Chapter 8: Smashers vs. PURIST


Somewhere inside the department store, Ganondord and Man From Hell are facing off. "Hell Punch!" shouts MFH as he throws a fiery punch forward.

"Warlock Punch!" yells Ganondorf, performing his powerful dark punch attack. Both their fists come in contact with each other and release a large amount of energy that causes nearby objects to rip apart, not to mention MFH getting sent flying backwards at high speed.

He keeps on flying until he crashes into a cabinet of chinaware. "Heh! Looks like you are at much lower league than me," says Ganondorf. "This shouldn't be a long fight."

"Hell! You better not underestimate me!" growls MFH. "I am a hell lot stronger than the other members you met!"

"What's the difference?"

"The hell you'll see!" says MFH, and fire covers his entire body. "Behold the powers I got from hell! Hell Bird!" He launches forward like a fiery bird and attempt to ram into Ganondorf.

"Powers from hell, eh? I used to have powers similar to that too," says Ganondorf as he takes out his katana blade. When MFH got near, Ganondorf thrusts his sword forward in hope of stabbing him, but MFH flew upwards in the last moment and dodged the attack. Ganondorf looks up and sees him flying around like a bird. "Uh huh… Cool move you got."

"Hell Dive!" yells MFH, and he drops down in flames towards Ganondorf. Ganondorf quickly hop out of the way and MFH crashes through the floor instead.

"Miss me!" says Ganondorf. "Huh?" The floor underneath him bursts open and MFH shoots back up, hitting him from below and knocking him onto the floor. "Ugh! That sure got me by surprise!"

MFH flies up into the air and attempts for another dive attack. Ganondorf grabs his sword and readies it as he comes charging towards him. "Not going to run this time," he says to himself.

When MFH is about to hit him, Ganondorf swings his sword and knocks him off course and crashing onto the floor. "Argh! That hurts like hell!" cries MFH, clutching his wounded shoulder.

"Do not think I will take it easy on you!" says Ganondorf with a wicked smile. "Though I'm no longer the evil king, I still fight like one!"

"You not seen my hellish powers yet!" says MFH. He raises his hand and fire begins gathering on it. "Hellfire!'

-

On the other side of the store, Link and Woo Fan-Yi are fighting furiously. Fan-Yi jabs with his spear rapidly against Link's shield. Luckily, the shield is very tough and won't break easily, but Link is having a hard time standing due to the force of the impact against it. "Whoa! This guy sure is crazy!" Link thought.

Fan-Yi pulls back his spear and thrusts it forward with lots of power, and the impact against the shield sends Link flying backwards and crashing into several cabinets.

CRASH!

"Ow…" groans Link. He sees Fan-Yi charging towards with his spear pointing forward, so Link quickly rolls aside in time to avoid the blow, and then tries to hit Fan-Yi.

Fan-Yi turned around fast and clash weapons with Link, and they begin swinging and hitting with their weapons furiously and noisily.

CLANG! CLASH!

During the midst of this fight, Link quickly pulls out a bomb and hurls it into the air above Fan-Yi, which caught his attention and Link uses this chance to get away. As the bomb drops back down, Fan-Yi uses his spear to bat the bomb towards Link! "What the?!" gasps Link, and he quickly jumps out of the bomb's path as it explodes.

BOOOOOM!

"Whoa! This guy is reckless!" he thought.

"不管你用什麼招術都對我沒用的," says Fan-Yi.
T: No matter what techniques you use against me, it's useless.

"Can't you speak in language that I can understand better?" asks Link, annoyed.

"我沒是為怎麼要讓自己的語言被翻譯?" replies Fan-Yi. "我最討厭個! 被翻譯過的字聽起來跟原來的發音都不一樣! 著真是一個侮辱!"
T: Why should I allow my language to be translated? I hate it! Translated words sound nothing like the original! This is such an insult!

"Guess it is useless talking to you…"

Fan-Yi charges forward and thrust his spear again, but Link swiftly steps to the side to dodge the blow and then tries to take on Fan-Yi from the side. Fan-Yi acted fast and spins around and hits Link in the waist using the side of his spear, making him crash into a store window, but not breaking it. While Link is struggling to get up, Fan-Yi wastes no time in striking with his spear. Link quickly rolls aside to avoid the fatal blow and Fan-Yi misses and stabs through the window and into a mannequin instead.

Link got to safety and stands back up. "Phew, that was close!" he says. He feels cold air on his head and reaches his hand there to touch it, and notices that his hat is gone! "Hey! Where's my hat?!"

