said. "I don't like her that way okay? I don't like any of the girls that way."

"So are you saying you're gay?" Pent asked laughing.

"NO!" Erk yelled.

Pent, Lucius and Canas were laughing like fools now. They attracted the attention of the table next to them. Seated there were the three Pegasus Sisters and Lyn. They looked over to see what the commotion was about.

"What's so funny?" Lyn asked stretching her neck over.

"Erk just came out of the closet." Canas snickered

"What!" The girls cried. "REALLY!"

"For the last time…" Erk growled dangerously. "I'm not gay!"

"Prove it!" Lucius said laughing.

"Fine…I WILL!" Erk said. He got up and stormed away. The two magic users along with the four girls followed Erk's path. Pent saw which table Erk was headed towards and smiled. Everything was going according to plan.

Rath, Rebecca and Wil were all eating cereal and discussing Sonia's archery skills when Louise joined their table.

"Hiya Louise." Wil greeted. "What took ya?"

"Jessica wanted something from me." Louise said calmly.

"Ahh…" Wil said. He went back to his food. "So, did you see Sonia today?"

"Yes." Louise said. "She's quite good isn't she?"

"I've never seen anyone shoot multiple arrows with that accuracy." Rebecca commented.

"Well, I'd expected it from her considering she was military trained." Louise said.

"How do you know that?" Rath asked.

"She told me." Louise said. "In fact, she, her sisters, Charlie, Kiyoko, Brian and Kate were all military trained. It was part of a special program."

"Wow…" Wil said. "Well, that explains how they could hold off so many bandits."

"Well, not including the fact that the bandits were retarded." Rebecca said bluntly.

"True." Louise said. "But that was still some good fighting."

Everyone at the archery table nodded and they went back to their food.

"Umm…" Rebecca finally broke the silence. "Lady Louise."

"Yes dear?" Louise asked looking up.

"Can you teach me…to be a lady?" Rebecca asked.

Wil and Rath nearly choked.

"Why on Earth would you want me to?" Louise asked. "You're already a fine lady."

"Well…" Rebecca said. "It's just that there's someone in this army I fancy…and well, he's from a well off family. I just don't want to make a bad impression."

"Is it Erk?" Wil blurted.

Rebecca blushed. "N-no! Nothing like that."

"Sure it isn't" Rath said snickering a little. Suddenly, he noticed a purple haired figure heading towards them. "And speak of the devil…"

"It's Erk." Wil said mildly surprised.

Louise followed Wil and Rath's eyes to where Erk was heading towards their table. He had a fiery determination in his eyes that Louise had never seen the young sage have. She wondered what he could be up to.

When Erk got to the table, Rebecca looked away slightly and blushed. As badly as she wanted to deny it, she did like Erk, a lot, but there was no way she could face him now, especially after what had happened in the previous morning.

"Hello Erk." Louise said pleasantly. "Take a seat?"

"I'm fine…" Erk said. "I was just wondering if I could talk to Rebecca for a moment?"

"Umm… sure…" Rebecca squeaked. She let Erk lead her away from the table for a moment. "What's up?" She asked in a small voice.

"Well…" Erk said. "I was wondering if…you'd like…to umm… hang out this morning? We could go over to the store and see the scenery and stuff?"

"Well…I don't have anything else to do so sure…" Rebecca said.

"Cool…it's a date." Erk said happily and he walked away back towards his own table. Rebecca blushed like a tomato and walked back to her table.

"What happened?" Wil asked. "You look like you have a fever."

"It's nothing." Rebecca said. "I'm just a little hot that's all."

Rath and Wil looked at each other then out the window. It the ground outside was still covered in snow. They looked back at each other and shrugged.

"Okay…whatever you say." Wil muttered. "Oh by the way, we're going over to see the mountainside later, wanna come?"

"Umm, it's okay." Rebecca said. "I have other plans."

"Okay, whatever you say." Wil shrugged and he went back to his cereal.

Louise smiled. She knew full well what other arrangements Rebecca had.

Three tables over Marcus and Merlinus were eating together. They looked around at all the people, most of them nearly half their age. It was quite depressing.

"Look at al the young people." Marcus said. "I truly feel that I'm getting up their in age."

"You're not even forty Sir Marcus." Merlinus said. "You've got quite a ways to go."

