Cal Lightman had never felt so helpless in his life. Seeing her standing at the end of that hall, looking so small and fragile. He felt like it took an eternity to reach her. Gillian, his Gillian covered in blood and traumatised. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close desperately wanting to take away her pain. At that moment the case took on a whole new level. Sod truth and justice, now it was revenge. Someone had hurt Gillian and that's when things got ugly. She was his life and anyone messing with that had better pray because this just got personal.
Waiting for Wallowski the irony was not lost on Cal as to how his and Gillian's roles had reversed. He fussed and fretted over her while she brooded and became surly. If it hadn't been in the middle of a crisis, Cal may have had more time to consider how perfect for each other this made them, taking on the others role so easily.
He watched her as she gave her statement at the police station and the feeling of helplessness returned. Her distress tore at his heart and made him feel useless until she turned to him and said
"…and then I called you."
The way she looked at him brought the fight rushing back into Cal. So certain, so trusting. All of her faith was in him and there was no way he was going to let her down. He would make Zack pay. His instincts wanted him to find Zack and beat him until he confessed but he knew that would never stand up in court. He knew he had to trick him into revealing his role in Claire's death, but he also knew he needed help with that. He was torn. He wanted to take Gillian home and wrap her cotton wool and protect her from the world. At the same time he was so proud when she refused to shrink back and he marvelled at her seemingly never ending reserve of inner strength.
Although they didn't get an outright confession they still got enough to get Zack charged and the plan Cal hatched to make him pay satisfied Gillian and therefore his need for revenge. In her office later Cal took her in his arms, silently telling her to lean on him. He wasn't sure how long they sat like that but it was getting dark. Occasionally Gillian had spoken, sharing memories of Claire but mostly they'd sat in silence just holding on to each other. Every now and again one of the staff would poke their worried head around the door but Cal would just wave them away. As the light in the room faded Cal knew his window of opportunity was fading with it. He wanted to see Zack, to ensure he knew how they intended to make him pay. Cal could feel his darker impulses rising in his chest until Gillian stirred in his arms. He kissed the top of her head.
"Come on luv." He said moving to stand up. He held out his hand and helped her from the couch.
"Let's get you home and into a nice hot bath."
Gillian managed a half smile and stepped into his arms.
"Thank you." She mumbled into his chest.
Cal squeezed her tighter glad of any small way he could make her feel better.
He stayed with her while she bathed and helped her into bed insisting she rest. Her exhausted body fighting with her emotional brain until she final succumbed to sleep. Cal watched her for a few moments. At rest she looked so innocent and that familiar pang of guilt resurfaced when he thought of everything she had been through. Not just tonight but over the years he had known her. She'd survived an alcoholic father, infertility, the loss of her child, the breakdown of her marriage. She'd been attacked, threatened, beaten and emotionally wounded not least by Cal himself. But amazingly she had come through it all and more importantly was still by his side. He kissed her and ran his hand down her cheek. First he would take care of Zack and when he got back he would make sure she knew just how much she meant to him.
When he returned from the prison he checked on Gillian but she was still asleep. He went back downstairs to find a glum looking Emily. Discovering the reason for her sadness Cal had to admit to himself that she was no longer a child, no matter how much he wished for it, but a mature young woman with a very sensible head on her shoulders. She was also very much her father's daughter, probing for information that ordinarily wouldn't be forthcoming.
"I have a question."
"What's that look mean?"
"Gillian….do you love her?"
"Course I do darlin. Course I love her."
"No I mean really love her?"
"Yeah."
"Well then what are you waiting for?"
"I don't have an answer for that one luv."
He pulled his daughter into a hug and held her tightly. What was he waiting for? He had so many answers for that question, so many excuses, but the more he thought the more insignificant they became.
Emily's words lingered in his head as he climbed the stairs to bed. When he entered the bedroom Gillian stirred and began to wake. Cal removed his clothes and climbed into bed wrapping himself around her.
"Shh. It's ok. Everything's alright. Go back to sleep." He soothed.
"What time is it?" she asked sleepily rolling over to face him.
"Late." He answered.
He watched her for a moment wondering if now was the right time. She was definitely awake enough for a serious conversation but emotionally she probably wasn't in the best state of mind. There was also a glint in her eye that Cal wasn't about to ignore. He completely understood her desire. He'd felt it many times before. Being close to death gave you the need to feel alive. She reached out her hand and scratched at the stubble along his jaw. Moving lower she traced the skin on his chest and down his torso. Cal groaned as she reached her intended destination, stroking and caressing. Leaving one hand where it was with the other she pulled his face to hers kissing him desperately. Her legs clutched at his tangling herself around him. Still entwined she pushed him on to his back and positioned her body over his. She nuzzled her face into his neck kissing and nipping at the skin leaving behind tell-tale purple marks. He surrendered to her completely, giving her exactly what she needed. Their love making was fast and frenzied confirming to both of them that they were very much alive and in each other's arms.
