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Hard to Swallow
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Kisuke and Isshin shared a room with Tessai, while Ikkaku and Kira crashed with Ichigo. It was an okay arrangement, except that Kira had yet to return. And it was almost two in the morning. Ikkaku was antsy and kept turning and tossing, keeping Ichigo awake with the noise.
The redhead couldn't blame Ikkaku – he had had such fights before with Byakuya and it was impossible to sleep afterwards. It was also near impossible to just forget his pride and go make things right, because he was still hurt and confused and angry.
It hadn't helped that Byakuya had been such an arrogant, know-it-all, repressed idiot. Even though four years had passed, the raven-haired shinigami captain had yet to talk to Ichigo to resolve their break up.
Ichigo sighed silently; he had enjoyed – somewhat – that short relationship with the noble. They had both known they were incompatible – they had nothing in common other than protecting Rukia – but Byakuya had been inquisitive about the probability of it working and Ichigo had been too stubborn to recognize the defeat. Plus, Byakuya was a great teacher and Ichigo had learned a lot from him, especially in certain areas where Ichigo lacked expertise.
If only Byakuya had acknowledged that he isn't just a block of ice, perhaps we could have worked it out. Ichigo smiled humorlessly. Yeah, and while I'm at it, I wish that Rukia didn't die either.
While he didn't like to dwell on it, Ichigo knew the breaking point of his and Byakuya's liaison was Rukia's death. After Gin slew her in front of Renji, Byakuya became obsessively focused on locating Gin and revenging Rukia. Nothing Ichigo did could break that focus. Nothing anyone did could break that focus. Even Renji's emotional collapse had bypassed the formidable Kuchiki Byakuya intellect; Ichigo and Hisagi had been the ones to pick up the pieces.
There was a painful ache in Ichigo's throat when he compared the vibrant, loud and self-assured Renji he first got to know and the current silent, grave and humorless Renji. Hisagi had managed to crack the shell the redhead had built around himself, but nothing would bring back the reckless, stupid, dedicated bravado that so endeared Renji to his comrades in the first place.
Ikkaku behind Ichigo rolled over again, the meaty thump of his leg on the futon breaking into Ichigo's thoughts. Ikkaku had suffered loss too, Ichigo remembered. He had grieved along with Ise and Isane when they visited the beautiful and elegant grave marker, carved by Ikkaku himself for Ayasegawa Yumichika. The reiatsu-absorbing ability of his zanpakuto had killed Yumichika. Ikkaku sank into a nadir of despair and was actively trying to drown to death in alcohol, when Kira (of all people) literally kicked some sense into Ikkaku's head.
"I know I'm keepin' ya awake, Ichigo, sorry," muttered Ikkaku.
Ichigo turned over. "It's okay. I don't have lessons tomorrow." He hesitated, then ventured, "You sure you want to stay here?"
"Yeah. I'll wait, but I ain't lookin' fer him."
"Aren't you worried?"
"He's a big boy, he can take care o' himself."
Ichigo rolled his eyes before remembering that Ikkaku wouldn't know. "But he's been gone ages. Just say sorry and bring him back."
Ikkaku was silent. His breathing was heavy, and Ichigo wondered what Ikkaku was thinking about. The bald man finally said, "I don't feel sorry for what I said. If I did feel sorry, I'd've been the first to tear off after 'im. But I don't."
"What does feeling sorry have to do with it?" whispered Ichigo agitatedly.
"Everything. I'd've needed ta apologize ta get him to come back, see, and I ain't gonna lie."
"You – you moron," hissed Ichigo. Feeling exasperated with Ikkaku and the whole damn business, Ichigo kicked off his blanket and stomped out. He almost stepped on Yuki in the corridor, but the feline merely rubbed against his leg before padding into Jinta's bedroom.
It was after he hopped down the ladder rungs into the basement he noticed that the lights were on. Frowning, Ichigo called out, "Who is it?"
"Ichigo-san." A lithe figure emerged from behind a rock. Kira brushed the back of his hand over his brow; he was perspiring freely. He had just had a workout, evidently, but it was not like it was a gym – Ichigo smiled when Kisuke emerged. Then the smile disappeared when Isshin appeared as well.
"Darling firstborn!" cried Isshin and ran to embrace Ichigo. "Did you miss daddy-taichou's bedtime stories so much you had to find-"
"NO." Ichigo slammed the heel of his right palm into Isshin's face. "Kira, what are you doing here?"
The blond didn't look at Ichigo. "Training."
"At two in the morning?" asked Ichigo. "Ikkaku's worried sick upstairs, even if he won't admit it."
Kira awarded the redhead a cool look. "So?"
"So? Go on up, just – Kira." Ichigo sighed. "You know he practically worships you. Just – just go up and you don't have to say a thing."
"And admit that I was in the wrong? No."
Ichigo was frustrated now. "What the hell is wrong with you two? Saying sorry is that hard?"
"That's our business and I'd thank you to keep out of it," warned Kira icily. If the blond was channeling someone, than he had just brought Byakuya into the conversation. It riled Ichigo immediately.
"I'm concerned-"
Kisuke stepped in before it could turn into a pissing match. "Okay! It's late, we're all tired, and so shall we just adjourn to our beds?"
Stretching in the most fake yawn ever, Isshin casually directed his lieutenant towards the stairs, all the while engaging him in some conversation. If Isshin was boisterous idiocy with his blood-son Ichigo, he was tender protectiveness with Kira.
Kisuke rounded on Ichigo. "We were counseling him our way, Ichigo. You almost ruined it all."
"What?" Ichigo was understandably confused. "He's here training with you guys when Ikkaku is wearing holes in his futon trying to sleep. I don't understand why you didn't just push him upstairs."
