Hey everyone I'm sorry it's taken me so long to update but let's just say that life is one crazy bitch. So yea anyway I'm sick and can't breath right so I'm home and am writing the next chapter of this story. So yea I hope all of you are still interested in this story and will read it and review. And as always I own no one except those not of the show, so yes enjoy.
CHAPTER 9; MORE THAN ANYONE.
You need a friend I'll be around
Don't let this end before I see you again
What can I say to convince you
To change your mind?
I'm going to love you more than anyone
I'm going to hold you closer than before- "More than anyone"- Gavin Degraw
Jay kept to his word and waited for Emma to be comfortable in their relationship. It wasn't an easy task, at times the worry and fear seemed to take over who she was and they would fight, over the smallest thing, and it would lead to yelling and screaming and accusations being mad. In the end though her mind would clear and things would calm down between them. Neither one knew how much longer their lives were going to be like this, nor did either know how much more they could handle.
Emma knew that she needed to just relax and calm down that this time with Jay was different, they were different now. He had grown up since the last time they were together, he really loved her and always has, and besides he would never hurt her again in fear of losing her and losing their daughter. She loved him and trusted him, but why she couldn't relax she didn't understand. All Emma wanted was to be happy with him and to live their lives as a family but she couldn't yet. Something was holding her back though, something from their past.
Paige and Emma were out shopping at the mall with Skylar and it wasn't the happy shopping adventure that Paige had planned. Emma was quiet as they traveled from store to store, only giving one word answers or just a nod of her head. And it was frustrating Paige to the point of ripping her hair from her skull. As they were going through the makeup in Victoria's secret Paige got fed up with her friend's tendency to zone out of their conversation. "Emma are you listening to me? Emma!!" when she got no response she threw the tester of a lip gloss at her friend's head, which finally brought Emma back to reality.
"Paige what was that for!?" Emma yelled at her friend and picked up the lip gloss. "It was for not listening when your friend is talking; now tell me what the hell as got you so distracted?" Paige demanded crossing her arms over her chest and giving Emma a look that said she was not messing around Sighing Emma turned back to the make up in front of her not wanting to see Paige's face right now. "I don't know, I keep fighting with Jay about pretty much anything and everything, and its really putting a strain on our relationship, there is just so much tension in the apartment I'm scared about how it will affect Skylar I don't want her to have memories of her parents constantly fighting."
Paige felt bad the moment she heard what has been bothering her friend, and she felt stupid for thinking her problems were more important. "Emma I'm sorry look, why don't we go to the food court and grab something to eat and we'll talk this all out." Paige said taking Skylar's stroller and leading Emma out of the store.
Emma wasn't the only one having a hard time with the current situation Jay sat in his old apartment with Sean watching, or attempting to watch whatever movie Sean had on the television. Sean knew something was bothering his friend and he knew it had to do with Emma, he just didn't know how to bring it up. Lets face it heart to hearts were never Sean's strong point. After a few more minutes of silence between the pair Jay finally spoke up. "Sean I know you know something is wrong so stop staring at me out the corner of your eye." "I'm not staring, I'm glancing occasionally and focusing my eyes on you for moments at a time." He said pausing the movie and turning to his friend. "What's up man you've been, I don't off lately. So either something is wrong with Emma or Sky and I know nothing is wrong with her."
"We've been fighting a lot lately; there is just some much tension between the two of us. It's almost like she is scared to be around me I brought up the idea of us having a night out just me and her with out Skaylar and she freaked out saying she didn't want to go anywhere and was worried about Sky feeling like she was being abandoned." Jay said and leaned back on the couch with his eyes closed. "Look Jay Sky is over the whole abandoned phase, ok so she throws a tantrum every now and then but come on man she's 2 years old. Any way I think Em is using the baby as an excuse." Opening one eye Jay looked at his friend questionably. "I'm giving her time though but it's just so frustrating when some nights she won't even sleep in the same bed as me."
