Pairing: R/T eventually (I'm working on it); Rory/Paris are on friendish terms; established relationship for Luke/Lorelai

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone except CMM heehe (I wish, but he does visit me in my dreams) Hmmm…that sounds nice I think I'll go back to sleep and be in my CMM heaven ::sigh::

A/N: Hello people! Here is the next chapter. Thanks to GG.net for some portions of transcript. Thank you so very much for all the reviews; I have over a hundred! Whoo-hoo *doing a little happy dance* Thanks to Ally as always for beta-ing this for me. Enjoy!

Priya

Oh yeah for all of you who don't know Xenophobia- is the fear or hatred of foreigners.

Chap 9

(Luke's Diner)

"Please Luke. Please, please, please, please, please?" begged Lorelai.

"How many cups have you had today?"

"Zero."

"Plus?"

"Zero plus zero equals zero. Therefore I've had zero cups of coffee today. I'm really good at math you can ask all of my teachers if you want. Well atleast the ones that aren't dead. If you want I can call-"

"Lorelai," warned Luke.

"Okay, Okay I had four cups this morning, but your coffee is much better."

"Please Luke? Please? I'll give you my first born or better yet I'll give you this,"said Lorelai going behind the counter and giving Luke a huge kiss.

"Fine,"responded Luke gruffly but still a bit dazed from the kiss.

"Thanks. I knew that it would work. I've still got it,"she said clicking her tongue.

"Junkie,"scolded Luke.

"Angel. You've got wings baby. Infact you've earned them for being such a good supplier."

"Hey Babe,"Lorelai greeted Rory who had just walked in looking miserable. "Felling better?"

"A little,"responded Rory licking her dry lips. I need lipgloss."

"Ok, I have… vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, honey, and toasted marshmallow.

"Anything in there that doesn't resemble a breakfast cereal?" asked Rory.

"Yes," responded Lorelai pulling out another make-up bag."It has no smell but it changes colors with your mood. "

"God, Bozo the clown doesn't need this much make-up."

"Gosh, you're crabby. Still not feeling that well?"

"No, I've told you I'm fine. It's just that I lost my Incubus CD."

"Oh…I took that."

"Thief,"accused Rory.

"Ha! I did not steal it. What I did my dear, is called borrowing. It's in my bag, you can get it. And I'll get you, missy, some coffee.

"Thanks,"mumbled Rory sitting down.

Lorelai went behind the counter to pour some coffee for Rory, and turned around to find Luke giving her a mean look with his arms crossed over his chest. " What? It's not for me. It's for Rory, I swear,"defended Lorelai.

"You're shameless."

"Look, Officer Luke. She's right at that table, right there."

When Lorelai returned she found a guy talking to Rory. She knew that the guy was hitting on her, and she wanted to make Rory feel better so she started to play one of their games."Hello Darlene, and who might this young hunkster be?" asked Lorelai in a deep hick accent.

"Oh, I don't know yet Mimi. I was just about to ask,"responded Rory stifling giggles, but imitating Lorelai's accent.

"Oh, my name's Jack. I was just talking to-"

"My daughter,"Lorelai filled in for him dropping the accent.

"Are you my new daddy?" asked Rory in a baby voice.

"Wow. You do not look old enough to have a daughter. No, I mean it. And you…well you do not look like a daughter."

"That's very flattering of you Jack,"cooed Lorelai. "Isn't that flattering Darlene?"

"Very flattering indeed Mimi."

"Nice to know that I can still flatter two beautiful women. So…daughter, I mean Darlene did you know that I by chance was traveling with a friend?"

"She sixteen,"Lorelai responded for Rory.

"Oh... ok, you know I've got to go… I have to uhh…I have to finish reading the dictionary."

"Oh you're leaving so soon? It would be fun if you could hang out with us for a while. What section are you in the dictionary? Darlene and I are in the X's. Infact, we're at the word xenophobia. And lemme tell you something Jack, this whole town is extremely xenophobic. And we do scary things to strangers, especially to those who try to hit on Darlene here,"said Lorelai.

"Oh…"gulped Jack.

"Oh nothing, Mimi has this thing of screwing with people's minds. Don't worry the last guy who came to Stars Hallow was treated really nicely, even though he did hit on me. All we did to him was shave him bald and tattoo intruder on his forehead."

Right on cue Lorelai took out a razor from her make-up bag. "I think I'm gonna go now,"said Jack nervously and ran out the door.

"Ok, drive safe. I hope you enjoy Stars Hallow. Come back soon!"Lorelai called after him. I think that's our best scare ever. Well, I don't think he's ever coming back again. What about you Darlene?" Then both started bursting in laughter.

Just then Lane walked approached their table she had been standing by the door for a while now watching the scenario. "And the Oscar goes to Lorelai Gilmore and Lorelai Gilmore for an excellent duet performance. Ladies take a bow and come except your reward,"announced Lane handing them both coffee.

"Thanks Lane, you're the best,"responded Rory taking a gulp of coffee.

"Nice to know that you think that. Rory how much do you love me?"asked Lane.

"That depends."

"Be careful Rory it looks like Lane has something up her sleeve,"cautioned Lorelai.

"I do not," protested Lane. I was just wondering if you could get these records for me. Then I'll be one step closer to completing the 70's. Please Ror?"

