Shadowed Past
Chapter 9: Alex Cooper's Day Off
"So you think Fury is just trying to tell you everything is a joke because you're gaining power over him?" Steve questioned, sitting up on Alex and Piper's brand new couch.
Rather disheveled, Alex sat up in her seat adjacent to Steve's, her eyes wide with excitement, "That's exactly what I'm saying! I fought Dexter hand to hand hardly a week ago! We have my mother's office, and everything inside it. I bet all of these news articles Fury gave me aren't even real, he just had them made to sway my thought process."
Smiling at her rant, Steve replied, "Yes, I agree with you. It wouldn't surprise me at all that Fury's lying to you, it's part of his job."
"I know, it's just irritating. She's my mother, this is my business. As of now, I have no idea who my biological father is, apparently Dexter killed my mother for working with some other guy, and we have no idea who that is or why my entire life story was kept some huge secret for-"
"Als, I think you need to take a break."
"Huh?"
"You're getting so worked up about all this, and as of right now, we don't have any leads, so there's nothing else we can do."
"But, we have to-"
"The only leads we have is that it's confirmed that Dexter killed your mother, there's some other man involved, and Dexter's dead."
"Yes so we need to start researching other scientists, we have to find out who this guy was, or is, he could still be alive, I just-"
"Alex, breathe." Steve put a hand on Alex's knee. She stopped speaking and took a deep breath. "I think, as of today, we need to lay low anyways so Fury doesn't stay suspicious. You need to finish moving in, I'm sure Piper needs a break too, and-"
"Steve, I can't-"
"Yes, you can. I'm making you. You're taking a break today, Alex."
"What about Piper shouldn't she have a say in this too?"
"She's gonna be busy all day, but she agreed with me."
"What? When did you talk to her?" Alex questioned.
"This morning, she left early to go shopping for some decorations for your new place. She said she's only picking out a few and you get to decide what she keeps."
"Piper," Alex rolled her eyes. "She couldn't have at least told me where she was going?"
"I told her to go this morning when I ran into her, let you sleep in. You needed it."
"Steve-"
"Alex, today is day of rest. Now, what do you want to do? We've got all day."
After some difficulty making a final decision, Alex wanted to take a day off by staying in with Steve. She showered only to get back into her pajamas, and they decided to have a marathon of any classic movies they could agree on. Steve brought some food, and they simply unplugged for the entirety of the afternoon.
"It catches me off guard sometimes," Steve began, "Watching these old movie and seeing my time, the technology and everything, all of the stuff right around when I went under. It makes seventy years seem like nothing."
Unsure of what to say, Alex hesitated, rubbing her hand over his to comfort him. "I can't imagine, Steve. I'm sorry."
He simply shook his head, "It's okay. Just, crosses my mind sometimes."
"I know how you feel," Alex began, she might not have been able to entirely empathize with what Steve was saying but she could at the very least try. "Sometimes I remember how I used to be, how afraid I used to be of everything. So afraid that I locked myself up and would go months without using my powers. Yes, Piper and I assimilated, but, bottling everything up only tore me apart. I was so selfish, by doing all of those things to myself I took a toll on Piper. I feel horrible about, it's all my fault."
"She understands that you didn't do it on purpose, Als, I'm sure of that."
"I don't doubt that, but, I still feel guilt. I never look at my arms anymore, because, I can't. It just reminds me of those horrible things I used to wallow in. The loss, the pain, the grief, everything. It haunts me."
"And that's okay, to have bad things. We all have them."
Alex nodded. "I'm just so happy I found you. You help me see the good in things, Steve. Even when I feel like they aren't there."
"And you help me find truth in all of the lies. Thank you."
Closer than they last registered, Alex and Steve's eyes met and Steve leaned down to kiss Alex's forehead before he could rethink his action.
Movies were soon forgotten about as the two found more entertainment in each other, in their own stories and fears. Alex told Steve about her childhood, about growing up with Piper, and Steve told Alex about his.
Whether they were tears of pain or happiness, Steve wiped each one away.
He always knew the right thing to say.
He made Alex laugh like there was no tomorrow.
He cared about her more than any other man in her entire life had.
There was just something about him that was, perfect.
"Steve," Alex abruptly blurted out.
"Hm?"
Alex was unsure if she should say it. The feeling was coursing through her veins, rushing through her mind and churning in the pits of her stomach. She had to say it. It felt too right to be a bad thing. "I love you."
