Gaahah, has it really been two months? This chapter is long, but that's no excuse. My computer died; that's an excuse, but it's actually been good for me. I find I write faster when I use a plain ol' notebook and a pencil. The next two or three chapters are either written or heavily outlined, so you can expect a much sorter wait for those, I think.
Thank you everyone for your lovely encouraging reviews! I promise I will never abandon this story. It may take me a while to finish, but Inafune as my witness, it WILL get done.
Rockman, Roll, and all these other lovely things belong to Capcom. I claim nothing.
It was true; when looking for sheets for the crib Meiru-chan had picked out, Roll had picked her own favorite. And maybe she'd mentioned it to Rockman.
Thump-thump-thump.
It was also true that they'd become very good at working as a team in the two years of their Operator's married life. So it was perfectly normal for Rockman to notice a difference in her and to complain about her increasing absence in the team.
Thump-thump-thump.
It was also true that she'd made no effort to hide her feelings for Rockman when she was younger; she used to cling to him like a koala whenever she got the chance. And so maybe when trying to put a little distance between them, it had seemed like a one-eighty degree shift in her attitude to Rockman.
Even so...
Thump-thump-thunk!
A metallic crash jarred Roll out of her thoughts. The sewing machine, which she was operating, had gone past the end of the fabric it was hemming. The needle was going up and down through nothing, and with the sudden loss of tension the bobbin thread was starting to tangle up. Roll shut off the machine quickly, hoping the needle hadn't picked up too many extra threads.
"I'm done with this seam, Meiru-chan," she announced.
Meiru did not look up from her sewing instructions. "Okay, I think—" the newspaper instructions folded in on themselves, obscuring the part Meiru was looking at. She frowned, smoothed down the paper again, and after skimming the page flipped it over to read the backside. "I think we just need to sew the bib to the skirt. We've hemmed all the edges, right?"
"Right," Roll confirmed.
"Okay, let me just… sort this out and... Where are—aie! Stupid pins..."
Three things had led to today's sewing experiment:
One; school had ended for the Summer holidays this week. Meiru no longer had a job and, unfortunately, did not have a return in the fall to look forward to as the school had, in their own words, "temporarily" let her go.
Two; both Meiru and Roll thought that Nanette's apron was cute.
Three; on Meiru's last attempt to make her mother-in-law's meatballs, she had stained her only apron beyond repair with tomato sauce. Bored, needing a new apron, and knowing what kind she wanted but not able to find one cheap enough, Meiru had reluctantly opened the sewing machine that had not been touched since it was thrown against a wall.
So far, it was proving to be more difficult than either of them had thought it would be. But they kept at it; being forced to concentrate on sewing, neither could think about their respective problems. A sewing machine needle wasn't nearly as deadly as a Roll Arrow, but it was violent enough for Roll to count it as a form of stress relief.
Roll sighed. It felt as though her fighting spirit was dying a little more every day. Why else would she have accepted Rockman's plea to stay? After years of hopes and dreams getting crushed by his ignorance of her feelings, a tiny, pathetic, "I don't want you to leave," was hardly enough to make up for all of that. Plus, it had made things about fifty times more awkward between them. "I don't want you to leave" told Roll one thing: Rockman wanted to be near her. It did not tell her why he wanted her to stay, what his feelings were for her, or what exactly they should do now that she wasn't leaving.
Leaving; what an odd choice of words. Where would she go? Their Operators lived together, and so they themselves often had to work together. There was no way Roll could lock herself up in her PET and avoid Rockman for the rest of her life. It was impossible.
"I don't want you to leave."
No, what was impossible was Rockman saying something like that. After years of hopes and dreams getting crushed by his ignorance of her feelings, Roll had become (or was trying to become) more realistic about the situation. It was unlikely that Rockman would ever notice her feelings, and there was no way that he could feel the same way back. He didn't love her, and it was a childish fantasy to think he'd just "wake up" one day and realize his love for her. It was silly to hope that. Stupid. Out of the question. Impossible.
…and yet, that was exactly what had happened last week. Almost, anyway; Roll was very conscious of the fact that he had not used the word "love". He'd said "like" and "important", but not "love".
In fact, very little had changed in this last week. She and Rockman had gone back to their usual routine of goodbye in the morning and hello in the evening… and maybe Rockman started up conversations a bit more… and was a bit more attentive… and friendly…
But that wasn't love, was it?
"Surprise!" Something wrapped around her and squeezed tight.
"EEK!" Roll screamed in shock. She couldn't turn around to face the intruder, and her own arms were pinned, which cut off half of her offensive capabilities. Only half, though; she still had her antennae. "ROLL WHI—!"
"AAH!" The intruder let go, pushed away from her and, from the sound of things, fell to the floor. "I forgot about those!"
It was Rockman; she recognized his voice before she turned around. "Rockman?! What… why...?"
He was sprawled on the floor, propping his upper body up with his elbows. "You missed my nose by a millimeter, Roll-chan!" He gave a breathless chuckle. "You nearly gave me a heart attack! I haven't seen you use Roll Whip in a long time!"
"Gave you a heart attack?! You're the one who snuck up on me!" Roll retorted. Despite her still racing heart and justified anger, she held out a hand to help him up.
He didn't take it; he stood up on his own and brushed himself off. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I thought for sure that you'd notice me before I got to you!" He smiled warmly. "It took me a while to find you, Roll-chan! I thought you and Meiru-chan might have gone out until I heard a funny noise… Are you actually using the sewing machine?"
"Oh, yes," Roll agreed, somewhat distracted his casual manner and smile. "Meiru-chan needed a new apron, so I suggested we make one."
"Aah, I see. She couldn't get the stains out, then?"
"No," she said. Rockman rarely came home during the middle of the day; if he did, he had a good reason. "Rockman, why—"
"Roooll!" The sewing machine had a touch screen on the front of it so that Meiru could input commands (mostly for fancy stitches and embroidery) and so that Roll could look out. Through this screen, Roll watched as Meiru threw her nearly-complete apron to the floor. "It doesn't fit! It ties arou—huh? Rockman?" Her expression changed from annoyance to shock in an instant. "When did you get here? Is Netto okay? What's going on?"
