Its been a long time I have not updated here it is I had to take a brake and get my ideas straight

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Kagome's body shivered and she balled herself up on the bed hiding her face in her hands, back in her hut. She felt much safer here, she felt safe anyplace Sesshomaru wasn't. She wouldn't allow herself to fall asleep, her restless mind just wouldn't allow it. Her mind kept repeating the day's earlier events, as she subconsciously ran a hand over her pearl bracelet.

She moved to her back and stared at the huts ceiling her mind whirling. She closed her eyes softly and made a soft frustrated squeal She wanted desperately to go home and never see Sesshomaru again, but he still hadn't let her go. She couldn't understand it. He was aware he had the wrong girl yet still wouldn't let her go. He had expressed how sorry he was, but all Kagome wanted was for him to let her go.

Kagome covered her hands with her face feeling hopeless she moaned into them.

()

Sesshomaru watched his ceiling his mind on a certain dark haired girl he had hurt so bad no chance of reconciliation. He was aware of that, but he couldn't help but try. Raising from his bed he exited his room into the kitchen getting a glass of water. He went to take a drink of water when a thought occurred to him.

He had destroyed her, did the most horrible things imaginable to her, but he couldn't let her go not into she understood how horrible he felt. That's why he was yet to let her go, afraid if she did leave he would never be able to correct his wrongs.

He had to figure out a way to make this up to her, he just had to.

()

Surfacing the water and taking a deep breath of air Sesshomaru swam back to shore. Swimming in the ocean had always calmed him, but it didn't help this time. It had helped him come to a decision he felt was for the the best.

It was early and he hadn't gotten any sleep at all the night before. His thoughts had stayed on Kagome. Who had slept in the hut he was aware and even though he hated it he couldn't blame her. She wouldn't come to him, so he would have to go to her.

Sesshomaru made the journey back to his house changing out of his wet shorts and putting on dry clothing. He slowly made his way to the hut dreading but needing what it would bring at the same time. He had decided, that he would let her go.

The hut was empty when he came to it, but didn't panic like he usually would. Instead he made his way towards Kagome's garden.

He found her bent over watering the plants he had forced her to grow. He coughed slightly to get her attention. She turned around so quickly she dropped the the water container. The wide frightened look on her face did nothing to settle Sesshomaru's guilt.

"I came to talk." He said.

Kagome frowned, but didn't object she had been around him long enough to be aware when he wanted to talk he would. So she just nodded her eyes on her toes, not wanting to look at him.

"Do you still want to go home?" He asked quietly already aware of the answer.

When he received no answer he looked up at her finding her watching him eyes wide.

"What are you trying to say?" She finally asked so softly he barely heard her.

Sesshomaru blinked looking away from her. "I'm saying if you wish to go home I will take you."

Kagome blinked and swallowed hard, "Are you serious?" she asked.

Sesshomaru nodded, his eyes looking any place but Kagome.

At the sob he looked up finding Kagome had collapsed sobbing loudly. Sesshomaru went to move towards her, but caught himself quickly and stood still like a statue, then turned leaving the clearing. He had to let her go.

()

Kagome smiled brightly, but a nervous twinge had settled in her stomach. She took one last look around the hut, surprised by the thought of missing it. She closed the door.

Making her way to the pier Kagome stopped at Jaken who was giving her a sad smile. Kagome was already smiling. "Bye Jaken." She said. She moved towards the boat and the silver haired man who stood beside the boat, his sun glasses covering his eyes arms crossed. Her pace slowed another feeling filled her gut.

Sesshomaru watched her near, then got onto the boat waiting for her. Once she was on board he started the boat and speed towards the mainland.

Kagome stared at the back of Sesshomaru's head feeling like she should say something.

"You want pursue Kikyo after this will you?" Kagome couldn't help but ask.

Along pause later Sesshomaru finally answered, "If I did everything you went threw would have been for nothing." He said barely over the roar of the engine. "So I will leave her alone."

"Thank you." Kagome whispered, but Sesshomaru heard her.

"Right here." Sesshomaru said pointing to a silver car.

Kagome frowned, "I think I should take a taxi."

" Just get in the car Kagome." Sesshomaru said getting into the drivers seat cranking the car.

Kagome taking a deep breath slid into the passenger seat.

"Seat belt," Sesshomaru said.

"What?" Kagome asked not sure she had heard him right.

Sesshomaru sighed reaching over her clasping her seat belt.

