Conversations
"Do you want to come get lunch at the house?" Nick inquired of Heath, as they finished up in the hay barn. The bunkhouse bell had just rung, signaling that the ranch cook had lunch ready for the hands. The dark haired man made it a point to act as casual as possible, while asking. Heath usually went to his house, to check on Lily; Nick understood but he missed his brother's company at the family table.
"Sure, that would be good. Lily went into town, to help her aunt and uncle at the shop." Heath replied, answering Nick's unspoken question. He hadn't been comfortable leaving Lily alone, and didn't think it was right for him to eat at the big house without her. Heath understood how hard it was for her, with the loss, and having to see Catherine with Tab.
Moving to their own place had definitely helped Lily, and Heath had enjoyed the relaxed pace of their house. They ate casually in the kitchen, delicious food that Lily happily prepared for them. Heath would then clean up, while Lily sat at the table and relaxed. The conversation would be about what Heath had done on the range, while his wife told him about her work around the house. He had laid out a vegetable garden for her, and even though she'd started late, she was still planting some seeds.
Heath liked the fact the house was theirs, and they could live the way they felt comfortable. He missed the conversations he used to have with his family in the evening, but loved the solitude that the new house gave him. There was a sense of peace and calmness, which he and Lily both needed, after the loss of the child. Heath focused all his attention on her, wanting to atone for the guilt he felt, because of what happened in San Francisco that Lily had lost the child. Nick had been his savior, in helping Heath to come to some peace in the matter, after the night they had talked. His brother was the only one who would know the pain that the younger man was struggling with.
The other night, when he and Lily had gone to the big house for dinner, Heath had been worried at how the evening was going to go. It had been good to see Lily happy, and chatting with both of her sisters-in-law. He knew that his mother had been to see her at the house several times, and he hoped that her words had helped the situation. Heath had enjoyed the time with his mother and brothers, something he'd not had for several weeks.
When Lily had announced her intention of going into town to help out at the shop, he had whole heartedly given her his blessing. Heath had never liked her working at the shop before, because of a jealousy he kept well hidden, about her being around men when he wasn't there. Now though he took her actions as a sign that things were getting back to normal. They had resumed physical relations the night after the dinner party, and they were making up for lost time.
The brothers stopped in the kitchen, to let Silas and Rachelle know that Heath would be joining them for lunch, before they headed into the front parlor. Victoria, Jarrod, Samantha, and Catherine were all there, watching Tab lying on a blanket on the floor. The older woman was down on the floor next to the baby, getting his attention with a rattle, while Catherine was sitting on a low stool playing with Tab's feet.
Nick strode into the room, saying hello in a loud voice, before kissing his wife intensely. He then reached down and scooped up his son, to hold him tight. Nick held the baby while Catherine stood next to him, her hand on his shoulder as she looked at them both with love. Heath watched the family scene and felt a tug of sadness hit him, wishing that it was him and Lily with a baby. The picture he saw though wasn't them, and it was brought home when Rosa, the nanny, came to take Tab as Silas announced that lunch was ready.
If it had been him and Lily, there would not have been a nanny on the scene. Lily had announced that no one else would take care of their babies, to which Heath had agreed. She had told him the other night that it was almost unfair that Catherine, who had a baby, would have a nanny. She would have been so grateful to have a child that she would gladly have done all the care herself. Heath hoped, at the back of his mind, that his wife would not come to resent Catherine over the matter.
"Heath, are you joining us for lunch? How is Lily?" Victoria beamed with pleasure at her youngest son, cutting into his thoughts. She had seen the pain that the couple was in, and knew that while Lily coped by crying, her youngest son withdrew into himself. The move to their own house had concerned her, not sure if they should be alone so much. However, she kept her misgivings to herself, and judging by the other night at dinner, Heath and Lily had made the right decision.
"She is doing really well, and is in town helping out at the chandler's shop. I think she missed the hustle and bustle." Heath replied, nodding his head about lunch. He chatted to his mother some more, and missed the smiles that Catherine and Samantha exchanged. Both women had been pleased that Lily had come the other night, and been in good spirits, especially with them.