Fan-Yi pulls out his spear, along with the mannequin, and Link notices his hat stuck on the spear! "Hey! There's my hat!" says Link. "Give it back!"

Fan-Yi swings his spear against the air and shakes out the mannequin, which flies towards Link. Link uses his sword to cut the mannequin in half and dashes towards Fan-Yi. "Give me back my hat!" he shouts.

Fan-Yi steps to the side and Link runs past him instead, and then he impales Link through his right shoulder. "Ugh!"

Then Fan-Yi lifts him in the air using the spear and spins him around like a lasso before Link goes flying off and crashing into several cabinets. "Ugh! It hurts…" he groans painfully while clutching his hand on the huge wound inflicted on the right shoulder.

"你打敗不了我的," says Fan-Yi as he approaches Link. "死吧!"
T: You cannot defeat me. Die!

-

In yet another part of the store, Mewtwo is facing off with Hatey-Hate. "Go and kill that hateful being!" Hatey-Hate says to the controlled kid.

"Die!" shouts the kid as he runs towards Mewtwo while flailing his arms wildly.

Mewtwo easily evades the kid by floating around, though the kid kept on following him. "This kid isn't worth fighting at all," he thought. "Plus, he's being controlled, so I must be careful not to kill him."

"Die!" shouts the kid as he hurls himself towards Mewtwo. Mewtwo flicks his finger in the air and the kid is sent flying backwards.

CRASH!

"Too easy," says Mewtwo, but he sees the kid getting up again. "Not down yet?"

"Die, Sony fanboys! Muahahahahahaha!" laughs the kid evilly.

Mewtwo uses telekinesis to hurl the kid away, but the kid keeps on coming back. "I must not kill him!" thought Mewtwo. "I must break him out of that villain's control first!" He turns to Hatey-Hate and glares at him.

"You dare come after me even though someone is already challenging you?" asks Hatey-Hate. "I hate you for doing this!"

Mewtwo charges up shadow ball and hurls it at him, but Hatey-Hate quickly jumps away to avoid it and lands perfectly on the floor.

"He's pretty swift for an old man," thought Mewtwo.

"Go get him, my puppet!" Hatey-Hate commands the kid.

"Die, Sony fanboys!" says the kid as he goes after Mewtwo.

"No! Go away!" Mewtwo tells the kid.

The kid jumps at Mewtwo and grabs onto his body and repeatedly pounds him while chanting, "Die! Die! Die!"

Mewtwo easily shakes him off and fires a beam from his eye at him. "Disable!" But to his surprise, the kid did not stop moving! "What?! He didn't stop?! The power of the mind control is powerful!"

"Unless you shut off the source of the mind control, you cannot hope to free the kid!" says Hatey-Hate.

"Then I'll have to destroy you first!" says Mewtwo, turning to the evil old man. "The staff… That's it! The staff! It's the source of the mind control!" Mewtwo charges up a shadow ball and hurls it Hatey-Hate, aiming for the staff. The old man quickly jumps away to avoid the attack.

"You cannot hope to hit me with moves like that!" says Hatey-Hate. "That is why I hate you!"

"Then take this! Swift!" Mewtwo points out his hand and shoots out several star-shaped beams. Hatey-Hate once again avoids it, but to his surprise, the beams follow after him! "You cannot escape the homing capabilities of Swift!"

Hatey-Hate keeps on jumping around swiftly to avoid getting hit by the stars. He finally stops jumping and says, "I really hate homing attacks! But if it is the staff you're only going after, then it is useless!" He holds up his staff in front of him and lets the star-shaped beams hit it.

"Yes!" exclaims Mewtwo. But to his surprise, the staff is not destroyed! "What?!"

"The power of the Darkling, Hater, cannot be destroyed by means of normal attacks!" says Hatey-Hate.

"Darkling?!" gasps Mewtwo in huge shock.

-

KABOOOOOOOM!!!!!!

"Yaaaaaaaaaaaa!" screams Ganondorf as he is hurled by the explosion off the balcony and falling to the lowest floor. He hits the floor hard but somehow survives. A fall like this would've killed someone. "Ow… That move was dangerous!"

Man From Hell appears from over the balcony and jumps into the air and fire covers his body. "Hell Dive!" He drops downwards in flames and attempt to hit Ganondorf, but he quickly dodged the attack and MFH hits the floor instead, leaving behind a large crater. MFH gets up and shoots towards him again like a rocket. "Hell Bird!"

