Disclaimer: And today's disclaimer is brought to you by the prime nemesis of the Man of Steel…and no, it's not an Electromagnet. Please welcome Lex Luthor.
Me: Hey. Lex.
Lex: Astounding. You say my name the same way still. With Astonishment. Mixed with a hint of dread and yet, a hopeful finish.
Me: And you got all that from a simple 'Lex'.
Lex: mmhmm. I even sussed your evil plan to make me read the disclaimer to your silly venture. Rest assured, I won't do it.
Me: Is that so really? Why, dare I ask?
Lex: I'm hatching a Super Evil Plan to take over the world! Mua hah hah ah.
Me: Posturing, 7. Plot, 2. Evil laugh, 3. Sheesh, my younger cousin sounds scarier when going Halloween Candy Hunting.
Lex: This plan is a good plan!
Me: Yeah yeah. This and a hundred others. So what's the big idea this time?
Lex: Kryptonite!
Me: *facepalming* Again?
Lex: This time, I have partners….Lois Lane and Victoria's Secret!
Me: You don't mean…
Lex: Oh Yes! The moment the Man of Steel unhooks the Bra of Kryptonite, he will collapse. And then I will capture him. And then I will control the whole world!
Me: Dude. That plan is low. Even for you. Anyway, it's gonna fail in a couple of moments.
Lex: Oh yeah? Why is that?
Me: Answer me this. What is the chemical symbol of Sodium?
Lex: Na.
Me: I bet you can't say it 8 times.
Lex: I bet I can.
Me: then Say it! Out loud…say it!
Lex: Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na…
Me: …and here it comes…
Chorus: *BATMAN*
Batman: It's my turn now!
Lex: Oh man…not this guy again.
Bat: I will defeat you Lex. Do you know why?
Lex: Because you're…
Bat: Because I'm the God-damned Batman!
*begins punching Lex*
Itachi: Baka-author! Where do you keep getting these idiots from?
Me: Why, from the same place I found you Hitachi, the Fosters Home for Imaginary Friends.
Itachi: *eyes widening* really?
Me: Hah No. I got you guys from a list of Pathetic Villains.
Itachi: Did that list also include you? Because you are behaving like one now.
Me: NOOO! How?
Itachi: You don't own DC, Marvel, Naruto , The Endless or anything else. Yet you sally forth and make innocent characters dance to your tunes. If that's not evil, what is?
Me: Unattractive Friends of Hot Women in a bar. They are the evilest thing invented by anyone.
Itachi: Can't debate that…but now I suppose you want me to make you an offer.
Me: Yesss…my preciousss….it's an offer I won't refuse.
Itachi: Eternal Summer will cost you a Starring Role for me.
Me: Sure sure, you are making an appearance in the next chapter anyway.
Itachi: All right then. Enjoy Eternal Summer Warren-Sherman. Tsukuyomi !
Present Time, 2330 hours. Hokage's Tower
The Hokage's Tower was always a heavily guarded institution. It was designed to resist infiltration and assassination attempts on the Hokage. This security had become even more stringent since the Uchihas had regained their old post as the Village Police, with Sasuke Uchiha being the only member currently. He had taken the job of guarding his best friend's life very seriously, and had closed as many holes as humanly possible in his security. What he hadn't planned for, was Konohamaru's determined ingenuity.
Konohamaru had begun his infiltration at 10 in the night, when the shops had started to close and the clerks and other such workers were turning in for the night. He had remained hidden in the Missions Office, disguised as a Scroll. And when the ANBUs had come for a ritualistic sweep, he had used a chakra-nullifying seal taught to him by Naruto to evade detection. As night fell, and one by one, the floors of the tower started emptying, the Scarfed Jounin began his self-imposed mission in the earnest.
Taking care not to trip up the numerous traps and alarms embedded, he nimbly ran across walls, all those lessons by Ebisu on physical fitness, with exercises taking place in sun-kissed orchards, now paying off. Lightly panting, he crouched low, hiding in the shadows, careful not to make a single sound. It was vexing, not being able to use Chakra but there was nothing to do for it. The numerous seals would immediately set off an alarm the minute he used Chakra. Holding on to the small ridges on the walls with his fingertips, he shimmied across the floor to land in front of the door to his Destination. The Records Room.
Picking the admittedly flimsy lock guarding the files and dossiers lying within, Konohamaru made a mental note to tell his Niisan to change it at first opportunity. With a small click, the lock broke open. Taking a deep breath, he opened the doors with a quick movement, and then sat still, waiting for the arrival of guardian ANBUs. When none were forthcoming, he quickly rolled inside, closing the doors behind him. Once he was inside, the youngest Sarutobi finally breathed easy, and started browsing through the stacks in the dim moonlight.