Kagome had frozen at his closeness and had remained frozen long after he pulled from the parking lot onto the road.

Hours later Sesshomaru pulled into a familiar street to Kagome that brought tears to her eyes.

"You can let me out right here." Kagome said nervous thinking if someone had seen her exit his car after the long period she had been gone that they would think the wrong thing.

Sesshomaru read her mind pulling onto the side of the street, when Kagome reached for the door he quickly sized her arm.

When Kagome looked back she found Sesshomaru wasn't looking at her. She gently removed his hand from her. "Please Sesshomaru just let me go." She said softly. "Let's just pretend like none of this ever happened. You go your way and I go mine" With that she closed the door.

()

Kagome rang the door bell when no one answered she pulled the hidden key from under the mat opening the door of her home. Once inside she collapsed beside the door sobbing loudly so happy to be home.

It was many minutes later when she finally calmed herself enough to wonder why wasn't anyone home. Sighing she stood whipping the tears from her face, she went up the stairs to her room taking a shower and changing out of the clothes that reminded her of her time on Sesshomaru's island.

Sitting on the bed she began to dry her hair when her room door opened and she screamed.

"Your back." Kikyo said.

Kagome calmed herself jumping from the bed she hugged her cousin softly without noticing it beginning to cry.

"Hey, hey!" Kikyo shouted pulling Kagome away from her. "What's wrong with you? And how could you just going missing for 3 months like that?" Kikyo asked.

Kagome shook her head trying to find something to say. How could she say she was kidnapped by some guy who thought she was her, that wanted revenge for Inuyasha's death?

"Oh well no matter you better didn't get pregnant." Kikyo said half jokingly. "Anyway the most amazing things have happened to me while you were gone! Go get me some orange juice and I'll tell you all about it."

Kagome couldn't help letting out a bitter laugh, "Sure Kikyo anything for you." With that she went to fix her cousin a drink.

A Month and a Half later

"Kagome dear are you ok?" Totasi asked pushing his plate away from him losing his will to eat at seeing his niece lose her breakfast all over the dinning room floor. "You've been throwing up a lot lately."

Kagome shook her feeling absolutely horrible as the servant entered the room and began cleaning it up.

"I'll help you." Kagome said softly.

"I'm telling you she's pregnant." Kikyo said her hand over her nose.

"Is that true Kagome!" Kadea asked.

"No!" Kagome shouted. When truthfully she didn't have a clue and it was something she was beginning to worry about.

"I mean that's ridiculous." Kagome said softly avoiding looking at anyone.

"It better be because if you were you couldn't live here anymore. Bring such a disgrace to the family could never be forgiven." Kadea said.

"Enough about Kagome." Kikyo cut threw the silence that had fallowed Kadea's words. "You remember mother, when I told you about the pearl shop owner?" Before Kadea could answer Kikyo was speaking again. "Well he has finally agreed to let us shoot the magazine on his island. He would have let us sooner but he said he had some problems he had to work out. Anyway he said he will be by later to discuss with me the plans." She said excitedly so excited she didn't notice the horrified look on Kagome's face.

"Coming here?" Kagome asked disbelief clearly on her face.

Kikyo frowned at her cousin. "Isn't that what I just said?"

Kagome ran a hand over her bracelet subconsciously confused and horrified at the same, she was sure it showed on her face.

"Are you ok Kagome, it looks like you just seen a ghost." Totasi asked seeing the horrified look on Kagome's face.

Kagome swallowed hard, "I'm fine." She said, but swooned a little holding onto the table to keep from falling.

"Kagome!" Totasi was up supporting Kagome. "What is wrong with you?" He said worried about his niece.

"Nothing uncle I'm just tired."Kagome said pulling away from him. She forced a smile, "I'll just go lay down." She escaped from the room.

Quickly entering her room she closed the door behind her leaning against the door her heart pounded. Closing her eyes tightly she tried to calm her racing heart. Why was he coming here? She thought moving from her door sitting on the bed.

Subconsciously her hand went to her stomach, silently praying that she wasn't pregnant.

"I'll avoid him." She said softly to herself standing from the bed taking her purse from the nightstand.

()

Kagome's hands sweated profusely and she wiped them multiple times on her dress. She was starting to regret coming to the clinic instead of taking some home pregnancy at home. At the time it felt like a good idea, it got her away from home and away from the chance of running into Sesshomaru, and it would be 100% accurate. Now waiting on the doctor to return with the news was nothing but torture for Kagome. Along with all the sneaking around to make sure no one saw her.

