Back with some more for you, and still writing. It's been a very good week.
I hope you are enjoying and still reading. Thank you guys for the support.
Disclaimer: Gilmore Girls and all included entities belong to ASP and affiliates.
Chapter 9 - * Starts With Goodbye
I was sitting on my doorstep
I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand
But I knew I had to do it
And he wouldn't understand
So hard to see myself without him
I felt a piece of my heart break
But when you're standing at a crossroad
There's a choice you gotta make
Rory looks at Logan, who is sitting across from her at Rich Man's Shoe.
"Just call him already." He insists.
"Why?" She sips her beer. Guinness, since Palm Springs it's her new favorite beer.
"You know why, Ace. You miss him, he misses you." Logan also takes a swig of his. This is their usual weekly lunch together. Or at least it has been since right before Thanksgiving when her and Finn had a fight.
"If he misses me so much he'd have called by now."
"He could say the same thing about you."
She sets her drink down and glares dagger at him, "Sure he could, but he'd be wrong. He was the one acting like 2 year old. All "my dick's bigger then yours.""
"I thought you said it was all his wallet was bigger then Jess's?' He teases her.
"Same difference."
The waitress brings them both their food and senselessly flirts with Logan. He doesn't respond. Rory had to laugh. Logan acts oblivious to the flirtation.
"Maybe, but I'll tell you again, if you were with me and you suddenly were going to dinner with your ex behind my back I'd be mad too."
"It wasn't behind his back. He was there. Remember, pissing contest and all?"
"I didn't forget, but I also remember that initially he wasn't suppose to be. He just showed up early and there you were."
"What? Now I can't have guy friends? What about you? Huh? Should I not be having lunch with you cause Finn wasn't informed first? When did we go back to the 50's?"
Logan puts his hands up in self-defense, "Don't shoot. I'm just being honest with you. What if he was out with another girl."
"He's practically with Stephanie all the time and I don't get all crazy on him"
"But it bothers you doesn't it? Don't even deny it, I can hear it in your voice."
"Well of course it does. Why is his father so against me being anywhere near the business? I thought he liked me."
"He does, Ace. But right now you're just some girl at Yale dating his son, who's soon to be heading up the company."
"He's perfectly fine with Stephanie, and look at your dad he keeps asking me to come to events and I'm not even dating you."
"He what?" Logan is caught off guard. "Excuse me."
"Yeah, last week he took me to the New Yorker offices and showed me around. He said it's not even close to how beautiful the Tribune is, but to me it looks like a museum. He asked me to come to this cocktail thingy at the HPG this weekend. You didn't know?"
"So, you're what hanging out with my dad? I thought he killed all your hopes and dreams. Hell you dropped out of school."
"Yeah, well he called and we talked, and he's really just every bit the man I read about. He's well spoken and we talked about me maybe starting to do some ghost writing for a few people he's go pending book deals for, or editing and in the future maybe trying my own hand at a book. He's really lovely, Logan."
"Ok I'm not sure what in the hell is going on here, but he most certainly is not lovely. And he's really offering a job to a collage drop out? Somehow that doesn't sound right even for him."
"Well, that's what I said, but he's going to help me get back in. He's right, and you were right, and Finn was right. I love school and I love writing and I need to finish this but I'm not sure that Yale is that place."
"Yale is Yale Ace, come on unless you're transferring to Harvard.." suddenly it dawns on him, "He's getting you into Harvard?"
"No, Logan I'm not transferring to Harvard."
He's relived. It would kill him to not see her all the time. And more importantly it would kill Finn. So far he's kept most of what the talk about to himself. It's no secret that they are still friends, but he's refused to get in the middle of this argument. Besides Finn has taken this opportunity to take some time away from school and work from home, or wherever the hell he's been emailing Logan from.
"So no Harvard. Is he finally using his powers for good and getting you a late start back at Yale?"
"I think I'm gong to Stanford." She finally answers. It's almost a whisper and she looks up at him, almost shyly though her long lashes. She's nervous.
"STANFORD?! As in California, Stanford?!" He's trying not to panic.
"The very same."
"When would you leave?"
"Soon. I'd start when classes start again the beginning of January."
That's less then two weeks away. How can she and Finn let the fight get this far.
"I'm assuming Finn doesn't know. Is this all because of the fight?" He asks in disbelief.
