The Spy Who Came In From the Cold
By
Mystical Witch
Chapter 9: "Have Credit Card, Will Spend. "
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters from the Harry Potter Series. They are owned by J.K. Rowlings, Scholastic Publishing, Warner Bros, et al... If you find elements in this story that is similar to other peoples' stories, that is a coincidence.
This story is dedicated to all those men and women who serve their countries in the cause of freedom by using the ancient art of espionage and secrecy.
Kudos to everyone who can spot the Monty Python references. For there will be many.
Muggle London was a reassuring sight to Katherine Cross. The sights, the smells, the sounds were all comforting to her, especially after a time away from it. As she stepped into the street outside of The Leaky Cauldron, she knew she was back in her own environment. This was her world, and 'here' she was the expert. She knew exactly how to get what she wanted done. Just as her old confidence in her senses was returning, she looked back towards The Leaky Cauldron. It was gone. She only saw 2 bookstores, side by side. "What the fuck?" She exclaimed. "Where did it go?"
"Where did what go? The Cauldron?" Remus asked. "It's still there, just shielded from Muggle eyes. That's why I'm with you. I can see it, when you can't."
"I forgot. I was so caught up with being in the normal world, that I had forgotten the spells your kind places on things." Kate recalled as she started down Charing Cross Road. "Remind me to go into those book stores before we return to the Cauldron. There are a few books I need to get."
"Such as?" Remus inquired while wondering what books would she need at Hogwarts.
"A few texts on Psychology, books on teen-agers, and a couple of books on electronics for one." Kate rationalized. "I plan on sending the latter to Mr. Weasley."
"Arthur Weasley? When did you meet him?" Remus asked as he took her arm.
"He met me at the airport the day I arrived. He was so interested in my pen, and asked me about a hundred questions on..."
"Let me guess, electricity." Remus answered for her. They both had a good laugh as they walked down the street.
People didn't really notice them as they journeyed down Charing Cross Road. They looked and acted as a couple of friends out walking their dog (who by the way wasn't on a leash). After a few blocks they stopped in front of a pet store, Remus opened the door and they went in.
It was your usual pet supply store. There were leashes and collars, dog toys and treats. There was a corner where a dog groomer was working and a couple of aisles dedicated to cats, fish and birds. There were a number of cages of all sizes and even a group of white mice. A couple of aquariums were filled with snakes and lizards. Kate ignored all of the toys and food and headed straight for the collars and leashes. She selected a chain choke collar and a chain leash with a leather strap. It wasn't a heavy chain, but it wasn't light either. She knew that it would put Black in his place concerning her. And if that didn't do it, she knew just what might. She headed over to the cashier and placed the collar and leash down on it. "That'll be 8 pounds, 10." The cashier announced.
Kate handed her a 10 pound note. "How does one make an appointment with the dog groomer?"
The cashier looked at Snuffles. "She's busy today."
"Not for today. He's too busy." Kate absentmindedly said. "Sometime next week I believe."
"She's busy then too." The cashier informed her as she handed her the change and receipt.
Kate pocketed both in her purse then bent down towards Snuffles. "I hate to do this Snuffles, but London has leash laws." She said as she slipped the collar around his neck. She then attached the leash to the collar and turned to walk out. Snuffles just sat down, being stubborn and headstrong about wearing a collar and leash. Suddenly Kate jerked the chain. The collar closed around Snuffles neck, nearly choking him. "Bad dog! Bad Snuffles!" She barked. "Now come Snuffles." Snuffles just sat there choking. Kate jerked the chain once more and Snuffles leapt to his feet and started out the door with her. The choking stopped. She bent down to examine his neck. "You will learn the collar, or else." She said with an icy voice.
Snuffles growled something that sounded a lot like, "Bitch!"
Kate just smiled at Remus, "One must be firm with a dog. Let them know that you are the master. Otherwise they will walk all over you." The trio continued down the street.
"What exactly are you looking for?" Remus asked her a short time later as he noticing her checking the stores.
"An Internet cafe."
"A what?" Remus asked. "What type of drink is an Internet?"
Kate laughed, "The Internet is a computer thing. They now have coffee shops in which you can rent computer time while having a cup of coffee. I need to download some information and make reservations for us. I can do that on-line faster than by phone."
"And this Internet thingy is capable of understanding your words?" Remus uttered. "How?"
"The computer can understand the words I type. All I need is access to the net."