Ganondorf jumps to the side to avoid the attack and MFH makes a u-turn in air and tries to take on him again. "I'm not going to run this time!" says Ganondorf angrily. "You've really pissed me off! Gerudo Dragon!" He performs a running uppercut and hits MFH in the head, making him flinch and falling onto the floor a few yards away. "There!" Then Ganondorf hears someone screaming, and he looks up and sees Link falling down! Link falls down on top of him and they both collapse onto the floor. "Ooch! What are you doing, Link?"

"I had no choice but to jump down…" replies Link painfully. "That guy I was fighting sure did a critical wound on me."

"It's not like you to fall to something like this! You're so different ever since you took anger management class!"

"Don't insult me…"

Fan-Yi jumps down from the higher floor balcony and to the lowest floor and accompanies MFH. "你沒事吧, 兄弟?" Fan-Yi asks him.
T: Are you all right, brother?
Note: Brother here means 'close relationship friend' rather than blood-related brothers.

"Yeah, I'm hella all right," replies MFH. "That hell of a guy is hella annoying, but it seems he can't take my hellish powers much longer."

Ganondorf hears this and turns his attention to him. "So you think I cannot withstand your hellish powers? How am I the king of evil if I cannot stand hell? I tell you the truth: I am hell itself!"

"Then show me the hell your powers!" says MFH. "See if you can take this hellish attack the second time! Hellfire!" He raises his hands and they begin to glow, and then he points them forward and shoots out a large blast of fire.

"What is that?!" gasps Link.

"He used that move to blast me to this floor earlier," answers Ganondorf. "But this time, he's not going to succeed! I shall show him why I am hell itself!"

"Oh no! You're not thinking of changing into…"

"No, silly! Not that! Why would I waste my power changing into Ganon? Plus, it will do no good to my mind also! Just see what I have in store for that guy!"

As the blast of fire approaches, Ganondorf lifts up both his hands and they glow with purple energy, and he slams both hands into the floor. "Dark Wave!" Then a large wave made of black energy is created and travels forward like that of a tsunami. The black wave overcomes and consumes the blast of fire and continues moving towards the two PURIST members.

"What the hell?!" gasps MFH.

The blade wave hits both MFH and Fan-Yi and sends them both crashing backwards.

CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!!!!!!!

After the black energy disappeared, everything is in ruins and Link's expression is like totally freaked out. "Whoa! That was something!" he exclaims.

"Now you know why I am hell itself?" asks Ganondorf.

MFH gets back up and growls, "Argh! What the hell was that move just now? I'm going to show you even more hellish powers!"

"我絕對不會敗在這種絕招下的!" says Fan-Yi.
T: I will not be defeated by this kind of attack!

"Still not defeated yet?" asks Link. "Then I will show you my power also! The power of the Triforce of Courage!"

"放馬過來吧!" says Fan-Yi.
T: Bring it on!

The Triforce symbol on Link's hand begins glowing, and he shoots forward at a really fast speed.

"真快!" gasps Fan-Yi. He thrusts his spear forward to hit Link, but Link zipped out of the way as fast as a blink of an eye. "什麼?!" He quickly turns around just in time to see Link standing behind him, but is too late do avoid what is coming next.
T: So fast! What?!

"Triforce Slash!" yells Link, and then he slashes Fan-Yi's body over and over at a super fast speed.

SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH!

"阿!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
T: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Note: In Chinese, screams are only one word but you pronounce it very long, just like in English.

Link stops slashing and Fan-Yi falls onto the floor. "You son of hell!" growls MFH angrily when he saw this.

"You'll be joining your friend too!" says Ganondorf. "Dark Rain!" He creates a large ball of energy and it explodes into smaller energies which fly into the sky and rains back down.

The energy rain falls on top of Man From Hell and creates several explosions.

BANG! KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!

When the dark rain finally ends, MFH is lying all burned up on the floor.

"We did it!" exclaim the two Smashers.

"Well, looks like you didn't need my help," says a voice behind them.

"Actually, we're here for someone else," says another voice.

Ganondorf and Link turn around to see who was talking. "You two?"

-

On the other hand…

"The power of the Darkling…" gasps Mewtwo. "I will not be able to defeat him without my Holy Weapon!"