The task was menial, yet too slow. The Records Room had diligently maintained files on all the Shinobis employed in the Forces, since the time of the Shodaime. This translated to hundreds of files, some crumbling and decaying, strewn haphazardly in an unorganized pile. Finally after an hour of searching, he came across the Dossier he had infiltrated his Nii-san's Tower for. The Dossier on Togieka Haruki.
With trembling hands, he undid the piece of string holding the file in place, and turned the cover only to growl lowly in annoyance. The File was Fire-marked. Meaning that, it was a Hokage-only file and not meant for perusal by just anyone. What was worse was that the original file was kept securely inside the Sanctum Sanctorum, the Chamber of the Hokage. Slapping a hand to his forehead, Konohamaru considered his options. On one hand, it was foolhardy to even try breaking in there. The consequences would not be pleasant, no matter his relationship with Naruto. On the other hand, he had come all this way searching for answers; he did not want to back down now. After a few minutes of thinking and planning, Konohamaru reached a decision. No turning back.
Getting to the top floor was not easy, yet not too difficult for one who grew up traipsing through these very floors, first as a little kid playing with his grandfather. And then as a young ninja, advising and being advised by his surrogate brother. After some time of careful maneuvering and hiding, Konohamaru had reached his destination. There were no preambles now, no nervousness, as a cold cloak descended on his mind, the cloak he wore all the time during missions or when doing anything momentous or dangerous. As Haruki-sama had said once in his Rulebook, 'This Cold Cloak of Logic and Determination is all the Armor that a Shinobi needs, or ever requires. A Shinobi wearing this Cloak is nigh-on undefeatable. For he knows your weakness and knows how to exploit them, as well as his weaknesses and knows how to avoid them. And he will never back down.' This was one advice that Konohamaru had never forgotten.
Unscrewing the door's hinges was easy. Finding the hidden cabinet in the room was even easier. It was the lock that stumped him. For it was not an ordinary one, it was more of a box than a lock, covered in seal arrays and spiral Kanji, guarding the contents of the Cabinet behind them. Flummoxed, the young Jounin began to think of what possibly might be the key. It wouldn't be a physical Key, Naruto-niisan got in too many battles to risk losing it, nor would it be a puzzle. His niisan lacked the patience to solve one each time he needed to open the cabinet. It must be a Jutsu, but not one that anyone could learn. A wide grin spread across his face as he processed this idea. Slipping his index finger inside the Box/Lock, he whispered Rasengan, forming a small swirling ball of blue Chakra on the tip of his finger. The spiraling Chakra lighted up the seal array inscribed in the box, making them glow with a dim blue light, which soon died down with a hiss, making the cabinet door behind it swing open.
Among the numerous Confiscated items and details of classified missions, the black colored file sat innocently. Incongruous in its appearance, only marked with a orange-colored symbol of Konoha. Stamped on it was the same strange symbol he had come to associate with Haruki-sama, the triangle with a bisected circle inside it, though he didn't know what it meant. Gingerly, he brought the file out, and sat near a windowsill to read. He knew it was dangerous, but taking the file out of the office would be treason. Contrary to his expectations, the first page was blasé enough.
In response to Report No. 27B233. Report Submitted by Morino Ibiki.
Subject: Conclusions to the interview with the Individual found at the Affected Area.
Name: Harry James Potter
Age: N/A (appears 25-26. Claims to be immortal)
Height: 5' 9"
Appearance: Messy Black Hair, Green Eyes, Fair Skinned. Slender built. Has a distinctive Scar on his forehead in the shape of a thunderbolt)
First Contact: On the 7th day of the Huntress Moon, Season of the Spring, a loud explosion was registered on the outskirts of the western forest. A team of Chunnins was sent to investigate. The team returned with the individual in tow, who was waiting for them, and surrendered politely. He was then debriefed by Ibiki, who while skeptic of his claims accepted his request to send a message to me expressing his desire for a meeting.
The meeting was enlightening and informative. The individual displayed an aptitude for the Mental Arts as he showed me some of his experiences in an effort to convince me of the truth of his claim. Also worth mentioning is that he carries a formidable arsenal of weapons through unknown means. I speculate that it's a storage seal tattooed on his skin. It's safe to assume he has several other talents as well.
After interviewing the subject for several hours, I find myself leaning towards believing him. He has been nothing if not courteous and polite. He displays a casual aura of authority and power, and yet has been peaceable and earnest. Taking this into consideration, I made him an offer of proving his worth by running the Gauntlet in the next Jounin trials. An offer that he accepted. If he succeeds, I will grant him his wish of joining the Shinobi Forces. The rank will be given at my discretion.
If nothing else, we will gain a powerful new Shinobi for our ranks.
Signed
Sarutobi Hiruzen
Sandaime Hokage
Konohamaru flipped through the pages irritably. He had guessed as much about Haruki-sama. His title of Haruki-no-Shinigami was rather telling anyway. And his victories in the Gauntlet, the Battle of the Rice Fields, Kirigakure were well documented and diligently studied by academy children all across the elemental nations. He finally came across a handwritten page that looked promising. It was written in Haruki's own hand.
