A/N So sorry for the late update! Wanna hear a funny story? Lately, I've been experimenting with my hair. And so, I dyed it and now, I was working on curling them. Yeah, guess what? I have my private nest on my head haha! Thank you all for your reviews, it was great reading them! I can't write back to all of you though, so I wanted to send all of you missive bear hugs! Love you all
Disclaimer: I can't and I don't :(
When Reid woke up, he was more than a little surprised by someone's presence next to him. He started panicking almost immediately, trying to get as far from the person as possible. When the man beside him started waking up, Spencer was on the verge of crying.
"Whoa, what's wrong?" Hotch asked, immediately alarmed, as fast as he opened his eyes and looked at the boy. At the moment he realized what that was about, he got as far from Spencer as possible, hands raised in a defensive way. "Easy Spencer, it's just me... You had a nightmare so I went to comfort you. I must have fallen asleep with you in my arms, easy, everything is okay." he soothed, getting closer and closer to the terrified genius. Luckily as soon as Hotch assured him that he wouldn't do anything bad to him, Spencer started relaxing and his breath started evening.
"I'm sorry..." he whispered after getting a couple of deep breaths. Hotch smiled warmly at that.
"You didn't do anything wrong, Spencer." he assured, getting closer with each word. "How are you feeling?" he asked, concern visible in his eyes.
"Yeah, I'm fine, thank you..." Reid mumbled, not sounding convincingly.
"Reid, you know I have to ask you what happened, right?" Hotch asked. It was bugging him since the first time Spencer almost had a heart attack from getting into the physical contact with the floor.
"Hotch... It's nothing you should worry about, really, I'm fine..." Spencer swallowed hard and looked down at his shoes.
"Reid, if you don't tell me, I won't be able to help..."
"I don't need help..."
"Yes, you do! You are afraid of the touch, you see blood everywhere! This does require help from someone. And I don't want to tell you what kind of help from what kind of someone. Maybe if you tell me, there won't be any need to go to the... doctor with that..." He looked at the genius, trying to get his attention and he did. Unfortunately.
"I'm not crazy..." Spencer whispered, looking up with fear in his eyes and voice.
"Then tell me what's going on... Otherwise, I'll have to assume you are." Hotch answered steadily, though he wanted to wrap his arms around Reid and tell him that he was not crazy and that everything was going to be okay.
"Alright... But... You mustn't tell anyone, especially Simon, John or Scarlet, about it." when he received a nod from Hotch, he sat down on the chair and started telling the story. "As you know, my childhood wasn't happy and nice at all... It was actually a living hell, though I couldn't complain. For my mother. But the memories... My damn eidetic memory remembered every part of my life. I-I was actually thinking about committing suicide once I was eighteen. And just before I-I did it, there was a voice in my brain... You know, when Setton was experimenting on me, he changed parts of me. He locked up most of my power in another soul he created from mine own which is now leaving inside me. We coexist. And it is so much powerful than my body, but I can keep it in check somehow. We speak sometimes. It was that voice that offered me help. He would keep every memory, all the pain away from me... But only if I had a reason to live. And, as you can possibly imagine by now, that reason was my mother. But... But she died. So now, every memory of my past and all the pain that were kept away from me, are coming back. Everything keeps flowing into my head and I can't stop it and it hurts and I want it to stop and I know I can't and it scares me and-" he couldn't finish his small break down because of strong arms wrapping around him tightly.
"Shh, it's okay, Spencer..." Hotch whispered, soothingly. "I'll help you. Easy, I'll make it all stop. I promise." he murmured and let the boy cry into his T-shirt as long as he needed.
"...How?" Spencer mumbled after he managed to calm down.
"You have to tell me what happened to you. Everything that keeps on playing in your mind."
"No..." Spencer begged. "Please, don't make me say it..."
"You know if you want to keep your sanity you'll have to let it go eventually, right?"
"I know... But... Can I... Do I have to?"
"You don't. But you'll feel better after that."
"...Okay..." Spencer whispered. "Are you ready to hear it?" when he received a nod, he took a deep breath and started. "When I was young, I...uh...you know about the bullying thing... Well, the goal post, I'm sure Morgan told you about it. But the goal post was the nicest thing they did to me. There were so much other things that scare me even now so much that I wake up crying. They...uh...they would undress me and leave me in a classroom for someone to find. It was usually the class with a teacher. No one did anything with it. There were times they would come to my house and...and scare my mother, they would trigger a bad episode and leave me with my unstable, violent mother..." he took a deep breath. "And with an abusive father..." he stopped.
"What did he do?" Hotch asked as calm as he could manage with being as angry as possible.
"H-he would... He would... hurt... hurt me... Touch, beat, r-rape..." at that moment, Spencer couldn't keep the tears from falling. "It was always like that... He wanted to-to do the same with my mother, so-so I stopped him each time and-and he would... do it again... to me... with my mom watching, triggering next episode... One day, it-it only got worse, I was barely alive and my dad misjudged my state so he ran away so as not to receive be sentenced. And-and I am a mutant so-so I can't die... I healed my wounds and I and my mom lived together for some months. Then, Setton got me..." he started hyperventilating so Hotch put his arms around him, again, and waited for his young genius to calm down, again. "And... He would-he would torture me and-and he wouldn't let me go out of the room... he-he wouldn't let me see my mother... I-I didn't know if she was alive but he-he wouldn't tell me... He would just-just keep cutting me, drugging me, beating me, setting me on fire... Everything... Without anything to ease the pain... I-I had to-to deal with it for-for-I can't even remember for how long... All I do remember is when they helped me... Annie, Scarlet, Simon and John... They became my new family, they helped me... And they loved me... Or so I thought... It's just... Too much at once... I can't... not Annie... Did you know she was the love of my life? My first love? Yeah, I knew that 'first loves not always bloom' but, hey, I secretly hoped that ours would be an exception. It just... hurts too much, I guess?" he ended, hiding deep in Hotch's chest.