"I'm glad that she is getting out again! Let me tell you, one can only stare at the walls for so long!" Catherine declared, after she and Nick had handed off Tab to Rosa. He wouldn't need to eat for another two hours or so, and was in fact more than ready for a nap. She was looking forward to a peaceful lunch, and a nap of her own. As a nursing mother she knew that she needed to eat well, and get as much rest as possible.
"I can relate to that right now, even if the walls are lovely." Samantha agreed, before turning to Heath "It was great to see you both last night! I feel bad I've not seen the house yet, but of course I am not going anywhere right now. Lily told me about what she'd done with it, which sounds very nice." In fact, only Victoria, and Lily's aunt and uncle, had seen the house.
When they had first moved in, she had stated that until she felt ready, she didn't want any company. He was ready to agree to anything, to keep the crying fits from coming back, so he had gone along. Heath had been glad his brothers had understood, when he'd put them off about visiting. It had been especially hard with Nick, since he'd done a lot of the finish work on the house.
"She has been busy, and the house looks great. I think we'll probably have a party next month, after round up." Heath informed them, mentally crossing his fingers that Lily would go along with the plan.
"Well I'm glad that you are waiting until then, because otherwise I couldn't go. I'm not even sure how long I will last at the BBQ tomorrow night." Samantha stated, as Jarrod helped her up. Heath asked about it, wondering what the occasion was.
"It is to welcome Emily to Stockton, and give everyone the chance to meet her. We just decided to do it yesterday evening, and Nicholas was supposed to tell you about it, so you could talk to Lily." Catherine explained, giving her husband a wry look.
"Sugar, we just got so busy I forgot!" Nick put his arms around her and kissed her, as she snuggled close to him. Heath mentally shook his head, still amazed at how the couple carried on, even after a year and a half of marriage. In his experience, by the time the first child arrived most marriages had cooled down considerably. Of course, he reasoned, Nick was never cool about anything, and would probably approach marriage the same way.
"Where is your English visitor?" Heath looked around and didn't see the auburn haired girl. Lily had told him how beautiful she thought Emily was, and how poised too. He had then pointed out the comments she'd made, about the native population of India. His wife had seen firsthand the misery that slavery had produced, because of St. Louis straddling the Missouri Compromise.
Heath then told her about the Modoc, and other native tribes, and how they had fared under westward expansion. He knew he was walking a fine line, because of how the 'white people' had benefited because of the new lands. It was important though for her to understand that everyone's honor should be maintained. At the back of his mind, he decided to take her on his next trip to the reservation. Heath wanted to share the traditions of the tribe with her, which had been a big part of his life.
Luckily she had seen what he was saying, and agreed that Emily, along with Catherine missed the whole point. She did though state that maybe he was being unfair to the women, since they'd been born a continent away. The world they came from was nothing like the new world, and she thought he needed to give them leeway in how they lived their lives. Heath bowed his head to her observation, having never looked at it from that point of view.
"Ah, Zack Morton presented himself earlier, to take her riding and for lunch at his place." Jarrod imparted the information in a pleased tone. By now they were in the dining room, with Silas passing plates of food.
"I was there when he arrived, and Jarrod was right about him being one smitten young man. He didn't take his eyes off of her the entire time." Victoria shared her observation with a happy smile. She had never liked the rivalry that had occurred with the two ranches, and was glad when it came to an end. "Emily looked stunning, so I can understand Zack's reaction." The older woman commented as she helped herself to some salad.
"Glad to see that he is working fast, but I'm not sure about a visit to the Morton's house was a good idea. I might need to talk to Zack, and help him out." Nick advised, as he took a forkful of food, before he answered the looks he was getting. "I don't see how a meal in a cold, dark room, with JR and Rufus is going to set the stage for any romance."
"Nick, that is unfair! The house is lovely, and I remember the parties that Diana used to give. What do you mean by cold and dark?" Victoria reprimanded her son, and then had a second thought. "I might agree with you about lunch with Rufus and JR though."
