Bridgette wasn't as nervous for school the next day as she convinced herself she should be. She knew she would be able to handle any of the academics. She really did know that. She thought what she needed to worry about was being accepted by her peers. She was coming into class a few months into the year. In their eyes, she had skipped two grades.
But when had she ever been accepted? People tolerated her and that was all she needed.
She walked into her physics class and went to the teacher's desk. Her new teacher was a woman in her fifties and she had her hair in a messy bun. She had science posters all over the walls and action figures from the TV show Doctor Who on her desk.
"Hi, I'm Bri—"
"Bridgette Shepard," she nodded. "I'm Ms. Dawson."
"Hello," she replied shyly.
"I'm glad you made it," Ms. Dawson said. "I've heard a lot about you and I'm looking forward to what you'll do. We need more strong women in the science field."
Bridgette didn't know what to say but she felt like it was a bad idea to tell Ms. Dawson that she wasn't really a science fan. Instead she just nodded deeply.
"I've made some review worksheets for you to look over. This is what we've done the first part of the year," she explained, handing over a fairly large stack of papers. "I can't afford to slow down but let me know after class if you have any questions or need any help."
"Thank you," Bridgette said quietly. For some reason she wasn't expecting that kind of support. If anything, she expected her new teachers to be harder on her, as if to prove she was worthy of being there. Maybe that kind of treatment was down the line but for the moment she was glad she had an ally.
Bridgette turned around and looked for an open seat. The entire class was staring at her or whispering to their partner. There was only one lab table open and Bridgette sat down there. Her heart sank when a Soc boy sat down next to her. They both looked at each other in disappointment, wondering why they had to be paired together.
Bridgette used the review worksheets more than a few times as Ms. Dawson lectured, adding little notes along the way. But she wasn't completely lost and she knew that going over her new text book would help her. She gathered her things together, ready to head out. Before she got the chance, her new partner stopped her. He looked really uncomfortable, like he was talking to a grenade and he was waiting for it to explode in his face.
"I don't know if you know this, but we have a lab every Friday and we're partners for it," he said. "We work on the lab in class and then have to write and turn in a lab report on Monday. We're supposed to, uh, work on the lab report together."
"What, like outside of school?" Bridgette asked in alarm.
"Yeah," he said slowly. "Unless you want to write up two lab reports and turn one in for me."
"Nice try," she rolled her eyes. "Can't we just work on it at lunch?"
"We all go to Myrtle's on Fridays for lunch," he frowned. Bridgette neither knew nor cared what or who Myrtle's was. "We can do it after school."
"I have soccer."
"Oh. Right."
"What about Monday morning? Before school?"
"I have French club in the mornings."
"Really?" she asked. She didn't know they had clubs in the morning.
"Yes," he said stiffly, as if waiting for her to make fun of him. It was laughable. Why in the world would she laugh at him for being involved in school?
"Well," Bridgette said, stalling for time. There had to be an alternative option. "How long do the reports usually take?"
"Depends on the unit," he shrugged. They started to walk out of the classroom, realizing they only had a few minutes until their next class. "Sometimes ten minutes. Sometimes an hour."
"Can we do it over the phone?" she asked. Tim wouldn't be thrilled by the idea that she was talking to a Soc on the phone, but it beat actually having to hang out with him.
"We could try that," he said uncertainly. He looked at her apprehensively and she knew he had qualms about giving a greaser his phone number. What did he think she was going to do with it? "There are going to be some lab reports where we might need to meet but…"
"We can worry about that when it comes up," she finished. He nodded. "I'm Bridgette."
"I'm Skyler."
Skyler, she thought with a smirk. What a Soc name.
"See you around, I guess," she said.
"Yeah," he said with the same level of enthusiasm that she had shown.
They went their separate ways. She went to her American history class and then made her way to English. Similar to her calculus class, it wasn't just the senior level English. It was the advanced English class. Her English teacher was Mrs. Hollister and she was in her late twenties. She greeted Bridgette with the same amount of support as Ms. Dawson and Bridgette was relieved. She turned around to find a seat when a familiar face caught her eye.
Ponyboy was looking at her in bewilderment. He was sitting on the opposite side of the room as the door, right next to the window. There was a seat open in front of him and Bridgette didn't know if that was because of fate or because Socs tended to avoid sitting by greasers at any cost. She was going to go with fate.
