Here's chapter 9! Oh and Glee isn't mine. Hey that rhymed lol.
Thank you oh so much to jjake09 for beta'ing this chapter for me, you rock. Really people, he does, you should check out his puckurt story. Also thanks for reviewing peeps!
There is more nice Rachel in this chapter. I hope y'all like it!
Puck
Rachel was standing in front of me, telling me she would actually listen to my issues while I sat in Kurt's bed wearing only a T-shirt and a blanket. Fucking weird is what that is. I just sat there for a while trying to decide whether or not I really wanted to open up to her. She is a Jew, and she has gay dads, so maybe she could help, but that's crazy, right? I mean this is Rachel Berry. But really I do want things to get better, especially with me and Kurt, so… what can it hurt, really?
"Dude, I cried after sex the other day, then I kissed Santana, Kurt and I talked that out though. I feel so fucked up and I hate it, I'm the Puckasaurus, I'm not supposed to feel this way. Ever."
Rachel gave me a shocked look and blushed from her collar bone up to her hair line. Even her ears were red.. "We- well," she stuttered before clearing her throat. "You looked like you two were doing just fine, um, earlier." As she said that last part she was looking intently at her hands, which were fiddling with the bottom of her shirt.
I chuckled, I couldn't help it. As shitty as I've been feeling, it amused me to see her so damn nervous. "Yeah, well, you two didn't help. But really, it was good and all but I had to work hard on trying to keep myself from feeling bad about it. The sex I mean, and, well, loving him. I keep feeling ashamed and guilty." I couldn't believe I was saying all this to Rachel freaking Berry. I really am fucked.
Rachel walked over, then carefully sat down near me. "That makes sense Noah. Your mom is treating you badly, even being ashamed of you and Kurt's relationship. So you feeling conflicted makes sense. But you know that no matter what she says, you are not wrong, right?"
"I try to believe that, but it's really hard. You know I called my nana and she said that me and Kurt, what we're doing is a to'eivah."
"Oh, Noah! That is not true. God created us all, right?" I nodded. "So that means he also created gay people. He doesn't think you are an abomination, only ignorant, scared people do." She launched herself at me then, throwing her arms around me in a bone crushing hug. The blanket slipped a little.
"Whoa, Rachel, watch the blankets!" She jumped a little and I yanked the covers back up, hopefully preventing her from seeing my junk.
She giggled, I'm not lying. "Sorry Puck," she said while blushing harder than she had before.
"You just called me Puck."
"Yeah…"
"I'm not complaining, but you always call me Noah."
"Well, considering the circumstance, I decided that your nickname was a better choice."
I just looked at her like she was crazy for a moment and I'm pretty sure the look was right on point. "You're weird."
She just smiled at me for a moment. "Seriously though Noah. Being gay is nothing to be ashamed of. If you want I could try to talk to your mother for you."
"Thanks but I don't think it will do much good. She can be pretty stubborn. Hopefully she will come around like everyone keeps saying she will. Really, Rachel, I just want to be happy again. All the time, or at least most, like I was before my mom threw me out."
"Well, I don't know what I could do to make you feel better all the time, but what about a party?"
I looked at her like she was crazy again. "Huh?"
"Well, my dads are going out of town this weekend, so I could throw a party for all the glee club members. I'm sure if I tell my dads why I'm throwing it, they will even give me the ok."
"Ok?" What the fuck, am I in some kind of alternate universe?
"It's settled then!" With that she got up and disappeared up the stairs.
Man, that chick is strange.
Not long after She left, Kurt came back down stairs.
"Hey baby, what took you so long?"
"I was having a heart to heart with Finn and something tells me we were ambushed. Did Rachel come down here all concerned?"
I laughed. "Yeah, it was weird. But as strange as it was I do kinda feel better. At least a little bit. She's throwing a party for me this weekend. I'm not sure how that'll go, but as long as there's booze, I'm cool.
Kurt looked at me kind of concerned. "Honey, are you sure you should drink when you're so sad?"
I smiled at him, "yeah baby I'll be fine. I just need to let loose a little you know?"
He smiled back at me. "Yeah, that makes sense I guess."
"What did you and Finn talk about?"
"Not much, he's worried about you and he could tell that things are… different between us."
I could feel the light mood that I had adopted start to fade. "Baby, I'm sorry."
He climbed onto my lap. "There is no need for you to be sorry." He smiled down at me, then wrapped his arms around me.
"Yes there is," I said as he leaned back to look at me. "I'm the reason everything is different."
"No, Noah, you did not make your mom and nana so close minded."
"Ok, but I am the reason we fought that night, and the reason you don't feel like you can trust me anymore."
"Honey… I… well shit. Look that is as much my fault as it is yours. I'm the one who blew everything out of proportion."
I just looked at him, unconvinced.
