Thank you to everyone for the wonderful reviews and the votes of confidence. I'm sorry this took so long, but you know who real life can be, such a pain in the a***. I debated on making this chapter longer because there is so much more going to happen during this night, but I felt you all waited long enough and wanted to get something to you. The next chapter will post much more quickly. And without further adieu . . .
CHAPTER 9
As Bill and Sookie stepped out onto the porch, Sookie realized that Bill was right, it was a beautiful night. She also realized that she would rather be going for a walk with a certain blonde Viking. She pushed the thought out of her mind and decided to make the most of her walk with Bill.
They started along the path, walking casually, occasionally looking up at the stars in the night sky. Bill was watching Sookie as they walked. He decided to speak first. "Sookie, I must say you really do look lovely this evening."
Sookie looked to her feet. It was one thing for Bill to be so flattering to both her and Amelia, but it was a little uncomfortable for her to be complimented by Bill in such a familiar way while they were alone. She attempted to sound sincere, when she said "thank you Bill, it's so nice of you to say something like that."
Confidently, Bill replied with a smile. "It's always easy to say something so true."
Sookie gave Bill a little smile and continued walking. While Sookie was trying not to think of what Eric was doing at that moment, Bill was thinking of what lay ahead if he and Victor's plan is successful. If Victor succeeded in his coup to take over the throne and he became King, he would make Bill the Sheriff of Area Five. This would give him security and the added bonus of staying in Louisiana. Bill's first article of business would be to bring the true death to Eric Northman and he looked forward to that as much if not more than making Sookie his again. He always suspected, but now knowing that Northman's weakness was Sookie, Bill could easily bend Eric to his will, taking great pleasure in torturing the Viking before he ends him. The most important thing to Bill is that Sookie comes to him willingly. The thought of Bill having to take Sookie against her will would prove to him that not only was he no longer the gentleman he thought himself to be but it would also mean that Sookie no longer has any loving feelings towards him. Hopefully it will not come to that. Nevertheless, he is prepared to do whatever it takes.
"Bill? What you are thinking about?" Sookie asked curiously.
Snapped out of his reverie, Bill asked, "I'm sorry Sookie. What did you say?"
Sookie chuckled and said, "well, you looked like you were a million miles away. I was just wondering what you were thinking about, that's all."
Thinking quickly, Bill said, "Oh, I was just thinking how nice it is to walk with you. It reminds me of the first time we went for a walk, and if I recall, it's the first time we kissed."
Sookie stiffened a bit. "Yes, well, that was a long time ago. Many things have changed since then, including me."
"Yes, I realize that. You have changed in many ways . . . mostly for the better if I may add."
"Oh, and what's that supposed to mean?" Sookie asked
"Nothing. I just mean that you've grown so much since the first time we met. It's as if you transformed from a girl into a beautiful woman. You are a bit more serious though."
Seeing that the remark wasn't an insult, Sookie relaxed. "Yes, I suppose you're right."
They continued on their walk, talking about different things ranging from more details about his business dealings to the latest gossip at Merlotte's. Before Sookie knew it, they had passed the cemetery and were standing near the front of Bill's house. As she looked at his house, she had a flashback of the first time they kissed each other. She thought the memory would have made her feel sentimental but instead it made her uneasy. Being like this with Bill felt wrong somehow. She didn't want to be here walking down memory lane with Bill, she wanted to be with Eric. She noticed Bill was looking at her in very much the same way he looked at her that first time they kissed and she started to think that going for walk with Bill was not a good idea.
Bill sensed Sookie's apphrension and he didn't like it. "Sookie, what's wrong?"
Gathering her thoughts, Sookie said, "I'm sorry, I just don't feel right about this. The way you're looking at me is making me feel a little uncomfortable. I'm sorry, but I think I need to go home."
Realizing his error in judgment, Bill said, "I apologize Sookie, I realize after everything that's happened between us it may seem a little awkward reliving our first intimate moment, but I guess being with you . . . here . . . like this, brought back feelings I still have for you. If I offended you, I do apologize."
Sookie believed he was being sincere but knew she needed to be honest. "It's ok Bill. I do understand, and I'm not angry."
Bill cocked his head, looking at Sookie as if he was trying to read her mind. He didn't like what her eyes were telling him and realized there was more to what she was saying. "Sookie, if there's something you want to talk about, you know I'm here for you. Is there someone else?"
"NO! Sookie exclaimed. "Not really . . . maybe." Sookie was becoming flustered.
Bill was mentally scrambling at this point, seeing that simply seducing Sookie with a walk and reliving old memories were not going to be bring him his prize of winning her back. He needed to take a different approach. He also found himself disappointed at the thought of there being someone else. Who could this man be that has her so conflicted? Wait . . . no . . . it couldn't be . . .!
"Sookie, we may not be lovers anymore, but I still consider us friends, and above all things, your happiness means everything to me. Whatever it is, you can tell me."
Sookie considered Bill's words. She knew they weren't lovers anymore, but she also remembered why and, for a moment, she was angry. He had lied and betrayed her. But she also knew that he cared for her very deeply despite what he'd done and would have given his life for her on the night of the takeover. Maybe I could trust him. I know he's not a fan of Eric's but he does want my happiness. Right?