She smiled shyly and walked over to the seat.
"What is going on?" Pony whispered as she sat down. She opened her mouth to reply but Mrs. Hollister cut her off. Bridgette turned around in her seat but she could feel Pony staring at the back of her head. They were starting a new book called Catcher in the Rye. The class time was spent discussing the author, JD Salinger, and the time period in which the book was set. Mrs. Hollister said that it was imperative to know about the author and the environment in which the book was written in order to fully understand a book. Bridgette didn't know if she necessarily agreed with that but she didn't mind. JD Salinger had a pretty interesting life.
She gathered her things and waited for Pony so they could walk to math together.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
"A lot of things are changing," she smiled. "For the better."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm graduating in August," she said simply. She could have afforded to expand on her explanation but that was all he really needed to know.
"You are?"
"I am. I have it all worked out."
"Glory," Pony breathed. "You're serious about getting out of here."
"Of course I am."
"But, I mean, you're really serious. Don't you want to enjoy senior year?"
"I'm going to answer that with another question. Are you enjoying your senior year?"
"Touché," he said slowing and then broke into a grin.
"Besides, this can be my senior year. It's only November."
"Only November," he agreed. "And you're already the soccer captain, ahead in every class, and resolved to not having friends. It's been a busy year."
"It'll be worth it," she said confidently. "Now I just have to wait a few months instead of a year and a half." She paused and then added, "My parents are proud of me."
"They've always been proud of you," he said. Bridgette gave him a look. "I'm serious! How could they not be? They just didn't say anything because they didn't want you to become complacent. But they have always been proud of you. They want something better for you."
"My mom said I might actually end up saving the family. What do you think that means?" she asked.
"I don't know," he shrugged. "But no matter what she means, just remember that it is not your responsibility to save anyone."
"Thank you, master," she giggled.
"I'm serious," he said firmly. "You already do more than anyone else should. I don't want anyone putting any more added pressure onto your shoulders."
"Well, thank you," she said. They entered math class and sat down.
"So what other classes are you taking?"
"I'm also in physics now," she said.
"Physics?" Pony cried. "How smart are you?"
"Pretty smart," she laughed and he smiled. "But get this, my partner is a Soc."
"No," he gasped.
"Yeah. And he said eventually we might have to meet up for a project."
"Did you warn him that Tim would rip his head off or are you just going to let that be a pleasant surprise?"
"I haven't decided yet," she joked. "I'll see how it goes."
"Keep your options open."
"Exactly."
Mr. Schmidt walked into the room and Bridgette pulled out her notebook.
"Hey," Pony said quietly, aware that they would be interrupted soon. "I'm not saying I agree with your vow to not have friends, but I understand why you feel that way. But I wanted to say I'm glad we still get to talk in class."
"Two classes now," she said, not yet processing what it was he was saying.
"Yeah," he said, his smile growing slightly bigger.
Then class began.
It wasn't until she was walking out of James's office after lunch that she really thought about what Pony had said. It wasn't like he had confessed his undying love for her or anything, but he did say he was glad he got to talk to her. And considering Bridgette assumed Pony wanted absolutely nothing to with her for the majority of her life, that was pretty ground breaking. He didn't have to talk to her. She even gave him an out by saying she couldn't have friends. And yet he was sticking around. He was willingly being her friend. That meant a lot to her.
She still was head over heels for the kid. Her entire life she had this fantastical vision of him. She often pictured him standing in a field of flowers or looking out over an ocean, even though there were neither fields of flowers or oceans anywhere near them. He was too good looking and too smart and too kind. She idolized him. She knew it wasn't healthy but she couldn't help it. Since he didn't hang out with her, she had no other option than to assume he was perfect in every way.
Of course, now she did know him and she knew he was definitely not perfect. He was pushy and he didn't always think things through but these human qualities only made her like him more, though she had no idea why. He wasn't some fictionalized version of himself. He was real. And she liked him for it.
Now that she a bigger workload and she was captain of the soccer team, it really was easy to forget about the whole friend option. She finished her homework and when her mom checked her physics homework, asked if it was some kind of joke. Bridgette assured her that it was really science and not gibberish.
Bridgette was doing well in school so far. It had been less than a week, but still.
She walked into physics on Friday feeling a certain dread. So far she had been able to remain civil with Skyler while they sat as far away from each as possible at their table. That day she would be forced to communicate with him. And, even worse, collaborate with him. Gross.
