A/N: Hello! Huge thanks to my followers, those who have favorited, and to those who have reviewed. You guys are amazing. I hope you guys like this!
Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who or anything related. That all goes to the BBC.
The Doctor watched as Rose circled the console. She was an absolute mess. Her hair was in knots and there was dried blood caked on her dress, but he still thought she was the most gorgeous creature he had ever known. "Rose?" he called softly.
She lifted her eyes to his. "I feel amazing," she replied.
"Excuse me?"
"Since the moment those meteors hit the ship, I've felt horrible. Like I was slowly draining away to nothingness. Like there was a piece of me missing. But now? Now I feel whole again."
The Doctor frowned at her confession. "Rose, I need to check you out in the MedBay."
She shrugged. "There's no need. I know now what the problem is."
"This is serious, Rose. Before everything that happened with the Master, I made the mistake of letting go of whatever ailments you had whenever you told me you were fine." He moved forward to stand directly in front of her. "I almost lost you then and I almost lost you tonight. I will not make the same mistakes again."
Rose leaned forward and embraced the Doctor tightly. "I'm fine, Doctor. Really truly. And I'm not just saying that. It's the TARDIS."
"What do you mean?" he asked as he pulled back.
"Remember what I told you before? We're connected now. In almost every fiber of my being, the TARDIS and I are connected. She's my literal lifeline."
The Doctor's hearts began racing. "I understand that, Rose. But, don't you see how dangerous that is? What if something ever happened to the TARDIS? I couldn't lose you both."
"Silly, Time Lord. You're not going to lose either one of us. The TARDIS and I are both fine."
"But, not always. Don't you remember what happened to the Old Girl the very first time we fell into that parallel universe? Do you remember what happened on Krop Tor? You didn't feel any affects from those instances because it was still too soon. But, what about what happened to you when the Weeping Angel sent us back to 1969? You passed out several times, you were horribly weak, I could barely get you to eat-"
"And it all worked out in the end, so I'm fine now! Doctor, I refuse to live my life in fear that one day something's going to happen to the TARDIS and I'll drop dead." The Doctor practically growled in her response, but she ignored him and continued, "Don't you see the gift we've been given? Because my life as been tied to Her's, that means that I'll most likely get to stay with you a hell of a lot longer than we planned. You're not going to have to watch me grow old and wither away."
"Don't say stuff like that," he whispered.
"Don't make me feel like you hate that I'm stuck with you."
"Rose! I would never... I could never..."
She shook her head and gave a small smile. "I know, Doctor. I know that you don't actually feel that way."
He leaned forward and pressed his lips to her forehead. "I was so scared, Rose. I was so scared that I was going to lose you up there. You were so weak, and then... then you went all Bad Wolf."
"Did I?"
The Doctor sighed, forgetting that she didn't remember those details. "You did. I reckon it was the Old Girl's little way of protecting you as best she could from so far away." The lights in the control room flickered in response. "I'll take that as a yes then?" the Doctor said with a chuckle.
"But, why can't I remember?" Rose questioned.
He rubbed his hand over his face as he answered, "Same reason you can't remember everything that happened on Satellite 5 is my guess. Rose, when you go all Bad Wolfy, you basically have the entire Time Vortex running through your mind. Remembering all that could quite possibly kill you. Or at the very least, drive you mad."
"I just wished I knew what happened."
"I tell you anything you want to know. But, first, we really do need to visit the MedBay."
She gave a small pout. "Why?"
"Because I know for a fact that one of the Host's halos caught you across the stomach, and while I know that the TARDIS is helping you heal at a faster rate than usual, I really would like to have a look and get it nice and cleaned up."
"There!" the Doctor announced. "All better."
"Yeah? Where's my lolly?" she asked with a tongue and teeth grin.
He looked around frantically. "Uhhh... All out?"
Rose shook her head. "Rubbish doctor, you are."
"Oi! I'm not rubbish! I just left my stash of lollies in my brown suit."
"Course you did," she said before letting out a yawn.
"Sleepy?"
"A bit. But, I really need a shower before I even think about bed."
"Tell you what then, you go on and shower and I'll meet you in your room when your done? Is that okay?"
"Sounds fine. Give me about an hour, yeah?"
"Perfect."
Rose took a deep breath as she felt the hot water from her shower, pour down her back. It had been one hell of a day. Between saying goodbye to both Jack and Martha, having a slight run in with a past version of the Doctor, and then everything that happened aboard the Titanic, she was wiped.