"It's sort of complicated Bill. Besides, I'm also not real big about sharing my feelings either." Sookie was surprised at herself. Normally, she would've just told him it was none of his business. But Bill was right, she has changed.
Bill looked over and saw a bench for them to sit down. "Sookie, let's sit," as he guided her over to the bench.
They sat there for a few minutes looking up at the sky. Sookie was trying to find the words and Bill was trying to be patient, giving her the space she needed to feel comfortable. He knew he needed to play up the friend card, big time.
Sookie decided the less she told Bill about her feelings for Eric, the better off she may be, but she also knew she had to say something, so she started. "It's not that I'm purposely keeping quiet, it's just that, well, since the takeover, I've had a lot of time to think about my life and all the things that have happened over the last two years and I realized . . ." She stalled and Bill saw that.
He looked at her and said, "it's ok Sweetheart, you can tell me." Calling her by his old pet name for her always worked like a charm.
Sookie's expression softened as she had a memory of her and Eric lying in bed. With a soft smile, she looked at Bill in the eyes and said, "I realized . . . I have feelings . . . for Eric. That's all."
I can see she's holding back. She's not telling me everything. But why? Unless of course . . . she's in love with him. The thought of Sookie loving Eric would be enough to send Bill into a rage, but he controlled himself.
Bill looked away as he asked the question he did not want to know the answer to. "Sookie, are you in love with him?"
Sookie didn't feel she had to answer Bill's question, but she also knew that Bill knew her well enough to know if she was lying. With a new resolve, she said "yes Bill, I am."
His eyes closed and his shoulders slumped not wanting to believe he just heard the words he never wanted to hear, but when he turned to look Sookie in the eyes, Bill knew, in his undead heart, that her words were the truth. He also knew from reading Eric's letter to Sookie that he had feelings for her. A jab of devastation pierced through him. He also found himself determined more than ever to take her from the Viking.
Bill stood up and took a few steps away from her, trying to remain calm. He turned to her and said "ERIC! Are you telling me that after everything Eric Northman has done to you and knowing the kind of vampire he is, are you really telling me that you are in love with him?"
Sookie got angry. She stood up, straightened her shoulders and said "Yes, that is exactly what I'm telling you Bill Compton."
Seeing these turn of events, Bill knew it was becoming more likely that he would have to take Sookie against her will, but he still wanted to avoid that if he could. She has no idea what Eric has been doing over the last six weeks. Stay calm. Stay calm. You'll get nowhere with this approach.
"I apologize Sookie, but I don't think I could have ever prepared myself for you to tell me that you are in love with Eric Northman. I was . . . caught off guard. Forgive me."
Sookie calmed down a little, but only a little. If this was a year ago, Bill would be watching her backside as she walked away from him, rescinding his invitation on her way to her home. But that Sookie was gone. As angry has she was with Bill's tone, she also knew that no matter what happened between her and Eric, she never wanted to lose Bill as a friend. At one time, he was an important part of her life and she still held that dear.
Instead she said, "I can see that I did." Chuckling with just a hint of sarcasm.
Bill walked over and sat down on the bench. He was still mad, but more in control. "Yes I apologize for acting how I did just now. But I hope you understand why this news would surprise me. I look at the both of you and the differences are like day and night." Bill actually chuckled at his own pun. Sookie smiled, not remembering Bill ever having any real sort of sense of humor. She went over and sat beside him. She understood whatever he had to say, he needed to get it out. She decided to let him.
Looking at Sookie, Bill continued. "Sookie, it's just that . . . you are so filled with light, and goodness. In all the time I've known you, you have always put others before you, even risking yourself for others you don't know. Even before I knew Eric personally, his reputation for ruthlessness was well known. He can be devious and cruel. I've witnessed his darkness more times than I'd like to admit and one thing has always been evident. In Eric Northman's world, he comes first, and no one else." Bill was almost pleading by this time. "You are special Sookie and Eric would do and say anything to make you his. To him, you'd be his greatest prize. He'd use you for your body, your blood and your gift. Please explain to me how you could have love someone like Eric Northman."
Somewhat deflated from his rant, it was time for Sookie to cue Bill in on a few things.
"Bill, believe me, I understand how crazy the thought of me loving someone like Eric is. I also know that yes, he did put me in some bad situations, and he has done things that have made me madder than hell. But he never forced me to do anything I wasn't willing to do. No matter how diabolical you think Eric is, I have been and always will be my own woman, and no one makes me do anything I don't want to do. Now you may believe that Eric is this devious Vampire who would resort to anything to get what he wants, and I can't say that I disagree, but not when it comes to me. Looking back I realize that Eric has always been there for me. Anytime I was in danger, anytime I needed anything, he was there. He's risked his own life to save me many times. I'm sorry if you don't want to believe this, but I don't know anyone who would do for me what Eric has if all I was to him was some prize."
Bill had a thought. She never saw the letter. She really doesn't know if he feels the same way about her. Hmmm, time to find out.
"Is Eric aware of your feelings for him? Bill asked leadingly.