"No, really." Marcus said. "I'm getting old. Why the other day, young Eliwood fell asleep in one of my old war stories. The youth today, no respect at all."

"Sir Marcus, your war stories ARE boring." Merlinus said.

"We need to teach them young folk a lesson." Marcus continued ignoring the merchant.

"Marcus." Merlinus said firmly. "You're NOT that old."

"I know!" Marcus exclaimed. "I'll form the first ever Eliwood's Elite's Thirty and Up Club. Only people over thirty may join!"

"That's only you, me, Oswin, Dorcas and Hawkeye Sir." Merlinus said. "That's not enough members for a club."

"That's why our club is going to be called the 'Exclusive Thirty and Up Club.'" Marcus said.

"Whatever you say Sir." Merlinus sighed, giving up.

"That's the spirit!" Marcus said. "Now, I want you to go collect members!"

"I'm eating my oatmeal Sir." Merlinus said.

"Ahh, you'll have plenty of time to eat when you're dead." Marcus said. "Now go get me them members!"

"Yes sir…" Merlinus sighed. He reluctantly trudged off to find all the members of the army who was over thirty years of age. In his mind, he was sure Marcus had lost his mind.

A few tables over, Jessica had joined Eliwood and Hector with a bowl of fruit.

"Hello, may I join you?" The tactician asked.

"Sure." Eliwood said pulling up a chair.

"What's up Jess?" Hector asked between bites.

"Nothing much." Jessica said. "We can't have our guided tours yet because the tour guide is still in school."

"Who is it?" Hector asked. "Is it that Alan kid?"

"Actually, yes." Jessica said. "How did you know?"

"He was an archer." Hector said. "Archers are usually found in the woods."

"You speak of them like they were animals." Eliwood said to his friend.

"Eh, it's true though." Hector shrugged.

"Eh…" Jessica said. "They hunt, that's what archers do, anyways…"

Jessica stopped. "Oh no…"

"What?" The two lords asked.

"Sain…" Jessica said pointing at the young cavalier. He had been sitting with his partner, Kent, along with Lowen, Isadora, and all the warriors. Now he was making a beeline towards Florina's table.

"Oh man…" Hector said. "This is going to be funny."

"Or ugly." Jessica said. "Lyn's gonna take his head off."

Lyn saw Sain before he even got half way to her table. She immediately became defensive.

"Florina… hide." Lyn said.

Florina and her sisters looked at Lyn. "Why?" They asked.

"Sain…" Lyn snarled. Fiora and Farina nodded and shielded Florina, even though the young girl made pitiful attempts to tell her sisters that she was fine. Seeing that Florina was properly protected. Lyn rolled up her sleeves and waited for Sain.

As Sain approached Florina's table, he was already calculation his odds of survival, and it did not look good to him. Lyn was already up and glaring while Fiora and Farina meat shielded their sister. Sain gulped. He wasn't going to come out of this without a scratch.

"What are you doing here?" Lyn growled when Sain got there.

"I wanted to talk to Florina." Sain said calmly.

"Why?" Lyn asked.

"Well, I was kinda rough on her last night, so I wanted to make it up to her." Sain explained.

"Well…" Lyn said. "I'm afraid I can't let you do that. You might take advantage of her, and I won't let you do that."

"Lady Lyndis, I've always had the utmost respect for you…but please, I want to apologize to Florina for snapping at her." Sain said.

"No." Lyn said stubbornly. "Go away."

"Lyn…" Sain begain. He couldn't finish. Lyn jumped him and began to strangle him. Immediately, the room burst into action as almost everyone gathered around to watch Lyn kill Sain. From one table over, the mages forgot about Erk's date with Rebecca and began to take bets on how fast Sain would suffocate, while on the other side, Heath was frantically fighting through the crowd to try to restrain Lyn.

Soon, Heath made his way into the circle and pried Lyn off Sain.

"Lyn!" Heath yelled. "NO! Don't kill him!"

"Just one bite…" Lyn said derangedly. "I want his blood! He shall not touch Florina!"

"He's NOT touching Florina!" Heath yelled. In the crowd, people forgot about Sain and began to bet on the battle between Heath and Lyn.