Aaron looked at his young subordinate, he wanted to kiss him on the head, he wanted to comfort him so bad, but how could he? What could he do to make it all feel better?
And right before the silence had a chance to start getting awkward, they heard the knock to the door.
"Come in!" Hotch yelled right after he pulled Spencer back.
"Hi, are you feeling any better, Spence?" JJ asked as she entered the room.
"Yeah, thanks..." he answered anxiously.
"Hey, Hotch, we've got something. I think you should come and see it." she added, looking relieved by her friend's usual attitude.
"Alright, Reid, you going or staying?" Hotch smiled softly when Spencer nodded and stood up.
"Of course I'm going, Hotch. We're going to catch her and then, we'll put them both in the jail. Sounds good? I don't feel like killing any of them, they don't really deserve it." Spencer smiled reassuringly. It was all it took from both his friends to grin widely, as they were sure that he was going to be okay. Not now, but soon enough. They could manage.
"So, what do we have?" Hotch asked when they finally entered the room where the two teams were talking about the case.
"Well, nice of you to finally join us." Simon joked but then yelped in pain when Scarlet hit him across the head. "What!? I was kidding! No need to get offensive!" he scowled and everyone laughed. These two had the ability to lighten everyone's mood without much effort.
"He's talking. I don't know why, but he is." Kingston answered.
"He might be lying though..." Spencer spoke up warily, looking at the other doctor on the other side of the mirror.
"Well, he might but then, he might not. He's crazy, we don't have to understand him, we don't have to profile him. We know everything about him and he knows everything about us. All we need to do is to make him talk and we did it. Let's listen and try out some new methods." Morgan stated, never as calm and collected as then. They all nodded.
"So... Who's going to interrogate him?" Rossi asked.
"We hoped you would, Dave." Emily answered slowly. He looked at her, trying not to show the shock on his face.
"Why should I?"
"Well, come on, Rossi, you're the best!" Spencer laughed when he looked at his friend's futile attempt to hide the emotions. They all smiled at him, seeing his attitude and being so totally relieved by it. Their genius was going to be okay, that was everyone's thought.
"Alright, but I might just punch him. You asked for it!" Rossi yelled, opening the door to the interrogation room and slamming it with his usual smirk playing on his lips.
"Well, hello, Agent Rossi." Setton grinned at him, his creepy grin reminding everyone of the one of every psychopath's.
"Hi there, Dr. Setton. Would you like to start an interrogation?"
"I would love to."
"Than, maybe we'll start with the easiest question: why did you decide to help us?"
"You want the truth, right?" when he received the nod, he smiled even wider. "Of course you do. So, me and Annie had a deal that she would get me out of here. And now, she's gone. She wouldn't contact me, she just disappeared. And she disappeared without me. SHE LEFT ME HERE! THAT WAS NOT THE DEAL!"
"Alright, why don't you calm down and start talking so we can find her and you'll get your revenge."
"Alright. So, what do you want to know next?"
"Where do you think she might be?"
"Well, she might be in the laboratory, but I doubt that. You should look after her somewhere near graveyards, the cabin of Tobias Hankle's, or maybe Spencer's first house..."
"Why would she be there?"
"Because they bring the memories back. She's sentimental. And she's a woman. She loves the cliche stuff really bad."
"Okay. And the last question is: why should we believe you? You're an enemy, you're a psycho, you're someone we hate the most and, what's the most important, you are the one who destroyed our friend's life."
There was a minute of silence which they both spent staring into each other's eyes. They would keep it going but just then, Setton started laughing.
"What's so funny, Carl?" Rossi asked, clearly disoriented.
"You were supposed to be the best of the bests, Agent!" he laughed. "Isn't it obvious? Of course, I love her. But as her father I have the right to discipline her. And right now, she disobeyed, she left me here, with you. She deserves the punishment. And this will be a nice alternative to our usual way of dealing with things."
"Oh, you got me curious. What is it that you do when she misbehaves?"
"I speak with her. I'm not really into domestic violence."
"But you are into violence..." Rossi asked, confused.
"I am, but I would never hurt my sweet, little daughter. She's my girl. I wouldn't dare to hurt her!" Setton stated.
"Alright, thank you. You're not free to go." Rossi answered and walked out of the interrogation room. "What was that..?" he asked his friends.
"What was what?" Simon asked, not understanding.
"He... He has just shown us emotions... He... he's not emotionless. We might be able to use him even better from now on..." Hotch answered, while his brain was trying to proceed everything that happened in the interrogation room.
Because, eve though everything seemed to be just a boring talk, there was so much body language helping them.
"We might have to build a profile on him. It appears that we don't know him as well as we thought we do..." Aaron added and turned to leave, his team behind him.
A/N: Tam tam taaam! Guys, I've just realized that I called Setton with the name of the very fucking Carl Buford . Oh God, I hate myself for it now... Maybe I will change his name into something that wouldn't remind us of... ugh, I don't even want to write it!