"I am rather surprised that Zack is bringing her home that soon. Nick has a point, both about scaring her off and the house. The study is the only room that is comfortable, which is where they spend all their time. Add in that JR is going to try to put the moves on her, while Rufus will be stern and silent – no, it is not conductive to romance." Jarrod had been to the Morton's house, and knew the family very well.
"Maybe Zack wants to be upfront with her, about what his family his like." Samantha conjectured, going on "I've only met him once, and know just what you all have told me about him. What is the expression – tackle the bull by the horns?"
"Samantha, you might be right. I will also say that both those boys have never been anything other than polite when I've seen them at social events. They, and Rufus, go to church and are always willing to help out if needed. Losing their mother was hard, and must have made life different at the house." Victoria apprised, feeling sympathy for the two young men. She now wished she had kept in closer touch with Rufus, but her life had been so busy at the time.
"Emily's father was a major general, and very authoritative. He was my grandfather's ADC and could stare down anyone who crossed him, no matter how grand. However, he loved Emily and her mother very much. They knew just how to handle him, and I bet that Emily will get a smile out of Rufus." Catherine informed the group, hoping that she was right. She really wanted her friend to stay in the valley, and Zack was a good catch. Emily wouldn't have to worry about her aunt and her husband, or being a governess.
"There is still the matter of JR though. I somehow don't see him conceding the field to his brother without a struggle." Heath commented, thinking about how competitive the young man was. He made it a point to stare at his food as he said the words, not wanting to challenge his mother on her comments about the Morton's. Heath was pretty sure that she had never seen the attitude that Rufus and his sons displayed towards him. As far as Emily with Rufus, Catherine was right, Heath was sure, in how her friend would handle the stern man.
"After tomorrow night, both those boys are going to have a lot more players to contend with. Once everyone meets Emily we are going to be overrun with gentleman callers. It will be our sister all over again!" Jarrod proclaimed, giving his brothers a look of warning.
"I still think I need to take Zack aside and give him some advice." Nick divulged, not wanting his front room overrun with infatuated young men.
"Nick, may I give you some advice?" Victoria held up her hand, and Nick cocked his head to hear her next words. "Stay out of it, and let mother nature take its course. Zack did the right thing, by introducing her to his family right away. He is very close to them, and a woman who wants him will have to deal with that fact."
The rest of the family agreed, and then Samantha changed the subject, mentioning something she had read in the newspaper. Since she couldn't go any further than the garden, because of her condition, she had become a voracious reader. Jarrod subscribed to newspapers from various parts of the country, and even if they were a week old she still read them.
Later that afternoon at the Rising M
Jim Hamilton found JR in the Blacksmith's shop, counting used horseshoes, which would be, at some future date, pounded down. The foreman had not had the chance to talk to Rufus, but decided to tackle JR anyway. He'd been at the ranch since the boys were small, and had watched them grow up. Jim was also aware that sometimes it was better for someone who wasn't so close to the situation to intervene.
"That was quite the beautiful girl Zack brought to lunch." Jim observed, after watching JR pretend to count. JR in fact had barely acknowledged his arrival, and was hoping that the man would take the hint and leave. He was still in a snit about his brother's behavior, towards him and Emily.
"Humph, if you like that type of thing! I thought she was rather frilly." JR retorted, wishing he could have come up with something more negative to say about her. In truth, he agreed with Jim that she was beautiful, and hated to admit that he was envious of his brother. He didn't see the look of sympathy that the older man got on his face, as he listened to JR's reply.
"You know that I met her when she arrived, on the train with Zack." Jim watched as JR turned to look at him, finally giving up on the horseshoes. "My first thought, when I saw them together, was that your brother was bringing home a bride. They looked like a young couple in love, and I was very happy for your brother. And then I was rather sad when I heard the reason she was on the train." He stopped, and hoped that JR would listen to what he needed to hear.
