DC: Hi, readers. Sorry for not updating in a while. I've been busy. Anyway, my friend forced me to listen to "The Lumberjack Song" by Monty Python. It rocks! Oh, I'm going to use you in my story Ceil. Don't kill me!
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DC: Oh yeah, on with the story!
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After removing Chuck Norris from the arena, Team Nightmare and Team Rose entered the ring.
"Welcome to the final round!" exclaimed the announcer, "Please welcome our two finalists: Team Nightmare and Team Rose!" The crowd went wild. Suddenly, a white hedgehog with blue quills like Shadow's stood up and pulled out a megaphone.
"YEAH CREAM, YOU'RE LOOKING HOT TONIGHT! YEAH! WHOO!" yelled the seemingly drunken hedgehog. Everyone turned and looked at him.
"Oh, God," muttered Shadow, "It's my brother, Ceil." Ceil continued yelling innuendos at Cream. Bane got mad.
"Don't you know she's only 6?" yelled Bane, "Filthy pervert!" He picked up a random glass bottle and threw it at Ceil. The bottle hit him square in the head, knocking him unconscious.
"Anyway," said the ref. "FIGHT!"
Team Rose and Team Nightmare stood facing each other. Suddenly, Amy got a strange look in her eyes.
"Why, hello, cutie." she said in a love-struck voice. Bane and Yawackhary looked at each other. "I mean the cat." clarified Amy. Yawackhary sighed. Bane cringed. Amy swaggered up to him. "Why don't we leave this place and head back to my house?" Amy moved really close to Bane. Sonic stood up.
"I thought we had something special." he sobbed as he ran away. Amy rolled her eyes.
"Uh, well," stammered Bane, "You're, uh, pretty, but…" Amy couldn't hold back. She pulled Bane into a kiss. The crowed gasped. The announcer gasped. The readers gasped (hopefully). Yawackhary laughed psychotically. Carnage stared with a look of pure hatred. After 11.1649 seconds Bane pulled away.
"What is you're problem?" he exclaimed. Carnage walked up to Bane and slapped him, then turned to Amy.
"You," she said, "How could you? You had everything you could want and still you wanted more." she paused. "I love him" Everyone gasped again (except for maybe the readers who saw this coming since Chapter 4). Amy summoned her hammer.
"It's on!" she exclaimed as Carnage rushed at her, shuriken drawn. Yawackhary, Cream, and the audience stood in awe. Big was busy petting Froggy, Bane was cleaning his mouth out with bleach, and the announcer was busy solving a Rubic's Cube. Carnage and Amy fought intensely. Carnage was going totally berserk, unleashing a series of attacks worthy of Sasuke Uchiha. After ten solid minutes, Carnage and Amy stood panting. Suddenly Carnage pointed behind Amy.
"Great Scott!" exclaimed Carnage, "Tom Felton, Orlando Bloom, and Johnny Depp are shooting a modeling calendar!" Amy spun around. Carnage homing attacked her from behind, knocking her off the ring.
While this was happening, Yawackhary walked up to Big.
"Hey, could you hold this?" Yawackhary asked producing a bomb.
"Uh, okay little ducky!" said Big. Yawackhary handed him the bomb and ran away. Big exploded off the ring. Seeing her team lost, Cream broke down crying. Ceil stood back up with his megaphone.
"HEY, BABY! COME UP HERE AND CEIL WILL MAKE IT ALL BETTER!" Suddenly, he was knocked out with a perfectly aimed Pepsi can.
"Was it true what you said?" asked Bane to Carnage. She nodded and turned away. Bane grabbed her chin softly and turned her head back. "Don't be embarrassed. I love you, too." He pulled Carnage closer and kissed her lightly on the lips. The audience awed (and so should have the readers).
"What a sickeningly sweet episode." said Cheese in perfect not chao-like English. Everyone in the universe gasped. Cheese laughed. "Do not think that Omochao was the only Cat Mage hater among us. No, the entire chao race hates Cat Mages." Cheese shot a Coma spell at Carnage. She fainted in Bane's arms. Cheese cast a Gale. Yawackhary was blown off the ring. Bane stood his ground. He laid Carnage's body down on the ground.
"Only feline." said Cheese as he charged at Bane. Cheese cast a Flame Fist spell on himself. Bane did likewise. They hit each other mightily. The stadium shook with the force. Cheese flew backwards and landed on his feet.
"I appear to have underestimated you." said Cheese. He cast an Invisibility spell and vanished. Bane stood gathering his energy.
"There is only one spell strong enough to defeat him." he thought. Suddenly Cheese fell upon Bane. Bane was ready for it. He dodged Cheese, grabbed him by the throat and flew straight up.
"He can fly!" exclaimed the announcer.
"He can fly!" exclaimed the audience.
"I love you." said Ceil to Cream huddled under the seats. Bane flew up into the sky. He chucked Cheese at the ground, did a cool moon-eclipsing pose and cast the ultimate light spell.
"CELESTRIAL STRIKE!" exclaimed Bane. He started to glow as he plummeted down upon Cheese. He struck with a force to level buildings.
It was a quiet day in New York City. Suddenly, the World Trade Center collapsed due to the force of Bane's strike.
"What should we do, Mr. President?" asked a secret service guy.
"Let's blame the Middle East!" said Bush.
When the smoke cleared, Cheese was no more. Bane stood up covered in rubble. Carnage ran toward him.
"Bane!" she exclaimed as she kissed him passionately.
"The winner is Team Nightmare!" exclaimed the bruised announcer. The living audience members cheered. The ref handed Bane the 3rd emerald.
"Let's go." said Bane as he teleported the team home.
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Whoo, longest chapter! Sorry Ceil for the smashing. I couldn't help it. Don't hate me. I'm also sorry if anyone was offended by my 9/11 joke. It won't happen again. Anyway, where will the next emerald lead our heroes? Stay tuned!