"Sure, I'll see what I can do."

"Well I better get going. I sneaked out of the house. My mother is still outraged because of the Henry thing, but she'll eventually give in. I mean he's a potential Korean doctor."

"Lane?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you told her that?"

"No! Oh my god! How stupid could I possibly be?"

"Be careful Lane she might have spies watching you,"warned Lorelai. Don't speak the Lord's name in vain or you might have to go to Korean Bible camp again."

"You're right. Well I better get going and tell her,"squealed Lane with delight.

"Bye Lane."

"Bye Rory. Lorelai."

"Well I better get going as well,"said Rory glumly.

"Hey Babe, if your plan doesn't work then push him against his locker and kiss him till he can't breathe."

"Mom."

"What? It was just a suggestion."

"Yes, but that's not what I want to do. I'm just confused. He messes with my mind. He's an engima. Besides I don't even have a plan. And let me suggest that we actually reach on time at Grandma's today."

"Darn, you just had to ruin my parade didn't you?"

"Bye Mom.

"Bye Sweets."

*********

(Gilmore Mansion)

"Mom…just ring it!"yelled Rory annoyed.

"Fine, you don't have to be so mean about it."

"We have been standing out here for the past five minutes in the cold because you think that there is a monkey in the house, and refuse to go in!"

Suddenly the door flew open,"Hello Rory. Hello Lorelai,"greeted Emily.

"Hello monkey,"said Lorelai and Emily cast a question look towards Rory.

"Don't even ask,"replied Rory.

*****

"Mom, please?"

"No Lorelai. We're waiting for your father. I have never started dinner without him before, unless he was ill or out of town. And I'm not going to start now,"stated Emily.

"Sorry everyone for being late,"Richard came in taking a seat. "I was on the phone."

"Oh no problem Dad, I just love it when my food teases me saying 'haahaa you can't eat me'."

"You were on the phone…"prompted Emily.

"Yes, long distance,"continued Richard.

"God?"asked Lorelai.

"London,"clarified Richard.

"God lives in London?" questioned Lorelai a smile spreading across her face.

"My mother lives in London,"corrected Richard.

"Your mother is God?"questioned Lorelai.

"Lorelai,"warned Richard.

"So God is a woman…"continued Lorelai.

"Lorelai,"Richard warned again.

"And as a relative, that's so cool. I'm so totally gonna ask for favors."

"Make her stop," pleaded Emily towards Rory.

"I don't think I can. It's kind of hard to when she gets started,"said Rory.

"What did your mother have to say?"asked Emily poking at her peas.

"Oh nothing much…just that she will be paying us a visit."

"Again?"asked Emily her face paling.

"Yes, Monday."

"This Monday?"

"Yes, this Monday."

"Oh my goodness,"Emily's face was now ghastly white and she began wavering.

"Uhhh…Mom is that some kind of new dance that you do or are you about to faint?"asked Lorelai heading towards Emily.

Lorelai's question was answered with the loud thud of Emily's body hitting the ground. "Ok, I'll go with the latter,"she answered herself.

*********

(Independence Inn)

"She passed out?"asked Sookie shocked.

"Yeah, we had to do the whole smell the salts and shoes deal."

"Just because your grandmother is coming over? Tell me Lorelai how is your grandmother like?"

"Hmmm…she's one of those 'I'm out of estrogen and I have a gun' women,"anwered Lorelai refilling her cup with coffee.

"Oooh…scary combo."

"You know what's even scarier? She has tea time and an English accent,"said Lorelai in mock terror. Then her cell began ringing. "Talk to me."

"Damn it! Is there a God out there?"

"Hello Mom. Yes, don't you remember from our previous conversation? Grandmother is god. Are you okay?"

"No Loreali I'm not. I'm extremely stressed or I would not be calling you up and screaming like a lunatic."

"Well Mom…you usually do."

"Lorelai,"warned Emily.

"What? I'm just saying it like it is."

"Well the reason I called is because I was wondering if you and Rory would like to join us at the country club? I need to get out and get some air."

"Gee…Mom…as thrilling as that sounds I can't."

"There be those tarts that you like there."

"Great you've got yourself a bargain."

"Fine meet us at the house at eleven sharp,"there was a muffled sound then came the piecing voice of Emily,"Damn it, put the candles six inches apart! Can you not measure? Then she returned to the phone,"Sorry Lorelai."

"Grandma is dangerous for your health."

"And you've just figured this out?"

"Hey I'm slow, so what? Don't blame me. After all I do get it from you."

Emily missed that comment or else Lorelai would have gotten and earfull,"No the hat rack is two inches that way,"yelled Emily.

"Okay Mom I'll see you at eleven,"Lorelai clicked her cell.

Sorry for the no Trory interaction, but like I said I needed to take a break. To clarify some questions, I'm still going to be writing Trory fics and only that. I am a true Trory and refuse to change my ways. This girl will always remain a Trory; Trory forever! Anywhoo, in the next chapter more fun things will come your way including a certain blonde. (don't worry Trory fans I'm gonna get into my Trory groove soon) Reviews are always great, so if you have the time drop me a line.

Priya

P.S. Yes, I was going through the dictionary when I found that word. I know I know I a very strange. heehee