"Long have I worshipped Darkling and long have I been rejected because of this," says Hatey-Hate. "This is the reason I hate those justice doers, for they think that one do not have the right to worship what they want! Darkling worshipping is my religion, and yet they do not accept this! That is why I hate anyone who does not accept my religion!"

"No wonder people do not like you!" says Mewtwo. "Darkling is the evil incarnation of the world and they are responsible for the Great War 1000 years ago! Anything related to those evil beings should not exist in this world!"

"I hate you! You do not understand my feelings and devotions towards the Darkling! I worship the one and only Hater, one of the 7 Deadly Incarnations! He is my only god and I worship him only!"

"You're mad! Nobody would want to serve such an evil being!"

"Sacrilege! What you have said is sacrilege! I shall smite you down with the power of hatred! Go and kill him, my puppet!"

Under Hatey-Hate's command, the kid grabs a knife and charges at Mewtwo while chanting, "Die! Die! Sony fanboys die!"

Mewtwo flies around swiftly to avoid the kid and careful not to kill him. This kept up for a while and Mewtwo is starting to get frustrated. "Argh! Things will go nowhere if I don't do something! Looks like I have no choice but to smite down this kid!"

"Leave this to me!" says a voice.

Mewtwo turns to the source of voice and sees Falco and Ness. "You two!"

"Right, it is I!" says Falco. "Looks like you cannot do anything without my help!"

"Stop talking like you're the only person here!" Ness says to Falco. "Don't forget about me!"

"What are you two doing here?" asks Mewtwo.

"I have a score to settle with someone I fought in the Forbidden Realm," replies Falco.

"Something told me that we would encounter someone familiar here," says Ness. "I told Falco about this possibility and then we came here with our Holy Weapons. Looks like we are right after all! Hater, one of the 7 Deadly Incarnations, is here!"

"It's more like this old man is using the power of Hater," Mewtwo tells him. "I can't believe he has the power of a Darkling!"

"Therefore you need my help!" says Falco, holding up his Atomic Gun.

"I said to stop talking like you're the only person here!" Ness tells him. "You're too filled with pride!"

"Let's go teach that old man a lesson!" says Falco, ignoring Ness's words.

"Die!" shouts the kid as he runs towards them with two knives in his hand.

"Watch out! That kid is being controlled by Hatey-Hate!" Mewtwo tells them. "We must destroy his staff in order to free his mind!"

"That would be nothing!" says Falco. He fires a beam from his Atomic Gun at Hatey-Hate, who sees this coming and quickly avoids it.

"I hate the Holy Weapons! It is the only thing that can destroy my Darkling powers!" says Hatey-Hate angrily.

Ness runs towards Hatey-Hate and swings his Ultimate Bat, and Hatey-Hate blocks it using his staff. "You think you're safe like this?" asks Ness. He pulls back his bat and swings it hard, knocking Hatey-Hate onto his back and his staff flying into the air.

"Now's the chance!" says Falco. He fires at the staff and shatters it into pieces, and the kid comes back to his sense.

"Huh? What have I been doing?" he asks.

"Get out of here before you get yourself into danger, kid!" Mewtwo tells him, so the kid quickly runs off.

"What have you done?!" growls Hatey-Hate angrily.

"We just freed the kid," says Ness. "Now is your turn to get beaten!"

"Give up now, old man!" says Falco. "You cannot defeat me!"

"You have not seen my true powers yet! The power of the Darkling has already infused into my body! You shall see my super power that nobody has survived!" says Hatey-Hate. He lifts up his hands and an aura appears around him.

"That aura… So powerful…" gasps Mewtwo.

"I don't care what you're going to do, because I'm going to kill you before you do anything!" says Falco.

"Absolute Hatred!" shouts Hatey-Hate loudly, and his hair sticks up and sways around in air as the aura around him becomes reddish color, and then he begins chanting loudly in his mouth, "HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Augh! Why is my body feeling much pain?!" cries Falco as he clutches his head.

"Me too!!!" cries Ness.

"He's using his ultimate attack our minds!!" replies Mewtwo in pain. "This is terrible!"

Hatey-Hate continues to scream out loudly, "HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

-

"Ugh! What is that?!" cries Ganondorf.

"My head! It's going to explode!" cries Link, covering his ears.

-

"HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" shouts Hatey-Hate continuously. This makes someone from Final Fantasy 6 jealous...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" screams Ness in great pain. "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!" And his ears begin bleeding. "MY EARS!!!!!!!!"

"Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!! This is too much for me!!!!!!!!" cries Mewtwo as he rolls around on the floor.

