All familiar characters are JEs, not mine. I make no money. Just doing this for fun and cause I'm bored at work! Also first story so reviews and constructive criticism welcome! ENJOY!

9

I woke up at 9 feeling pretty good. I knew Jess would be here in an hour to head to Philly so I grabbed some breakfast and took my phone out to do a little research.

I managed to keep everything I ate down and by the time Jess was in the parking lot at 10 I was ready to roll. Shopping would be more fun now that I had a few dollars in the bank and didn't have to worry about maxing out a credit card. I couldn't spend much, but it was better than being totally broke.

"I thought we could make productive use of our drive time and you could finally tell me who the baby daddy is on the way!"

I know I hadn't told her. That wasn't a mistake on my part.

"Its eating you alive isn't it?" I asked her

"You'll have to tell me eventually." She faked being upset.

"This appointment today won't have any paper trail right? Just an in office visit?" I asked changing the subject.

"Were not even on the appointment calendar." Now she was sounding smug.

"Thank you. I can't tell you how much you've helped me the last few days."

I really was grateful for Jess.

My cell started ringing and when I looked at the caller ID my blood pressure went up.

"It's my mom." I explained.

"You gonna answer it?" Jess asked as I just let the ringtone play itself out.

When it finally stopped, I went to put the cell back in my bag, but it started ringing again. I finally gave up and answered it.

"Hi Mom. What's going on?" Trying to sound normal but I knew why she was calling. She had no doubt heard about me and Joe calling it quits and him leaving town.

"Stephanie, I'm very sorry to hear about you and Joseph. Are you doing ok?" She sounded genuinely concerned, and I was thrown for a loop. Gone was the harsh tones and nagging about "losing the last chance I had left" or "how could you do this to poor Joseph?"

"I'm doing ok. Are you feeling alright?" I asked her. This is out of character for her so now I was trying to make sure she wasn't drunk or stroking out.

"Joseph called me very early yesterday morning and explained everything. Stephanie I'm very sorry for the way I've acted in regards to your relationships. Joseph told me I push you too hard to be something you don't want to be, and that when he did the same thing, you just pulled further away, and Stephanie I don't want you to pull further away. I barely see you or talk as it is. I'm sorry."

What the Hell is going on around here lately?!

"Um. Thank you, Mom. I appreciate that. Me and Joe just decided we wanted different things, and were better off friends." Explaining it like that made it seem so insignificant.

"I'm making a roast chicken and German chocolate cake for dinner tonight. I promise not to invite any men over if you come for dinner." She was making a joke. She never made jokes.

"Um yeah. That sounds great . I'll see you at 6." I was very, very confused.

"It's Saturday and I'm sure you have things to do today, let's make it 7:30 so you don't have to rush over."

"Is the Burg going to explode over dinner not being served at 6?" I said jokingly.

"O all those busy bodies can stuff it. Our home phone number is being changed Monday morning. I just can't take any more calls about your Grandmother." She sounded exasperated. I can only imagine the sheer amount of calls she gets weekly about Grandma. Probably enough to make me throw the whole damn phone out the window.

"Ok, so I'll see you by 7:30 then." I was having a hard time accepting my mother's new outlook on my life.

I hung up the phone and just stared at it for a minute in quiet contemplation. I sent Joe a quick text

I don't know what you said to my Mom, but whatever it was THANK YOU. Be safe.

"I have to be back by 7:00 tonight for dinner with my parents." I told Jess

"Not a problem." Jess said.

We talked for a while and made it to the doctor's office in Philly by 11:15. As we walked in, there was no one in the office and a cute brunette nurse came out and greeted Jess like they were old friends. She introduced me and we headed into the back of the office to a room like any other gyno office with the bed and evil stirrups and equipment.

An older woman with peppered gray hair and soft gray eyes came in and greeted us.

"You must be my patient A today. My name is Dr. McLaughlin. I haven't been told your name sweetheart, and you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. Ashley here tells me you are in need of a first prenatal appointment, but have concerns about it "being on the books" she said as she winked at me.

Jess and Ashley then excused themselves from the room.