Meiru, like Roll, knew that Rockman did not come home for trivial matters.
"Oh no, Netto-kun is fine," Rockman chuckled, waving his hands in a placating manner. "Nothing is wrong; I just came to see if Roll-chan had some free time."
"Eh?" Roll peeped. He had never asked her this before. "Why?"
"Do you remember that Navi we met last week, Hyacinth-chan? She had her baby today, and Nana-chan asked me if we'd like to see them."
"Oh!" Roll clasped her hands under her chin. "Really?" She had never seen a baby Navi in person before, much less one so newly born. "Have you seen them yet? Is the baby okay? How tiny is it? Ooh, I've only seen pictures, but the real thing must…"
She'd seen pages and pages of pictures; baby Navis were adorable, and the real thing could only be better. Hyacinth was a cute Navi, too. Her offspring, boy or girl, would only benefit from this. Nanette didn't need to ask Roll if she wanted to visit, or rather, ask Rockman. Rockman should know her well enough to know that her answer was a resounding yes.
And maybe, if she was lucky… Even though they'd barely said hello to one another, Hyacinth had given her a good first impression. If she asked nicely and promised to be extra careful, Hyacinth would surely let her hold the baby for a minute.
"Kyaa…" Roll bounced on her heels with pure excitement. "You think she'll let me hold the baby, right Rockman? Right?"
From the look on his face, it was obvious Rockman was fighting a losing battle not to laugh.
"Eh? What's so funny?"
"You h-have… the cutest h-ha… happy dance, Roll-chan."
"Eh?!" Roll stopped her bouncing. She let her hands droop, and felt her shoulders drop as well. Even though Rockman had meant it as a compliment, it didn't feel like one.
"Oh, no! I'm not saying it's a bad thing!" he was quick to add. "It's cute!"
"Cute"… Once upon a time, the implied "you are" before that word would have made her faint dead away. Now, she found it demeaning. She was acting like a hyperactive little girl, which admittedly she used to be when she was younger, but had been working so hard to stop doing over the years.
She crossed her arms with a huff. "I do not think I can go. I am helping Meiru-chan sew, and then—"
"No, go ahead," Meiru said, both interrupting and ruining Roll's attempt to snub Rockman. "There's no reason to finish this thing now."
"Oh! The apron!" Roll gasped. Meiru had been about to say something earlier; she was acting like even more of a child by ignoring her Operator in favor of a petty argument.
Before she could stutter out an apology or ask any questions, Rockman spoke up. "What's wrong, Meiru-chan?"
"It doesn't fit. It's supposed to tie around my waist. I cut out the pattern for my size, but… I'm no longer my normal size," Meiru said. She ran a hand over the growing swell in her stomach. "I don't want to redo it. I probably don't have enough fabric left even if I wanted to…" She blinked hard, exhaled loudly, put her arms akimbo, and turned away in one swift motion. "But it doesn't matter, I'm sure it will look terrible on me anyway."
Oh no, not again…
Roll began to panic. If their first sewing project ended in failure, she was sure Meiru would never want to try sewing again. Meiru hadn't been too emotional throughout her pregnancy, but her weight gain was starting to eat away at her self-confidence. As expected of a first-time pregnancy, Meiru had gone a full five months with hardly a centimeter gained. It was just in this last week her waist had started to expand like a bag of microwave popcorn. Everyone was shocked by the change, but a frantic call to the obstetrician revealed that it was a normal occurrence and had a very appropriate name: "pop". Women could go from their normal size to almost full-term size in a week or two. Needless to say, this was more than a little shocking for Meiru.
"Oh, please don't say that!" said Roll, anxious to put a stop to the impending water works. "You look beautiful! The apron will look fine on you!"
Meiru had been handling things well, even this last week, but there were times when little things (like this) would set her off. Sometimes almost out the blue, she would declare she needed to be alone and would just leave. It wasn't hard for her to escape Roll's worried voice; all she had to do was walk outside without her PET. Even simple, mundane places like three feet out the front door were troubling for Roll. As close as they were, she couldn't follow; they were places only Netto could reach. On two separate bad occasions, Roll actually had to call Netto at work and ask him to come home. He didn't have the time to do this on a daily basis, though, so it was up to Roll to diffuse Meiru's tantrums before they escalated to that point.
"N-no… no it w-won't…"
"Yes it will, please—"
Rockman laughed.
Roll's mouth, open from talking, opened wider. She gaped at Rockman. He was laughing. Laughing at an upset, pregnant woman. This was not the way to cheer her up; this was a surefire way to get beat up.
"What are you talking about?" Rockman said in a far too jovial manner for the matter at hand. "That shade of blue is very pretty on Meiru-chan! It reminds me of the vest you always wore when you were little."
Meiru swiped at her nose. "It… is a similar color, isn't it?" She leaned over and picked her apron up off the floor. The top half (the bib) was still only pinned to the waist and skirt, but it was attached well enough that Meiru could hold it up to herself at its full length.
"It looks very well made," Rockman commented. "I like the ruffle at the bottom! It's cute."
"You think?" Though her voice was still glum, Roll saw Meiru's face brighten at the compliment. "It's not too long?"
"No, knee length is nice," said Rockman. "Try putting it on. If you tie it a bit higher, like an empire waist, will it fit?
Meiru held the bib to her chest using her chin. With a little difficulty, she grasped both of the ribbon ties and knotted them behind her upper back. There wasn't enough excess to tie it in a large bow like the picture on the pattern showed, but it was long enough to make a knot that would stay in place.
"It feels okay," she murmured. She twisted her torso left and right, which made the bottom ruffled hem swish elegantly around her knees.