"No." she shakes her head vehemently. "Him being a jealous ass of Jess is annoying, but not a reason to run. It's not that. But with this over, it's one less reason to stay."
"What about your mom?" He's trying to hide his panic.
"She's teetering between being not happy and being thrilled I'll be back in school. I have to let your dad know tomorrow and if I say yes, I'll be gone by the end of the week."
"Why California" he questions. He can't believe his dad did this, behind his bank. What the fuck was he trying to accomplish?
"It's not here." She says matter-of-fact. "I just, I feel like I've lived my whole life in this one small place."
"New york and New Haven are not exactly smalls towns, Ace."
"No, but to me it just seems like with them all roads lead back to Stars Hallow, and my mom. I mean Logan," she looks at him all seriousness, "I feel like I've been living my life for my mom. Doing the things she didn't have the chance to do, and it's wonderful that I have those opportunities, but I want to be my own person, not just Lorelai 2.0."
"And that means California." He states. Everything she's saying is the truth, and heartfelt, and he can see just how much she needs it, but damn it, if it's not killing him, and he hasn't even been able to show her how he feels, like Finn has and this… this is going to kill Finn.
"You sound like you've already said yes."
"Because I have." She holds up her phone to show him the text message to his father that say yes.
First his mind is blown that not only is his father using text messaging, but also he's using it with her. Why are his fingerprints all over this situation?
"You can't go." He says.
"And why is that?"
"You have to tell him."
She refuses to call Finn and Logan doesn't know if he should tell him or not. He has to tell him. Finn is his best friend.
"If he calls me, I'll tell him, Logan, but it's been over a month. I don't see him caring if I leave or not."
The meal ends shortly, and he's sat mostly quiet listening to Rory make her plans for the move and she tells him about all the time she's been spending with his asshole of a father and when he finally heads out, alone, he decides he needs to talk to Finn. This stupid argument has gone on long enough.
I guess it's gonna have to hurt
I guess I'm gonna have to cry
And let go of some things I've loved
To get to the other side
I guess it's gonna break me down
Like fallin' when I'm try to fly
It's sad but sometimes
Moving on with the rest of your life
Starts with goodbye
"You can't be seriously leaving in two days kids!" Lorelai exclaims
Rory's room is in complete distress. Half packed boxes of what's left at the Stars Hallow house that she intends to take to Stanford.
The younger Gilmore gives her moms a pointed look,
"Ok ok, I get it. You're back in school. The lest I can do pretend I'm excited for you." Lorelai holds her hands up.
"I would HOPE my mom would actually BE happy for me. Stanford is a top school." She goes back to packing. Things have been and still are strained after she refused to let her move home and take some time off.
Sure it wasn't what Lorelai wanted for her daughter, but Rory is so tired of having to hold her moms past discretions on her shoulders. She's not her mom. Sure they are a lot alike, she loves her mother, but her mother's dreams are not hers and this life, simple and here in Stars Hallow is her moms dreams of a perfect life, not hers.
Granted she's not entirely sure what her perfect life looks likes anymore, but that's the whole point. She doesn't want to settle. She doesn't want to settle for anything. Not the small town, not the boy that doesn't trust her, not the career. This is her life and somehow it feels like if she's doesn't create some distance, some sort of differences, between her and her mom now, she may end up living her mom's exact life. That life is wonderful for her mom, but she's not her mom.
"I am happy for you kid. I'm just gonna miss you. I've been missing you." Lorelai says forlorn.
"I wanted to come home, mom. All I wanted was time."
"I know. I know." Lorelai wants desperately to change the subject. She hops up and tosses a stuffed animal into one of Rory's boxes, "So, I know you have a ton of packing to do, here and the grandparent, but tonight it's you, me some red vines and something truly horrifying… a Tori Spelling lifetime movie marathon to top all marathons."
Rory is reluctant to stay but she also knows this will be the last time she will see her mom, for awhile, and right now there's no where else she needs to be. Paris is still mad at her for not coming back to Yale, Logan has called several times but she's not really ready to say goodbye to the person that's becomes her best friend lately, and Finn, well she still hasn't heard from him, so all of Logan's arguments about them are moot. Lane has been there every step, but she's so involved with what's going on in her life that it has to take priority and she completely understands that.
"Ok," she relents, "But only if tacos are involved too, and some ice-cream for desert."