They were discussing thermal physics in class, more notably the subject of specific heat. Before they started on their lab, Ms. Dawson went over the lab rules and guidelines. Bridgette didn't know if it was for her benefit or if it was custom for Ms. Dawson to do it every week. Skyler agreed to grab the supplies they would need while Bridgette drew the outline for their notes.
As they worked, Bridgette decided that physics was a lot of fun. It would have been better if she had a different partner, but it really wasn't that bad. Skyler proved himself to be quite the brain. He took time to ensure accuracy and he was polite when Bridgette took her turn to measure. It wasn't fun working with him but she had to admit—although never out loud—that they made a pretty decent team. He must have thought the same thing as they stared at their finished project ten minutes before the class ended. They finished their notes and decided to try and work on the lab report then and avoid having to interact at all during the weekend.
Pony greeted her with a warm smile when she entered English. They made small talk like usual.
Bridgette's life was as routine as it had ever been. Soccer and school consumed her every waking moment. She had her first soccer game a few weeks into November and she felt the pressure. James came out to support her but what surprised her was Pony had come out to see the game, also. He was with Soda and Bridgette lost focus for a second when she saw them. She couldn't believe it. They were there for her. It was a conceited thought, but she knew they were. They had no other reason to be there. They wound up killing the other team, 5-0.
James reached her first since he was standing on the sidelines with the coach. He praised her for a good couple of minutes and she beamed at him. Then he left and Pony and Soda walked over.
"This is a surprise," she said.
"I had to see you in action," Soda enthused. "Everyone talks about how good you are. You are so good."
"Thanks," she smiled. "It was nice seeing some familiar faces in the crowd for once."
"Well get used to it because this was fun," Soda burst. "I don't think Steve would be too into it, but Two-Bit would definitely come around."
"Steve would come if you made bets out of it," Pony added.
"Well, I know who I'd put my money on every time," Soda said and winked at her. She blushed and looked down.
Soda kept his promise. He was at every single game. Sometimes he had Two-Bit with him, sometimes it was Steve. Pony was at most of the games, only missing them when he had track meets. Since Pony had been so supportive, she tried to make it to a few track meets. It was tough for her because she always had soccer practice but every so often she would say she was going to the bathroom and run to the track instead. Pony always looked happy to see her hiding beneath the bleachers.
So far she had avoided meeting up with Skyler but they did have to talk on the phone a few times. Tim wasn't there the first time it happened which was a relief, but the other times he made sure he would be home. Fortunately for everyone, Skyler and Bridgette were determined to get the conversation over with as soon as possible.
It was about that time where Pony and Bridgette had to prepare for their next math project. This time they were assigned maximum and minimum problems. It was more complex than their first project.
Since Bridgette wasn't supposed to be his partner anymore, she couldn't risk working over at her house and her parents coming home. Therefore, Tim very reluctantly agreed to let her work at Pony's house. She knew he would check in on them but, again, it was progress.
"Pony told me the good news," Darry said the moment she walked through the door. "You're really getting out of here."
"I really am," she said.
He already had a plate of food waiting for her on the table and she smiled down at it fondly. He beckoned for everyone to sit down, including Two-Bit who was eating cake on the couch.
"So what's the plan?" Darry asked.
Bridgette never in a million years would have assumed she had so much in common with Darry. Sometimes she forgot that he wasn't much older than she was when he had to take control of the family. He had a lot going for him, the same way she had a lot going for her. He was going to get out of there. He was going to do amazing things. Bridgette knew he loved his brothers and would do anything for them, but she couldn't help but wonder if Darry was sad he never got his chance to get out. She knew how much it meant to her and she couldn't imagine it all being taken from her in such a horrible way.
She told everyone about her plans for the rest of the year and what school she wanted to go to. Two-Bit hit Pony square in the chest and made Pony choke.
"Isn't that where you wanted to go?" Two-Bit asked.
"I was looking into it," Pony coughed, punching Two-Bit in the arm. "Nothing is final yet."
"But you've already been accepted," Soda added. Soda turned to Bridgette and said, "Ponyboy got into every school he applied to. He's pretty smart, I guess."
"You guess," Pony laughed. "UO is pretty far. I just want to consider all of my options."
