Why Hinata shouldn't take advice from a Mistress

by: MikeJV37

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Author's Note: This is done purely for dark humor and is not part of any fic, including this series of 1-shots, it's totally separate and stands alone. I hope you enjoy. I don't own Naruto.

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===Afternoon, Hokage Tower===

(3 Months after the Chuunin Exams)

You wanted to see me Baa-chan." Naruto said as he stopped in front of Tsunade's desk.

Tsunade pushed a folder to the far side of her desk. "Sign these forms, since you're leaving with Jiraiya tomorrow morning I have 2 presents for you... but to get them you have to sign these to make it official."

Without a moment of thought Naruto took the pen from her desk opened the folder, signed the forms and slid it back to her..

Tsunade checked them, put them in her desk drawer, locked it, and pushed her intercom bottom. "Send her in Shizune."

A few moments later the door opened, Hinata walked in, shut the door and walked up to Naruto smiling. "He signed them?" Hinata asked.

"Hai." Tsunade said and gave Hinata a nod. "First... congratulations Naruto, you're now a Chuunin... like Hinata."

Naruto's jaw dropped.

Tsunade stood and walked around her desk to Naruto. "Second... congratulations Naruto and Hinata Uzumaki. I know you'll be a great husband Naruto."

"WHAT? What do you mean I'm married to Hinata?" Naruto asked in shock, looked back and forth between Tsunade and Hinata.

"I did it Naruto-kun." Hinata said, then Naruto turned to her. "I love you, I have since I was 6. In the last 3 months I've eliminated every rival I have for you." Hinata said, partially unzipped her coat and lifted out a necklace. Decorating it were over a dozen special 'jewels'.

"What do you mean... eliminated?" Naruto asked, then took a second, better look at Hinata's necklace. 'What are those pink things on your necklace?"

"If I may, Mistress Hinata?" Tsunade asked submissively, then Naruto turned to her. "You see Naruto,those aren't jewels on her necklace, they're..."

(Flashback)

===Yesterday, Late Afternoon===

"What do you want Hinata?" Tsunade asked tiredly, she'd finished all her paperwork for the day and was about to head home when Hinata arrived. As soon as she finished her question Hinata leapt onto her desk, totally catching her off guard, then before even she could react Hinata hands flashed out and she slumped in her chair, paralyzed. Tsunade couldn't believe she'd been caught off guard, she watched Hinata jump down to her left.

Tsunade was turned towards Hinata, then without a word her pants were unfastened then pulled down her legs to her ankles, then her legs were spread wide, fully exposing the thick blonde bush covering her mound above her large hairless pussy lips, her big, thick clit sticking out almost 2 inches as normal. She felt Hinata's hands touching her, and felt chakra enter her body. She was confused a moment, then felt it... she was getting aroused.

A few moments later Tsunade knew her clit had been forced to full erection. She heard the soft clink of metal on metal, then Hinata held up a medical blade. Her eyes opened wide, she tried to scream, but couldn't. She felt the pressure and movement, and was glad that there was no pain... that was meaningless however as she heard Hinata rummaging through her pouch again, then a few moments later did a jutsu, whispering the name

Tsunade's heart sank a moment later when Hinata held it up.

(End Flashback)

So that big one in the middle is..." Naruto said, still shocked.

""My preserved, erect clit... she cut it off, and there's nothing I can do medically. Hinata de-clitted and broke me... I'm her sexless slave. And yes, the rest are clits too " Tsunade said sadly.

"This one is Sakura's, Ino's, Tenten's, Shizune's, Anko's, Kurenai's, Ayame's..." Hinata said, pointing to each.

Naruto listened as Hinata pointed to each one, and named every girl and woman he knew, every girl from his classes at the Academy, to the mothers of all his friends. He was amazed Hinata could do this... even her sister Hanabi and mother Hannah weren't safe.

"That just leaves me Naruto-kun... I eliminated every possible rival, so now we're married, and I'm going with you to train, and together we'll be stronger than everyone... and when we get back all our enemies will be dead, We'll be promoted to Jonin and then you'll become the Sixth Hokage!" Hinata said happily.

"Um... okay." Naruto said, scared and impressed at the same time.

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End