"Deal!" Lorelai shouts and grabs her purse off of the counter. "I'm going to Al's and then Taylor's and don't think I'm NOT stopping at Luke's for some donuts."
"Toodles." Rory shouts after her mom as she pack her box of cornstarch in a box that she plans to take. You gotta remember the good, with the bad.
I know there's a blue horizon
Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me
Getting there means leaving things behind
Sometimes life's so bitter sweet
I guess it's gonna have to hurt
I guess I'm gonna have to cry
And let go of some things I've loved
To get to the other side
"One bottle of beer on the wall, one bottle of beer. You take one down and pass it around…"
Finn opens the front door of the pool house at his parent's house where Logan has finally located him, and he see a very stout looking Logan. "Mate! I'm down to one bottle of beer… what's happening after that?" He slurs at his friend.
"Where the hell have you been?" Logan shouts over Finn's singing as he closes the door behind him. "And why aren't you answering your phone? I've been calling for days."
Finn holds up a rather large cup of something brownish to show his friend his fully immersed cell phone. "At first I thought maybe it's broken cause even tough I kept trying to call her I couldn't get it to do it, and then suddenly mate, I realized it's been so long that I haven't gotten a call from she who shall not be named, and I then I figured, fuck it. Phones not working at all."
Logan makes him a cup of coffee as he clears out the empty bottles from the counter and sink. "You need to drink this and I need to talk to talk to you about Ace, ok and you need to really hear me."
"Ace. Ace. Ace. You need to talk to me about Ace. Of course, Ace. Always, Ace. She has a name you know. Love. I call her Love. Call her Love, or mother. No wait those are mine, how about you just call her, her name."
"Mother?" Logan raises an eyebrow. "You know that sounds incestuous, right."
"Not nearly as incestuous as my best mate having his own personal nickname for my bird."
"You're drunk, and clearly not listening to me. Drink this. Sober up and then, We'll talk."
"Talk. I was wondering if you were going to break the news to me that you and her were finally running off into the sunset together, but then I thought maybe you'd come here to inform me that, ACE, " he says sarcastically, "has taken up with that leather jacket wearing reformed bad boy, cause really mate, that would just serve me right."
"You really are daft, man. Your problems with Rory, are your problems, but you're not going to have long to fix them if you don't get your ass sober."
"Sober hasn't done me any good, of course neither has drunk.." he ponders.
"She's leaving, you fool." Logan shouts.
"What?" He questions. Suddenly feeling more sober then he's ever been.
"She's leaving. Apparently she's got some sort of strange friendship with my old man.."
"Satan incarnate."
"Not to her. To her he's the guy encouraging her to keep writing, and editing and has gotten her into the next semester at Stanford."
"The paper she interned at?"
"NO! Man, come on. Use your head. Not Stamford, Stanford, as in California. She's leaving soon, and if you don't pull your head out of your ass it will be too late."
Logan leaves the still untouched cup of coffee on the counter and closes the door behind him. He's always known his friend was bone headed but he can't believe he's really just going to let her leave. Rory Gilmore isn't someone you just let walk out of your life easily. He lost his chance, and maybe his friend isn't as smart as he thinks, because he had her. He had her in his arms and in her heart, and he lost her.
I guess it's gonna break me down
Like fallin' when I'm try to fly
It's sad but sometimes
Moving on with the rest of your life
Starts with goodbye
Time heals the wounds that you feel
Somehow, right now
I guess it's gonna have to hurt
I guess I'm gonna have to cry
And let go of some things I've loved
To get to the other side
"I don't believe she only got her jobs because of her father. The girl has talent."
Rory looks at her like she's grown a second head.
"I'm just saying. She's a lifetime movie queen." Lorelai says as she bites into a licorice and mutes the credits of Co-ed Call girl.
Rory laughs again at her mom as her phone rings. She answers it as she goes into the kitchen to get more soda.
"Hey stranger." She says into the mouthpiece.
"So I know I'm a complete ass but please tell me that you're not leaving just because I'm an ass."
Rory confused fills her cup with ice, "A brat maybe, Steph but not an ass." She laughs. The girl is definitely spoiled, but she's not an ass.
"Seriously?" the girl breaths an audible sigh of relief, "Thank you so much. I know Jose is not my friend, and I never intended on hurting you. I just let Mr. Cuervo get the best of me. Thankfully for both of us you're boyfriend is the loyal type."