"He will!" Lyn said. "Let me go…unless." Lyn stopped struggling and turned towards Heath. "YOU'RE WITH HIM!" She screamed and jumped Heath. The Wyvern Lord, already near dead from holding Lyn back, was now helpless to save his life. He choked and watched his entire life flash before his eyes.

It took a while for the crowd to realize that if Lyn didn't stop, Heath would die. They all jumped into action. The person closest to Lyn, Rath, immediately jumped out and pried Lyn off her second victim while Wil and Louise attended to Heath's injury. At the same time, Lulu ran over with a blunt lance. She snuck up behind Rath and Lyn and smashed it over both their heads, effectively knocking both of them out.

"Sweet Elimine!" Lulu exclaimed. "Is the girl rabid?"

"No…" Heath panted. "She's just fanatical about defending her friends."

"Well, somebody take her upstairs and keep her from destroying the town." Lulu said disgustedly. "And the rest of you, back off, nothing to see her." Lulu dispersed the crowd and everyone drifted back to their tables. Wil and Louise stayed to take care of Rath while Heath picked up Lyn's limp body and carried her to their room.

As the crowd was dispersing, Jessica silently drifted over to Vaida.

"Yo Vaida." Jessica said.

"Yes?" Vaida asked.

"I need you to do me a favor." Jessica said.

"Okay…" Vaida said. "What is it?"

"Can you go to the temple?" Jessica asked. "They have something they need someone to help out with."

"Okay…" Vaida said. "But why me?"

"You're just lucky." Jessica said. "Heh, I just picked straws."

"Ahh…" Vaida said. "Well, let me just finish here and I'll be on my way."

"Excellent." Jessica said. With that, she drifted back to where Hector and Eliwood were. On the way there, she saw Guy bring Ninian a bowl a fruit.

'Hmm…' Jessica thought, the gears in her mind turning.

Meanwhile, the conspirators were finally arriving at the school and temple area. Kiyoko was lagging a bit because her arms were full.

"Gee…" Charlie said. "How much stuff did you loot?"

"Three necklaces, a pair of pants, two wallets and fourteen gems." Kiyoko squealed.

Charlie and Alan sighed. Only Kiyoko could find that much loot searching dead bodies. At the school, Charlie, Samantha, Alan and Dias bid farewell to Brian, and the K/K girls as they entered the school. The rest of the children were already there, herded in by the teaching staff during the raid. Glenn looked relieved to see Dias and his three students unharmed.

"You guys okay?" Glenn asked.

"Yeah." Dias said. "The bandits weren't that good, and Kiyoko blew them up with a holy hand grenade."

"Ahh." Glenn said. "Well as long as you're safe. So where's Kiyoko?"

"Ummm… about that." Dias said. He began to tell Glenn the plots with Charlie and Alan clarifying here and there. By the end of the speech, Glenn was near speechless.

"You're asking me to stall an entire day's worth of class to help out that ragtag group of fighters?" Glenn asked. "No way."

"It's actually Lord Hector and Lord Eliwood's army." Charlie corrected. "It's just not that big."

Glenn flinched. "Well why didn't you say so? Come, we must make preparations!"

Glenn led the four arrivals into the school where they proceeded to inform the entire school of the new plans. The students were happy to help while George wasn't exactly thrilled about canceling class, but since Glenn was the new acting headmaster, he had no choice.

"Okay, so Aminec, go get Delphi, and then we'll elaborate on the traps." Glenn said.

"Okay…" Aminec said. "But Delphi won't like it."

"I'll give her extra cookies." Glenn said. "Just get her."

The janitor shrugged and headed out towards her house where she housed her prized Pegasus. Meanwhile the others began to lay down the foundation of how they were going to trap Florina and Sain in the backyard. Suddenly, there came a cry from the backyard. Everyone looked up.

"What was that?" Glenn asked.

"Maybe one of the bandits got through." Dias said. "Lets go check it out."

Charlie nodded and drew his sword while the rest of the teachers followed, keeping the children from getting too close. The entire group slowly moved into the backyard where the cry was coming from. As they walked into the snow, they saw a lone figure lying in the snow. The person was breathing but not moving. Charlie quickly sheathed his sword and ran over, followed by Glenn holding a healing stave.

"He…he's just a young boy…" Charlie said when he saw the figure's face.

