Well, I'm back. And what's more, a day early! I had a lot to do for school, but now I'm not as busy and had time to write this. Thanks for the patience. As usual, I don't own Merlin.


"I still don't see why you're blaming me." Merlin pushed his way through the underbrush behind Arthur.

"Well, I don't know, maybe because you're completely useless!"

"What have I done beside miss one thing?"

Arthur abruptly spun around, "If we're keeping track: you've missed that group that ambushed us, fed me nothing but dead awful food, lead us straight into a bloody army, and, last I checked, you still don't know why you're young."

"I thought you didn't believe me about that?"

"Well then you're a liar and an idiot. Oh, and not to mention you brought me back just to solve all your problems."

"Wha- But- That wasn't me!", Merlin blustered.

"Well you certainly haven't told me what it was."

"I don't know what it was." Merlin looked around helplessly, "Anyway, why would you blame me for that, you're alive again, isn't that a good thing?"

"I've been dropped in the middle of a war I have no stake in. You tell me."

Arthur crossed his arms and stood expectantly, Merlin opened his mouth helplessly. Arthur turned and kept pushing his way through the brush around the valley.

Merlin followed, trying to make up for his pause, "I'm sorry, it wasn't up to me, a lot of things have been happening here that I don't understand. If I'd known you didn't want to be back, I- Well I couldn't have changed it, but I could have tried to make it easier."

"Oh, and how could you do that, dolt?" He released a branch which whacked Merlin in the face.

Merlin stopped and grimaced, then started walking again, this time more quickly. "Listen, clotpole," Arthur turned around at his tone and Merlin kept going, "I didn't ask to be involved in this either, and if the last several centuries are any indication, I won't be leaving any time soon. I didn't bring you here, and you didn't ask to be brought, but you're here. And, like it or not, you are Albion's saviour. Though I can't say I have any idea why it would be someone as lousy as you. But you're all we've got, so stop blaming me and start acting like it."

An awkward silence hung in the air after Merlin's speech. When Arthur didn't respond, Merlin shrugged jerkily and tried to start walking. Arthur blocked his way and blew out a thin stream of air.

"What did 1500 years do to you?"

"Just reminded me what an ass you can be." Merlin looked down and started walking again, avoiding Arthur's gaze.

As they walked, they maintained an awkward silence, interrupted sporadically by small, meaningless remarks. The sky got darker, and the forest they were walking through got thicker and thicker, and eventually the only way to get through was for Merlin to cut away at the branches and twigs with magic. Arthur tried Excalibur, but there was barely enough room to draw it, let alone swing it. In any case, the mass of bracken around them blocked out what twilight was left to them. After a few painfully slow minutes, Arthur stopped forcing his way forward.

"This is hopeless. There has to be another way to get to Camelot from here."

Merlin flung one last spell and leaned against a tree, "Well, there is, but it isn't quick."

"This is?"

"This is more direct."

"Well anything's better than this."

"If we go back downhill that way, we can take a longer path round this valley, and through some caves to get to Camelot. Only, there's a town in that direction that we'd have to pass through and almost every town is full of either citizens or soldiers."

"So why even bother bringing it up?"

"We could avoid the town, but it would add some time to the trip. I brought extra food, but I still don't know how long it will last."

"Hmph," Arthur paused, "Might as well risk it, I can't stand going this way."

Arthur sighed and started moving down the hill in the direction Merlin indicated. Though they needed to make up for the time they would lose during the detour, there still wasn't much further they could go that night. There were already stars pricking into existence in the sky, and the flashlight Merlin had brought, though it astounded Arthur, did little to illuminate their path. Since it was a clear night, they didn't spend long looking for shelter and decided to make camp at the bottom of the hill next to a large boulder. Not that there was much camp to make. They rolled out their sleeping bags and Merlin conjured just enough fire to heat up a can of soup for them to eat. They didn't talk. Now that they were no longer moving, Merlin found it harder to distract himself, and what Arthur had said about his resurrection hung in the air even more noticeably than before.

He swallowed the last of his soup and without looking up said, "I'm sorry about... you know."

Arthur was already getting into his sleeping bag and he merely rolled over on his side, facing the boulder, saying, "Don't worry about it. Let's just get some sleep."

Merlin lay down too, but he couldn't fall sleep. At first, he distracted himself by going over their revised route and how best to avoid soldiers in the areas he knew them to be, but his thoughts soon wandered. He was remembering more of the things he'd pushed to the back of his mind. Painful memories of Gaius, Gwen, and the others, especially the time following Arthur's death. The years that followed hadn't all been bad, in fact many of them had been happy ones once the worst of the grief had passed. But they were tainted by what came next, by the deaths of his friends, and by the years of loneliness that followed. He'd picked up a few acquaintances, he couldn't help it, but once he'd realized that he wasn't dying too, he'd avoided people, for the most part. Now that Arthur was back, he wasn't just remembering his years at Camelot (of all his life, still the time with them most memories), but remembering how to act around another person. Being young helped, and there were times it felt almost normal, but not quite. He wasn't sure how long it had been when he finally realized what was off.

"I thought we were friends." Merlin whispered, half hoping Arthur was asleep and wouldn't hear him.

"What was that?" Arthur mumbled.

"After you...died. I though that, when you came back, we'd be done with this. That we'd get along, things would be different. But you're back and nothing's changed."

"Well, dunderhead, what would you know about friends?"

"More than you. And I don't mean the insults, ass. There's something else. It's not that you're a king and I'm a servant, because we're not anymore."

"Well, you've made that clear. I don't think I've done so much work in my life."

"You've barely done anything!"

There was a pause. Merlin almost thought Arthur was going to fall asleep without answering when he said, "Well it's not just my fault. You've changed. I mean, you used to have a sense of humour, I don't know where that's gone."

Merlin ignored the jibe and answered seriously, "You've been gone a long time. You don't know what I've been through."

"Well," Arthur rolled over into a more comfortable position on his back, "I'm listening."


Thanks for reading. Please review, especially suggestions for improvement. It would mean a lot.