Roll was mesmerized by the motion. Tying the apron higher up accentuated the new curve of her stomach. The bib, which should be too long and loose when tied at this height, fit perfectly; the excess was filled out by the corresponding increase in her bust size. These two effects put together gave Meiru a beautiful, almost pear-shaped silhouette.
How on earth could Meiru think that her weight gain made her ugly? She was more stunning than Roll could ever recall her looking.
Rockman laughed again. "Give us a spin!" he joked, mimicking the desired motion by twirling a finger in the air.
Roll was suddenly aware of Rockman's crazy tactic; he was acting like Netto. He knew as well as she did that Netto was the only person who could reliably calm Meiru down, and was channeling the essence of Netto to accomplish this himself. It was pure genius.
Meiru complied to his request with a giggle of her own, and spun once on her toes. "Well?" she sing-songed. "What do you think?"
Rockman gave Meiru a serious nod and two big thumbs up. "Niiice."
Roll couldn't hold it in any longer; she broke down laughing. His plan, though genius, was also outlandish. As identical as they could look and behave some days, seeing Rockman mimic his Operator down to even the thumbs up was impressive, almost frightening, and completely out of character. Meiru had picked up on this too; both women cracked up while Rockman scratched a cheek sheepishly.
"Oh..." Meiru gasped, clutching her stomach. "Get going, you two... and say hi to my idiot of a husband, won't you?"
Rockman nodded an affirmative.
"Are you sure?" Roll asked. She had always been nervous about leaving Meiru all alone, and Meiru's pregnancy had multiplied this fear by a factor of ten. "Is there anything I can do before we go? Anything you need? I coul—"
"No. I need nothing. I want nothing. I am not going to do anything strenuous or dangerous. I am not going to pick up any heavy objects. I will not require the services of anything connected to the internet other than the TV, which I can operate myself. I will not require the services of any kitchen appliances, seeing as I made my lunch when I made Netto's this morning." Meiru recited the list without inflection. She'd gone over this list many times. "Did I miss anything?"
It was the first time Rockman had heard it, though. He gave Roll a bemused smile.
"No, I can't think of anything else. Well, all right... if you're sure..." Roll trailed off.
"Okay then! Let's go!" Rockman cheered, setting off towards the glowing portal back into the bedroom computer.
"Okay." Roll shut off the view screen and with a smile of her own fell in step behind him.
It took less than half a minute navigate their way through the computer to their link to the internet.
Rockman stopped just short of the portal. He twisted around. "Roll-chan?"
"I'm right here," she said, stepping up next to him. "What's wrong?"
He answered with a pout that was strongly reminiscent of Netto.
"What?" she repeated. Rockman was being very expressive today; it was unusual for him to act so childlike, even when he was happy.
"Why do you always walk behind me?" he asked.
"Behind?" Roll titled her head in confusion. "I'm following you to SciLabs."
"But I didn't ask you to follow me," Rockman said, "you know the way to SciLabs. I asked you to come with me." He stuck his closest elbow out to her. "Come on."
"Eeh?" Roll felt herself go pink; Rockman had never offered to take her by the arm before, it had always been she who latched onto him.
Rockman didn't seem to think much of his offer or her reaction to it. He just shook his elbow at her, impatient. Torn between embarrassment and immense joy, Roll wrapped her arm around his. They stepped through the portal together.
Out in public, embarrassment won. When they passed the local message board they were spotted by Ramen, a Navi who lived two houses away from their own. He froze halfway through his wave and, though he only paused for a second, Roll knew what he was thinking from the wide grin on his face.
They continued to walk in silence. Roll dreaded getting to Net City; surely they would get all kinds of funny looks and comments there. It would be crowded too, seeing as it was the lunch hour, and—
"Is something wrong, Roll-chan?"
"W-what?!" Roll came back to reality with a jolt. "N-no! Of course not!"
"If you say so..." Rockman did not press the issue. After another minute of silence, he commented, "This is like old times, isn't it?"
Roll knew what he meant; they hadn't walked arm in arm like this since they were children. "Yes, but I've grown up since then, right? I... I didn't jump on you this time."
"Yes, you have," he nodded. "To tell the truth, I always used to be a little embarrassed when you would walk around with me like this." He gave a nervous laugh and scratched at his cheek with his free hand. "But in a way, I liked it too. It is a polite thing to do; I felt like a gentleman escorting a lady."
Somehow, that didn't surprise Roll at all. "You're so old-fashioned!" she laughed. "It's cute."
Rockman shrugged. "I like walking with you; we haven't gone anywhere together in a long time."
Her laughter died in her throat. "O-oh. We… we go places. We went to SciLabs recently, right?"
"No I meant... We used to meet up in Net City all the time. Now we only go there for errands or walk though it to get to SciLabs." His statement was an observation more than a suggestion for change."I guess now that we live in the same house, we don't need to set up times and places to meet."
"No, not really," Roll agreed.
"We still could, though."
"Still could what?"
"Go to Net City sometimes. There's lots of things to do there," said Rockman. "We haven't been to a movie in a long time... Do you want to stop by DigiFilm to see what's playing?"
Roll kept her lips firmly sealed, not trusting them to make coherent noises. Rockman... the one and only Rockman whom she'd loved and worshiped since the day they met... was not only escorting her into Net City of his own volition, but was now asking her to go on date. A date.
"Roll-chan?"
Of course, Roll told herself glumly, he wasn't aware of the implications of his question. Like his operator, he was oblivious to the emotional impact his actions had. Meiru had gone on a full three dates with Netto before he noticed how dressed up and excited she got and figured out what they were really doing.
"I-it's nothing. I'd love to see what movies are out, I haven't been keeping track of that at all lately," she said.
"Okay! We'll take a little detour, then."
Hopefully like Netto, though, Rockman would figure things out. He would decide what "like" and "important" meant, and...
...and in doing so, spend more time with me.
Come to think of it, maybe Rockman had been acting differently this last week. He smiled more. He laughed more. Everyday he had a new, thoughtful question about her day or her life, and was content to just sit back and listen to her answer. He appeared to genuinely enjoy spending time together. If this kept up, then surely... it would lead to...