Glenn nodded and began to send healing energy into the boy while Charlie carried him inside. The other teachers and students parted to let the two men carrying the boy in. Once inside, Glenn increased the energy flowing into the boy while Charlie wrapped him in blankets. Dias and George cooked up some hot chocolate for the boy when he woke up and the other students just stood around, helping in any way they could.

Alan took this chance to sneak over to Hitomi.

"Hey…" Alan whispered.

"Yeah?" Hitomi replied. She didn't usually talk to the boys much.

"Can you go to the temple now? Kiyoko needs your help." Alan lied.

"Really? What kind of help?" Hitomi asked.

"Just go…" Alan said. "She didn't tell me what kind, but she just said she needed you."

"Okay…" Hitomi said. "I'll go now."

She snuck out, wonder why Kiyoko needed her. Meanwhile, the boy was beginning to stir.

"He's awake." Glenn announced.

Dias quickly brought the hot chocolate. The boy opened his eyes, sat up and looked around. His eyes slowly came into focus and he looked around confused.

"Where…am I?" He asked.

"Take it easy boy." Dias said handing him some hot chocolate. "We found you outside."

"Oh…" The boy said. "Where's Kitty?"

The room fell silent. Glenn looked at Charlie and Dias.

"She's gone." Charlie said. "Now no sudden movements or I'll kill you." Charlie pulled out his sword.

"Don't worry…" The boy said. "I lost my magic tome down the cliff."

Charlie nodded, but his sword stayed out. "So, what's your name."

"My name?" The boy said. "Why do you need to know?"

"Well, I need to know what to call you." Charlie said.

"Well…" The boy said sitting up straighter. "They call me the great Sword of the Seals!" He said proudly.

"Uhh…" Charlie said. "I'm going to call you Bob, unless you want to give me a real name."

"Salrin, my name is." The boy said.

"Talk straight." Charlie said. "Anyways, why are you here?"

"To kill all, I will." Salrin said.

"Speak badly, you do." Charlie mocked. "Do that again and I'll kill you."

"Gee…fine…" Salrin said. "I was ordered to scale the cliff and burn the temple."

"Why?" Charlie asked.

"No idea." Salrin said. "Can I go now?"

"No…" Charlie said. "We chased Kitty away…so unless you want to face the Silent Springs wilderness, you're stuck here."

"Ahh man…" Salrin said. "Where will I live?"

"I dunno." Charlie said.

"He could live with me!" A student spoke out. Charlie looked back to see who it was. He found Max and Louisa standing there with determination in their eyes. "He's a mage like us, so we could take care of him."

"It's too dangerous." Charlie said.

"But come on!" Louisa argued. "If he stays with Max, then we could be the 'Mage-y Triplets!' You guys would finally lose your unfair edge."

"This isn't the time for old rivalries!" Charlie said.

"You're just worried." Max said. "That we would beat you."

"Okay, screw it, I hope he kills you two." Charlie said throwing up his arms.

"YAY!" Max cheered. "Welcome to the club Salrin!"

"Thanks…" Salrin muttered. He drank his chocolate as the rest of the teachers and students dissipated to plan for their little event later this morning.

Across the street, Brian was showing Kiyoko and Kate a huge row of barrels.

"This is the hair growth potion, this is the coloring agent, that's the hair spray, and this is the scar remover, this is the moisturizer, and this here is the beauty cream." Brian listed off. "Instructions are on the barrels. I've set up basically all the K/K equipment in the main alter, so you guys can work there."

"Yay!" Kiyoko squealed. "Thanks Brian!"

"No problem." Brian said. "Now I gotta go help Sonia out in the store."

"Okay!" Kate said. "Thanks again."

Brian bid the two girls farewell and walked out. Kiyoko and Kate began to set up. They knew both Vaida and Hitomi had freakishly short hair so they prepared that first.

"It says here to use a table spoon." Kiyoko said reading the label. "What's a table spoon?"

"A spoon the size of a table I guess." Kate said. "Use a tub, that should be big enough."

"Okay!" Kiyoko said. She lugged two wooden tubs out and placed them behind the two salon chairs Brian set up in the alter.

Next were the beauty cream and the scar remover for Vaida. Kiyoko and Kate prepared a quart of each to use on her. Soon, everything was ready and the two girls waited for their costumers.

Soon, Hitomi arrived followed shortly by Vaida. Both looked around confused, wondering what was so important that they had to come down here for. Kate decided to jump them.