Rory stop and puts her glass on the counter and opens the porch door and steps outside.
"Loyal type…" she repeats slowly what her friend is saying. Confused, a huge pit growing in her stomach.
"It's just been so hard lately with guy. Like being rich is no longer enough for them and after all those damn cocktail parties and I tried again to get with Adam from the Upper Adams' and the old money and he basically told me I was shallow, I mean me, shallow? Of course I'm shallow, but I'm rich and hot and I have a good heart and I'd make a damn good society wife, and we were alone and I just didn't even think and we were both more then a little tipsy after all the cheers from our parents using us to seal their deals and we kissed and I just didn't even think Rory, and we didn't even sleep together, just hooked up a bit and he stopped me, and we, I mean I , we stopped because he loves you, and it was just stupid and when I hadn't heard from you and then suddenly I'm hearing that you're leaving and moving to California, and going to Stanford? I just thought, well I thought the worst. I kept saying, I know Rory loves me to death, I mean I'm gorilla girl, right, and you know your imagination takes over and I'm so glad that it's not the reason you're leaving. In fact I'm not really happy you're leaving at all. You're like my best friend, I don't have a lot of female friends and I'm just relieved and I'm so sorry."
She's been babbling for the last 5 minutes and Rory is now sitting on the back steps of the house. It's cold and she should be wearing a MUCH warmer sweater and jacket and yet she's numb. 5 minutes ago she thought things between her and Finn had ended because of his inane jealously of Jess and her idiocy when it came to how she handled the Jess situation and instead, it's because he and Stephanie were hooking up.
"Rory…" Stephanie says, as there's been silence on the other end of the line.
"You and Finn…" is all Rory can muster.
This time there is silence on the blonde's end, "He didn't tell you." She says. It's a statement, not a question.
"I have to go, Stephanie. Goodbye." Rory hangs up with phone without any other words from her so called friend. She's already heard too much. She hears her mom moving around in the kitchen and it draws her out of her thoughts. She wants to go inside. Maybe her mom will let her forgo the end of the TS festival. She really wants to go back to her grandparents and go to bed.
She opens the door and as she enters the living room again, she hears her mom, "What are you doing here."
She round the corner and sees Logan standing at her from door. Her mother has never liked him, though she can't figure out why. He's a good guy.
"I just wanted to say goodbye to Rory." He says.
"It's ok mom." She says as Lorelai ushers him inside. "I need a new cup." She says as she excuses herself and leaves them alone.
"Hey." He says.
"Hey." She replies and hugs him.
"What's wrong?" he asks.
"What makes you think something is wrong?"
"You have your sad face on."
"I'm smiling." She says in reply.
"It doesn't reach your eyes." He looks down and she grabs her jacket.
"We're going for a walk, mom" she yells over her shoulder and he follows her out the door.
They walk in silence for a few minutes. Stopping at the Gazebo, covered in snow and twinkle lights they sit inside.
"How long has it been going on?" she asks him. She'd much rather be asking Finn, but he won't talk to her.
"How long has what been going on?"
"Finn and Stephanie." She can't take her eyes off her hands.
"What are you talking about?" He confused. "There is no Finn and Stephanie. There should be Finn and You but you two are too stubborn."
"That's not what Stephanie says. She just called to ask me if her and Finn "hooking up" is why I'm leaving. You're his best friend. I figured you'd know."
"I know nothing. Rory, I don't think it's true, he's miserable without you."
"Not that miserable." She says.
He doesn't know what to say. Stephanie is defiantly a poor little rich girl, but she's not a liar. He's afraid to think that his best friend really did this. Of course he's not really sure what Stephanie's version of hooking up is. But he's pretty sure that far as Ace is concerned it doesn't matter. She's hurt.
"I'm so sorry, Ace." He puts his arm around her. "He loves you. I know he does."
"It doesn't matter anymore. I'm leaving tomorrow night."
"I can't imagine not seeing you anymore Ace. Don't be surprised if you suddenly get a text that I've stolen my dad's jet and I'm coming for a visit."
She laughs, "Don't do that. He's the one responsible for this opportunity."
"He's definitely responsible for something." He groans.
"He's not the devil you think he is. At lest not to me."
"That's because he's hoping you'll dump Finn and marry me. He's gotta hedge his bets for adding the family tree successfully."