"I really appreciate you seeing me today under these circumstances." I said shyly. I wasn't sure how this would go.

"Ashley tells me her and Jess have been friends for years, and I do pro bono work quite frequently. If you are in trouble or feel threatened at home, please feel free to tell us. We can help you without judgment."

"NO! No, it's nothing like that." I instantly felt guilty and a little embarrassed these people though I might be here for other reasons than why I was.

"No judgment. I'm going to ask you a few standard questions since this is your first time here. I have you listed as Patient A. in our system so nothing will be recorded but answers and that's only to calculate your due date. Do you remember when your last menstrual cycle was?" Dr. McLaughlin was easy to talk to and seemed genuine.

"I'm on the 3 month pill, so I don't really remember the date of my last period. I know I should probably keep track of that, but my life isn't exactly normal."

"I understand. Those 3 month pills can be great, but by the time your period is missed you're already feeling other symptoms."

"I know the date of conception if that helps." I said.

"Well actually yes. That's something most women don't know." She laughed and changed to another screen in her computer.

"March 3rd." I had already looked at the calendar on my phone and calculated it out.

"There's no other possible day?" The doctor asked a little skeptical.

"Nope. That was the day."

I highly doubted I would forget that day for as long as I lived. And when your sexual encounters with anyone other than a shower massager happen as infrequently as mine do lately, it's pretty easy to pin point down the day.

"That makes your due date on or around November 24th and that puts you at about 7 and a half weeks pregnant. How did you confirm this pregnancy? Home test or just symptoms?"

"Home tests." Short, simple answers were all I was really capable of right now. She had just told me by Thanksgiving of this year I would have a tiny human I was responsible for, not just showing up to dinner on time.

"Multiple?" I nodded yes.

"How many were positive?" The doctor asked

"15." I replied. She looked up eyes wide.

"Out of how many?" She asked

"15." I bit my bottom lip and shrugged my shoulders.

"Well I would say that's a confirmation." She continued to ask questions about my general health and family history of pregnancy related illnesses. Other than the fact that I had been born a month early, and Val's train wreck of a pregnancy, I didn't really know anything. I usually tuned out all of that information, never thinking I would actually have to know it.

"Normally we would wait a little while longer to do the first ultrasound, but with your advanced age and morning sickness, I'd like to do one today. Is that sound ok?"

I nodded yes and was getting ready to lay back and pull up my shirt when she stopped me.

"The first ultrasound is done internally. The standard wand won't be able to pick up much this early in the pregnancy. I'll leave the room to let you get undressed from the waist down. When you're done, go ahead and hop back up here, and you can use this sheet to drape over you. I'll be back."

Internally? I swallowed hard. What did that mean?

I followed doctor's orders, got undressed and back on the table in a few minutes time. It was all very similar to an annual exam. The doctor knocked lightly on the door and came back in.

"You ready?" She asked me.

I couldn't really answer so I just nodded my head again. She helped me get my feet up in the stirrups and into position. She pulled out what looked like a foot long probe and covered it in a plastic cover and gel.

No fucking way is that thing going where I think it's going.

"Alright. This is going to be just a little cold and a little bit of pressure." And up went the wand.

I was staring at the monitor next to me to try and distract myself from everything going on from the waist down. As the doctor moved the wand around, the screen was a black and white blur.

After a few seconds she stopped moving around so much and pointed to the screen.

"There they are." The little white blob on the screen looked more like a baby than I thought possible. You could almost see the tiny little nubs that are arms and legs and a head that was as big as the rest of its body. It was strange looking, sure, but it was definitely human.

The doctor moved the wand around and started looking and measuring everything on the screen. Snapping a few pictures as she went.

"Everything looks as it should. Plenty of fluid. It's hard to diagnose any possible problems right now since it's still so early. But the next ultrasound around 20 weeks will tell us a lot more information." She said wiping the machine down and handing me 4 mini photos printed on a single long piece of paper.

The doctor left for me to get dressed.

I just stared at the pictures in my hand. It was real. It was one tiny little thing growing inside me and I couldn't stop staring at it. It was beautiful. I wondered if he would have my eyes, or his fathers. God help him if he got stuck with my hair. I was still completely convinced it was a boy.

