I took a deep breath and slowly opened my eyes.

I exhaled my breath and looked around me. The walls of the room were dark, yet I could feel the eyes of my spectators watching me.

"Hotaru, due to Kakashi Hatake you have been granted special permission to have a ringed private match to become a chunin. Let it begin." A voice called out who I knew belonged to the Hokage named Tsunade.

I scooted a foot back and angled myself so I was ready. I was ready to try out my new technique, I knew I could do this. I had to do this.

His eyes, a perfect blue, peered into mine gently and his shining golden hair slowly- I had to cut this out, it was no time for day dreaming. I shook my head to clear my mind and looked up at my opponent.

He was standing across from me, with long white spiky hair. He looked older and I felt my stomach lurch slightly out of fear, he looked experienced and strong.

"I will go easy on you kid." He said laughing. "I am only doing this because Kakashi is a friend of mine. You may call me Jiraiya." He then took a deep breath and focused his eyes.

I then closed mine and pulled my left leg in front of me and wrapped it around the others while holding my hands together in a circle above my head. This was my new technique. I had to get it perfect this time.

"Shadow Suffrage jutsu!" I yelled loudly as shadows appeared in the circle encased by my hands. It then started to seep out and surround me.

I can't do it Kakashi Sensei! It is to difficult!" I said falling to my knees. He walked over to me and put a hand on my shoulder and just said, "yes you can. You have darkness inside you, and no matter how unsettling that it you can use it."

I then stood up and concentrated. I had to learn to do this. No matter how much time it took.

I then opened my eyes which had turned black and let my arms race forward, becoming shadows and expanding around Jiraiya. He looked down curiously, obviously not attacking yet so my spectators can see what this does. I then clenched my hands and the shadow tightened around him holding him in his grasp. He then 'poofed' and there was a log in his place, I quickly readjusted my hands to circles and let my feet turn to the shadows, searching for him. All of the shadows in the room, I was them. I could feel them. He was in one, the shadow reached around him, he was hidden in a corner, and he quickly jumped out of it as it all came together to a single dot which would have crushed him. The darkness the expanded again, filling the white it had left behind. He then jumped behind me and quickly knew me in the back.

I fell forward crying out and he put a hand on my stomach catching me. I slumped in his arm.

"Come on now beautiful you can do better than this." He said. His hand on my stomach creeped me out. My whole body turned into a shadow and wrapped around his hand instantly crushing it, leaving the white in the air as it expanded up his arm. He quickly jumped back, but his arm was still held tight. He then reached his foot around and kicked the spot where my hand had reached out of the ground behind him.

I cried out and jumped from the shadows holding my arm. It stung but I could deal with it. I can't maintain my jutsu under pain though.

His arm on the other had was contorted and bleeding.

"You are doing great, now for me to end this though." He said spreading out his legs and bending down.

"Earth style Dark Swamp!" He yelled out and I instantly saw balck form around my feet and felt myself being pulled down. I gasped slightly and then was right in front of him, and before I could react he yelled out,

"Ninja Art; Needle Jutsu!" I saw his hair expand around him and was instantly filled with pain and was knocked backwards after countless strikes against me with those needles.

I tried my jutsu again and as my aches pulsed through my and blood ran down my forehead I couldn't manage it.

"you can fucking do it." A familiar voice ran in my head. I saw Hidan, his dazzling white hair slicked back and his loose lopsided grin slopped onto his face as he stared at me with those bright eyes. "You can do it, don't mae me beat the fucking shit out of you."

I shook my head to get me back to reality and grabbed my sword off of my back. I had been saving it for a last resort, and well this seemed like a last resort. Iquickly cut both of my palms.

"I can do it! I can use this pain to push me forward!" I screamed and smacked my hands together and instantly disappeared. Then I reappeared, but I looked different. I was completely black and my movements looked sketchy as if I was a demented drawing. I then fell down toward Jiraiya, and swung out my sword, which sent a wave of shadows towards him. He quickly jumped back out of danger.

