Sweet Caroline
Chapter 9 - "A Bitter Pill To Swallow"
The image of Tim lying dead, his brains spread on a wall, was the only thing Caroline could see. Her tears stinging her eyes as she ran. She had to put some distance between her and Raylan. Caroline couldn't understand how Raylan could kill Tim, shoot his own twin in cold blood.
The pasture seemed to get smaller as Caroline got closer to the edge of Hershel's property. Her lungs burned as badly as her calves. The night seemed to swirl all around her. A spinning sensation surged through her head, the very spot she stood on looked as if it was moving. Caroline crumples to the ground, wailing into her arms.
Raylan walks into the house, heading straight for Daryl's room. Rick gives Raylan a quick look and follows him down the hallway. Raylan flings the door open, jarring Daryl from his sleep. "Sorry about this Daryl but you gotta come with me."
Daryl rolls over, giving Raylan a very dirty look. "What the hell? Who are you and why the hell do I have to come anywhere with you?"
Rick places a hand on Daryl's shoulder. "This is Caroline's brother Raylan. He just got back today. We've really not had time for introductions, informalities aside, Raylan needs your help."
Daryl tries to lift himself out of the bed, his side still screaming with pain. "Caroline told me all about you. Good to put a face to the name."
Raylan takes a seat next to the bed, his arms perched on his knees. "I'm just gonna spit this out Daryl. After talking to Caroline today, I can tell you mean a lot to her. We'll discuss you gettin with my sister later but for now I need you to go find her for me."
Daryl draws his brow together, not sure how to take Raylan. "Go get her, ain't she outside? Did Shane do something to her...that son of a bitch...I'll kill that prick."
Raylan waves his hands at Daryl. "No..no...nothing like that. I had to tell Caroline about Tim, I had to tell her I killed him. When I found him he was bit and he asked me to kill him before he turned. Tim didn't want to become one of those things. She didn't take the news so well and knowing Caroline like I do, she's out there, running from her pain. I know she'll never listen to me, you on the other hand, you can talk some sense into her."
Daryl scratches his head, taking in everything Raylan just told him. "The Caroline I know could take that, she ain't some flower, she's strong. She just took off when you told her about Tim? I don't know how I can help. I just met your sister, what is it you think I can do?"
Raylan pinches the bridge of his nose with his fingers. "Daryl can't you tell you shared something with Caroline, something that means a lot to her. If you can't see that, well boy you're blind. My sister doesn't fall easy and I'll be damned if she didn't just jump off the cliff when she met you. If you can sit there and say she doesn't mean anything to you, then I'll leave you be."
Daryl stares at Rick, not knowing what to say next. "I like your sister but it ain't like we're gettin hitched or anythang."
Raylan sits back in the chair, taking a deep breathe. He's just about to say something when Rick interrupts.
"Daryl, I've known you for a while now and I can say with some certainty that you like this girl. I'd even go so far as to say, you feel something for this girl. With that being said, I think you need to get up and go find her. You're gonna regret it if you stay here and a walker gets her."
Rick's blue eyes look right through Daryl, making him feel more than a little uncomfortable.
Daryl tries to stand, Rick giving him some support. "I got this." Daryl's disposition is more than surly.
Rick looks at Raylan, motioning his head towards the hallway. The two men walk out of the room, giving Daryl some space.
"Raylan, I think the best thing you can do is stay here. I'll go with Daryl and look for Caroline. If she sees you coming she's just gonna run again. If you don't care, just stay around here, help protect the camp." Rick pats Raylan on the back, walking back into the bedroom.
Caroline lifts her eyes, gazing up at the moon. Her heart beating so hard she's sure it's going to stop. Her mind is a flurry of thoughts. She goes from Raylan betraying her, to Tim swearing he was coming back too. "Liars!" Caroline just screams to the moon.
The tall grass covers her, hiding her from the world. She just wanted to disappear, to not hurt anymore. Just how stupid could she be, to think Damon dying was the last heartache she would face. Just this afternoon, the thoughts of losing Daryl scared her to death.
"Daryl...oh Daryl." Caroline can't believe she just ran off like that. She ran without even thinking of him. Facing Raylan wasn't something she really wanted to do right now but she had to get back to Daryl.
What was she really running from? The pain of losing Tim or the pain that she might, someday, lose Daryl. She still had three brothers out there, Dean, Samuel and Lucas. Three brothers that she may never see again. The one thing that she knew for sure, she still had one brother that was very much here and very much loved her.
Raylan had always been her rock. When life got too much, Raylan was always there. She wasn't sure how she could turn to him now, seeing how he's the cause of her pain. Running from him like that wasn't something a grown women does. Being around Raylan made her feel 16 again, made her feel like his little sister.
The grass parted as she raised up, the farm house sitting in the distance. She starts her walk back, back to face Raylan, back to her Daryl. For the first time since she ran away, she thought of the walkers. One could be out her with her, it could even be waiting in the tall grass.
The thumping in her chest returns, albeit for a different reason. You're a damn fool, that was her only thought. A dead damn fool, that was the next thing that came screaming at her. She could fight off any walker that crossed her patch but without a weapon that was going to be difficult. Dead stubborn damn fool, she could almost kick herself.
Death by walker, that was what her headstone would say. Her body jerked to a stop. The fuzziness finally clearing from her mind. "Death by walker, damn." She gazes out towards the farm house.
A walker just doesn't kill you, they eat you, then turn you. "Stupid!" Caroline had a good conversation with herself. At times, it sounded like she had someone in the pasture with her.