I put the pictures in my back pocket and walked into the nurse's station area.

Jess and Ashley were looking at pictures on Ashley's phone and both looked up at me as I walked out.

"All good?" Jess asked.

I just nodded again. Not really sure what to say. The doctor walked back over to me and handed me a plain medium sized paper bag.

"This is 9 months' worth of prenatal vitamins with DHA. There's also books and pamphlets on a lot of different issues. Cord blood storage, Adoption, breastfeeding, termination, diet during pregnancy, what to expect when you're expecting, anything and everything. There's also a list of phone apps I would recommend you look into if that's something you think you would find helpful. I fully believe in being well informed. If for some reason you need anything feel free to call the office and ask for me directly.

"Thank you for everything. And for seeing me on such secretive circumstances."

"I understand more than you know the situation you're currently in. Secrets are safe with me as long as you stay health and take care of that baby." She said pointing towards my lower stomach. She gave me a sweet smile and walked into the back of the office.

"Ashley is gonna come with us, if that's cool." Jess told me.

We left the doctor's office and went to get lunch. Getting to know Ashley was nice and her and Jess enjoyed chatting and catching up as I was lost in my own little world.

I had seen him. He was real. I couldn't retreat to denial land anymore knowing I had proof he actually existed.

Jess broke me out of my mental ramblings and we went shopping. They convinced me to buy a few maternity jeans now, even though I was not anywhere near needing them. Ashley assured me it was better to have them when I needed them than try and squeeze into jeans that no longer fit.

We found maternity jeans that didn't have that full belly panel in the front, but stretchy small panels on the sized that grew with me. I instantly fell in love with these pants. I could eat a few too many donuts in the morning and not feel like my pants were too tight for the rest of the day. I also bought a few shirts that were looser fitting but not quite maternity shirts to hide myself when I started getting a little bigger.

We dropped Ashley back off at the doctor's office around 5 o'clock and started heading back towards Trenton.

"You ready to call Diesel back?" She asked me about half way home.

"No. I know I need to, but I'm just not mentally prepared to deal with him right now."

"I need to get through a few other things first. I know picking up and leaving overnight isn't going to happen, so I need to get a few ducks in order before I bolt."

"What if Ranger comes back first?" Jess asked

"Then I'm screwed." I laughed. Jess looked over at me with an eyebrow raised in question.

"I'm not sure I could leave with him being home. It would definitely make things more complicated. I know I need to leave before June 1st. There's no way I'm going to be able to hide him (as I point to my belly) if he decides to start showing, especially if Ranger comes back. The other guys I can probably play it off like I just need to ease up on the donuts. Ranger doesn't like space between us. He'll know instantly. I'm not sticking around for his pity. I refuse to be another Rachel." I said knowing I pretty much just admitted the baby was Ranger's.

"I KNEW IT!" Jess all but jumped out of the driver's seat.

"I mean, I was like 95% sure, but that cop, especially after showing up the other day at your apartment, gave me just a little doubt." Jess was way too happy.

"If it was Joe's I wouldn't be trying to disappear off the face of the earth. We would have gotten married and lived unhappily ever after." I took a deep breath, thankful that wasn't the case.

My "situation" wasn't great, but at least I wouldn't be stuck in a loveless marriage with a guy I would grow to resent for the rest of my life. At least I had that going for me.

"You're Catholic, right?" Jess asked me.

"Well. Yes. And No. I was raised Catholic. I haven't been to a mass in I can't tell you how long. But I still have that good old fashioned "Catholic guilt" thing going for me."

"So other alternatives aren't an option?"

"Nope. I don't think I could even consider adoption." The idea of giving up my baby made with the man I loved more than anything just wasn't feasible. I would do anything to make sure they were safe, including what I'm about to do, but I could never give them to a stranger to raise.

"So we just gotta make sure you're ready to go by Memorial Day then." Jess said

"And hope Ranger and Bobby don't come back before then."

Jess dropped me off at the front door to my apartment building with my shopping bags and I thanked her again for everything today. I went upstairs to get ready for dinner with my parents.

This could go either really well, or really badly.