"Why were you sad?" JR was in fact surprised that Jim would use that term, in relation to Zack. In his mind, his older brother had the world by its horns, and knew it. He had watched beloved brother stride into a number of exclusive clubs and be fawned over, even as he went along with the ride. Zack was the older son, and everyone knew what that meant. Of course in the Morton household, it meant that Zack was first in the line of fire with their father.
"JR, I know how close you boys are, and you were worried about your brother back in the spring, right?" Jim queried, and the young man now remembered asking the foreman if he'd noticed something going on with Zack. He now nodded his head, and waited to hear what the man would say next. Jim in a lot of ways was like a father to him, especially in how he had helped him deal with Rufus and Zack.
"When Zack stepped off the train, he looked like his old self, even better in fact and nothing like when he'd left to go to Colorado. Whatever went on, that girl is a large part of the reason why your brother is happy again. I would think you care enough about him to be pleased about that, and to welcome her to your home." Jim knew JR had missed Zack, and had felt upset that his older brother had not confided in him. The foreman didn't know what had caused Zack's misery, but he respected a man's right to privacy.
"Exactly what are you trying to tell me?" JR huffed, knowing that the foreman wasn't out here because he had nothing else to do. A large part wished the man would go away, but there was a small part – the part that wanted the closeness he'd had with his brother back, that hoped the man wouldn't.
"You've missed your brother, and I know that you feel like you two are not that close right now, right?" Jim put it in the form of a question, wanting the young man to come to the realization himself. JR turned away for a moment, and pretended to be looking at a bin of nails, while he wrestled with what to say. Talking about the situation felt like he was betraying his brother's trust, but he already felt that Zack had done that, with Emily. It was that thought that broke his reserve.
"How come he tells Emily all about me, but doesn't say word to me about her? I had to bring it up the other night, after talking to you. He hadn't even told Pa about her!" Zack got right to the heart of what rankled so badly. Jim heard the hurt in JR's voice, as he made his statement. The foreman was now glad that he had taken the imitative to talk to the younger brother; Rufus was too close to the matter.
"I think that when Zack was talking to Emily on the train, he was a proud young man telling a pretty girl about his family and the ranch. You should be honored that he wanted to share that information with her. Wouldn't you have been the same way, if you were the one on the train?" Jim suggested, and watched as JR chewed his lip. The dark haired brother had to admit that the older man had a point; he could see his brother talking with pride about his life.
"Ok, fine I get it! But that still doesn't explain why Zack didn't talk to me about Emily?" JR was still holding on to his last annoyance, not going to let it go easily. The foreman sighed, but knew that what he had to address next was the most important, for the brother's relationship.
"JR, exactly how did you bring the subject up with Zack? What did you say?" Jim tilted his head, as he regarded the young man. Remembering the guy's reaction when the foreman had told him about the girl, and knowing how young men were with women, he was pretty sure what had played out.
"Ah, well I just asked. I mean I said." JR previcated his answer, as the considered how he'd questioned Zack about Emily. His father's comment from this morning, about his brother not liking the filly reference rang in his mind. Hanging his head slightly, JR moved some dirt around with the toe of his boot before answering.
"I told Zack I wanted to hear all about the English filly – something along that kind of line." The young admitted, leaving out the reference about her curves. As he thought that though, he remembered that Jim was the one who'd told him about her. "But hey, you told me about her and why did Zack get upset about how I said it? We've always talked about girls that way." Jim was by now ready to dunk JR in the horse trough, but summoned more patience, as if he was working with a stubborn horse.
"You will find that when you fall in love with a woman, you are going to be very protective of her. Hearing another man talk about her in a disrespectful way will make you very angry." The foreman explained, going on "I bet if you had talked to Zack and asked nicely about the girl, he would have told you. Zack is at a different place in his life than you are JR, and you need to understand that. He still loves you, but I'm pretty sure he loves that little girl too."
JR thought about what Jim had just said, and replayed the conversation that he'd had with Zack, his first night back. His only interest in Emily had been selfish, and he'd not stopped to think that maybe Zack didn't want to talk about her in front of their Pa. "Jim, what do I need to do? I miss my brother, and I want him to be happy." JR admitted finally, letting go of his annoyance. It was hard to ask for help, but he knew he needed it. He was also ready to concede that his brother loved Emily, even if he didn't realize it yet.