Cheered by the thought of future possibilities, Roll sped up her pace. "Come on! We have a lot to do!" she smiled, tugging on Rockman's arm.
So far, Roll and Hyacinth were getting along marvelously. After re-introducing themselves, they'd done nothing but talk about and fawn over Hyacinth's new baby.
"And so he said—"
"No!"
"He did!"
"Haha! Oh, oh you can't be serious!"
"I know he's the father, but really! What kind of name is that?"
Rockman found it strange. For a Net Navi, gender was a perceived difference. Though the ones and zeros that made up a Navi were comparable to the A, T, C, and G's that made up human DNA, there were no distinct X's or Y's that separated one kind of Navi from another. (And as far as he knew, Rockman himself was the only partial exception to this rule, his coding having from a human genome.)
Regardless of this fact, humanoid Navis often took on the appearance of one gender. With slight modifications to their program, they could give themselves muscles or curves, deep or high pitched voices, and just about any other male or female quality they desired. Even so, it was only an emulation of gender, not the real thing.
"Why would he do that? I think Cosmo is a lovely name!"
"Well, he's afraid people will mistake the baby for a girl."
"Huh? Why?"
"Because people always think he's a woman. His default weapon is a bow that shoots roses."
…and yet, there was no denying that the only word fit to describe Roll was "female".
Rockman watched as Roll clapped her hands together in front of her mouth as another wave of giggles hit the two women. When she clapped, all her of fingers hit their corresponding pair and steepled except her pinkies. They did not touch; they stayed separate and lifted, like one would do while properly holding a teacup. She'd done the same thing last week when they were experimenting with Dimensional Bubbles. When picking up the rose vase, she had lifted it delicately with four fingers, not all five.
It was strange; he'd known Roll for years, and always thought of her as female, but somehow… recently, he was noticing just how feminine she was. Most of her typical female behaviors were learned from Meiru, no doubt, but the little things she did seemed so innate. Without thinking she'd picked up the vase with four fingers. Without thinking she covered her giggles. Without really meaning to put it there, she had a sway in her walk. There was a gracefulness and delicacy in everything she did, and it came automatically to her. For some reason, these tiny details were fascinating. Roll, who had been an almost constant feature in the background during his youth, was moving more and more into the foreground of his observation.
Nanette broke his train of thought by entering the scene and blocking his view of Roll. She had one arm full of wires and sensors which were all attached to a strange machine on a rolling cart she was pulling along with the other hand. Rockman only half-listened to the explanation of what was about to happen; he figured this meant it was time to leave, so he tried to catch Roll's eye to see if she agreed.
"What should she do with Cosmo-kun?" Roll asked, oblivious to his efforts.
"Huh?"
"My baby," Hyacinth repeated to Nanette. "I can't hold him while I'm shut down."
"Oh! Um, right! I didn't think…" Nanette fumbled. "I should have brought something to put him in. Um…" She eyed the cart behind her and the bundle of wires in her arms. All of a sudden, the uncertainty on her face melted away. Her body straightened and she gave a curt nod. "I can complete this task with one hand, and therefore am able to hold the child. Please transfer him to me."
"Aah, that's…" Hyacinth, sitting on a reclined examination table, brought her knees closer to her chest, which shielded her baby from view. She was understandably reluctant to hand him to Nanette. "That's too troublesome for you. Why don't we let Roll-chan hold him?"
"Oh!" Roll flashed an excited smile at Rockman; this was what she'd been waiting for. "Is it really okay?"
"That is acceptable," Nanette conceded. "Roll-san, if you will?"
"I'll be careful, I promise!" Roll told Hyacinth. With an almost practiced ease, she scooped the proffered baby out of her new friend's arms.
Rockman gaped at her. He knew for a fact that she'd never held a baby before, and now she was doing it like she'd been doing it all her life.
"Come here, you… Shh! It's okay, look! Mama is right here!" Roll cooed. She angled her arms so the baby could see its mother. "She's right here; we're not going to leave her. She just needs to take a little nap…"
Humming reassurances, Roll took a few steps back to give Nanette room to work. She gradually turned away, too, so the baby would not see its mother go limp and rag doll when she shut down. Rockman was impressed with her judgment. Of course, he'd always known that Roll would be good with children. It was in (even though she was not programmed to have one) her nature. Rockman decided to get a closer look.
The baby was tiny, even close up. Roll had one arm under his body and her other hand under his head, but he was small enough to fit in one arm. Like a human infant, his proportions were different from those of the adult body. His head, encased in a green and white helmet, was easily the biggest part of him. His Navi icon was a close second; it was almost the same size as an adult Navi icon, and looked huge and out of place on his tiny chest. His armor wasn't complete either; he had no boots or gloves. Instead, his dark green jumpsuit ended at the wrists, revealing pale, skin-colored hands. From there the suit went down to his toes, covering his feet like the long pajamas Netto used to wear when he was small.
Netto-kun… No, this isn' t the time for that.
As strange and disproportionate as this minuscule creature was, his appearance served the same purpose as that of a newborn infant; they were intentionally vulnerable so that adults would feel compelled to take of them.
Roll had fallen deep into this trap. Completely enamored, she nuzzled their foreheads together. "Hello sweetie! I'm Roll-oneechan! Hellooo..."
The baby raised his arms and grabbed at the air. Unable to reach his goal (Roll's face, which was now contorting into silly expressions), his chubby fingers grasped at her Navi icon.
"What are you doing, silly?" Roll giggled. She shifted the baby so that she was cradling him with one arm. With her now free hand, she gently pried his inquisitive fingers away. "Do you like my antenna? I've give you one, but I don't want you pulling on it."
The baby was satisfied with just her hand. He grabbed the index finger poking at this nose and jammed it in his mouth.
"Does it taste good?" Roll laughed again, amused by his antics. "Is it yummy? Yum..."