"I don't understand. What is a net? Are we going fishing?"
"Remus, I can't fully explain the Internet or Net as it is called now. I'll buy you a book on it and you can read all about it. You'd better get used to it. I have a feeling that you and other wizards and witches will be using it after I'm through." Kate said, as they turned into the cafe she had been looking for.
A few hours and many cups of cappuccino later, Kate rose up from the computer she had been sitting at. Remus sat opposite her, asking question after question, trying her patience as she tried to work at the computer and answer him. "You are almost as bad as Arthur Weasley!" She remarked on more than one occasion. On the other hand Snuffles curled up under her feet looking very disconsolate. Every once and a while someone would come up to her and ask to pet her sad dog. Snuffles was a very good dog. He received numerous cakes and cookies, someone gave him a bowl of coffee and a little boy even gave him a lick of his ice cream cone. If Snuffles was a normal dog, he either would be very sick or very happy or both.
"Finished!" Kate announced. "I've gotten us a room in a small hotel in London. It won't be ready for us for a few days, which fit in very nicely with our schedule. Now to get some other things done so we can easily move about London."
"Such as?" Remus asked, not really wanting to know the answer.
"Some decent clothing for you for one." Kate announced. "I understand why you guys like to dress like that, but what you are wearing?"
"What's wrong with it?" Remus asked looking down at his clothes. "It's clean."
"At least it's that." Kate commented as she ushered him into a men's clothes store.
"We don't allow dogs in here Ma'am." A salesman told her.
Kate went outside and wrapped the leash around a pole, then took the clasp and fastened it to the leash and collar. "Just wait here, we won't be too long." She went back into the store.
After a brief chat with the salesman she motioned Remus to join them. "Don't worry he won't hurt you, and this is on my expense account." she reassured him. Remus smiled at her as the salesman took him into a fitting room and proceeded to outfit him. Remus had a look of absolute horror upon his face as he entered the room.
A short time later Kate entered the room with her arms full of all sorts of clothing, "I thought these might look good on you." Remus blushed for he was only clad in his underwear. Kate ignored the blush and made a mental note to also purchase him some new ones. "Do you prefer boxers or briefs?" She inquired nonchalantly. Remus muttered, "Whatever." as he hastily reached for a pair of pants.
Kate smiled to herself as she retreated from the fitting room. Remus was a very handsome man. Although he didn't look it, he was well-built and quite good-looking. She wondered why he didn't dress to exhibit the fine body he had. 'I wonder if being a werewolf has anything to do with it?' she thought as she gathered even more clothing. She brought them into the fitting room. "I'll be outside with Snuffles for a while. After you try all of these on, get me and I'll pay." Remus nodded while trying to manage a tie. The salesman grinned at her as she left. "What do I have to do to get a good-looking woman to buy me a new wardrobe?"
After the men's store, they headed towards the Cauldron. Along the way Kate stopped at a drugstore and purchased a few items. Since Remus was outside with Snuffles, he didn't notice what they were. As they neared the Cauldron, Kate entered one of the bookstores. She emerged with a large bag of books and they finally entered the Cauldron and plopped down at one of the tables. After a large lunch, they returned up to their rooms to stow their packages away.
Kate knocked on the door that connected both of the rooms. Remus opened it and Kate walked in carrying a book and a camera. She tossed the book at Remus, "This is for you." He glanced at the cover "The Internet for Dummies" was the title. "And you." she pointed at Snuffles who quickly changed shape. "That's better." She showed him a camera. "Get out of those robes and into a shirt." she ordered him.
"Why?" Sirius demanded. "After that torture device you call a collar? I should wring your neck!"
"Why? Because I'm gonna take your picture you idiot! And I don't want you in robes!" she decreed.
"What for?" Sirius said as he removed his robes. Unfortunately he was quite nude underneath.
"Never you mind." She said as she looked at him. For a man on the run he was in pretty good shape. A little on the thin side, but nothing that a couple or twenty good meals couldn't fix up. "Remus lend him a pair of underwear and a shirt would you?"
"What? No nude pictures?" Sirius blurted out. "Are you sure about that?"
"Positive." she answered dryly. "No nudes. And shave will you. I want this to look presentable."
Now she did have Sirius worried. "I want to know exactly what you are gonna do with these pictures!" he demanded of her, grabbing her arm at the same time.