"HELLO!" Kate said. "AND WELCOME TO THE K/K BEAUTY SALON!"

"WHAT!" Vaida screeched. "I thought this was the temple."

"Why it is!" Kate said. "But it's doubling as the K/K Beauty Salon. Now you look like you need a makeover! Kiyoko! Get her strapped up!"

"But I-" Vaida began.

"Oh come now!" Kate said as Kiyoko dragged Vaida over to one of the chairs and strapped her in. "We have a full makeover program that will make you feel prettier than even the Queen of Bern!"

"Bu- I-" Vaida tried again.

She was cut off as Kiyoko covered her face and skin with beauty cream and scar remover while dipping her head into the tub-full of hair growth agent.

Meanwhile, Hitomi had put one and one together and realized that Alan had tricked her. She was about to leave when Kate grabbed her.

"Come now! Don't be shy!" Kate said enthusiastically. "We have all the furnishings to make you look absolutely FANTASTIC!"

She dragged poor Hitomi over to one of the chairs and tied her down. Kiyoko applied the beauty cream while dipping Hitomi's head into her tub of hair growth.

Kate and Kiyoko watched their victims lie helplessly in their makeovers. The two girls smiled and high fived. Soon, it will be done.

Charlie was showing Salrin around the backyard when he suddenly heard a tremble. He looked for the source and to his horror, the church seemed to be moving. The rest of the students as well as the teachers heard it too as when Charlie ran from the temple, so did they. Upon closer inspection, the church wasn't the one that was moving, it was in fact, tons and tons of golden and black hair streaming out the windows, the bell tower, the doors, everywhere.

"WHAT THE HELL!" Charlie screamed as he drew his sword. He chopped a lock of hair from the mass, only to have it grow back in seconds.

"Oh man…this is some mean hair." Alan said.

"Don't stand there, START CUTTING!" Charlie screamed while hacking fanatically through the door.

"All I have are my bow and arrows! What am I going to do? Shoot my way through?" Alan asked.

"Well, go get help!" Charlie said as he disappeared into the temple and more hair grew to cover his path.

Alan turned towards Dias.

"I'm going to get Brian, you guys keep the kids out."

Dias nodded as he and the other teachers began to herd the children away from the temple. Alan began to make his mad dash towards the main town. When he arrived at the inn, he was breathless and began making wild gestures at Brian.

"Whoa!" Brian said. "Slow down, breathe…"

Alan calmed down slightly.

"Now…tell me, what's wrong?" Brian asked.

"Hair…growing…out of…temple."

"What? I don't follow you." Brian said.

"There's hair growing out of the temple…LOTS of hair." Alan said.

"Oh dear…" Brian said. "Lets go…I only hope that my assumption is wrong, otherwise the temple may be destroyed."

The two men then quickly strode out and ran towards the temple. Unfortunately, one man heard their conversation, and he wasn't happy.

Matthew quickly downed his cereal, grabbed his toast and ran out after Brian and Alan.

"Where are you going?" Jaffar called out after him.

"Samantha's in trouble!" Matthew called back. "I'm going to save her!"

"…Man…he doesn't give up." Jaffar sighed and he resumed eating his oatmeal. Legault looked at him and decided not to ask. It was all beyond him.

When Brian got to the temple, Glenn and Fureal had managed to heard all the children back to the school. George and Dias were at the windows hacking hair as fast as it grew.

"Oh man…" Brian said. "This is bad."

"Why?" Alan asked.

"Because Kate and Kiyoko overdosed on the hair growth potion…now the hair will keep growing unless the source of the hair is cut off from the potion." Brian explained.

"Charlie hacked his way in." Alan said.

"We can only hope he's alright." Brian said.

Inside, Charlie found himself surrounded by hair. He hacked left and right, keeping himself from being suffocated.

"KIYOKO! KATE!" He yelled. "WHERE ARE YOU!"

"OVER HERE!" Kiyoko yelled from somewhere near the alter. Charlie began his low forward path towards the alter. It seems that every time he cut a lock of hair off, twice the amount grows back, but still, he moved forward.

"HOW DID THIS HAPPEN!" Charlie called.

"WE DON'T KNOW!" Kate screamed back. "ONE MINUTE WE WERE FINE, THEN SUDDENLY THEIR HAIR REACTED!"

