AN: I can't say how sorry I am for the late upload. I have exams so I've been revising and I still have lots of coursework to do…

I was going to wait until I had completely finished this chapter until I uploaded it but it would have taken much longer to update.

In consequence this is a short chapter, but you get to here Alice's story without further delay. Seeing as this chapter is much shorter than usual the next one will be uploaded within the week seeing as it is already in the works + it should also be longer than this one.

Also… OVER 50 reviews now! Thank you to everyone who took the time to write one, however I would love some more seeing as I'm getting so many hits.

Anyway, hope this is okay for you guys!


Chapter 9 – You're Not Alone

APOV

I kept my eyes on the box haunting my vision, never once did my gaze shift from the dirty brown cardboard that's contents was partially unknown to me.

"Carlisle gave me that box a week after I moved in with the Cullen's," I told Jasper, still keeping my gaze on the scruffy writing, "Although I've never opened it, I don't think I want to know what's inside."

And I honestly didn't. What use was it looking back at things I could never experience again? Whatever the box held was the old me, Mary Alice Brandon. That name was so unfamiliar to me; I refused to believe it was ever mine. I was Alice Cullen, daughter of Esme and Carlisle. People may think it to be selfish, but in all honesty I was scared shitless. Not wanting to know my parents was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make, and every day I contemplate whether it was the right one.

"Alice?" Jasper asked, taking hold of my face between his sturdy hands.

"I just don't think I could take it, you see Jasper the only thing I can remember is the last two years and I'm afraid that if I open that box a ton of bad memories will come flooding back."

"Alice, I don't understand." Jasper said looking into my eyes.

"My parents died in a plane crash, I was on that very plane as well, but wasn't so fortunate, if things turned out how they were supposed to I would be with them now, along with all of the other 187 passengers." Jasper eyes widened hearing my confession, I guess now he finally realised that I was once in a similar situation to him…

"Alice…"

"Wait," I held up a finger to silence him so I could carry on. "The doctors told me I was heading to a small clinic in Biloxi when the accident happened; apparently my parents had made an appointment with a doctor regarding my future residence at an asylum. Obviously I didn't know what that place was at the time, but I began to get curious. They would ask me random questions; questions that I had no clue how to answer. I was beginning to think I was insane. Eventually I found out, nurses would whisper in my room whilst they believed me to be sleeping. 'Anyone looking like that must have something wrong with her; it's a pity her parents didn't just send her off when they had a chance, now look what happened.' I knew they meant it was my fault that they were on the plane to begin with, but I realized they were there because they loved me. Carlisle knew them once in college and it had always been their dream to have a family with a beautiful little girl. He didn't see them again after that, but heard my mother had given birth and that they treasured me more than anything, but I couldn't give them what they wanted, I wasn't the perfect child they had wished for and therefore they would have to send me away.

"For months I remained in the dreaded small, white room, that constantly smelt of disinfectants and soap; it drove me crazy, but I had to stay, my injuries were intense and they were trying all they could to try and jolt my memory. They would show me old pictures; leave the television on in my room to help me learn what was going on in the outside world but nothing meant anything to me. Every night I would wake up in a sweat, visions of the crash would burn through my mind but I forced myself to stay quiet, who knows what they would think if the supposedly mad girl screamed every night? I guess that's when I partially stopped sleeping."

He nodded is head, understanding exactly why I never wanted to sleep again.

"I wanted to give up, for all I knew once I began to remember they might decide to just send me to the asylum knowing that I was indeed a freak. I couldn't escape, nurses would continue to make comments, even some that were meant to be out of kindness like, 'It's horrible that something so terrible had to happen to someone so innocent,' but it just made me feel worse, they had no idea what I was going through and I refused to take their pity."

"What made you change your mind?" Jasper asked looking into my eyes. I wanted to tell him of what I first saw, but was to afraid of his reaction, what if he thought I was insane too? No one knew I had occasional visions, especially of him, not even Carlisle.