"If you end up going there, the both of you will have a built in friend," Darry said. "Someone to lean on and someone to look out for you."
"That doesn't sound so bad," Pony said. He looked up at Bridgette and smiled. She felt a blush creeping up her neck and smiled back.
Darry nagged her to tell him more. She told him all about her newfound desire to be an actuary. Darry told her that was a pretty tough career to get into and it wasn't really easy for anyone, let alone a girl.
"Then I'll just have to prove to everyone I can do it," Bridgette shrugged. Two-Bit cheered loudly and clanked his beer bottle against Bridgette's water glass.
"If anyone can do it, it's you," Pony sighed. "There's nothing you can't do."
"She works hard," Darry said.
"I work hard," Pony defended.
"I know, but you don't work as hard as her," Soda teased.
"No one works as hard as her," Pony chuckled. "Leave me alone. I'm already going to college."
They finished dinner with Darry asking her about soccer. Soda and Two-Bit reenacted one of her games which had everyone in stitches. Soda made a comment that she wasn't as violent as everyone said she was and she admitted sheepishly that coach threatened to take away her captain status if she pulled any of the same antics from the year before. Two-Bit found this hysterical.
Soda and Two-Bit went off to meet Steve. Darry stayed there, though. He didn't hover like Tim always did. Tim came by to check on them and he wound up staying over for awhile to eat some dinner leftovers. Darry kept him occupied so that Bridgette and Pony could work in peace.
Before Tim and Bridgette headed out, Tim turned to Darry.
"Curly gets out soon," he said. "I have some things I need to take care of before he does so I won't be around much. Are you still good to watch them?"
"Of course," Darry said.
Tim nodded in satisfaction. Bridgette thanked the Curtis boys before heading out. Bridgette waited for the lecture about working only for an hour and coming straight home afterwards. Instead Tim surprised her.
"I told Curly about you going to college," Tim said. "I've been meaning to ever since I found out but they have been asses about visitations lately."
"Oh," Bridgette said.
"He's not taking it too well," Tim said slowly. Bridgette looked at him in bewilderment. "Probably the same reason I'm having a hard time with it."
"You're having a hard time with it?" Bridgette asked.
"A little," he shrugged. "I don't like that we won't be there to protect you. I don't like that we spent all this time looking after you and now you're going off to the real world. Way too soon. You'll be around people older than you and it worries me. It worries both of us."
"Tim, you taught me how to take care of myself," Bridgette said softly. "I know what kind of crowds to avoid and I know how important it is to keep up on my studies."
"I know," he sighed. "You're a smart kid. You really are. And I don't just mean with them books." They reached their house but instead of going inside, Tim sat down on the first step of the porch. Bridgette took the seat next to him. "Look, I want to say something to you but it's not easy so I'm only saying it once. Got it?"
"Got it," she agreed quietly.
"I understand that I haven't made life easy for you," he said through clenched teeth. "I know I've been too protective and sometimes too mean. I am sorry about that, okay?"
"Okay."
"It's just that you're the only person in this family that has a real shot at life. You're going to be something. I don't want to protect you from this town for only things like drugs and idiot boys. I want to protect you from everything and I realize it's stupid now. No one can be protected from everything. Not forever."
"You've done a good job of protecting me," Bridgette said softly. She had never heard Tim admit that he was wrong. Ever. Even when he got into fights at school, he never acknowledged the fact that he hurt someone. He just groaned about how he was hit first and then celebrated that he had a few days off from school in the form of a suspension. She knew it wasn't easy for him and she was hanging on his every word. She wanted to remember this. She wanted to remember everything about this. The guilt that flashed across his face, the bitterness that he really couldn't protect her forever.
"I've done a good job of protecting you here," he allowed. "But if I think about it, I haven't really protected you at all."
"What do you mean?"
"You don't really know what out's there. Curly told me awhile back that you don't even think guys are interested in you."
"They aren't," she mumbled, staring at the ground in embarrassment. She was embarrassed that she wasn't appealing the opposite sex, but she was mostly embarrassed that she was talking to Tim about boys.
"That right there is a cause for concern," he said. "Because trust me, boys are definitely interested."
"What?" she asked blankly.
"Why do you think Victor Gutierrez ended up with a black eye?" Tim asked. Bridgette knit her brow in confusion. She heard Tim beat Victor because Victor owed him money. That was what Curly had told her anyway. "I heard him talking about you with some friends. The things he was saying were not…"
Tim trailed off but Bridgette continued to look at him expectantly. What was Victor saying about her?