Rockman had to chuckle at the enthusiasm with which the baby was chewing. "Does it taste like pink?" he asked, leaning over.
The baby gave him a blank stare, noticing his presence for the first time.
"Do you want to say hi to Rockman?" Roll took advantage of the baby's slack jaw to retrieve her finger. "You should learn to introduce yourself properly! Say, 'I am Cosmo. EXE, zero years old! Please take good care of me.' Can you say that? Hmm? And then we bow..." Roll bent her knees and bobbed the baby down once.
"I am Rockman. EXE," Rockman answered. He figured he was too old to give his age (and didn't know it exactly; it could be several numbers depending on how it was calculated), so he bowed instead. "It is nice to meet you!"
"Do you want to hold him?" Without waiting for an answer, Roll pushed the baby towards him. "Here! Try it, it's not hard."
"O-oh, I'm not su—" By this point the baby was practically in his arms, so there was no point in refusing. "Eh, uhm, like this?" Though Roll had made it look easy, Rockman had no idea how to hold a baby. He knew that humans were very careful with how they held their offspring, but wasn't what it was they did special, why they did it, or if any of that even applied to a baby NetNavi.
Thankfully, Roll picked up on his hesitation. "Like this," she instructed, guiding his arms as she transferred her bundle, "this arm under his body— good— and your other hand under his head. I don't know if he needs the head support like a human, but..."
Better safe than sorry.
Roll let go. Rockman held his breath... and nothing baby didn't fall or cry; the transfer was a success.
"You're right! This isn't so hard," Rockman commented, still somewhat impressed with himself.
"I told you so."
"I know, but..." Rockman regarded the small Navi in his grasp. It was heavier than he expected, the weight unevenly distributed more towards the head. Still, Rockman could not deny that there was something innate about this posture; though it was a product of human evolution, it had translated into the virtual world almost unchanged. The baby fit snugly in his arms.
"But...?" Roll prodded.
It was hard to put his objection into words. "I've held similar things," he explained, "things about this size or weight, but a baby is... alive. It moves."
"And that makes it difficult?" Roll chuckled humorlessly.
"No, it just makes me nervous! I can't predict what he's going to do next, and I do not want to be responsible for dropping him!"
"Well he's not going to run off on you; I'm not even sure he can crawl."
As though on cue, the baby's blank face scrunched up.
"Ah!" Rockman braced himself.
The baby opened his mouth wide and inhaled deeply.
"Oh! He's yawning!" Roll gasped. "See, Rockman? He's just sleepy. How adorable!"
The baby shut his mouth and blinked his watering eyes. He squirmed as though trying to get more comfortable.
Rockman tightened his hold. "O-oh no, please don't do that!"
The baby instantly responded with a whimper.
"Not so tight!" Roll admonished.
Reluctant to do so, he released his grip only marginally. "Sorry!" he apologized to both Roll and baby. The baby did not accept this apology, however, and continued to give him a displeased look. Anxious to avoid tears, Rockman bobbed the baby up and down. He'd seen parents bounce their children like this to soothe them. When Netto was little, Papa used to bounce Netto on his lap all the time.
Netto-kun... No, not now!
It didn't work. Tiny whimpers turned into longer, louder whines. The baby squirmed harder, clearly wanting to be let go. In a flash, Roll swooped in and snatched him away.
"Come here... oh shh, shh, it's okay..." Roll cast a fearful glance at Nanette. Rockman wasn't sure if she was looking for help or afraid of a reprimand.
Nanette, however, was too preoccupied with her tests to offer much help. "Don't worry 'bout it. He's just tried and grumpy from sensory overload. He's supposed to observe and learn from the world around him, but he's only been active for a few hours so all this new stuff is overwhelming." She twisted a knob on the oscilloscope-esque machine she'd brought with her. It started to produce a low buzzing sound, but a sharp smack to its side shut it up. "Please hold him a little bit longer, I just need to... oh come on, you were working yesterday..."
"All right," Roll answered. "Rockman," she said in a quieter tone, "let's give Nanette-chan some space."
With that, Roll hoisted the baby up so he was held vertically against her chest with his face nestled against her shoulder. She swayed him gently as she walked away, and it shifted the sound of his crying in a miniature Doppler Effect to Rockman, who was a few steps behind. "You poor thing," she lamented, "you've had a big day, haven't you?"
When they got a sufficient distance away (out of earshot of Nanette's angry muttering), Rockman stopped. Roll did not; she slowed down her walk into a gentle, circular pace. The baby began to quiet at the rhythmic motion, and Roll filled in the silence with soft humming. Rockman stared at her.
Once upon a time, he asked Netto why his PET was so full of pictures of Meiru. "You see her every day; why do you need pictures?"
"Because!" Netto had protested vigorously. "There are moments that I want to remember forever. The first time she wears a new dress, that time we got into a soap fight while doing dishes and she got covered in bubbles... Sometimes, no matter how mundane it might seem, I just... need a picture."
Watching Roll pace, Rockman understood this sentiment perfectly. Roll was gorgeous. She was calm and serene, but also focused and composed at the same time. Her humming, which started out as a random melody, turned into a lullaby that Mama used to sing years and years ago. She even had her eyes half-shut in that way only mothers knew how, giving the baby a sweet, loving look.
She was gorgeous; that was all there was to it, and he needed a picture. He opened a command window in front of himself and activated a screen capture program. The window shrunk and got thicker, taking on the translucent appearance of a real-life camera. As the revolution of Roll's pacing switched her from walking away to walking towards him, he snapped a few images. He paused when she was facing him directly; he wanted a front-on picture but was afraid of getting caught doing it without her permission.
N-netto-kun... puts pictures all over his desk. Why can't I have one or two?
Almost on cue, Roll glanced up. Her smile morphed into a little "oh!" of surprise which cut off her humming and stopped her in her tracks. She flushed bright pink and her smile returned, though it was directed at the floor. It was an innocent request on his part; after a moment of embarrassment she seemed to come to this same conclusion and raised her face back up with a toothy smile for the camera.