With lightening speed Kate had twirled around pinning Sirius down on the ground with his own arm, which felt like it was about to break in two. "If you must know, I'm gonna contact someone I know and get you a new identity and identification. There will be times that you can't be a dog. So with a new identity you can travel in Muggle London in human form." She released his arm.
"Oh." Sirius nursed his hurt arm as she made him pose and took a few waist up shots. "Remind me to get him some new clothing too." she asked Remus, who nodded in agreement.
The next day Kate left The Leaky Cauldron alone. She said that she would be back before five that evening, so someone (Remus that is) would have to meet her outside. Remus watched her leave the Cauldron, turn right onto the street and hail a taxi. He returned back to the room he shared with Snuffles/Sirius. Kate left a note asking if Remus would owl post a letter to Washington DC for her. Remus poked a sleeping Snuffles trying to awaken the sleeping dog.
"What?"
"I'm going to Diagon Alley, want to join me?" Remus asked.
"What for?" Snuffles looked around. "Where's her Highness?"
"Kate went into London. We'll meet her back here at 5. She wants me to owl post a letter for her. And I want to get some things there." Remus remarked.
"Ah! Freedom for a little while!" Snuffles whooped. "When the cat's away we mice will play." Remus smiled at the dog jumping for joy. "That woman takes things too seriously!"
"And you never take anything seriously?" Remus asked back. "She is just trying to show us that she's a professional. Plus the Muggle world is her world and not ours. In it, she's the expert."
"Why are you taking her side?" Snuffles asked. "After that torture device called a collar and leash that she demanded I wear..."
"I thought you looked very handsome in it myself." Remus laughed. "She does know how to keep you in your place."
"And that is?" Snuffles growled.
"At her feet, obedient to her will." Remus laughed while heading out the door.
At 5 that evening Remus and Snuffles waited outside the Cauldron for Kate. She was late and the two men were getting worried. They waited over an hour for her to show up, wondering what they were going to tell Dumbledore when they meet him again. They were about to enter the Cauldron when they saw her walking down the street towards them. At least they thought it was her. She was dressed in a red business suit, high heel shoes and carrying so many packages, that she looked like a walking bundle of goods.
"What did you buy?" Remus asked as he took most of the bags and bundles from her.
"Clothes, books, necessaries." she absentmindedly answered. Remus very cautiously held the door to the cauldron open as she entered. The main room was busy as usual but she motioned the duo to follow her back upstairs. "Did you post that letter for me?"
"Of course. Plus did some shopping ourselves too." Remus smiled as he entered his room with Snuffles following along.
Kate smiled at the men, "Do you think you could change?"
Snuffles changed into Sirius stretching his body as he did so. "That feels better. I think I was starting to get fleas."
"There are shampoos for that." she dryly remarked as she tossed him a couple of packages.
Sirius opened them to find pants, a shirt, underwear, socks and a pair of shoes. He placed the shirt up against his chest. "You know that this not my style or color."
"Remus can you change his hair color?" Kate said ignoring Sirius.
"Sure, to what?"
Kate held out a British passport opened to a picture. "Blond. Make it look like this. Can you do eye color too?"
Remus waved his wand and Sirius' black hair became blond. His brown eyes became blue, and he looked a lot different than he did before. "All done!" Remus said as he gave Sirius a good look. "Not bad. You can't really notice him unless you look very carefully."
"Take a quick shower, then dress. We're going out on the town tonight." Kate ordered as she gathered up her packages and headed towards the connecting room. "Oh and Sirius, do be a dear and shave."
"That woman!" Sirius shouted. "What gives her the right to order me about?"
Remus laughed as he headed towards the shower. "I thought you wanted a night out on the town? Changing your mind?"
Later Kate knocked on their door and tentatively opened it. "Are you guys decent?"
"Nope, but we are dressed." Sirius replied, grinning and looking like a new man.
Kate gathered the collar and leash, "Just in case." She explained, handed Sirius a pair of dark sunglasses. "You should get used to wearing these." He placed them on. Then Kate handed him the passport. "Your new name is Stephen Goodwin. Inside you will find a driver's license, credit cards (don't go hog wild with them, they are stolen), and some pictures of family. Place the cards and license in the wallet I got you, the passport can go inside your jacket pocket, and let's go."
"How did..."
"A friend of mine in intelligence." Kate explained as they left the room. The trio headed down the stairs, out the door into the Muggle world.