"Everyone used to say it was a miracle I survived when know one else did, and that I was a blessing, even if they did think I was somehow wrong in the head, but to me it was just a curse. It took away everything I ever had, everything I ever remembered. All I could think of was that my life wasn't even worth continuing after that, I didn't even know why I was deemed so wrong that I needed to be sent away, that was until Carlisle found me.

"He had faith in me when no one else did; he worked at another hospital but had colleagues here that he regularly visited. He heard of my condition and insisted that he see me. As soon as he walked in I felt relaxed, he smiled and sat in the beige armchair placed by the side of my bed.

"At first he didn't just say anything, he just looked at me and smiled. 'Hello Alice, my name is Dr. Cullen but you can call me Carlisle seeing as I am not monitoring you,' from that first sentence I became comfortable, he seemed far more caring than anyone I had met so far. He carried on seeing me, I didn't understand why; I didn't care, I was just happy to have someone to talk to.

"After a while he began speaking with certain people, it wouldn't be long until I was well enough to be released, but I had no where to go. Although doctors could find no sign that my health and insanity was an issue they still kept a wary eye on me, it took weeks for Carlisle to convince them that I was ok.

"It took along time, with lawyers and a ton of paper work, but after six months in hospital I was released, and Carlisle was now my adoptive father, he told me lots of his family when he visited, and his wife would often come to see me as well, bringing homemade cakes and cookies with her, I didn't know why they were so kind, Esme instantly treated me as if I was her own daughter and couldn't wait to take me home."

Jasper smiled lightly, I couldn't help smile either, trust Esme and her natural motherly instincts.

"I guess you kind of know the rest, as soon as I arrived I felt home. Edward and Emmett are the best brothers I could ask for, they never asked questions, they just accepted me as if I had always been their little sister, always protecting me, always teasing me. I guess it was slightly less awkward Emmett had been adopted not long before I was."

I shut up after that, we remained quiet for a moment but I could see that Jasper was still deep in thought.

"Did you ever… did you ever find out what was supposedly wrong?" He asked hesitantly. He looked down, afraid he shouldn't have asked.

"I had, I have visions." I stated simply, as if I was merely talking about the weather. I was dreading this question, but I had seen that he would ask it, and I didn't want to lie to him.

"Visions?" He said confused.

"Yes, you see Jasper when I woke up I was in such pain, it was the only thing I new, the first feeling I had ever experienced, I didn't know anything else. That was until I saw a man, so vividly I thought it was real. In ways it was that one person that kept me determined, the real reason I continued to fight."

Jasper raised an eyebrow looking at me quizzically, silently begging for me to continue.

"He was beautiful, I hadn't seen any being in my life but I knew he was perfect. He had sharp blue eyes, the colour of the most deepest ocean, his unruly blonde hair sat just above them, waving out in a neat mess across his head,"

His eyes widened causing me to look down as I carried on telling him of my first vision, I didn't want to know how his expression would change. I was so scared to lose him, but he had to know, after all he did tell me of his life.

"His jaw was strong, and his mouth in a tight line, I didn't know who he was, or why I had seen him, but from then on it was as if it was my destiny to make his perfect mouth smile. After that I had other visions, I knew what the weather would be like most days and could tell when a doctor was planning another check up, but every night I would see that face again and in some ways it made me so upset, yet so happy at the same time.

"I thought there was no hope, that he was just a figment of my imagination, but he was my true companion throughout the whole six months. Some days I thought of just giving up on my search, I didn't tell anyone so how was I supposed to find him?

"That was until Esme showed me many photo albums one day in hope to get me more involved with the family, most of them were her, Carlisle and Edward together, but then a boy showed up in many of them, having water fights with Edward, or playing with Lego.

"I didn't recognise him at first, but he seemed so familiar, it began to annoy the hell out of me; that was until one night it clicked. His hair was the same blonde, his eyes the same blue, I had found him.

"And then I was informed that he was returning. I felt as if my prayers were answered, that finally everything would begin to make sense. The minute he walked in it was confirmed, the face, the little boy, all of it added up.

"The man was you."


AN: Sorry for leaving you hanging! Give me lots of reviews telling me how much you hate me for making you wait even longer for Jasper's response and I'll make sure I update as soon as possible.

Gemma x