AN: Frag. My. Life. Yes, I am back. At least until my parents confiscate my computer (though extremely unlikely, it might happen). No, I am in no way happy about it. I left in the first place so I could reevaluate my writing style and hopefully turn out better for it, in the wake of what has happened.

Coming back at both the objections of my readers and the relentless encouragement of my wonderful co-author on Prime: the Beast Saga, bravekid (I promise I will send you the preview this weekend), I find that nothing has changed. That is why the 'Frag. My. Life.' is there - my writing style does not understand that I wanted it to change and has remained the way it was.

... But, on a brighter note, I was struck by a touch of inspiration from Dream'sRealm while writing this chapter. On Across This New Divide, she puts a Bible verse at the end of every chapter. I found myself fascinated with it. So, to do something similar, I'm going to leave a few lines from my favorite Christian songs at the beginning of each chapter, regardless of which story it is.

What will people think when they hear that I'm a Jesus Freak?

What will people do when they find that it's true?

I don't really care if they label me a Jesus Freak

There ain't no disguising the truth.

- DC Talk, 'Jesus Freak'

Disclaimer: I regret to inform you that I still do not own Transformers.


Shiloh picked up the old photograph on the nightstand and stood there for a moment, staring at it. She wasn't really sure what she should be feeling. The photograph was a little over seventeen years old; it had been taken a few months before her parents were arrested. Shiloh only remembered bits and pieces of living with her parents, but she'd never given it much thought. After all, she had the rest of her family. "I wonder what you'd have to say about what's going on," she thought aloud. She quickly laughed at the absurdness of the statement. Why should she care? She hardly knew them. The photograph was placed in its original position, upside-down on the nightstand.

Shiloh searched her room for her backpack. It had to be in here somewhere... Ah, there it was! Next to the window for some strange reason. Shiloh retrieved it, removing all the school-related items from its interior. Textbooks and binders were carelessly thrown to the floor, their pages ripping and bending. At the very bottom was the hand-held communicator Knock Out had given her.

A glance at the clock on the far wall told her she had found it just in time. On cue, the device began to vibrate. Fumbling with the switch, Shiloh answered the call. She greeted the speaker with a curt, "Hello," instead of her traditional "Aloha".

::My, my, someone's in a bad mood today. Care to tell me why?::

Shiloh bit back the irritated sigh rising in her throat. She had plenty of time later to contemplate all the different ways to deal blows to Knock Out's ego. Or at least get him to drop the sarcastic tone. "There are more important things to discuss at this exact moment."

::Very well, but it would be better to discuss them in private. You never know who's listening when you're not speaking face-to-face.::

Shiloh held the communicator in one hand and re-packed her backpack with the other. "Point taken. I'd tell you to meet me in the park in a little while, but Vince found out last time... Plus, I have school."

::That does pose a problem. However, I had a different meeting place in mind.:: Knock Out actually sounded thoughtful for once.

"Where?"

::Somewhere secluded, where there is no chance of anyone accidentally stumbling on our conversation.::

This time Shiloh let the sigh escape. "'M really not in the mood for vague answers," she cautioned.

::Mile marker 18 heading South out of Jasper. Be there at four.::

Concise, short, and to the point. Shiloh might have liked Knock Out better if he always talked like that. "I'll be there."


Gym was Shiloh's favorite class. With the specific course she'd chosen, she got to let out her frustration on the sandbags every other class period. Lily was in the class, so that made it twice as great. The only downside was that the Exchange Student - her name was either Miku or Miko; Shiloh could never remember - had also signed up for the course.

Today was an off-day, as the coach, Ms. Jennings, called them. This meant the entire class was held outside. They didn't do any cardio or weights on off-days. Everyone relaxed for the most part, sometimes opting to do a lap around the track just for the sake of it. Others would play with the sports equipment Ms. Jennings brought out with them.

"Vince told me about yesterday," Lily commented, tossing a basketball at Shiloh.

The other girl caught it and tossed it back. "Mm. What'd he tell you?"

"He told me he saw you hanging in the park with one of the racers - the Aston Martin's driver, I believe." The pattern of tossing the basketball back and forth continued until it became monotonous. Shiloh still hadn't replied when Lily at last dropped the ball, stepping on it to prevent it from rolling away. "Vince was worried when he came to talk to me. Said you told him to leave."