Once outside Kate led them down the street to the Tube station. The station wasn't very crowded so Kate started to explain who Stephen Goodwin was. "You are a graduate of Smeltings and Cambridge. You recently help start a an Internet company. Are you listening?"
"Yeah." Sirius said not really doing so.
"Listen Black this is not a game!" she hissed into his ear. "I went through a lot of trouble getting you this identity. It cost me a lot. So pay attention. This is not a game!"
"Ok. Don't be so bitchy. Are you on the rag or something?" Sirius whispered back.
Before she could answer, a train pulled in. "Our train. Tonight we are going to have some decent food. Not that your English food isn't good, but I just can't stomach some of it."
"So what are we eating tonight?" Sirius asked. "Pizza?"
"You'll see." Kate said with a sneaky smile.
Kate studied her map of London while the two men were having an animated conversation about Gryffindor's chance to win both the House Cup and their Quidditch teams chances. Kate examined the two men fully. They both were of the same age, but as prison hadn't really aged Sirius, Remus looked older than his age. She surmised that it had to be something to do with his transformations every month. She looked up at the car pulling into a station, rose and headed for the door. "Are you gentlemen coming, or are you gonna ride the train all night?"
As they departed the train they followed Kate down a few streets and into a Sushi bar. "Now this is what I call decent food." she announced.
"What is Sushi?" Remus whispered to Sirius who just shrugged.
The restaurant was crowded and it took a while for the trio to be seated. "I figure that after here we can go to a couple of clubs I know of." Kate announced as they finally were seated.
"Psst, Remus. All they have on the menu is fish." Sirius said. Then turned to Kate. "What exactly is Sushi?"
"Raw fish."
"Raw fish?" The two men chorused. "Why would anyone ever eat raw fish?"
"Just try it. It's quite good. I'll order for us." She said as she turned to the waiter. The order sounded so alien to the men. "I ordered us a sort of sampler of Sushi and Sashimi. A variety of fish and shellfish. Plus some vegetables and of course rice. Also a bottle of their best sake."
"Sake?" Remus asked. He was afraid to really know. "A type of drink?"
"Exactly." Kate said as the first course of Raw Sea Urchin arrived. "Rice wine."
Sirius looked positively green as he watched her delicately take a piece of the Sea Urchin into her mouth with the chopsticks. "How can you eat that?"
Kate picked up a piece with the chopsticks and offered it to Sirius. "Here just try it. This is fantastic!" Sirus turned a bright green and ran out of the restaurant. "What's wrong?"
"He can't stand fish." Remus said as he attempted to eat with chopsticks. "How do you use these things?"
"Here." She showed him how. "I didn't know, just assumed that he wouldn't mind trying it. I'll order some duck for him and maybe a bit of chicken. That way he can eat too." She motioned for the waiter to come back as Remus went outside to get Sirius back.
"I'm not gonna eat fish." Sirius declared. "How can you?"
"It is quite good." Remus said trying very hard to use the chopsticks. "I thought you liked shrimp." He offered him a piece of shrimp.
"Well, shrimp yes. Fish no." Sirius said as he took the shrimp. "Not bad. Are you sure this is safe."
"Very safe." Kate motioned with her chopsticks for him to try the duck. "I know the head chef here. The duck is his specialty."
Sirius lifted the chopsticks out of the package they were in and went to stab the duck. No matter what he did he couldn't get it to stay on the wood. "How come you both get two sticks and I'm stuck with one big one?"
Kate reached over and pulled the sticks apart. Then she gave him a quick lesson on how to use them. She then had the time of her life watching the two men trying to use chopsticks for the first time. Remus had started to pick it up, but Sirius couldn't get the sticks to do what he wanted them to. Finally Kate reached to the seat next to her and got a fork which she handed to Sirius. "You know you can use a fork."
Sirius just looked at her. "Why didn't you give this to me in the first place?"
Kate shrugged her shoulders and smiled. "Do you know that you are very cute when you are frustrated?" The sake that Remus had been drinking came out of his mouth and nose.
"So where to next?" Remus finally asked after trying to clean up the mess he had made.
"Like I said, a club or two that I know of. Some drinking and dancing then back home." Kate said as she paid the bill, pocketing the receipt. The trio left the restaurant and headed down the street to a little of the celebrated London nightlife.
Please read and review
Tube Underground railroad, subway.
Further adventures in London await the trio, with some laughs along the way.