"Look I know but you just need to hang in there, I know it doesn't sound like the best advice but come on we both know Emma and if you push to hard she'll pull even further away, and this time she'll take the baby with her." "Yea it's just to damn hard, I know I screwed up but it happened years ago why can't she just let it go and we can all move on, as a family." ?Jay said and threw his head back in frustration. "Hate to say it but I doubt that is going to happen anytime soon." Sean said making his friend groan in frustration and bang his head against the back of the couch.
After a long and frustrating talk with Paige Emma finally convinced her that she would stop avoiding her boyfriend and actually sit and talk with him about what was bothering her, and convincing Paige Michalchuck of anything was not an easy task. But one that Emma had done and was now sitting at home waiting for her boyfriend top come home, Skylar had already been fed and was in her room playing before bath time.
As she sat on the couch absently watching TV she went over in her head what she wanted to say to Jay when he came home, which wouldn't be long because he always put their daughter to bed. Everything that she thought over was starting to blend together and causing a headache to start. ' Damn why is this so fucking hard to do. I can talk about everything and anything under the Sun.' she thought rubbing her fingers in small circles over her temples trying to will her head to stop throbbing. Emma spun her head around when she heard the click of the front door. "Hey baby how was your day with Paige?" Jay asked coming over and sitting next her. Emma shrugged her shoulders and leaned against him "It was eventful I mean is any day with Paige boring." "This is true." He mumbled and rand his hand gently over her head.
Emma began to feel her headache slowly fade away but she still knew she had to talk to him about what had been bothering her and holding them back in their relationship. With a sigh Emma moved slightly so she was now facing him. "Jay look I know I haven't been myself lately and I think we need to talk about It." she told him and suddenly felt more nervous than before. "Your right we do need to talk about it." Jay sighed and moved to stand up and face her. "Emma I love you with everything I have inside of me and even though you tell me you love me and want to be with me I'm starting to feel like your regretting ever letting me back in your life." The ending of his statement came out a little harsher than intended but he couldn't help it his frustration had been building for so long.
Emma stood up and stared at him not being able to form words for a moment. "Is that what you think that I don't love you? You're in my home Jay, in my bed every night and trust me if I didn't love you, then you would not be here right now." She said her anger starting to come up now. "I don't know Emma I thought when we got back together this time that we were going to move on with our lives and start fresh but you won't let us." he was getting angry and the two of them angry was never good, it never got them any where.
"I'm so sorry Jay that you hurt me so bad that I had to move away from here." "Emma all I'm asking for is if you love me then tell me why you are pulling away from me why can't we start fresh I don't want to pick up where we left off I want a new start with you and our daughter. Just please Emma let's move on, let's start over." He was calmer now and Emma just stood there her arms crossed she didn't know hat to do she was still so scared she loved him so much and just wanted to feel secure in that he was in this for the long haul.
"I do love you Jay I always have. I just am so scared of something happening and then we aren't together anymore. I just want.." she couldn't continue it was getting too hard for her. Jay crossed the room to her and placed his hands on her face and gently stroked her check. "Em look at me what is it that you just want." He spoke quietly and soothingly to her. Emma opened her eyes and took a deep breath I just want to know that you want me and only me forever, because you are all I'll ever want." She said to him and closed her eyes again starting to feel tears. "That's what you want?" he asked her and she nodded. "Ok then stay here for a minute ok, don't leave." He told her and received another nod of her head.
When she felt him leave Emma took a few deep breaths calming herself down so that they could continue. Not even a minute later Jay came back into the room with something in his hand. "Ok you want proof well I have it right here for you." He said held out a small black velvet box in front of her. When Emma didn't say anything Jay continued "I've had this ever since that night Skylar got sick and you had to come back from your date. Emma I knew in high school that I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life, and after that night I knew that I still wanted that still wanted you. Will you marry me Emma?" he said opening the box reveling an elegant and simple diamond ring to her.
Emma just stood there glancing between him and the ring stunned into silence. "Jay….."
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
And I'm going to leave you hanging there. I'm sorry if this chapter wasn't very good but I just got over my writers block so please review it I hope your still interested in it.
Allie