"HOW MUCH POTION DID YOU USE!" Charlie asked.

"A TABLESPOON!" Kiyoko said. "ONLY WE COULDN'T FIND A SPOON THE SIZE OF A TABLE SO WE USED A TUB!"

"…" Charlie was speechless. "A TABLESPOON ISN'T THE SIZE OF A TABLE KIYO! IT'S JUST YOUR REGULAR SOUP SPOON, OR AROUND THERE."

"OH…" Kate said. "THEN WHY DO THEY CALL IT A TABLE SPOON!"

"YOU PUT IT ON A TABLE!" Charlie called back. "I DON'T KNOW, JUST KEEP YELLING, I'LL FIND YOU!"

Kate and Kiyoko screeched their hearts out as Charlie hacked his way forward. Outside, Brian was listening to the shouting inside. He smacked his forehead at Kate and Kiyoko's misconception.

"Dear St. Elimine do I need to spell it out for them…" He sighed.

"Trust me…" Alan said. "I still don't know how you guys stand living in the same villa with those two."

"You get used to it." Brian said. "CHARLIE! MAKE SURE YOU PULL THE HAIR OUT OF THE TUBS!"

"OKAY!" came the reply.

Inside, Charlie finally hacked his way to the alter. He began making smaller cuts so he wouldn't accidentally kill anyone. Soon, he found Kate, who had her Lightning tome out and was frying anything that got too close.

"Kate!" Charlie said. "I found you."

"About time!" Kate said. "I think the hair is starting to wear out…the growth's slowed down."

"Thank St. Elimine." Charlie said.

"CHARLIE!" Kiyoko's voice suddenly called out. "HELP!"

"Shoot…" Charlie said. "Come on Kate, stick close."

The two quickly made their way around the alter and found Kiyoko.

"Chawee!" Kiyoko cried when they found her with her daggers chopping at hair. She sheathed her daggers and glomped the young swordsman.

"I'm happy to see you too." Charlie said hugging his friend. "Now come on, we gotta get their hair outta that potion."

"Okay…" Kiyoko said. "But make sure you leave it waist length."

"Okay…" Charlie said.

The trio fought their way to the center of the alter. They found Vaida and Hitomi, pale with fright.

"What's happening!" Vaida asked.

"Bad stuff…" Charlie said. "Come on…lets get you out of here."

Charlie, Kate and Kiyoko worked together to free Vaida and Hitomi. Charlie and Kate cut their restraints while Kiyoko trimmed their hair to perfection. Once the two beauty salon victims were out, Charlie began hacking again, this time, a pathway out. Since the source of the hair was out of the potion, the hair no longer grew back.

"Come on!" Charlie said. "Lets get outta here!"

Everybody agreed as they all helped to hack a way out.

Outside the Salon, a small crowd was gathered. It seemed that more than just Matthew heard Alan's cry for help. So far, Jessica, Hector, Eliwood, Legault and Jaffar joined Matthew in standing helplessly outside the temple, praying for the people inside.

"Is Samantha okay?"

"Samantha's fine." Dias said half-heartedly. "She's in the schoolyard."

"Oh…" Matthew said relieved. Jaffar rolled his eyes and watched as Matthew snuck into the school, still holding that now mangled piece of toast.

Suddenly, the mass of hair covering the door collapsed and a keen blade took its place. Moments later, Charlie emerged supporting a quite pale Kiyoko. Brian quickly ran up to help. After Kiyoko and Charlie, Kate stumbled out and almost fell before Brian caught her and pulled her away. Next, Hitomi came out. All the Silent Springs people froze. Hitomi now had waist length raven hair. Her skin was smoother with a creamy color from the makeover. Her eyes sparkled and her lips were full and red.

"…What happened…" Glenn asked as he stared at his student that he no longer recognized.

"A miracle…" Dias said "Hitomi finally looks like a lady."

Hitomi was still in shock. She stumbled down the stairs before Glenn helped support her. He then led her over to where Charlie and Brian were tending to Kate and Kiyoko.

The next person to walk out shocked the members of Eliwood's Elite at the temple to their bones. She was a blonde haired beauty, with smooth creamy skin, long, luscious blonde hair that went to her thighs, and sparkling eyes.