"Find a quiet time, just the two of you and talk to him. Let him know you misunderstood the situation and want to make it right. Zack will be glad you've taken the first step, and I know he has missed you too." Jim advised JR, not saying the word apology right out, but knowing that the young man would understand. He watched as JR stood up straighter, and had his cheerful, satisfied smile on his face. Things were going to be fine at the Rising M, the foreman thought; in fact they were going to be better than they'd been in a long time.
That evening, before dinner JR went and knocked on the door to Zack's room. He had seen his brother come back from taking Emily home, but then watched as he got busy in the tack room. There were several hands around, so JR knew that it wasn't the time or place for a talk. Now though would be perfect. Ruth had let them know that dinner was going to be later than usual, because Rufus was still out at the cattle shed on the eastern border.
"Hey, hello. Do you have a couple of minutes to talk?" JR asked diffidently, wondering if he was going to get the door slammed in his face. He felt better when Zack stepped back to let him in, indicating he wanted to talk too.
"Did you and Emily have a nice ride back?" JR inquired, starting with something simple. He was only asking to make conversation, but Zack gave him a pointed look which puzzled him. In fact Zack was wondering if JR had followed them, and seen what had happened at the stream. He still couldn't believe what had occurred, and it had been very hard to take Emily back to the Barkley's. Saying good bye was hard too, but some of that was because Nick and Heath watching. Zack had made it a point to be as appropriate as possible, but still felt like the two pair of eyes could see right through him.
"Yes, JR we did." Zack realized he was feeling guilty, and that there was no way his brother would have followed them. He had no intention though of giving JR any more information about the afternoon.
"Listen, I need to apologize for being an ass this afternoon. I was unfair to you and Emily." JR wasn't one for beating around the bush and got right down to business. He didn't know why his brother was looking at him oddly, but he had noticed the short response to his mundane question.
"What is bringing this on?" Zack sat down on the edge of the bed, and regarded his brother with narrowed eyes. He was in fact curious as to what his brother was going to say, and rather impressed that he'd come to his room to do it. JR was not the most introspective person, at the best of times, and when he was upset it was like he had blinders on.
"I was jealous of you with Emily, and I was also bothered by how you had told her about me, but had not said anything regarding her to me." JR explained, and then thinking of the talk with Jim, added "I also would like to apologize for how I called her a filly. I didn't realize at first how much she meant to you."
"JR, what do you mean by saying 'how much she means to me'?" Zack wondered again if JR had seen the incident by the stream. He was just acknowledging his feelings for Emily to himself, and what they meant; it took him back that JR could see what was going on.
"Please, you are in love with her! And Zack, I think she might feel the same way about you." JR laughed, and then thought of something else. "I'd like the chance, tomorrow night at the BBQ, to apologize to her too. Would that be all right?" He didn't want his older brother to think that he was going to step on his toes.
"I have only just met her, JR." Zack didn't want to discuss Emily with JR, feeling that it was too personal. All the emotions he was going through were so new and different to him. On one hand he wanted to protect her against the world, and then he wanted her in his bed so badly he could hardly breathe. Up until now girls had either been good – i.e. pure and untouchable – or available – like at the saloon. The fact that Emily was so innocent, and yet could arouse such passion in him was hard to comprehend.
"Now look, I spent all spring with you shutting me out, and I didn't like it! Zack, don't shut me out again! I'm trying to tell you that I'm happy for you!" JR stomped his foot for emphasis, getting annoyed that his overtures were being rebuffed.
Zack heard what his brother was saying, and also picked up the hurt that JR was trying to acknowledge. It came to him that he'd been closing his brother out ever since San Francisco and the younger man had not liked it. He had responded as only JR would respond, by being, as he admitted, an asshole. Zack was also finding JR's comment, about how much Emily meant to him, interesting.