"It wasn't the best time for him to burst in," Shiloh said truthfully. She held her hands out for the ball. Her fingers were starting to itch at the accusations, however simple and innocent they were. Lily sighed and threw her the basketball. "He misunderstood what was going on. We were just talking; nothing else."

Lily suddenly looked away, wringing her hands together. "Of course," she agreed. "Vince was stupid to believe otherwise. Um, listen, Shy, there's something Vince and I have been meaning to tell you."

Shiloh tossed the basketball up in the air and caught it. The action prevented her hands from wandering to the switchblade in her back pocket as they so often did when she was uncomfortable. "What's that?"

"Remember Trey and Keith?"

"From the Circuit? Yeah, they're pretty cool guys."

Lily cautiously met her friend's gaze again and replied flatly, "They got arrested right after we left Saturday night. Nobody ever told us they were the ones in charge of the entire Circuit, but somehow the cops knew."

Fowler had mentioned the organizers being arrested, but Shiloh had never imagined he meant Trey and Keith. "They're really in jail?"

"Yep. Scheduled to be in court in a more major city shortly." Lily looked away again. Her attitude served to set Shiloh more on edge. She blurted out, "I'm worried you're going to do something stupid, Shiloh! I know how much Seth means to you, but is it really worth-"

Her outburst was cut off by a sudden pressure on her throat. Shiloh's dark eyes burned into Lily's lighter ones. The basketball bounced where Shiloh had dropped it on the other side of the court. Lily swallowed, her breath turning shallow.

The shadow clouding Shiloh's face passed and she saw the switchblade in her hand. Her hand jerked away abruptly. She turned, running towards the far side of the court. A sharp tap on her shoulder made her freeze.

"You just pulled a knife on your friend."

Shiloh whirled around to see the Exchange Student standing with her arms crossed. She dropped her voice to barely above a whisper. "You want to see it again? I'd be delighted to oblige."

Miko backed off a step. She waited for a second to see if the senior's dark smile would fade, and then returned to where most of the class was clustered around Lily.

"Are you okay?"

"She didn't hurt you, right?"

Numerous questions of this nature assailed the blonde racer, each punctuated with a comforting touch on the shoulder or arm. Lily stood, her hand on her throat where the blade had been pressed not a full minute ago, staring after her friend. Suddenly her expression cleared and she shoved her classmates away from her. "Nobody breathes a word of this to anyone, understand?" she ordered. "Or I will personally break your arm." Everyone nodded, albeit hesitantly. Thankfully Mrs. Jennings was on the complete opposite side of the field and had seen nothing. "I have to find Vince." She met the eyes of each of the other students in turn to be sure they really wouldn't say anything before walking off in the direction of the school building.


Shiloh slammed her car door shut, not even bothering to buckle herself in. There was still another full period left in the school day, but there was no way she'd be able to take the questioning glances from Lily and the angry glares from the other students. The only way she could avoid that was to ditch the rest of school. She crossed her arms over the wheel and threw her head down on them. "What the hell was I thinking? I'm sorry, Lily. I'm so sorry."

Having nowhere else to go that someone wouldn't think to look for her at, she left for the designated meeting place with Knock Out.

Mile marker 18, she thought absently as she drove. Easily the most beautiful place in the desert when the sun goes down. And she, of all people, would know. She liked sunsets, and often left town to watch them - a habit from living most of her life in Hawaii. Though it was true that not many cars went down the route that took them past mile marker 18, it was still strange of Knock Out to decide to meet there.

She was so caught up in thought that she had to stomp on the brakes to avoid running past the marker.

A string of curses and another slamming of her head on the wheel. "Damn it, Lily, I'm sorry." She couldn't get the image of the glinting blade pressed against her best friend's neck out of her head, no matter how hard she tried.

It was terrifying, almost slitting your friend's throat and being completely unaware of it until the last second.

Worse was the fact that she hadn't felt any guilt until five minutes later.

Shiloh parked her car right off the road and pulled out her cell phone. She scrolled through her contacts until she found Lily's name.

'I don't know what I was thinking back there. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me, Lily.'

After the barest pause, she sent the text.

Not a minute later came the reply, 'I know you didn't mean to. Be careful of that racer. Please.'

Shiloh had no idea how to reply, and instead snapped the phone shut, slid it into her back pocket with the switchblade - she recoiled upon touching it, remembering how it had been used earlier that day - and settled down to wait until four.


