Chapter Nine: The Funeral of Clementine

*Three weeks later, at a cemetery in Minneapolis, the Scumbags, the Goblin, and the Flying Hawaiian 001 are all sitting in chairs, dressed in black, and looking as glum as they ever have. It is the day of Clementine's funeral, and her casket is being readied for going six feet under the ground. TFH001 goes up to a podium, and begins reading from a speech that he prepared.*

TFH001: Clementine was one of my favorite video game characters. Ever since I first played Episode One, I cared about her character, and was excited to see where she'd be taken. And, when I got the chance to work with her, I was very excited. In spite of her sarcasm and attitude, she was great fun to be around, and a good friend until the end. I'm going to miss her very much.

*TFH001 steps down from the podium, and Lee comes up.*

Lee: Clementine and I have not been on the best of terms as of late. She was like the daughter that I always wanted, but never had, thanks to my wife's bitch-ass.

Lee's Wife: FUCK YOU!

Lee: NO, FUCK YOU, YOU SKANK! Anyway, Clementine didn't deserve to go at her age, and she especially didn't deserve to go because of that black-haired, freckled, annoying, non-stop talking little SHITSTAIN! DUCK, YOU MOTHERFUCKER! I'LL KILL YOU! YOU WILL ALL DIE! YOU'LL ALL DIE!

*Carley and Goblin restrain Lee, and take him off of the podium.*

Minister: I'm afraid that those were the only people who would be speaking on Clementine's behalf, because her parents went to take a nap for an undisputed amount of time. To sum it up, Clementine was a young soul taken too early, and she will be dearly missed.

*Clementine's casket is lowered into the ground. When it sets down at the bottom of her grave, everyone, in tears, begins to leave. Only Lee and 001 stay behind to grieve.*