4 days to the Killing Moon, the Season of the Autumn
I always marvel at the beauty of Nature. It's so subtle…and yet teaches us lessons in even the smallest things. Ever thrown a stone in a silent lake? Even a small stone can agitate and make ripples in still waters. The larger the stone, the larger the consequent waves. So it was with the Endless. I suppose it all began with The Prodigal. The Lord of Destruction. He was the first to abandon his duties. In his opinion, the Lord's Creation was more than capable of destroying themselves without him being needed. So he left, leaving behind a fracture with his siblings. Things stayed quiet yet uneasy for a few centuries until the Capture and subsequent Imprisonment of Morpheus, the Dream Lord. His return exposed the greatest strength as well as the greatest failing of the Endless: Their inability to change. They are fixed, and cannot change without destroying what they originally were. So it was with the Dream Lord. He changed from the callous, cold personality he had earlier to something resembling warmth and genuine kindness. He started to redress old wounds and correcting the wrongs he had wrought. He rescued an old love from the depths of hell, and challenged the former Morningstar for her freedom, and another from a greedy writer who was subjecting her to inhuman torture for his own gratification. He tried to build bridges with his frequently-at-war siblings, and even helped the youngest, Delirium, to seek out the Prodigal. Sometime during this, he found his Scion. An heir, who would take his place after his demise. For he knew that he had changed too much, and could not change anymore without destroying his identity. Finally, when all his debts were paid for, and all the pieces were in position, he let loose a complex chain of events which culminated in his demise at the hands of his sole beloved sister, Death. Soon after, his Scion ascended the Throne as the new Lord of Dreams. A kinder, politer, more cautious aspect of the original Dream Lord.
It was during this time that Destruction departed the Mortal Realms altogether, which had the unforeseen consequence that all his aspects, present in all the planes began to run amok, without a Will guiding them, upsetting the fragile balance on which Creation hangs. These events shook the Endless considerably, and one by one, they started to seek out their own Scions, in the event of the end of their Existence.
Delirium was the next to find one, Wade Wilson, a former Mercenary as delusional as she. A perfect match if I have ever seen one. Soon after, I passed my trials and was chosen by Death. While I was still in the mortal realm, I always thought my Title was literal, that I was the Master of Death. I couldn't be more wrong. Maybe once, when the Scion of Destruction is found, and Death feels no longer bound to serve her duties, I will be the next Death. It feels bloody strange just thinking that someday this will come to pass.
But till then, here I am. Traipsing through realms in the multiverse, seeking out the Scions of the Endless. I come across a few from time to time, but none have so far acquitted themselves well enough to be one. Sometimes I meet Old Wade in my travels, other times I run a few favors for the Lightbringer and the rest of her posse. A few rare times Elaine has helped me to find love, at least for a little while…I hope Fleur won't begrudge me that.
I don't know when this will all end, but I know whenever it does, it will not be an end, just the start of the next great adventure. Not bad for an underfed kid from Surrey eh?
Konohamaru's head was spinning from the information, while it answered some questions he had, it raised many others. Scions, the Endless, it was all too much to take in. But before he could browse further, a hand descended on the pages, covering them up. Suddenly fearful, Konohamaru looked up, only to gaze into the Cerulean eyes of his Idol, Naruto.
"Well, Saru-chan. What do you have to say for yourself? Helping yourself to state secrets?"
Konohamaru was still frozen and could only shake his head. Naruto looked disapproving and then just sighed.
"Baka. I keep forgetting how similar to me you are, never could wait patiently for something. What will I do with you Konohamaru?"
"You could just let me go Oyabun. That you can do."
"Hn. Dobe-sama is likely to do that. Naruto, give him to me. A few weeks in the holding cells will do him good." Came the voice of Sasuke Uchiha from behind Naruto.
Naruto wryly replied, "Never did me any good. But I can't just let this go Maru. What will it take for you to stop pursuing this matter anymore? "
"You could always tell me some more about him."
"Hmm," Naruto pondered, "I suppose I can do that. But there is one condition."
"What is it Oyabun? I'll agree to anything!"
"You will under no circumstance try to enter here again. I am being serious now. If it was someone other than you, I would have had them sent for a session at the T&I."
The youngest Sarutobi gulped at that. "Understood, Hokage-sama." He choked out.
"Now that that's done with, I suppose I can tell you a couple of stories about him. Have you heard about his actions during the Chuunin Exams? I thought not, they were pretty covert. Well as it happened…"
That's it for now...it's a bit late, and i just got back my net connection. it's admittedly short...but a 7k chapter is already waiting in the wings to be relased before the weekend.
Over and out.