When the door opened and the balding man came in Kagome held her breath.

The doctor smiled at Kagome, "Congratulations, you are 2 months pregnant."

Kagome's eyes filled with tears as her hand covered her mouth to keep the sob in. She was shocked and at a total lost as to what to do.

The doctor seeing the reaction quickly left the room.

()

Sesshomaru removed his sunglasses as he waited for someone to open the door, when the smiling Kikyo opened the door Sesshomaru had to hold in the annoyed groan as she hugged him.

"Sorry I'm late I had some travel issues." Sesshomaru said.

Kikyo shook her head smiling, "it's fine." She pulled Sesshomaru into the house.

"Sit right there I'll go get you something to drink." She said.

Sesshomaru forced a smile nodding as the women skipped into the kitchen. He looked around the house wondering if in one of the rooms Kagome was in one. He dreaded having to come here just as much as he needed it. He desperately wanted to see Kagome again but was aware that she would have no desire to see him.

"Here you are." Kikyo returned handing a glass of orange juice to Sesshomaru then taking a seat beside him.

Sesshomaru sighed wishing that this meeting wasn't necessary, but it was. The engagement had already been set and he had put it away as long as he could now he couldn't just back out of it without hurting his reputation. So he was stuck with Kikyo for now.

"How is your health Sesshomaru? You look like your not feeling well." Kikyo said.

Sesshomaru forced another smile shaking his head, "I'm fine..." He trailed.

"Is there anyone else home?" He couldn't help but ask.

Kikyo frowned but then smiled moving closer to Sesshomaru seeming to think his question had another meaning.

"No," She said. "My parents are visiting friends and my cousin" She paused. "Well I'm not sure, she'll probably disappear for 3 months like last time. Anyway so we are alone."

She leaned forward onto Sesshomaru who made a effort to move away.

When the front door opened and a puffy eyed Kagome walked in and froze staring at the scene before her, her eyes met a Sesshomaru's

"Kagome!" Kikyo shouted. "Why are you just staring like that?"

Kagome shook her head coming back to earth she looked away from Sesshomaru feeling nauseous.

Kikyo stood moving towards Kagome pulling her over to Sesshomaru who stood.

"Kagome, this is Sesshomaru the pearl farm owner I told you about, and Sesshomaru this is my cousin Kagome." Kikyo said.

Kagome couldn't breath and she felt like the little food she had eaten would soon surface again, she didn't dare look at Sesshomaru.

"Nice to meet you." She heard the voice of her ex tormentor say.

"Kagome, what's wrong with you?" Kikyo said angrily at Kagome at her lack of response.

Kagome could feel his eyes on her and she couldn't take it she had to get out of there. Finally she looked up at Sesshomaru and his outstretched hand.

With shaking hands she took his outstretched hand shaking it before taking her hand back.

"Nice to meet you." She said softly.

The sound of a car horn broke the staring contest between Kagome and Sesshomaru.

"Ah, that must be Hanna." Kikyo said. "Keep him company will you, I'll be right back."

Before Kagome could object Kikyo was already out the door leaving Kagome and Sesshomaru alone.

Kagome went to leave because she felt like she was going to throwing up all over, and Sesshomaru's presence was too much for her.

"Wait," Sesshomaru said.

For some reason Kagome did pausing before turning to look at him.

"Why are you here." Kagome asked her voice heavy with tears. Her head was shaking in disbelief.

Sesshomaru paused before answering taking in her appearance. She looked sickly and pale which worried him, but the pearl bracelet around her wrist gave a small glimmer of hope.

"It's not by choice." He said softly. "I had already began a project with the company your cousin works for, I can't just cancel it."

The way his eyes ran over her made her feel even more sick she went to leave again but found herself dashing to the closes bathroom bent over emptying her lunch.

The pair of hands that pulled her hair back wasn't refused as she finished collapsing.

"Are you sick?" She heard Sesshomaru ask as he took a towel from the counter wiping her mouth.

Kagome breathed heavily frozen as to what to do, what to say. Should she tell him? She thought.

"What's going on in here?" Kikyo stood at the door frowning.

That broke Kagome's daze as she pushed Sesshomaru's hand away and dashed from the room all the way to her room collapsing onto her bed sobbing.

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