Pond found her attempt to distance herself from the vicar more difficult than she had anticipated. She found him outside the police station the next day with a copy of the morning paper. "Have you seen The Harold today?" Paul handed her the news.
The detective looked in horror at the cover of The Harold with a picture of Jack Marshall and the headline reading "Ex-peado Lives Next To Latimer's." Pond threw the paper on the ground and yelled up to the sky. "Why!? For fuck's sake! Who leaked this?! Oh, I swear if I find out how this happened I will fu..." She looked at the reverend standing with his big blue eyes wide in shock and she attempted to compose herself. "Sorry, Vicar."
Paul nodded timidly. "Do you honestly think he had anything to do with it?" He asked.
"I cannot say for certain, it's still an ongoing investigation. But his past is working against him." Pond picked up the stomped on newspaper from the ground.
"I don't know if it's fair to judge him for his past. We all have our foibles." Paul looked down at the ground as he spoke as if he were admitting to his own shortcomings as well as Jack's.
"Guess so." Pond gave a curt nod goodbye "Vicar.." Inside the police station, office was abuzz as people scrambled to tidy up the mess the headlines had caused. There were frantic calls from citizens and multiple calls from Jack himself, who was now in fear of his safety. The Chief Superintendent had to call a meeting with the two detectives in her office. "How strong of a suspect is Jack really?" C.S. Jenkinson asked.
"He had strong ties to Danny, has a previous conviction, a weak alibi and Danny's phone was in his possession." Pond went over her list.
"Who else?" she asked with a heavy sigh. Even with the doors closed, the sound phones ringing off the hook bled through the walls. Jenkinson was more than a little stressed at the moment.
"Mark Latimer was very quick to lie about where he was and even had a false alibi pre-set up. And according to Oswald's son, Mark hit Danny once and split his lip." Pond looked at the last name on the list. "Then there's the vicar." She took a breath, the weight of her feelings quickly tugging at her chest. She just as quickly brushed it off and continued. "His alibi is weak, he taught Danny's computer class and his church looks directly over the Latimer house."
"Tread lightly, Pond." The C.S. warned. "We can do without offending the church."
"Well, better hope it's not him then." Pond's sharp, emotionless reply made Clara snicker. Hearing Clara laugh made Pond almost smile herself, but only almost. The stress of work was getting to her, her nightmares were coming back. She'd woken up screaming the other night and nearly scared Becca Fisher to death.
"Is there anything I can do?" Becca asked. "I'm sorry but the room downstairs was complaining about the noise."
"I'm sorry. I'm... taking some... I'm taking barbiturates." Pond hated admitting to needing drugs. "I'll be fine... and tell the room downstairs I do apologize." She quickly closed the door in Becca's face and took the last pill she had in her bottle.
She thought of Rev. Coates the night after the news of Jack broke out. She thought about how he took to walking when he couldn't sleep and decided perhaps she ought to do the same. But she didn't get any further beyond the back door of The Trader's Hotel. As she walked out the back door that night she caught Paul standing by the door with a backpack in one hand and a cigarette in the other.
"You smoke?" Pond looked surprised. She'd caught him off guard and he quickly dropped the cigarette and stepped on it with his foot.
"I know... It's such a terrible vice. I really shouldn't ..." Paul nervously apologized.
"It's alright." Pond chuckled. "I'm not going to arrest you for smoking."
Paul chuckled back, still a bit nervously. "I really am trying to quit though." He sighed. "I hate feeling so weak willed." He looked down at the squashed cigarette on the ground. "Becca tells me you're having trouble sleeping."
"What exactly are you doing here in the middle of the night talking with Becca Fisher?" Pond asked. "Please tell me I'm not catching you at the end of a late night hook up." Pond scoffed at the idea.
"What?! No... I.." The reverend went red with embarrassment at the accusation. "I was helping her manage her finances." Paul pulled out a folder full of tax documents. "If business doesn't pick up soon she could be facing foreclosure, poor thing."
"So you're an accountant, an IT specialist, and a vicar all in one. I'm impressed." Pond smiled.
"Yes, I'm very impressive, a real renaissance man." Paul joked.
"And you've got a good sense of humour as well." Pond added.
"I also play guitar." Paul winked.
"How does Becca keep her hands off of you when you're doing her books?" Pond chuckled.
"I don't think I'm her type." Paul's gaze drifted back to the ground.
"No, she prefers married men." Pond scoffed.
Paul paused for a moment. "She's made her mistakes, everyone has." He tried to stick up for his friend. "Can I ask what your nightmares are about?"
"You honestly want to know?" Pond asked and watched as Paul shook his head yes. "I dream about death." Pond replied coldly. "The death of my child to be more specific."
Paul stood silently looking out into the darkness of the small patch of woods behind The Trader's. He took a heavy sigh before continuing. "Have you thought about maybe seeing a bereavement counselor?"
"I don't want a counselor." Pond scoffed. "They'll tell me I need to let go of my anger but I need my anger, it's all I've got." She looked at Paul and his eyes were filled with concern for her. Pond's eyes went cold as she continued. "She was three weeks old in her crib when she died. What's worse is that I didn't even want her, I wanted an abortion. I should have had one."
"I'd have to disagree..." Paul got cut off.
"Yes, let's let the men decide what we should do with our bodies, right?" Pond grew angrier. "I hated it, that thing growing inside of me." Pond felt tears ushering forth with no way to pull them back. "But when I held her in my arms, I loved her and I knew it was my duty to protect her and I failed her."
"You didn't fail her, she was taken." Paul attempted to comfort her.
"Why?!" Pond was suddenly letting her emotions out. "Why does God create children and then take them back?!"
"I... I don't know.." Paul was holding back his own tears as he took Pond's hands in his. "I don't know the reasons why God does things the way he does. All I know is that this is the life we've been given and we have to accept that." Paul found himself drying the tears on Pond's face with his hands. "I wish I had an answer for you. I wish there was something more I could do to help."
"I don't need your help." Pond slowly backed away from Paul as she noticed her hands had ended up holding onto his sleeves as he stroked her cheek with his hand. This was beyond close, this was the opposite of what she wanted. She didn't want to want him.
"Right..." Paul snapped out of the embrace they'd found themselves in when Pond backed away from him. It was true that it wasn't proper for him to touch her in such an intimate way, but he only meant to comfort her. "It's ok if you don't want to talk right now but if you ever do... You know where to find me." Paul put his backpack up over his shoulder. "Sleep well, Pond."
"Vicar." She nodded goodbye as she watched him walked through the woods to his home at the bottom of the hill. Her heart began to skip at the mere thought of his hands caressing her face. She was falling far too deep to climb out and she feared the worst.