Once the picture was taken and the camera lowered, Roll inclined her head at the baby in her arms. Look at this, she mouthed without sound, fast asleep.
Sure enough, the tiny face squished against her shoulder was blissfully blank with sleep. For some reason, even though he had no part in this accomplishment, Rockman felt a sense of pride well up inside of him. Unwilling to translate this into words for fear of making noise, he conveyed his praise with a thumbs-up and a nod.
Roll nodded back. She returned to her humming and swayed on the spot. She had no reason to do it now; Rockman figured she was doing it simply because she enjoyed it. As he watched her, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that she was going to be an excellent mother someday.
His breath caught in his throat. Roll... was going to be an excellent mother. Not would be; was going to be, and he was so certain of this fact because...
Roll wanted a reason for commitment...
Roll was kind. She was caring and sweet. She always had a giggle and an adorable smile to share with the world. She was upbeat, optimistic, and normally a happy person. Even in hard times, she had an encouranging word and hug ready for anyone.
Roll wanted...
And she was very open with her emotions. When she was happy, the world knew it. When she was angry, the world knew it (and took cover). She rarely took no for an answer. It was an odd occaision when she let an argument end with her losing. As sweet and demure as she often looked and acted, when push came to shove Roll could shove. She could hold her own in a Netbattle. When she had a goal in mind, she was driven and focused in achieving it. Everything she did was done on time and done well.
...a reason...
But Rockman knew this Navi was not perfect. He could tell when she began to tire in a Netbattle. He'd seen her loose her temper and stomp and shout like a child. He'd seen her be absentminded and make mistakes like burning the rice she was cooking or accidentally ordering a 24-month subscription to Knitting Today! Online. He was getting better at telling when she was hiding things or when she was upset. He knew when she was hurt; while others saw desperation in her moves as she began to loose a fight, Rockman could only see the fire in her eyes that refused to let her give up.
He admired her for all these things and more. More so than that... he...
...for commitment: love.
Time slowed to a crawl as Rockman watched Roll sway. Her nostalgic humming washed over him and settled deep in his chest. A warm feeling ignited there and spread like wildfire. It spread to the tips of his toes; of their own volition, his feet carried him closer to her. It spread to his fingertips; they burned with the desire to touch her, but she had a halo of serenity surrounding her that they were unwilling to intrude upon.
He didn't mind; just standing next to her was enough. Standing here felt good; it felt right, and he had every intention of standing beside her as long as he was able.
Rockman was acting strange.
"That was more fun than I thought it would be! I am glad Hyacinth wasn't awake to see me holding her baby, though."
"You did alright," Roll countered. "He had a big day; he was tired. That's not your fault."
"But he got quiet almost the second you took him; he really liked you. "
"If by "like" you mean "fell asleep", then yes," Roll chuckled.
"Yeah, Nana-chan said babies sleep a lot. I wonder if newly-created mature Navis sleep more than normal. I don't remember, but I'm not a very good example. Papa would wake me up for short periods of time to test specific things, then shut me down for long periods of time until he perfected them. My memories of my creation are hazy because of that. "
Rockman had never displayed much interest in babies before. Being forced to hold a newborn, though, seemed to have awakened his curiosity. After Nanette was finished and they handed Cosmo back to Hyacinth, he'd asked Nanette about a million questions. When Hyacinth started to fall asleep, Roll decided that they had overstayed their welcome. She'd thanked both Nanette and the new mother, and excused herself and Rockman as politely as possible.
But Rockman seemed reluctant to go. Even now, it felt like he was dragging out their conversation.
"What about you, Roll-chan? Do you remember when you first woke up?"
"I suppose," she mused, her mind not really on the topic at hand. "Before I was given to Meiru-chan, I slept a lot because I had nothing to do."
Rockman was waiting for her to continue her answer. She had nothing more to say, and so she let the silence stretch out.
"So…" Rockman picked up on the awkwardness, "I guess you'll be going home now?"
"I suppose so," she nodded. "Unless there's something else you want me to do while I'm here?"
"No… not really," he said with a small shake of his head.
On the rare occasions that Roll needed to deliver a message to Netto or Rockman at work, both of them were usually too busy to talk for more than a minute. Rockman was never one to slack off, and it was a Wednesday; there no reason he shouldn't be busy in the middle of the week.
"Rockman," Roll started slowly, "thank you for taking time out of your day for me."
"Oh!" His face brightened. "It's no problem! I wanted to see the baby, too."
"Still! I know how busy you and Netto-san get. I should let you get back to him."
The brightness faded as quickly as it had appeared. "Aah. I suppose."
"Rockman… is something wrong?"
"What? No, I'm fine…"
Rockman was much more similar to Netto than he would ever admit. Both of them wore their hearts on their sleeve without realizing it. If you pointed it out to them they could do a good job of hiding it, but usually by that point it was too late to bother.
"Really?"
"Yes, everything is fine."
Roll respected Rockman's privacy, though. If he didn't want to talk about it, she wouldn't force him.
"Are you sure? Alright then, I'll get going." She gave him one last smile, and turned around to walk home.
…Two steps into her walk, something clasped around her right wrist and stopped her. Roll jumped at the sudden touch. She looked down at the blue glove on her wrist, and followed the outreached arm back up to Rockman.
"Roll-chan…" He was blushing.
"Yes?" she asked timidly.
"I want to show you something."
With that, Rockman took off in the other direction, pulling her behind him.
Roll nearly tripped. "W-what?! Rockman…"
He wasn't running, but it took Roll a few seconds to regain her footing enough to catch up. What was wrong? He didn't need to drag her like this; if he had asked her to go somewhere, she would have said yes. She was anxious to get back to Meiru, but was willing to stay a little longer if Rockman wanted her to.
"Where are we going?"
"You'll see," came the plain response.
So Roll trotted behind him, trying to ignore the funny looks they were getting from the Navis they were dodging around. It didn't take long for them to reach the edge of the main server. Rockman took a left onto a smaller path. They continued on this offshoot for a while until they came to a portal which took them to a different server.