"Morning," trilled Knock Out after he had arrived and exited his car.

Having seen him coming, Shiloh was already leaning against her own car. "It's the middle of the afternoon," she corrected none too gently.

"Afternoon, then," Knock Out said, completely unabashed. He smiled in a way that would have made any typical girl melt. "You do realize that without fail you always manage to scowl when I arrive." His footfalls curiously kicked up no sand whatsoever as he approached. "I find it rather amusing... and somewhat cute."

"What is it with you and tangents?"

"What is it with you and refusing to smile?"

Sighing in defeat, Shiloh met him halfway between the two cars. "I'll drop the subject if you do."

Knock Out extended his hand, but the gesture was ignored. The corners of his lips twitched slightly - and not in amusement. He retracted his hand. "Fair enough deal." His eyes narrowed a fraction. "Before we start to discuss the matter at hand, I need to know: do you trust me?"

"I don't know." It was as close to the truth as Shiloh could get without being insulting. "If I can trust you, I mean."

Lurching forward, Knock Out slipped one hand around to the back of her neck while the other held the front of her shirt. He leaned in so his mouth was right next to her ear. "I'm your only chance, we both know that," he hissed. "You can do nothing for your cousin without me. So I'll ask one more time, and I want the honest answer. Do you trust me?"

"Yes... I trust you," Shiloh replied breathlessly. Unease had started to build in the pit of her stomach. There was something off about this whole situation, but she couldn't pin it down.

"Very good," Knock Out praised, his voice a smooth purr. "Now, if you promise not to ask questions or freak out, there's something I need to show you." When there was no reply, he leaned a little bit closer and prompted, "Promise." Forced into such close proximity with the older racer, and her voice held captive in the back of her throat, Shiloh could do nothing more than nod mutely into Knock Out's shoulder. "Wise choice."

Shiloh felt the pressure on the back of her neck and hand gripping her shirt vanish. No, it was not only the hands that vanished, but their owner, as well. Knock Out had literally dissolved into thin air. "The hell..." she muttered, her voice breaking free. She looked over to make sure the Aston Martin had not disappeared, too. It was still there. "What in Milu's name just happened?!"

"Ah-ah, I thought I told you, no questions." The voice - Knock Out's voice, Shiloh amended - emanated from the sports car.

Shiloh almost tripped over nothing as she took a hasty step backwards. "But that's imp-"

"No," came Knock Out's voice again, firmer this time. "You promised not to freak out or ask questions. Now, stay silent and be a good human."

"Don't talk to me like I'm a-"

"No. Be quiet."

The Aston Martin's exterior began to shift, dividing into plates and rearranging themselves in a twisted sort of pattern. Next the internals of the sports car shifted in sections with them. Finally a humanoid figure emerged from the shifting mass of parts, crimson red and gleaming in the sunlight.

It was at least thirty feet tall.

Shiloh backed up, tripping over her own shoes, until she was pressed against the side of her car. The color had drained from her skin, leaving it with a sickly pallor. "The hell..." she repeated. "Hana ma'alela. It's got to be, because this is not happening. There is no way this is happening. Dear gods, hana ma'aela."

The robot bore more than a passing resemblance to Knock Out, in fact, were she to have been completely coherent, Shiloh would have said their features were identical. Now, one of the robot's eyebrows was raised and its mouth turned downwards in a confused frown. "What?"

"Hana ma'aela. I had to have crashed or something on the way here. This is not happening."

"Be quiet and explain what that means!" The robot appeared agitated now.

"Hana ma'alea?" Shiloh shakily looked up at it, amazed by its deep red optics but afraid to show it. "It- it means trick."

The robot chuckled and knelt so that they were able to see each other better. "I assure you, human, that I am no trick." He proffered one of his massive servos for her to touch, and touch it she did. Dismay mingled with curiosity touched her face. "You already know me, in fact."

"Oh, dear gods, no. No, no, no, no, no." It began to dawn on Shiloh, but unfortunately, she did not like the implications. This could not be Knock Out. It couldn't. But the voices were the same, the manner was the same, the expression was the same, the robot had even formed itself from his car.

Finally giving in to the reality that the giant robot in front of her was no illusion, Shiloh had but two words. "Explain. Now."


Translations:

Aloha - Hello.

Hana ma'aela - Trick.