Blazing anger turns into sympathy. Raylan had to kill Tim, cause there was no way Tim would or could become some mindless cannibal. Raylan did the only thing a loving brother could...end his suffering.
The tears come pouring down again. Caroline more angry at herself than anything. She hated crying but she hated fighting with Raylan more. Facing the truth wasn't one of her strong points. Thus, why she ran off to the cabin when Damon died. Caroline's flaws smack her right in the face. "Time to go face the firing squad."
With half of the pasture behind her, she hears movement in front of her. She squats down, probing the darkness for her sound. More rustling comes from a few feet in front of her. Caroline knows this is it. She has to either run for it or face it. Slowly she raises back up, Rick and Daryl walking towards her.
Rick standing real close to Daryl, making sure he doesn't fall over. Daryl walking gingerly to her.
"Are you crazy or somethin gurl? What you tryin to prove?" Daryl's disposition not much better than before.
Caroline can't believe what she's hearing. Daryl is pissed at her and for what. Her mind couldn't wrap around the concept of Daryl being mad at her.
Daryl stands there looking at her, waiting for an answer. "You gonna say somethin or just stand there lookin at me?"
Caroline does the only thing she can think of. She embraces Daryl hard, her tears falling from her cheeks to his shoulder. Here he was, stitched up, bloody and bruised, yet he come out here to find her.
"I'm sorry." That is all her trembling voice is able to get out. Her body aching to just cry, really cry. She just stands there, her arms wrapped around him.
"Caroline...just stop your cryin and come on back." Daryl's voice less harsh than before.
Caroline raises her head, looking into the fathomless blue of his eyes.
"Daryl, why are you out here? I'm sorry if Raylan sent you after me."
Daryl strokes her hair, his heart starting to hurt for her.
"I ain't that hurt and besides you ran off without a weapon. Raylan was just worried about ya. I know you're smarter than that. We best be getting back, not what ya'd call safe out here."
The trio walk toward the house, Rick and Daryl staring at Caroline the entire walk back. Rick could see the sorrow hanging off of her, he'd seen that look from his wife. He watched Daryl watch Caroline, he'd gave that same look to his wife too. Daryl was one tough man, didn't want or need help from anyone. Caroline, well that's a different story. She opened parts of Daryl up that had never been opened before.
The silent walk gave Caroline time to think. She knew she'd always be mad at Raylan for killing Tim but she'd always love him more.
They got to the campsite, Raylan setting by the fire pit. The amber flames flicking a small light on Raylan's worried face.
"Thanks Rick, Daryl." Raylan walks toward Caroline, wanting to hold his little sister and make it all better.
Caroline walks past him, following Daryl into a tent. Rick helps Daryl down on a cot, leaving them to talk.
"I know you're mad at me. I know what I did was stupid, real stupid. You'll never know how sorry I am you came out there to get me. Daryl, I just wasn't thinking." Caroline's throat goes dry, her tongue trying to find moisture for her lips.
Daryl lays down on the cot, bending one leg up. "Stupid...that's one way to put it. I don't get it. I thought you were the kinda woman that took her lumps. If that had been me, I'd slugged Raylan and been done with it. Women."
Caroline sits down by the cot, crossing her legs over. "Women...great. I'm not some girl that needs saving Daryl Dixon. I just let my emotions get the best of me. I know that I didn't make the best choice but I was coming back when you found me. I'll deal with my brother in my own way, in my own time. I'm not sure what happened to you but I'm sorry someone broke you. Is it that hard for you to give a damn?"
Caroline collects herself from the dirt anger and sadness consuming her. She feels a hand take hers, the fingers lacing into hers.
"Don't go. Just sit with me a while." A pair of the bluest eyes looking back at her.
Daryl moves over, giving her some room to sit on the cot. Caroline can see the campfire from here, the sound of people talking, the night not so scary anymore.
"Daryl, my heart is just so tired of breaking. I'm tired of breaking. This world is too much sometimes. The only good thing to happen to me in a very long time is finding you. Raylan coming home is bitter sweet, but at least I have my brother back." The tent goes silent, she lays her head down on Daryl's chest.
"I know you're hurtin Caroline, running won't stop the hurt. Your brother did the right thang. Hell...I'd shoot Merle if I had to. You just got to face the pain that's killin you inside and not let it have you. Just say you ain't never gonna do that again...promise me."
Caroline grins slightly, hoping this is Daryl's way of forgiving her. "Promise."
Her hands run down his side, under his unbutton shirt. She can feel the bandage on his side, wondering how he did it. Pulling an arrow out of his own body, climbing back up that ravine, killing those walkers injured. Daryl just took her breath away.
Heavy eyes start to win their battle, as she cuddles up to Daryl. She can feel a kiss on the top of her head as fingertips running up and down her arm. The lull of Daryl's heart beats at her, making sleep come all the faster.
Raylan pokes his head in the tent, finding his little sister asleep in Daryl's arms. "She out?"
Daryl nods his head, fingering her hair out of her face. "Yeah, just went out."
Raylan smiles at Daryl, giving his approval. "You're good for her, you know that?"
Daryl closes his eyes, smelling the sweet summer scent of her hair. "I don't know about that Raylan. I just know I ain't lettin her out of my site again."
"I know my news was a bitter pill to swallow, someday she'll forgive me." Raylan starts to back out of the tent.
"She already does...Caroline is better than the both of us." Daryl pulls her closer to him. He didn't know when it happened but this girl in his arms was important to him. So important he'd kill for her, die for her.
~~~ 000 ~~~
Author Note: I have to give a big thank you to my beta. She is the reason I'm writing and posting. Without her...none of this is possible. Thanks !