Rockman took a less crowded path this time, and guided them around the outskirts of the server to another portal. This process happened two more times, each server being less crowded than the previous one. On the fourth and final floor, Rockman took a small, winding path that stretched on and on until Roll got so dizzy that she had to shut her eyes.
She let Rockman lead her, which proved to a bad decision when he stopped and she did not. She ran into him full force, and they both fell to the ground.
"Aie…" Roll muttered. "Aah! Rockman!"
They fell face first, and Roll had done a pretty good job of smashing Rockman's head into the floor. She scrambled to get off of him. She sat back on her legs, and helped pull Rockman in into a sitting position as well.
"I'm so sorry! Are you okay?"
Rockman rubbed his nose once. "Ooh… Yes, I'm fine. I'm the one who should be apologizing…"
Roll looked around. They seemed to be on a very small, remote server. Though there was no way of telling for sure, it also looked very old. The grid pattern on the floor was a type that she hadn't seen in a number of years.
"Where are we?" she asked.
Rockman raised one hand, and a command window popped into existence in front of him. He pushed a few buttons, and then…
"Oh… wow…"
A window opened next to them and took up one entire wall of the server. It was a live video feed that showed a sprawling view of the forest behind SciLabs.
"H-how pretty!" Roll gasped. She had never seen the forest like this before. In fact, she'd only seen this forest twice, in little glimpses she got from her PET as Meiru walked out of the building. She had no idea it was this big, or stretched so far… or was so green! Wherever this camera was, it was pretty high up; the tops of the trees all blended together to create an uneven, constantly fluctuating carpet of leaves.
"We're in a security camera on the roof. Actually, I think it's on the side of the building under the roof's overhang," Rockman explained. "It's kind of hidden to protect it from the weather, but that's also caused people to forget that it exists. I'm pretty sure it's older than I am."
Roll turned her body so she could sit facing the screen. "How on earth did you find it, then?"
Rockman copied her and turned as well. "A Navi overcome by Dark Chips hijacked a helicopter three years ago. We were afraid he was going to crash it into one of our buildings, so we assigned people to watch all the cameras that have an aerial view."
"And you found this one?"
"Mmhmm."
After a few minutes of just enjoying sitting side-by-side and watching the trees sway in the wind, Roll sighed. "This is so peaceful. Do you come here often?"
"Not recently."
"Oh? Why not?"
"I've been busy. Plus, I tend to work over lunch now so I—aah, so Netto-kun and I can get home at a decent hour."
Roll turned at the small hitch in his sentence. She couldn't help but smile at the faint blush on Rockman's face. "How long have you been doing that?"
The blush was replaced by a scrunched up look of concentration. "Oh… about a year."
"A year?" Roll said, taken aback. "That long? I don't mean to be rude, but I don't know how much it's helped Netto-san; he gets back as late as always."
"I know, I know… The two of us tend to get so absorbed in our work that we forget about the time," Rockman chuckled. "But I know I get more done this way."
"So you don't take any breaks at all?" Roll frowned. "That's not good for your health."
"I take small ones if I get tired," Rockman assured. "But I don't mind; it's worth the extra work to come home early."
"Oooh?" Roll raised an eyebrow. "And why is that?"
A flash of shock crossed Rockman's face, then a blush… and then a bashful scowl. "I like… coming home… when you're waiting for me," he ground out.
Roll smiled; it was the unintentional slipups he made that proved his feelings for her. Sometimes after he got caught, instead of ignoring it or making excuses, he would tell her the truth and say cute things like just now. It overjoyed her beyond anything she could describe.
"And I like waiting!" she declared back.
Out of the corner of her eye, she thought she caught a glimpse of a smile. Rockman acting strange or not, today was a good day.
It was also beautiful day to watch the outside world. The sky was crystal blue, marred only by a few puffy white clouds. A light breeze pushed them across their ocean, molding them as it saw fit.
"Look, look! That cloud there!" Roll pointed, excited. "Doesn't it look like an elephant?"
"An elephant?"
"Yes! With four little legs and a big trunk. See it?"
"Aah. I suppose." Rockman didn't sound very convinced.
"Eeeh?" she pouted. "What do you think it looks like, then?" Truth be told, she had never played this game before, and was nervous she might be somehow doing it wrong.
"I'm not sure."
"Come on, it's got to look like something! Haven't you ever played this game before?"
"I have," he nodded. "Netto-kun and I played it a lot growing up."
Though he had a nostalgic smile on his face, Rockman's words had come out sullen. Roll could not think of a proper response; it was becoming more and more apparent that something about Netto was bothering Rockman, but she was unsure if she should persue the topic. Had they gotten into a fight? It was rare, though not unheard of. Roll knew this infrequency was not entirely beneficial; because they got into so few fights, even small fights had to be huge for them.
She had no reason to interfere. The two of them always worked things out in the end. Even so...
"Rockman... you know... Netto-san can be a pretty capricious person. I'm sure he's forgotten whatever it is that's... well, that is, if something has... I mean..." Roll trailed off, finding it hard to complete her reassurance when she had no proof Rockman needed it. If nothing had happened between them she was just embarassing herself.
"I know he is," Rockman said softly. He tore his gaze away from the forest and focused it on his hands, now folded in his lap. "But I'm the one who is at fault here, so..."
So something was wrong. It was clear from his tone that Rockman did not want to dicuss what it was he had done. Roll bit her lip, mulling over how to best go about cheering him up without doing that.
"Can't you just go back and apologize?" she asked.
"No."
"Why not?"
"Netto-kun..." There was a long pause. "Netto-kun told me not to come back."
"Oh!" Now there was something Roll never thought Netto would say. This was more serious than she initially thought.
"Aah, but!" Rockman raised his head again and waved his hands in dissmisive manner. "Please don't make that face! I know he'll change his mind sooner or later, and... a-and it's not so bad. I got... to spend some time with you, right? So I'm okay."