The older blond sighed. "Ichigo, Kira Izuru is a very arrogant man, in case your thick, lead-lined head didn't realize. He knows his abilities and his limits, and that fact makes for a self-assured male. Add to the fact that he could keep Gin satisfied professionally and privately, and there you have a very accomplished shinigami and lover."
"How would you know he kept Ichimaru satisfied?" asked Ichigo, somewhat sourly. "He told you?"
Kisuke whistled and sauntered past Ichigo. "My, grandmama, what big eyes you have," he whispered in Ichigo's ears before he walked away. "I have my ways, Ichigo, and I've been reading people far longer than you."
Irritated, the redhead followed the shopkeeper's footsteps. Just as they reached the base of the rungs, Kisuke paused.
"I'll follow you tomorrow to Aizen's place tomorrow," said Kisuke, not looking at Ichigo.
"You sure?" asked Ichigo, concerned. The last two times they had been there Kisuke had been very quiet and had remained so for the rest of the day. On the other hand he would appreciate any help in mediating between Kira and Ikkaku.
Kisuke half-turned, the striped hat obscuring his eyes. "I think I'm needed there. I do not have to like it."
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The car's air-conditioning was not that cold, but the atmosphere was chilly enough to make Ichigo try not to shiver.
Kira sat in the front beside Ichigo who was driving, while Ikkaku sat directly behind Kira. It was half an hour's drive, and it felt far too long. The redhead almost sighed with relief when the car turned into the driveway, and he knew Kisuke had the same reaction when he glanced into the rear view mirror.
Kira got out of the car without waiting and Ikkaku slammed the door hard enough to rattle.
"Glad you're here to help," quipped Ichigo to the remaining passenger of his car.
Kisuke tipped his hat. "At your service, from the Urahara Shoten."
They got out and strode to the door, where the other pair was waiting. Kisuke unlocked the door.
Ikkaku looked about him. The furnishings were still in place, though the rooms had been stripped to the bare minimum. "What d'ya want me t'do?"
"What was your mission about?" inquired Kisuke.
"Mm. Ukitake just said get as much info as I can from ya, and to assist you in research and recovery."
Kira tugged on Ichigo's sleeve. "Could you please..." He couldn't finish his sentence, but Ichigo understood.
"This way."
It was a familiar path down the corridor and then a right turn. Ichigo could still recall the first time he came to this house, observing how carefully Aizen had carried Ichimaru to the hammock in the lounge, and the frantic night before their deaths when he had sprinted to the bedroom in response to Ichimaru's shriek of fear.
Kisuke and Ichigo hadn't moved the gigai that Aizen and Ichimaru discarded since the day they left, figruing that it could wait until the bulkier items were moved. Privately Ichigo knew he didn't wish to disturb the peaceful scene that was laid out in the room. He also suspected that Kisuke was reluctant to touch either of the gigai. One had been his lover (part of Ichigo was incredibly jealous about that) and the other had been his lover's soulmate.
When Kira stepped into the bedroom he stopped breathing. Ichimaru was still lying on the bed, while Aizen was seated and bent over the frail form, his broad torso covering the slender one below him in a final embrace.
"Taichou," Ichigo heard Kira whisper. The pale blond moved forward as if in a trance. His thin fingers reached out and touched first Ichimaru's foot.
Ichigo watched from the door as Kira walked steadily up to the two gigai. When Kira flattened his palm on Aizen's shoulder Ichigo thought he was going to push it aside. Instead Kira gently shifted Aizen and carried the gigai to a chair. "Thank you, Aizen-taichou, for making him happy at last," said Kira and bowed to the lifeless gigai as it could hear.
Ichigo half-expected Aizen to reach out and pat Kira's head. He shook the notion out of his mind; Aizen was dead. Ichimaru was dead.
Kira returned to the bedside. The slim hand reached out and stroked the fine silver hair, parting it and brushing it from the closed eyes.
"Still so thin," muttered Kira under his breath, but the words carried in the still air of the room. The blond sat down where Aizen's gigai had been. He then bent to kiss Ichimaru's brow and then the lips. Ichigo wondered vaguely if the gigai was still warm or was it cold like a corpse? Then he realized that Kira was trembling.
"Kira?"
"I'm – I'm fine. I just – could you give me some space?"
"Sure." Ichigo slid back and closed the door.
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Kisuke was directing the packing of several large volumes while he carried a slim laptop in his arms. Ichigo walked over to him and said softly, "Kira's upset."
"In the bedroom?" asked Kisuke equally quietly.
"Mm-hmm. I don't know what to say to him."
Kisuke glanced at Ikkaku who was on the far side of the study, boxing up the last few books. "It shouldn't be you who's going to say anything, Ichigo." Raising his voice, Kisuke called Ikkaku over.
The captain put down the box he was carrying. "Yeah, what?"
"Go to the room down the corridor and on the right."
"Why?"
"Recovery. Ichigo and I will load the boxes here onto the car, don't worry."
Ikkaku shrugged and strode off.
"Let's go," said Kisuke, pulling Ichigo with him. "We'll leave them here for an hour or two. Perhaps three."
"What? But the books-"
"Screw the books. Come on, we leave now." Kisuke winked conspiratorially at Ichigo. "I'll even buy you a mocha."
"Huh?" Ichigo frowned as he was tugged along and then finally the light bulb above his head sputtered to life. "Oh. Oh! Okay!"
The two quickly exited, started the car, and drove out of the compound. Somewhat relieved, Ichigo blew out a breath he had been holding. "Let's hope this works."
"Since when have my plans failed?" said Kisuke. Ichigo raised his brows at the blond shopkeeper. There was a long beat of silence. The shopkeeper squirmed in discomfort as Ichigo maintained the expression until the light turned green and they had to drive off. Kisuke sighed. "Okay, bad mention. Let's just get your mocha."
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