"V…Vaida!" Hector stammered. As he and the rest of the people in the army rushed forward.

"Hu…huh?" the girl replied. "Wher…where am I?"

"You're in Silent Springs." Jessica said. "Is that you Vaida?"

Vaida seemed to snap into reality. Her eyes focused. "Of course I am." She snapped. "Why? …and what's this?" Vaida grabbed a fistful of hair. "…Oh…Dear…Elimine! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

With that Vaida fainted. Hector lunged to catch her before her head hit the ground.

"If Hitomi was a miracle." Jessica muttered. "Then this is Divine Intervention."

As the victims of the madly growing hair were helped into the school for treatment, everyone cast nervous glances towards Kate and Kiyoko, wondering what kind of magic did they use.

As the group entered the school, Brian asked George for Samantha.

"I don't know where she is." George said.

"What?" Brian asked. "Why?"

"Well, a sandy haired youth came in." George began.

"Matthew…" Jessica perked. "What did he do?"

"Nothing…he asked for Samantha…I directed him to her… and I haven't seen either of them."

"…You are an idiot." Glenn said. "FIND THEM!"

The entire school was searched for a sign of Matthew and Samantha. Soon, George's young daughter Eliza found something.

"Daddy… "Eliza said approaching George. "I found Sammy…she's in the closet with…"

"With who honey?" George asked.

"…A boy." Eliza whispered as if it was a dirty word.

Brian heard. He stormed to the closet in question and threw open the door. Inside, he found Samantha snuggled in Matthew's arms munching on a piece of toast. Matthew stroked her hair with his free hand while the two laughed and chatted. It took them a while to notice the fuming priest at the door.

"Oh…Brian!" Samantha said.

"Father!" Matthew cried jumping up. "It's not what you think it is!"

Their outburst drew everyone else's attention as the entire school tried to crowd around the closet.

"Kiyoko…" Brian said in a dangerously silent voice.

"Yes?" Kiyoko squeaked. She had never seen Brian so angry.

"Arrest this man…" Brian growled. "For attempted rape of my sister…"

The atmosphere tensed as Kiyoko slowly walked towards Matthew, daggers drawn.

"Sorry…" She said. "Hands up…"

"I protest this." Jessica said. "You're violating his rights!"

"I'm sorry…" Kiyoko said. "But…in Silent Springs… rapist and murders lose their Miranda Rights. Matthew…I am placing you under arrest."

"See you in court." Brian growled. "Lock him up Kiyoko."

Kiyoko gulped. There was only one prison cell in Silent Springs… and it lies in the basement of the town library…one of the most lethal places in Silent Springs.

"Yes…" She said softly. Not even the infamous Kiyoko is fearless of the Silent Springs Library.


Charlie: …I'M SORRY! My Matthew-bashing side cropped up again. Anyways, yeah, that's the big day three surprise… Matthew gets tried. Well, I hope this chapter didn't suck too badly. (My brain imploded this morning, so I can't think straight). K/K Beauty Salon is apparently a miracle place. And yes, Samantha and Brian are siblings. And yes people, the title isn't lying…this is Part 1 of 4 in the K/K Beauty Salon legacy.

Reviewer's Corner n.n

Aramin RVN: Heh, thanks. I didn't know I was going to use Monty Python until I got there, so I forgot to put in the disclaimer, so this time, I just did a universal one. I hope you'll continue to like this!

Aminec: I dunno how Kiyoko does it…but she just does. Besides, you get paid to do stuff! Samantha's demon is actually based off Stewie Griffin of Family Guy. As for the hand grenade…we didn't expect any rabbits at 50,000 feet in the mountains. Heh, and looks like I still missed another typo.

Inferno-Hero: XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD;;;; Yes, Monty Python is VERY funny, you should go see it. I think I saw the soundboard. Yeah, his taking is funny n.n. Anyways, you got your triplet.

Aeros Fujita: Yes, I concur, Monty Python is great! (If you have the DVD, watch it in Japanese with weird subtitles, it's hilarious). Kitty is just Kitty…she wanted to be in…so I decided to use her name for bandit.

DragonLady626: Hehe, Hand Grenade ish cool! Samantha'll be fine…her demon is still a baby so he can't control his emotions that well. If you're looking for Supports, go to FE planet, they have some. As for Isadora and Harken….you don't get Harken if you get Karel, so Harken's not in here.