Though she was happy at his comment, Roll still had to force a smile. She knew he wasn't really okay, but if being with her helped, she would stay right here. "Yes, I am glad to be here too. Does Netto-san know about this camera?"
"No."
Which is why you brought us here, Roll surmised.
"Okay then!" she cheered. She looped her arm around his like she'd done on the way to SciLabs and leaned against him. "This place is our little secret."
Rockman's brief shock was replaced by a wide smile. "Yeah."
As they returned to admiring the scenery, Roll could hardly believe her luck; who knew that someday Rockman would want to spend time alone together? Or that he would find her presence comforting? Granted it kind of stunk that it took a fight between him and Netto to-
He's lonely.
The anwer came to her in a flash of realization; he was lonely. Rockman had spent almost every waking hour with Netto as a child. In the morning he woke Netto up, made sure Netto ate breakfast, made sure Netto got out the door (almost) on time, and made sure Netto took the fatest. safest route to school. On days they were really late, Roll knew (though he never would admit to it) that Rockman plugged-in to the traffic signs to alter them to their advantage. All through the school day he was either whispering to Netto, pestering Netto to stay awake, or taking notes when Netto eventually fell asleep. When school was over, they spent the entire afternoon together at the Net Arcade or doing Net Savior work. When they went home, he spent the evening pestering Netto to do his homework and to go to sleep on time. They then said goodnight to one another and the whole cycle repeated the next day.
As Netto grew up, however, this time spent together grew shorter. They were still as close as ever; Netto just had more things to give attention to... like Meiru.
Meiru was a completely different and seperate aspect of Netto's life that Rockman had no role in. There were times Netto wanted to be alone with Meiru; things he could only tell Meiru; things that only Meiru could do for him. She didn't create a huge difference in his relationship with Rockman, but to Rockman it had to feel like she was taking away a huge chunk of their time together.
Roll tightened her trip on Rockman's arm. He was lonely; that was why he liked spending time with her. She wasn't... a replacement for Netto, was she? No, she couldn't be. She was "important". He "liked" her. She was "special". She was his support, not just something to allieviate his boredom... right?
Something flashed through Roll's peripheral vision.
"Eeh?"
"Huh?" Rockman hummed.
"I thought…" Roll trailed off, staring at the left corner of the screen.
"What?"
"Something moved. Aah! Look!"
Several small pieces of something gray fell through the camera's view.
"What the…?" Rockman said, suddenly much more alert.
Two more pieces fell.
"Did one of those look like a bolt to you?" Rockman asked, uneasy.
"I would have called it a screw," Roll answered truthfully, "but yes, it—"
Before she could finish her sentence, a two-toned, grating alarm went off.
Roll fought back a yelp of surprise. Rockman, however, cursed loudly and jumped to his feet.
"Rockman…?"
"That's the intruder alarm! Somebody's on the roof!" He looked pale. "We need to leave; I have to find Netto-kun!"
Roll scrambled to her feet. She followed Rockman out of the camera back on to the fourth floor of SciLabs, finding it much easier to navigate the winding path when not being pulled.
"C-couldn't we just plug-out into your PET?" she yelled over the alarm.
Rockman, able to run faster and steadily putting more distance between them, called back, "No! My PET is being charged in Netto-kun's office, and Netto-kun can't get to it there. He's in Meijin-san's lab, and if he's followed protocol, the door should be locked. He can't get out."
Roll questioned Netto's ability to follow protocol (his record of doing so was spotty), but said nothing.
As they came to more open ground, her attention was drawn to the dozens of Mr. Progs that were flooding into the server via the same portal she and Rockman had used earlier. Mr. Progs were useful little programs, but had almost no offense or defense. Roll reasoned that they must have fled here from a lower floor in an attempt to save themselves; therefore, the intruder must be on another floor.
Rockman began to bellow questions at them, but nobody seemed to know what was going on. The general consensus, however, was that it was happening on the first floor. Netto was (or should be) in a lab on the second floor, so he was probably safe…
…but that did not lessen Rockman's mad desire to get to Netto. He pushed his way through the developing sea of green, eventually having to resort to shouting to clear a path.
Roll followed close behind in the wake he made through the Mr. Progs. Expecting to step through the portal right after him, she was surprised (and unprepared) when Rockman stopped just short of it.
"Eek!"
In what was rapidly becoming a reoccurring theme for them, Roll bumped into him.
"Roll-chan!" Rockman whipped around, and grasped both of Roll's hands firmly in his own. "Plug-out. It's not safe here."
"W-what?"
"Go home. Tell Meiru-chan that Netto-kun and I might be late tonight."
"What?" she repeated, indignant this time. "No! I'm coming with you!"
"You can't! It's dangerous."
"So what? I can take care of myself!"
"I know you can, but—"
"No!" Roll shouted. He was being overprotective again, and she refused to be the weak, scared Princess that waited for the Hero's return home. "I can help! I'm going with you!"
"Roll-chan…"
Roll suddenly found herself enveloped in a gentle hug.
"Roll-chan," Rockman repeated, his voice very close to her right ear, "please. I know you can help, but I don't want you to. I want you to go somewhere where I know you are safe. Please."
His voice was pleading, almost desperate. Roll found it hard to raise an objection against him. All the same…
"Because," Rockman chuckled, finishing her sentence, "you, unlike the rest of the world, know that I am not perfect. You are fully aware what a small mistake could do in a dangerous situation. You know I make these mistakes, and…"
Roll wanted to go, if only to keep an eye out for Rockman. He wanted her to go home so he wouldn't have to worry about her, but she didn't want to go home and have to worry about him. His concern was touching, but there was no reason Rockman should value her well-being so much over his own.
"Rockman… At least let me come with you until you find Netto-san. When I go home, I want to be able to tell Meiru-chan that I saw him in one piece."
Rockman pulled back with a sigh that brushed her cheek. "Fine. Stay close to me."