Steve's concerned features melted into soft, warm ones. He brought Alex's lips up to his before whispering, "I love you too," against her lips. Before she could say anything else he kissed her again, and it felt like both of their worlds had fallen into place.
After a while, Alex and Steve both needed to stretch their legs and emerge from the apartment for a while.
Downstairs in the common room, Clint, Natasha, and Tony were all sitting around talking when Alex and Steve emerged.
"Uh oh, here they come." Tony announced.
"I don't see any hickies." Clint said, sounding disappointed.
"Neither do I. Pay up." Natasha held out her palm, and Clint dug around in his pocket before handing Natasha a couple of one dollar bills.
"Did you seriously make bets about what we were doing today?" Alex asked, sinking into the soft leather couch, Steve right next to her.
The trio fell silent.
"C'mon guys, spit it out." Steve said, draping an arm around Alex's shoulders.
"We made bets on when Steve was gonna lose his virginity, and it looks like Nat won."
"Sorry to break it to you, but we didn't do anything." Alex smirked.
"No way." Clint replied, shocked.
"Yes way, no clothes were thrown today."
"Give me the five back." Clint turned to Natasha.
Rolling her eyes, Natasha handed the money back.
Trying not to seem bothered by the topic, Steve shifted uncomfortably in his seat.
"I'm not even going to dare ask what bets you two placed," Alex pointed to Tony and Clint. "Let's leave it a mystery and see if either of you actually win."
"Alex," Steve nudged her.
"What? If they're gonna leave their minds in the gutter we might as well let them roll around in their dirt."
Natasha smirked a this, leaning back and crossing her legs. "Oh is this a sight I'd never thought I'd see."
Tony shrugged, "I mean, your girlfriend's not wrong, capsicle."
Clint agreed with Tony.
Just as the conversation started to change subject, the elevator opened to reveal Piper, with more bags than she could carry.
Everyone called out their greeting to her except for Steve, who stood. "Do you need some help?"
"No, I think I'll be okay, I just-"
Piper tried to move but almost dropped all of her bags, so Steve proceeded to rush over and help her.
"How was shopping?" Alex called, watching as Steve helped Piper sort out the many heavy bags onto the bar.
"Great! I got lots of stuff for the walls, some table decorations, a lamp, our place will be looking fresh in no time."
"I'm excited to see what you guys do with your space. I tried to make it comfortable." Tony spoke up.
"It's great, Tony. We can't thank you enough."
"I know, sunshine. It was my pleasure."
"Als!" Piper called, "Would you mind helping me carry some of this up to our room?"
"Yeah sure thing," Alex replied, rising from the couch.
"Dinner's at six tonight, Thelma and Louise. I'd hope you'll be joining?" Tony called after them.
"We're having a family dinner?" Piper responded excitedly.
"We'll be there." Alex huffed, Steve following close behind her with a few extra bags.
Dinner later that evening seemed more like an odd family reunion more than anything else. The tower was so big, there had already been multiple days on which Alex saw no one except for Steve and Piper. Seeing everyone lounging around in one room was a sight that was beyond rare, and caught Alex off guard as her and Piper arrived at dinner.
Steve immediately noticed when Alex entered and politely dropped his conversation with Thor to go greet her. Bruce walked over to Thor when he saw he was sitting alone at the bar.
"What's up, big guy?"
"Captain Rogers just left me for Lady Alex. I feel betrayed." Thor said, taking a gulp of his beer.
Bruce smiled, "Hey, cut him some slack. People do crazy things when they're in love." He took a seat on the stool next to Thor.
"Love? I did not realize they were a couple."
"They aren't a couple." Bruce replied looking over his shoulder to see Alex smiling brightly as Steve greeted her, a smile present on his face as well.
Thor had joined Bruce in making his observance, "They are definitely something, if I have a say in this."
"Yeah, they're something alright."
On the other side of the room, Piper went straight for the food after she said hi to Steve, but Alex and Steve were so caught up in each other they hardly noticed.
"Did you come for the food too?" Clint asked, startling Piper from her actions.
Piper hesitated before answering, "Maybe. Did you?"
Clint shrugged. "I guess so. I mean, I like talking to people and everything but it's a lot of work."
"Yeah, you got me there."
He looked up and noticed that Steve and Alex had gone to sit on the couch and didn't seem to be looking anywhere else but at each other. "Hey, don't let it get to you."
"Let what get to me?"
"Them. Being all over each other. I've been jealous before too."
"I'm not jealous," Piper rolled her eyes.
"What are you then?"