Min the Noodle: Heh, Rebecca has longer hair so Erk would probably pull hers back. Jaffar and Lowen send their thanks and implore you to kill me. Please don't listen to them.

Lao Who Mai: Yes, Monty Python was great; I loved that movie. (We watched it in English, oh man, I never liked that class more.) Anyways, K/K Beauty Salon worked their miracle. It was creepy…I actually envisioned Vaida hot…even though she still acted like an ass.

Nightmare3: Monty Python does indeed rule. -nod-. I swear…the Durandal is like bigger than Eliwood…how DOES he carry that thing? As for the inappropriate touching… I'll elaborate later on. (Many of my character's inappropriate escapades shall crop up during trial). A good raid must be done properly, soo… hehe n.n we give them lesson. Anyways, glad you like this, update your fic soon, and I'm sure Fiora will come around to your charms.

LaFia: Heh, wow, good to see that had an impact. It'll get better between those couples soon.

SwordmasterKevin: Heh, thanks. I'm glad you like Lyn, as well as my Pen name n.n;;;

Macross-Green: Heh, glad you like this. I know that the past few chapters have been focused on the OCs…but then that's what happens when you hafta introduce over twenty six of them. I'll slowly shift back to focusing on the FE people. It'll be a mix, the OCs won't go away, and they're always there to make life interesting, and sometimes miserable, for the FE people. And Guy…I hope you caught what's gonna happen to Guy. (Ish evil)

Samantha: Dead flesh is not good for hair -nod-. Hehe, I helped Rath along by whacking him with a lance! (Well Lulu did…but she's my real life cousin). Hehe, you're not the only one to connect my nickname with Pokemon, I'm used to it by now n.n. Well, I love ya too! (Not in that way). Hope you won't want to strangle me for the trial thingy…

Mierin Eronaile: (Side note, I'm getting better at spelling your penname). Yes, BartrexKarla is canon, but then…I'm not a canon person. (Obviously… since I'm doing the most whacky pairings ever.) Heh, the bandits will have some encore appearances…mostly involving getting their asses handed to them. The Holy Hand Grenade…man, I love Monty Python, I think I watched it too much to be able to do that part with some degree of accuracy.

KevinC: Heh, I was laughing because I pictured Kitty doing that stuff, man…it created some whacky images. The Holy Hand Grenade seems to be a source of many pleasures (Along with being my favorite part in Monty Python). 'tis great! Anyways, well, you can see what K/K does… quite…amazing really… making Vaida pretty is a near impossible feat. Oh and notice in the title it's "K/K part one" …who knows what could happen next. I hope you like Matt as company!

Blob: Monty Python is the equivalence to instant humor. I love that movie. Heh, K/K part one is up. Hope you liked it.

Draknal: Heh, I was watching Monty Python, and well, it came to mind. The bandits were just morons who didn't know what they were doing. It's always fun to fight them. And I wrote the book on bandit fighting! Of course I'll know more about being a bandit n.n.

Random Person: Yes, but it does make it entertaining to see moronic bandits. Yes, Stewie is from Family Guy, one of the best series known to mankind. (Now you know how I get ideas…TV and movies). Glenn will use his spells more or less for really weird and interesting stuff, there's not much fighting in this fic. He'll be up front during the next bandit raid.

RWT: Body parts, yep… body parts. The demon is indeed a guy, but not only a guy, but the greatest of the evil geniuses! STEWIE GRIFFIN! MUAHAHAHAHA! Hehe, I like the look up and whistle gag, works in many situations.

Kiyoko-Chan: I'm sorry…I know you can count to 3 n.n. I can too! 1, 4, 2389, 2384719, 128937214, 23e4, 1238973, 121, 3. n.n wee! Hehe, everyone knows 2 and 2 makes 22 Kiyo, come on! O.o and how did your friends see "Kiyoko" and "Pregnant?" -ish brain fried-. Kitty is cool. Most of the Silent Springs people, except for Lulu, uses swords, so hehe, we cheated n.n. Lulu's just badass enough to kick their buts regardless. Hehe, anyways, don't stay up too late at night, eat your veggies and pocky and pie, and take care of ye-self! -fusses over details about her health-.

That…was long…VERY long…