"JR, thank you for saying that." Zack began, "I think I've been rather unfair to you, with everything that has gone on." He sighed, it hitting home how much work JR had probably been doing, while he was in Colorado. Zack told his brother that, and then decided to tell him at least some of the story.
"There was a reason I went to Colorado, JR; one that I didn't want to talk about before." Zack started, and saw his brother looking at him with interest. He knew that he would have to be careful what he said, to protect the people involved, but felt that his brother deserved to know why at least. He stood up and walked across the room, to fiddle with a wooden sculpture of a mountain lion on top of the small bookcase.
"I became infatuated with a woman, back in the early part of the year. Please don't ask me who, I can't say." Zack had seen the question in JR's eyes, and answered it, before he went on. "The relationship was never going to work, and it became very clear after the trip to San Francisco. Unfortunately, the woman was one that I really couldn't avoid, which made it hard to deal with my feelings. When Grandfather David's letter came, it seemed like a god send. And just so you know, I never told Pa any of this, but he guessed what was going on. I think he sees more than we realize."
JR processed what his brother had just told him, and tried to think of who the woman could be. Based on what Zack had said, JR reasoned that the woman was either married, or one of the saloon girls. Neither would have been accepted by their father, or society, he knew very well. Zack's comment, about not being able to avoid her, made him think the woman was married. JR suddenly felt sorry for his brother, to find himself in that position. He wondered who she was, to capture Zack's interest like she had. However, he would respect his brother's discretion on the matter; it came to him that he really didn't want to know in the end.
"Zack, I understand but I wish you would have told me sooner." JR told him with sympathy, before a new thought came to his brain. "But it is obvious that you are over her right?" He hoped that Zack wasn't with Emily because he couldn't have this other woman. JR could understand physical desire with no problem; hell he felt it at least three times a week!
"Oh, I am so over her. In reality, we had nothing in common and it would have been a big mistake. It did make me realize though that I wanted something more in my life, than what I have had up until now. I want someone to share things with, and laugh about them too." Zack replied, and told JR about Maisie's observation. His brother knew all about the woman, and nodded his knowingly.
"Maybe everything happened for a reason, so you could meet Emily. Have you kissed her yet?" JR couldn't help himself from asking. He felt better that things with his brother were back to the way they had been. Not only that, but his brother was in love with a splendid gal, who, JR was sure, would make him very happy.
"Honestly, JR I don't think that is any of your business." Zack shook his head, trying to hide a smile. If JR only knew about the train, or this afternoon, well he could only imagine what his younger brother would be asking. They were both men in full, and had enjoyed female company in the past.
"Do you remember Pa telling us once that he proposed to Ma the first time they met? I think you should do that with Emily!" JR encouraged his brother, seeing no reason to wait any longer. He was pretty sure that the English filly, er girl he corrected mentally, liked his brother too.
"If you recall, Grandfather David through him out of the house! Please, I have only met Emily and there is the question of her aunt." Zack went on to tell JR the story of why Emily was on the train, leaving out the details of the compartment. JR had no problem understanding what the issue was, and he gave Zack a direct look.
"Ok, so even more reason to marry her quickly! Her aunt and the creepy husband can't touch her if Emily is your wife." JR had it all figured out, and didn't understand why Zack wasn't going along. He decided to light a fire under his brother's feet. "Look, after the BBQ tomorrow night there are going to be fellas lining up to call on her. You need to strike while the iron his hot!"
Zack gave his brother a rueful smile, thinking only JR could go from wanting the girl for himself, to suggesting that his brother marry her quickly. He had told Emily that his younger brother was as loyal as they came, and Zack saw that clearly again.
"JR, thank you for the advice; but can I ask why you are in such a hurry to marry me off now?" Zack inquired of the brown haired young man.
"Well, I want to see you happy! There is also the fact that if you are married, I won't have to compete with you for girls' attentions at the parties." JR replied with a laugh, and then turned slightly serious. "Plus, there is the fact that lunch was a lot more pleasant with Pa being outgoing. If you marry Emily I bet that he'd make more of an effort!" That made both boys laughed, and they went down to the study very happily.