"Frustrated maybe? I don't know. I'm so happy for her but sometimes it's hard because she spends so much time with him. I just miss her."
"Did you try talking to her about it?"
"No, I didn't. Because I know she'll feel guilty, she'll act like she doesn't but she will, and then I'll feel guilty too."
Clint looked at Piper questioningly for a second, "Is that how females think? Why are you all so complicated?"
"It's not complicated, Clint. It's common sense."
"Sounds complicated to me."
"Because guys always have their heads where the sun doesn't shine and think with their downstairs brain." Piper replied, taking a bite of her food.
Clint shrugged, "You're not wrong."
"Exactly."
Meanwhile, Alex and Steve were lost in their own fishbowl as they smiled and laughed and fell even deeper in love than they already were.
"Your eyes look beautiful in this light. They look beautiful in every light, but, especially this one." Steve smiled.
Alex looked down, blushing, "Thanks, Stevie."
"I'll never get over your violet eyes."
"And I'll never get over you."
They both shared a soft laugh before Steve brushed a strand of hair out of Alex's face, "Not to ruin the moment, but, I gotta ask you something."
Alex swallowed a lump in her throat, "Go ahead."
"You seem like it, but, I need to ask, are you happy?"
"What do you mean, Steve? Of course I'm happy. I've never been happier." Alex began to panic: What if he was breaking up with her? What if he didn't feel the same way? He just complimented her, didn't he? But what if he didn't mean it? What if he was just being nice? What if-
"That's good, I'm glad. I just wanted to make sure."
"Steve, is everything okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, babe, I just worry about you, that's all. I want you to be happy. And if you ever feel like you aren't, please tell me."
Alex smiled at Steve's use of a modern name for his girlfriend, "Like I said, of course I'm happy. And I promise, I'll tell you if I'm not." Steve grinned at her words. "Can I ask what started this?"
"What do you mean?"
"It was kind of abrupt don't you think? What made you start thinking that I wasn't happy?"
"I don't know, you've just had a lot on your mind lately, and I just needed to hear you say that you're okay. I know you're an expert at hiding how you really feel."
"And?"
"And?" Steve was confused.
"I know there's more, Steve. It's okay, you can tell me."
Steve shifted, slightly uncomfortable, "I just, I feel like I'm not enough for you sometimes. And, you deserve the best, Alex. I need to make sure that I'm the best for you."
"Steve, I can't imagine myself with anyone but you." Alex breathed, "Please never feel that way. You're so much for me, more than enough, more than you can ever imagine."
"Thanks, babe."
"You're welcome, babe."
Steve smiled at Alex's mockery, and she smiled back. "I guess I have to kiss you now, I can't help myself."
"Oh no, what a shame." Alex teased, her lips meeting with Steve's as they shared a passionate kiss.
After everything wound down from dinner, Piper still had enough energy left to start unpacking some of the new things she bought and scattering them around the apartment.
"Piper, are you sure you want to get into all this tonight?" Alex asked, maneuvering her way around the boxes to get a drink from the kitchenette.
"I'm already pretty knee deep in it aren't I?"
"I guess, I was just wondering," Alex trailed off. She fiddled with her glass, looking down at the contents of it before speaking again, "Is everything okay? You just seem upset."
Piper sighed, keeping her eyes on the lamp she was assembling, "Als, I'm fine, I promise."
"You don't sound fine, though. I just wanted to see what was going on with you."
"What do you mean?"
"You just seemed funny at dinner, and, quiet, and, I don't know, lately you've just seemed like something's bothering you but I can't make out what it is."
"I'm sorry I've been a little irritated," Piper was sincere, "But I promise it's just me, I've just been tired lately and us moving here? I love it, it's just a lot, y'know."
"Yeah, of course. Me too." Alex looked down again, pausing. "Do you need some help?"
Piper smiled, "When can I not use your help?"
Alex began to help Piper unbox more decorations, assemble them, and place them around the apartment on the walls and tables. They played their music as loudly as they wanted, because they didn't have to worry about noise complaints anymore.
Later that night, both tucked away in their own beds, Piper slept soundly in her room while Alex tossed and turned in her sleep.
Alex's skin was on fire, but the room was filled with the weight of cold air.
Alexis.
Her hands clutched the sheets.
Alexis, listen to me.
Her eyes stayed tightly shut.
It's okay to let go.
Her jaw clenched.
You've done your job.
You know what power you hold.
You are strong.
You're happy.
Let go, and you will be at peace.
Her eyes opened.
And the weight on her shoulders seemed to disappear.
I love you.