"No he's not. I haven't seen or spoken to him pretty much since the takeover. Why do you ask?"
Here's my chance. "Well, what makes you think he truly has feelings for you? I'm just curious why you haven't been in contact."
Sookie just shrugged her shoulders and said, "well I just assumed he was being occupied with your new King and would contact me when Felipe goes back to Las Vegas."
"I see. So you don't even know if he feels the same way about you that you feel about him?"
Shyly, Sookie says, "Well . . . no, not for sure."
Bill is almost smirking now, but instead he masks his elation with a sympathetic look. "Sweetheart, I would never want to deliberately hurt you after everything you've been through, but I truly believe that Eric is not the one for you."
Back to sarcastic, Sookie asked, "oh really? And why is that Bill."
Bill began lying through his fangs. "Well, first of all, Felipe has been back in Las Vegas for almost two weeks, so if Eric wanted to contact you, believe me, he has had the time to do it. Secondly, when I came back from my trip last night I had to report to Eric at Fangtasia. When I arrived, Pam told me that Eric was expecting me. When I got to his office door I opened it without thinking and there was Eric entangled in a sexual act with one of his usual . . . ladies."
Sookie almost felt sick at the thought of Eric having sex with someone else, but she was even sicker at the thought that she's been alone, for over a month, putting herself through all sorts of hell while Eric is off fucking fangbangers. Oh My God! That's what Pam must've meant when she said Eric was indisposed! Despite her turmoil, Sookie noticed that Bill seemed a little eager in sharing this information with her. Maybe he's just trying to protect me?
Not wanting Bill to see how much she was affected by what he told her, Sookie said "Well, technically we aren't together, and he doesn't know how I feel about him, so he has a right to do what he wants."
This was not exactly the reaction Bill was looking for but he wasn't done. "That's not all Sookie. After my meeting with Eric, he left me with a specific order not to tell you about what I witnessed and that if I did tell, I would face an extremely harsh punishment. I didn't think about it at that moment, but it occurred to me afterwards that perhaps his angle is to seduce you in order to make you his, securing his position all the more with the King."
Defensively, Sookie replied. "That doesn't make sense. Why would Eric go through the trouble when I'm already under the protection of the King?"
Hiding his smugness over his quick thinking, Bill answered. "That is true, as long as you are under the King's protection, no one can harm you. However, if Eric were to make you his, it would undoubtedly make him more valuable to the King because Eric would have sole power over you. He could contract you out for your gift and earn substantially more money in the process. Luckily for you, the only way in which Eric could be successful is if he bonded himself to you. Thankfully, you are much too sensible to fall for something like that."
His last statement hit home and Sookie felt like she got kicked in the stomach. Before she knew it, she was running in the direction of her home. She needed to be away from Bill, away from everyone to the one place she felt safe, the home she shared with Gran. Bill, of course, caught up with her and stopped her from going further. Now that he believed he had successfully planted the seed about Eric in Sookie's head, he needed to resume being the gentleman.
"Sookie? Sweetheart, you must believe me, my intention was not to hurt you. But just like Eric believed you had a right to know the truth about me back then, I believe you have a right to hear the truth about Eric. He is no good Sookie and you need to start seeing that. I realize you need your space and I understand that, but know that I will always be there for you. I love you Sookie, I always have and I always will. Good night."
Sookie stood, frozen, watching Bill leave. Suddenly, the tears started flowing. She felt herself coming apart at the seams. She turned and ran the rest of the way to her house. As soon as she was inside she allowed herself to feel the full impact of what Bill shared with her. How could I have been so stupid? Could this be the real reason why Eric bonded himself to me? Why does this happen to me? Why do I allow myself to feel anything when all it does is slap me across the face?
Sookie walked into her bedroom to grab a nightgown. It was still a bit chilly outside so she decided to grab her flannel one. She went into the bathroom, changed her clothes and washed her face. Unbelievably, she wasn't tired, so she decided to grab a book and head into the living room. She made a fire, grabbed her Gran's afghan, the one that Eric hated, and wrapped herself in it as she curled up on the couch. She made her best attempt to concentrate on her book, but she couldn't. She decided to put the book down and just stare at the fire while she thought about what Bill told her.
This is definitely not the way I saw this night going at all. I can't believe that Eric would order Bill not to tell me what he saw. But why? Could it really be that he bonded to me in order to 'contract me out'? That just doesn't make sense. Granted, Eric is pretty devious but he has always been different with me. He has gone out of his way protecting me from being exploited in the very way Bill said Eric was guilty of trying to do. Could Bill be making all of this up because he's jealous? It would make sense. He's always hated Eric and the power he has over Bill. But what if Eric hasn't been with the King and he is back in Las Vegas? What the fuck has Eric been doing all this time?
Sookie sat there for hours contemplating everything and she came to her conclusion. Suddenly feeling very tired, Sookie put out the fire and went to bed. As she lay in her bed, staring at the ceiling, she could only think of one thing: My Gran always told me to listen to my heart. My heart is telling me that Bill is wrong about Eric and that I need to talk to Eric . . . personally. And that is what I'm going to do . . . tomorrow.
And with that last thought, Sookie fell asleep.