"Very funny." She says. She loves how close she and Logan are, and the fact that it's not about anything other then friendship makes it so much more special to her. He's her confidant, her best friend and she loves him. He's going to be missed more than he knows.
He walks her back to her moms and helps her pack the last of her things into her car. She's too tired to spend the whole night here, so she hugs her mom and lets Logan escort her back to the big house.
They talk for a few hours, just sitting outside in his car. It feels good to just laugh and not think about her failed relationship, the lost love and she aches as she watches him drive away knowing that it's good bye for now.
She can't sleep and so she wanders the house, saying goodbye to the large dinning table and Friday night dinners, the beautiful piano she would have loved to learned to play and it takes all her might to reassure her grandmother and grandfather that it's ok to say goodbye to her here instead of escorting her to the airport. Her grandfather always wanted her to graduate from his alma mater but he's just as proud of her today as he was the day she decided to go to Yale.
The drive to the airport is quick and her luggage checks in quickly too. It's only one check in and one carry on. He's grandmother insisted on paying for overnight shipping of everything else. She pulls her book out as she settles in to await boarding.
She knows it's going to be a long wait. She got here hella early, but she'd rather sit and read and wait then rush. It's been about 40 minutes and she's been rereading some Thomas Hardy when she decides it been too long without caffeine and heads off to find a Starbucks. She returns with her Grande Americana but is frustrated to find someone has taken her seat. He's reading the paper and she's at lest thankful she won't have to chit chat as she takes a empty seat near him.
"Someone steal your seat, Love."
She stops with her cup halfway to her lips when she hears his voice. What the fuck is he doing here?
She turns to him and he looks every bit as appealing to her as he always has. He's in his dark grey suit, with a light grey dress shirt and a matching tie. His jacket hangs on his shoulders as he sits with one leg stretched across the other. He looks amazing, and even from two seats away she can smell his cologne and she physically misses him. But all she can hear is Stephanie's voice in her head.
She just looks at him, unable to speak.
"You might want to take a sip of that, Love, before your mouth dries out."
Instead of taking a sip she lowers the drink and holds it in her lap.
"Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?" He asks as he leans forward and folds him hand into each other. He wants so badly to hold her hand.
"I didn't know you cared."
He doesn't know how to respond. He's in love with her. Real, true, spanning lifetimes and all the Logan/Veronica shit from Veronica Mars. She's the other part of him.
"I said a lot of things I didn't mean that night. I was missing you, and I was drunk and jealous of the boy and I had been gone so much and all I wanted to do was surprise my girl and hold her in my arms and tell her I loved her and instead I had to share you, and I didn't like it."
"I guess we have something in common then." She responds coldly and he doesn't know where she's going with it.
"We both think I'm a idiot?" he questions trying to lighten the mood.
"We both don't like sharing." She looks directly at him.
He freezes. How could she know? He'd stopped it. They'd decided to never talk about this mistake and he knew he'd had to live with the guilt for the rest of his life, but he swore he'd be a better man to make it up to her.
"You're not sharing me, Love. I love you. You know that."
"Oh, so maybe I shouldn't be jealous because I was only sharing you with Stephanie and you don't love her, is that it?"
He can hear the hurt in the tone of her voice, and it's ripping his heart out of his chest.
"How did you…"
"She was worried that I was leaving because you told me you two "Hooked up" and I didn't want to be her friend anymore. Imagine that." She interrupts him.
"It wasn't like that." He scoots down the two chairs closer to her, as he can feel her moving much father away emotionally and he wants proximity. He wasn't prepared for this.
"Please don't give me some it was just a "hook up" bullshit Finn. You shot down all the insecurities that I had shared with you about you and her always being at these events without me. You told me I was wrong, that I had nothing to worry about, that it was all your dad's stuff and that there was an end in sight. You told me…" she stops talking because she starting to get loud and she doesn't want to fight or cry in public.
"Love, it ended before it started. It was nothing." He reaches out for her hand but she pulls away.
"Ok, then you tell me what happened. I didn't ask her for the details, but I'm asking you."
He wants to lie to her, he really does. It would make things easier to just tell her it was all blown out of proportion, but she's not just any girl and he doesn't want to lie to her. He knows what he did was wrong, even if it didn't cross over into the sex.
"We were drunk, me for the first time in a long time and she was, well she's Stephanie, so she was drinking and hurting and I had called you and you didn't answer and"
"So this is my fault?" she interrupts.