The power of the Absolute Hatred is so great that the walls being breaking down and the ceilings tumble down.

"Somebody shut him up!!!!" shouts Falco. "Level up!!!!!!" At this, his Atomic Gun transforms into a bazooka. Falco tries to endure the power of the Absolute Hatred and places the bazooka on his shoulder and fires a humongous blast at Hatey-Hate.

"HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" continues shouting Hatey-Hate. Unknown to him, the huge blast pierces through the aura and blasts him right in the face.

KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally, the Absolute Hatred has stopped and Hatey-Hate is standing there, all burned up. A few seconds later, he falls over unconscious.

"Phew… At last…" says Ness. "My ears really bled…"

"It did quite a damage to my brain…" says Mewtwo. "I can still feel the pain."

"Heh heh! It was because of my great power that he was defeated!" boasts Falco.

"Thanks for coming to help," Mewtwo says to them both. "Without your helps, I wouldn't be able to defeat him. I still find it hard to believe that there are people who worship Darkling."

-

Meanwhile, Captain Falcon is still standing at where he is, staring down into Bob's eyes. And the breeze blows pass…


TO BE CONTINUED…

Man From Hell: Representation of the devil itself. To us Christians, Satan is the ultimate evil who challenges God and tries to drag us down to hell by making us do things that displeases God.

Woo Fan-Yi: Representation of people who are against translations for unknown reasons. This is the most common case in animes, where hardcore fans seem to go enrage when the dubbed version translate some Japanese terms. For example, many Naruto fans were enraged when Kage Bushin No Jutsu was called Shadow Clone Jutsu in the dub. They just cannot get it through their thick skulls that Shadow Clone Justu is the same meaning as Kage Bunshin No Jutsu, but translated. It seems that these people hate their own language…

Hatey-Hate: Representation of hatred. Perhaps the biggest darkness in human heart and that is hatred. Showing absolute no love, respect, or concern at all and acting cold before the hated one. There are many reasons for hatred, and I think it is only all right to hate something if the reason is good enough, like you hate a person because he/she is a dangerous person and threatens and harms the life of people. But I do not think it is right to hate something for no good reason. It is especially common in THAT website.

Trivia:
1. Woo Fan-Yi's name means "No Translation".
2. Dark Wave is a move made up by Nintendogeek, an author in this site.
3. Below are the Chinese names for the Smashers, both the Chinese characters and the pronunciation, and also a meaning if there is one.
Mario – 瑪莉歐 – MA-LI-O
Peach – 蘑菇公主 – MUO-GU-GONG-ZU (Toadstool Princess)
Bowser – 庫巴 – KOO-BA (Koopa)
Luigi - 路奇 – LOO-CHI
Dr. Mario - 瑪莉歐博士 - MA-RI-O BUO-SOO (Mario Doctor)
Link – 林克 – LIN-KUH
Zelda – 莎爾達 – SA-UR-DA
Young Link – 少年林克 – SAO-NIEN LIN-KUH (Youth Link)
Ganondorf – 加南杜洛夫 – JIA-NAN-DU-RUO-FU
Donkey Kong – 大金剛 – DA-JIN-GHANG (Big King Kong)
Yoshi - 龍龍 – LONG-LONG (Dragon Dragon)
Pikachu – 皮卡丘 – PI-KA-CHIO
Jigglypuff – 胖丁 – PANG-DIN
Pichu -皮丘 – PI-CHIO
Mewtwo – 超夢 – TSAO-MONG
Fox – 狐狸 – HOO-LEE (Fox)
Falco – 法爾康 – FA-UR-KANG
Popo – 波波 – PUO-PUO
Nana – 娜娜 – NA-NA
Kirby – 卡比 – KA-BI
Mr. Game & Watch – Game & Watch 先生 – SHIEN-SUN (G&W's name is still pronounced in English, the last two characters means 'Mister')
Marth – 瑪爾夫 – MA-UR-FU
Roy – 羅易 – LUO-YI
Captain Falcon – 鐵鷹隊長 – TIEH-YIN-DUEY-ZHANG (Metal Falcon Captain)
Samus – 莎姆斯 – SA-MU-SOO
Ness – 尼斯 – NI-SOO
Wario – 壞瑪莉 – HUAI-MA-LI (Bad Mario)
Pit – 彼特 – BI-TUH

Unfortunately, I do not know Sheik, Meta-Knight, and Snake's Chinese names, so I did not provide them here.