"Look, I'm not going to get into it. But boys are interested in you and I'm worried you won't know what to do once you reach college. You'll go to parties and make friends and guys are going to be pulling every trick they've got. And most girls have had years of experience learning about boys in high school. They've made their mistakes with drinking and have learned how to handle themselves better. I'm throwing you to the sharks and I really need you to be ready for it. I can't look after you forever no matter how much I want to."
Once again, Bridgette was stunned into silence. She had always known that Tim was so hard on her because he really did care. But it wasn't in his nature to actually voice how much he cared about anyone. She was touched and she appreciated it but she also didn't know how to react. The truth was, he was hard on her. She knew it was coming from a good place but it didn't make it any less hard to handle sometimes. She knew that a major bonus of getting out of that town was not being under Tim's watchful eye all the time. She always imagined herself at parties and being alone with boys. But now she actually took a second to think about that. She wouldn't know what to do with a boy alone. If he tried to kiss her and she didn't want to kiss him, how was she supposed to deal with it? Her first instinct was to punch him but that seemed violent and everyone was always telling her to use her words. What was she supposed to say? She pictured herself at a party, drinking for the first time. She didn't know her limits and was bound to drink too much just like every other college student ever. But unlike most other college students, she wouldn't have experience under her belt.
"Tim," she said cautiously. "You really did teach me how to be a good person with good morals. I'm not going to go crazy once I get into college. One, it's not in my nature, but also because I don't want to. But I really don't know what to expect or what to do. I mean, I've never actually hung out with another person alone before, let alone a boy."
"We need to, like, train you," Tim said thoughtfully. Bridgette bit her tongue but she was getting really sick and tired of being compared to a dog. "I need to let you get some experience while still protecting you. The people in this town are still shit and there's still time for everything to fall apart."
"You could let me hang out alone with people you trust," she suggested. "I know it's a group of guys, but you have to admit the Curtis gang is pretty alright. I haven't gotten into trouble with them so far."
"No," Tim agreed slowly, clearly waiting to see where Bridgette was going with this.
"Ponyboy is my friend," she blurted, feeling this weight lift from her chest. "We get along and I like spending time with him. I don't want to limit all of our time together just to school related things."
She expected Tim to laugh in her face and run into the house at the absurdity of it all. She figured he would want her to take baby steps, such as befriending a nice middle class girl, not a boy greaser. But instead he looked at her thoughtfully, his mouth in a tight line.
"Pony's a good kid," Tim said slowly, more to himself than to Bridgette. "Curly really seems to like and respect him. He doesn't really get into trouble. At least not since that Johnny thing." He looked up at the sky and chewed on the inside of his cheek. Bridgette watched him apprehensively. Then he sighed heavily and shook his head. "He's still a boy, Bridgette."
"He's different," she urged.
"All boys are the same in a lot of ways," Tim said.
"You said yourself I'm going to be seeing a lot of new boys in college. Shouldn't I learn how to be around boys that I trust? He would never try anything with me, Tim. He respects you too much. And he's just not interested. I hate to bring it up, but do you remember my life from the time I was six to about eleven?"
This made Tim smile another actual smile. He looked over at her and ruffled her hair.
"He is a good kid," Tim repeated. "And if he did try anything with you, at least I'd be around to fix that."
"He won't," she insisted.
"Okay, look," Tim said. "You can hang out with him but there are conditions." Bridgette almost missed the next part of his sentence because she was too busy screaming internally. She knew this year would be different! She knew things were changing for the better with Tim. "If he does anything to make you uncomfortable, you tell me. If any other guys come over to the house to hang out outside of his normal gang, you come home immediately. I trust those guys but I do not trust any other guy in town. Don't drink or smoke or any of that shit. Deal?"
"Deal," she said eagerly.
Tim rested a hand on her shoulder and she smiled at him.
"You are a good kid," he told her. "I know you are."
"So are you," she said and he rolled his eyes. She shrugged. He didn't have the cleanest record but she loved him all the same.
He stood up and she rushed to get up.
"Remember the conditions," Tim said before walking inside. Bridgette looked after him with a huge grin on her face. Things were finally, actually looking up for her. She didn't know what to do with herself.