The Titanic.
She cringed. It definitely was not one of those "everybody lives" moments. Oh, how she wished it was.
She clamped her eyes shut, but was met with an image of Aleena. The sweet girl she had met right before the meteorites hit. She curses herself as she remembers the promise she gave the girl...
"Listen, my friend and I are going to figure out what's going on around here alright. I promise. Go enjoy the rest of the evening with your family."
And they figured it out. Just not before practically everyone on the ship was killed.
Rose remembered the look of hope on the young girl's face.
"You sure you and your friend will work everything out?" she had asked.
"Promise."
Images of the Steward being hurtled out into space hit her next, followed by the sight of hundreds of bodies floating amongst the stars. Including Aleena's mother, Josie.
Death after death came back to her in waves. Morvin, Foon, Bannakaffalatta, all of them.
Her breathing became erratic as she saw Astrid falling to her death and she just watched it happen. Even her assault on Rickston came back to haunt her.
Rose felt her knees turn to jelly as she collapsed on the floor of the shower and began sobbing.
The Doctor bounced joyfully as he made his way towards Rose's bedroom. Not only had he found his bag of lollies. He found three orange ones (her personal favorite) and two banana ones (his personal favorite)! But, to top off all of that, while she showered, he stayed in the MedBay and was able to come up with a new vitamin supplement for her to take. While it wouldn't completely cure her if, Rassilon forbid, something ever did happen to the TARDIS, it would definitely help take away some of the horrible side affects, such as the dizziness and weakness.
Running a hand through his hair, the Doctor opened Rose's bedroom door. "Rose! You'll never guess what I... found..." He looked around the room and found it to be completely empty. Odd that. Suddenly he felt a sense of distress hit him. Rose! If his ship could talk, he felt that she would have just yelled that at him. The door to Rose's en suite flung open.
He hurled himself inside and found Rose curled up on the floor of the shower as water beat down on her. Running quickly, the Doctor shut the water off and grabbed a large, fluffy towel, thanking his ship heartily for her care and concern. Rose's nudity wasn't something he was paying any mind to in this moment, but he knew Rose might be embarrassed later on.
Laying the towel over her gently, the Doctor began to speak softly. "Rose? Rose can you hear me?" He heard her give a muffled cry. "Ssshhh. You're alright now, Rose. I'm here and you're safe. I'm going to pick you up now. Okay, love?"
When he saw her give a small nod, he gently picked her up and cradled her in his arms. Not even wanting to bother with moving, the Doctor slid down so he was sitting with his back propped against the wall. He clutched her tightly when he felt her sobs grow stronger. "That's right, love. You just let it all out."
What he wouldn't give to have Jackie in this universe right now. He briefly considered going back before any ghost shifts or their encounter with Torchwood, just so Rose could visit with her mum for a bit. Jackie would first have to agree though to let him alter her memories after, and that would take a bit of convincing, but still, it was just too risky. Unfortunately (or not so unfortunate, depending on who you asked), the Doctor and Rose had visited Jackie Tyler far too often. Their timelines were so entwined trying to land at just the right moment would be next to impossible.
The Doctor kissed the top of Rose's head. Guess it was just the two of them. Rassilon, he was thick. How did he not see that this would happen the second she was alone? She's not even over what happened with the Master, but then, to add everything that happened on the Titanic? That was too much for anyone to bear.
After what felt like hours, but in reality was only forty-five minutes, the last of Rose's sobs abated. Looking at the counter next to him, the Doctor saw a pair of Rose's comfiest jim jams. Sending, once again, a thanks to the TARDIS, the Doctor sat himself up straighter.
"Rose, love?" he said to her as he brushed a lock of hair off her face.
She looked up at him.
"I want you to put your jim jams on now, alright? I'll turn my back, but I'll stay the whole time."
She gave a small nod before scooting off his lap. The Doctor stood slowly as he shook the pins and needs out of his legs, and helped Rose do the same as she clutched the towel to her chest.
Once the Doctor had turned his back, Rose slowly slipped her night clothes on, feeling horribly embarrassed for the display she just presented. God, what must he think of her? She cleared her throat when she was done changing. The Doctor turned around and gave her a tight smile before grabbing her hand and leading her out the door.
Both were shocked to find that they were no longer in Rose's bedroom, but the Doctor's.