"No, Love, this is all my fault, I'm just telling you the circumstances. We were alone in the lounge area and she sat beside me. We commiserated for a few minutes and then she kissed me. I didn't stop her. I kissed her back and that continued for a bit and she pushed me back and got on top of me and took her blouse off. It was like being slapped. I had only been with you since we met. Only kissed you, only seen and touched you and when I saw her, my brain finally stepped in and I stopped her. She too realized what we were doing was wrong and she put her shirt back on and that was it. It never went any further and it never happened before and it never happened after."
She doesn't say anything and he's happy that she hasn't run.
"Please don't leave. I love you. I'm not a perfect man, but I am yours." He insists.
"But you aren't mine." She looks at him tears brimming in her eyes.
"You left me in that restaurant, alone, because you has some sort of macho bullshit about sharing me with my friend, AFTER you had done whatever with Stephanie. You want me to be ok with, or accepts what happened between two people that are suppose to care about me, but you couldn't even handle me having dinner with an old friend of mine."
"I didn't say it was fair, Love. I just said I loved you."
"I love you too Finn. I do. I want to be able to just say, hey no big deal, you just made out and whatever, but I can't. You didn't even pick up the phone to apologize. Its been what almost two month now?"
"I could argue that the phone line goes both ways."
"You could, but I was the one left standing alone, and I wasn't the one that, you know you've always been a little unsure of my relationship ship with Logan, what if I came to you and said Logan I just made out for a while and you know it got to a point where I mounted him and took my shirt off and we stopped. I mean it's no big deal right."
He's stopped dead and he moves back a seat away from her. It's like he's been stabbed. She's right. If he at all heard that anything had happened between her and Logan he would be devastated, and to think he mad her feel that way. It humbles him.
"I'm sorry." He says and she can tell he is 100 percent sincere.
They sit in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes before she surprises him, "I'm not leaving because of you."
"Then why are you leaving?" he's almost begging.
"I need this. I need to do something out of my comfort zone. I need to just… jump."
He doesn't know what to say anymore. He can't beg her to say without asking her to give up on something she really wants, and while he would hesitate to ask something like this on a normal basis, it's definitely not something he would even think of asking after this.
"I really want to ask you not to go, Love. I want to ask you give me a second chance, and to kiss you and hold you and have the opportunity to be the man I know you believed me to be. But I won't. I just want you to know that I love you Rory Gilmore and if you ever need me, I will be here."
Above their head they hear the boarding call for her flight. She stands and throws her bag over her shoulder.
He stands too, a little lost and trying to hold in his emotions.
"Part of me wants to give you that second chance, Finn. I'm hurt, I won't lie, but people aren't perfect and you did stop it before it went somewhere I could never forgive. I forgive you." She reaches up and kisses him.
He closes his eyes and it's the most wonderful feeling he's ever felt, until she pulls away.
"But I have to take this opportunity, and that means letting go of something here. I'm sorry."
"You've nothing to be sorry about, Love."
Again the omnipresent voice announces the last call for boarding. She takes his hand and holds it in silence before letting it go and walking to the terminal. She doesn't look back so he can't see the tears in her eyes that she wipes away before handing the agent her ticket.
Finn stands and watches her as she walks away from him and onto the plane. He's unable to turn away and watches her until she's out of sight and still he stand and watches until the plane has taken off and is no longer able to be seen with the naked eye. She's gone. The only girl he's ever loved, ever wanted more with, ever thought about a future with, has boarded a plane and left him behind to build a new life for herself. One without him. And she's said she forgave him. It only makes matters worse for the Aussie, because she's the most amazing woman he's ever had the opportunity to know and he's lost her.
His father has been so worried about his girlfriend pulling him away from the business, and now he's gotten his wish. His son will be the perfect executive now. Focused, and driven, because what else do he have to look forward to? Graduation can't come fast enough, because until the day comes when he doesn't have see every spot on a daily basis that reminds him of her he won't be able to breathe.
I guess it's gonna break me down
Like fallin' when I'm try to fly
It's sad but sometimes
Moving on with the rest of your life
Starts with goodbye
I guess I'm gonna have to cry
And let go of some things I've loved
To get to the other side
Start with goodbye
Like fallin' when you try to fly
It's sad but sometimes
Moving on with the rest of your life
Starts with goodbye
*Lyrics are Starts With Goodbye by Carrie Underwood