'Noah, baby, I never meant for you to think I don't trust you. I do, I'm just so worried about you that I've started thinking I might loose you. The other night, when I saw Sam flirting with you, I guess I just freaked. I love you so much and the thought of loosing you, especially to someone else really scares me."
I kissed him because honestly I didn't know what to say.
"Here," Kurt said while grabbing my hand and pulling me to my feet. "Oh my Noah! You still don't have pants on?"
I just smiled and pulled him into a kiss. "Nope," I whispered against his mouth. Then he started laughing and stepped back. "What's so funny?"
At this point he had leaned down with his hands on his knees trying to calm himself but failing. He put a hand up in a 'just a minute' gesture and I couldn't do anything but just sit and wait.
After what seemed like a long time, he calmed down. "It's just, you had a heart to heart with Rachel pants-less?" He started laughing again and I joined this time. It was pretty funny and it felt good to laugh with him. Really, it felt good to be laughing period. I hadn't been doing much of that in the past few days.
"So," Kurt said as he stepped closer to me. "You gonna put some pants on, or should we work on making you happy some more?"
I closed the distance between us. "Do I really have to answer that question?"
He smiled and shook his head, then pushed me back on the bed.
Kurt
The next few days went fairly well, or at least Kurt thought so. Noah and him had been doing it at every possible moment. Kurt knew that this wasn't a permanent solution to his boyfriend's sadness, but he figured it was better than other, more destructive choices. He had also been helping Noah by keeping him focused on school work and glee club whenever Burt and/or Carole were around. Overall Kurt felt like things were getting better for Noah, al least a little. His breakdowns were becoming less frequent and shorter lived and he seemed happier overall. Kurt was thinking all this as he sat at his dresser mirror getting ready for school that Friday. He was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of someone running down the stairs. He didn't have to look up to know it was Noah.
"Mornin baby," he said as he left a quick kiss on Kurt's head before running into the bathroom for his morning shower.
"Morning honey," Kurt shouted, "You know if you didn't stay up so late you wouldn't be rushing every morning!"
Just before the shower came on Noah yelled, "bite me!"
"Name the time and place lover, and I'll be glad to," Kurt called as he gathered his things and headed up the stairs. The looks he got from Carole, Burt and Finn told him that they had heard what he had just said. He chuckled to himself, then headed to get some breakfast. He was just finishing his yogurt and granola when Noah burst out of the basement door. Kurt stood up and shoved a banana and a travel mug full of coffee into his boyfriend's hands.
They headed out the door with Finn following close behind. The school day went by pretty well for Kurt, mostly. The first half was normal, he went to his classes, gossiped with Mercedes and Tina and insulted Rachel Barry once and complimented her twice. That last part was a pretty new development. Through Finn, Rachel had started becoming his friend. The insult was to keep him grounded. When lunch came around things took a turn. He was heading toward the cafeteria when someone stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. He spun around worried that Karofsky had gotten bored with staying away. Who he saw when he turned surprised him.
"Sam, hey."
"Hey Kurt, I was wondering if we could talk."
"O…K" He followed Sam into a deserted classroom. "So, what do you want to talk about?"
Sam smiled shyly. "Well, I wanted some help and Puck told me I should talk to you."
"Ok," Kurt said, starting to get slightly exasperated. "What do you need help with?"
"Well, I'm having issues with coming out at school. I actually thought about using Quinn as my beard." Kurt looked appropriately appalled even though he already knew this bit of information. "Yeah, and the thing is, I've been out for a while now. Really I've never been so freaked about coming out. Back at Dalton Academy I was out, I even had a boyfriend there for a while. But then I came here and even though you and Puck are out and its pretty cool, I've heard about how bad it was. I even heard that the only reason you and Puck don't get messed with is that nobody wants to deal with the wrath of Puck. I've even been slushied and that's with Karofsky thinking I'm straight."
"I see your dilemma here, but really you only have two choices. One, stay in the closet here and be miserable or come out and risk maybe being bullied. But really Sam, you are on the football team. I don't think you have too much to worry about." Kurt started inching toward the door. "So, are we done here?"
Sam reached out and placed a hand on Kurt's shoulder, causing him to turn around. "Wait, I wanna do something for you. You know, to say thanks."
"Thanks Sam, but its not like I told you anything you wouldn't have come up with on your own. I really have to get to lunch now so if you'll excuse me…" He turned to leave again.
He made it out the door and down the hall when Sam caught up with him. "So, Kurt, I think I know what I can do for you." Kurt raised an eyebrow at him in question. "Just meet me after school, k?" Sam turned to leave.
"Wait, Sam, I have Noah and Finn to take home."
"I bet they can find another ride. Trust me, you'll like this." Sam smiled and Kurt wasn't sure he trusted it. "After school, in the choir room, you won't regret it." With that he turned on his heel and jogged off, leaving a very confused and suspicious Kurt behind.
Reviews make me sparkle! Wow that was gay