"Oh," he exclaimed. "Um. I suppose the TARDIS thinks we should sleep here. Is that alright with you?" he asked timidly.
Rose gave a small nod as the Doctor led her to the bed and told her to get comfy. "I'm just going to get changed and then I'll be right back. Will you be okay?" Again she nodded.
When the Doctor returned, barely a minute later, he found Rose sitting straight up in bed and staring straight forward. "Rose?"
"You should really just leave me behind."
The Doctor blinked. That was the first time she had spoken since he found her in the shower and that's what she has to say? "I'm sorry... What?"
"I'm a huge liability. I'm broken, Doctor, and I don't know if I'll ever be fixed. You should really just leave me behind."
He crossed the room quickly. "Don't you ever so much as think those terrible things again."
Rose met his gaze. "Why not? It's the truth. I'm a mess, Doctor. I can't even go an entire evening without breaking down."
"That's not true, Rose."
"It is!"
"You were doing just fine up until the collision with the meteors and we lost the TARDIS."
"No, I wasn't," she whispered. "I was a wreck. That's why I slipped into the ladies room. I was having a panic attack and didn't want you to know. God, I couldn't even dance with you because I was so terrified of everyone around us."
"Rose..." the Doctor's hearts broke. He sat down next to her and tried to pull her into his arms, but she resisted.
"See! You feel sorry for me! You feel guilty and responsible. But, I'm a risk, Doctor. Not just to you, but to everyone around us. I even attacked that Rickston bloke and you hate violence!"
"Rose Tyler, I do not feel sorry for you. I'm sad. Sad and mad and, yes, perhaps a bit guilty. But, Rose, you are not a liability! This was too much too soon. Not just for you, but for me too. We're both still recovering from our experiences with the Master. We pushed ourselves too far. And as for Rickston, well, you gave him what's been coming to him for a long time. I don't always approve of violence, but you were defending yourself and your friends from his insults. I can't fault you for that."
Rose blinked back her tears. "I'm just so scared that I'm always going to feel this way."
"I know, Rose. And I understand. But, you won't. We won't. We'll get better. We'll recover. It'll just take us some time."
Rose fell into his embrace. "Good thing you're a Time Lord then, yeah?"
The Doctor chuckled. "Yeah. Come on," he said when he saw her yawn. "Time for bed."
She looked uneasy as they both settled down on the pillows. He stroked her hair softly. "Sleep now, love. I'll be here the whole night."
Rose sighed contently as her eyes closed. "My Doctor."
Hours later, the Doctor opened his eyes when he felt Rose tossing and turning in her sleep. Placing his fingers on her temples, he began sending her soothing thoughts and banishing the nightmares away.
He tried not to look. He really did, but Rose was projecting rather loudly and suddenly he was hit with several visions.
The Master leaning over her. Threatening her.
The last of the humans. Utopia.
Daleks and Cybermen warring at Canary Wharf.
He saw himself screaming in anguish with the chameleon arch attached to his head.
Finally, he saw Astrid as she plunged to her death.
And lastly, he saw a young girl and heard the promise Rose made to her.
The Doctor slipped out of Rose's mind and shook his head. Something wasn't sitting right as he recalled his and Rose's conversation with Midshipman Alonso Frame...
"The computer's not picking up on any other life forms, I'm afraid. There could just be a glitch in the system, but I think we're the only ones who made it."
"What about any of the lifeboats?" the Doctor brought up, still holding out hope for Rose that one of the friends she had made earlier in the evening had survived.
"Only one is unaccounted for."
"So there could be survivors?"
"It's highly unlikely. It was one of the small pods that's used for supplies. I don't even think there would be room for anyone. And if there were any life forms aboard, that were alive, the life boat would have automatically sent out a distress signal. There's been nothing."
Rose rubbed her eyes before a thought crossed her mind. "If there was no one aboard... then how did it leave?"
Alonso shrugged. "It was near where the first meteor hit. I think it dislodged on impact."
But that didn't make any sense. The Doctor felt a niggling in the back of his mind. Something in the timelines felt off. Incomplete. Something was wrong and if the Doctor didn't at least try to fix it...
He slipped out of bed and placed his hand on the wall, sending a silent plea to his ship to help keep Rose peacefully asleep for as long as possible. He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Rose's cheek. "I know I promised to stay the whole night, but if I'm right about what I'm thinking, then I think you might forgive me. Sleep well, love."
Coming Soon: Part Nine...
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