Sheldon spent all day Sunday going back and forth between his desk and his bedroom, pacing and typing on his laptop. He seemed completely absorbed in whatever he was doing, and since he also seemed to be in a good mood, Leonard and Penny left him alone. They took advantage of the go-ahead from the doctor and took a walk around the block, then had lunch in Old Pasadena. It was their first real day out since Barstow.
When they returned to the apartment, Sheldon was still at his laptop. He looked up as they walked in. "I think I have it all figured out."
"What's that?" Leonard asked.
"How to get things to work with Amy."
"Great," Leonard said, trying to muster enthusiasm, but secretly concerned about one of Sheldon's schemes. "Wanna tell me about it?"
"Not a chance. This is between me and Amy. If it works, I'll let you know. Now I have to text Amy to set up a meeting tomorrow evening."
Monday morning, before Leonard woke up, Penny took a deep breath and called her agent back. They had a long conversation. The production company was seriously interested in their story, and in Penny playing herself in it. They wanted to meet, and understood the constraints. But they wanted to meet within a couple of weeks. The agent urged Penny to agree: he felt that a few meetings could allow him to seal the deal, but that waiting too long was a mistake. With some reluctance, Penny suggested a few dates, two or three weeks away. And she told him that she'd be willing to read for Kevin Smith, but again not for a few weeks.
After the call was over, Penny started to allow herself to get excited about the prospect. This really seemed like a possibility. True, it was trading a little on a terrible experience that she wished had never happened, but, well, when you have lemons, and clouds with silver linings, and all that.
When Leonard woke up, Penny told him about the phone call. Leonard was ecstatic, and his enthusiasm wore off a little on Penny. The two of them spent a couple of hours talking about the possibility of a TV movie – who could play Leonard? Who could play Officer Lopez? – and about whether Kevin Smith was really going to be able to pull off Clerks III. And they also circled back to speculate about whether they might get money from the FBI, and what they might do with it. Leonard's dream of a house in Altadena was sounding more and more realistic.
That evening, Amy met Sheldon at a coffee shop near the apartment, for mint tea and the agreed-upon thirty-minute meeting that Sheldon had requested.
"How are you, Amy?" he began.
"I'm all right," she responded warily. "You said you had an idea?"
"Yes, and I think it's a really good one."
"Go on," Amy said cautiously.
"We're both scientists. So I thought we could approach this in a scientific manner. You can give me a course in Amy Farrah Fowler 101. That is, we could meet for, say, 30 minutes at a time. In each class you could present an aspect of what you'd like to see in our relationship. Or anything else that you think would be helpful. Not to complain or criticize, just to tell me what you like and what you're looking for. And that way I can perform my own analysis and try to act accordingly."
Amy looked thoughtful. "Sheldon, I think that's an excellent idea. I'll try to think about how to explain my point of view to you in small doses. Perhaps we could meet a couple of times a week for half an hour, just to do this – not a date, a class, as you put it. Is that what you have in mind?"
"Yes. We could still do date night, if you want. Or this could be instead of date night," he added hopefully.
"In addition, not instead. At least for now. Sheldon, I'm impressed. This is a really good idea. It's imaginative, and it shows a true interest in my feelings. Thank you for suggesting it."
"Actually, it came out of a conversation I had with Stephen J. Hawking."
"You're kidding. You talked to Professor Hawking about our relationship?" Amy was stunned.
"Actually, Howard set it up. He knows Hawking from repairing his wheelchair or something. Anyway, Professor Hawking suggested that I try to let you teach me about what you want. So I figured this was a way to do it we could both be comfortable with."
They made a date to meet that Thursday at the coffee shop, for the first attempt.
Thursday at 8 PM they began, mint teas in hand.
"OK, Amy, I'm ready for my first lesson in AFF 101," Sheldon said. He even had a notebook and a pen at the ready.
"All right, Sheldon. Class is called to order. I thought I would start with things about my childhood that might help you understand where I'm coming from."
"OK. Early childhood, very psycho-dynamic."
"Whatever. Anyway, when I was seven or eight I wanted to be like all the other girls. But my mother was very protective – over-protective. And she had no fashion sense, so I was always dressed really badly. You know, little girls can be very cruel. And they made fun of me all the time, saying I was ugly and that my clothes were ugly. I would come home and cry to my mother, asking for nicer clothes and a nicer haircut. But she always refused. In her view, all that looking prettier would do was attract the wrong kind of people."
"What kind of people?" Sheldon asked.
"I think she had some idea that over-sexed eight-year-old boys were going to attack me. She was always obsessed with sex, always in a negative way. Anyway, she told me many times that I was lucky I wasn't pretty, because that way I could concentrate on studying and working and didn't have to worry about boys."
"That's not true!" Sheldon said, sincerely. "You're very pretty!"
"Thank you, Sheldon," Amy smiled. "That's lovely. But, you see, I never heard anything like that when I was growing up. And it hurt all the time. It didn't just hurt when other kids were mean to me. It hurt because eventually I came to believe what my mother told me, that I wasn't pretty and that being smart was better than being pretty. So in my mind, since I was convinced that I could never be attractive, I concentrated on being smart. That was a lot easier."
Sheldon looked pained. "You had a mean mother. I'm glad my mother was nice."
"Your mother is very nice, Sheldon. She may have some strange beliefs, but she really knew how to deal with you in a way that made you feel good about yourself. But mine didn't, so I really never felt that good about myself. Except in my studies, which was great and all that."
"I guess here's the point of the first lecture. I've gotten over the way my mother treated me. But I still feel that I was put down and unappreciated. I want to be appreciated. I think everybody wants to feel appreciated, and I'm no exception. So it is nice to know that you find me attractive. But looks aren't everything. It would be nice if you could show that you appreciate me on other dimensions as well – my mind, my ideas, my work. That would make me feel wanted, and it would make me feel that you were glad to be with me."
Sheldon looked at her seriously. "Of course I am glad to be with you. I suppose what this lesson is about is making that more explicit. And I can do that. At least I can try."
"Thank you, Sheldon. And I think that's enough for now. You can look over your notes and study up for the quiz."
"Quiz?" Sheldon said, surprised.
"I'm kidding, silly," Amy laughed. "The test will be how we get along. No paper quiz, just life."
"Oh. So did you think this was a good start?"
"I thought so," Amy replied. "But the big question is whether you find sessions like this useful for you. Did you?"
"I think so. We'll have to wait for the test, though, I guess."
Over the next week, they met two more times, and each time Amy gave Sheldon another little insight into her background and desires. She was somewhat surprised to see that Sheldon really seemed to be hearing her – he certainly took copious notes – and, with something of a struggle, appeared to understand the principal points. To everyone's relief, none of the meetings ended in recriminations. Sheldon was listening better, and Amy was taking things slow. It seemed they might be on track.