Then the wave of shadows drew in all shadows and sound, leaving your vision filled completely with white. It then exploded and sent the blackness everywhere, the sound rumbled and shook and created an ear shattering crash, and then it just stopped, receded and stopped. I was sitting down on the ground, back to normal panting with my vision still having flashes of white and my ears ringing.

I looked for Jiraiya and I couldn't see him anywhere then a felt a hand on my head and a slight push to the left.

"Technically I could have just killed you there, I think this match is over." Jiraiya then stood up and left.

The match was over. I felt crushed. I lost. I blew my chance and let everyone down. I looked down at my hands sadly. Though I mean, I don't even know what I just did, but it felt amazing.

Then I saw Kakashi walking down towards me.

"I am sorry, I failed you." I whispered softly.

He came up to me and crouched down, with a hand on my shoulder.

"Hotaru you didn't fail, you did it." He said pleasantly. I looked up at him shocked.

"But I lost!"

"We never expected you to win. And Tsunade had to leave but you impressed her, you have a lot of potential. He then handed my a headband and a vest, both in one day. I looked up at him happily.

"Oh thank you Kakashi sensei!" I yelled tackling him. He just laughed.

I situated the headband around my waist and pulled on a half black shirt, with a long trailing split back, and a blue shirt underneath with long black tights. I then walked out of the building I had my match in throwing my clothes that had been ruined during the fight away. I am so glad I brought a spare pair with me.

Once I went outside I saw Kiba standing there with his lg against the wall, and his hands in his pockets slightly slouched forward. During my months here so far I had become pretty good friends with him, even so I was kidn of surprised to see him here.

He then looked over and saw me, a large grin spreading across his face. He bounded over to me quickly.

"Hotaru! How did it go?" He said excitedly.

"I did it!" I said and held my arms to his side with my waist jutted forward slightly so he could see my headband. When I did that he wrapped his hands around my waist and pulled me forward into a hug. He pt one hand on my hip bone to hold me close and the other on the back of my head holding it to his chest. I felt uncomfortable, well not exactly but confused. This didn't feel like a friendly hug, so was it a… Romantic hug? Whatever that meant. I was never one to dabble in stuff like that and never thought I would, and now I feel uncomfortable. Yet these hugs kind of reminded me of Deidara. I felt my head go light and I fell to my knees.

"Are you okay?" He whispered and knelt down.

"Yeah the excitement just wore me out." I said. He then stared at me, and pushed a strand of hair back out of my eyes. His eyes then grew soft and he slowly moved his head slightly closer to mine. I had read enough books to know what was going to happen. I panicked and so I quickly jumped up, which resulted me in hitting my head against his. I yelled out in pain and he laughed rubbing his head.

"Damnit! Fuck! Ow!" I yelled. He then walked over to me and lightly kissed my head where I hit it. When he did my stomach flipped and my breath caught. I wasn't expecting that, or the reaction I was having.

"I, I have to go." I said quickly. Before I could turn he grabbed my hand.

"Wait!" He said. "At least have dinner with me first, as a celebration. I nodded my head and accepted gingerly.

Over my time here Kiba had been spending almost every day with me, he helped my train and even ate dinner with my at night so I wouldn't get lonely. I never thought he liked me like that though. I like Deidara though. I realized that awhile ago. During my time here I regret I hand't moved on those feeling for him before I left, now, I don't know what to hink with Kiba like this. He made my heart flutter, which made me feel guilty, even though I never even got a chance to tell Deidara how I feel.

We sat at dinner and he sat next to me, instead of across from me. He put an arm around me and it radiated heat. It felt nice but was also uncomfortable.

During dinner I tried to act normally, talking where I needed to, and laughing when appropriate though all I had on my mind where these confusing thoughts.

After dinner Kiba walked me out, he had wrapped his hand around mine and the streets where dark. Then he stopped walking and stopped me. I was confused by his movements. Then he looked down. And looked back up at me with a grin on his face. I tried to say something but he just held a finger up to my lips. He then softened his gaze and stared at me gingerly. I could see it in his eyes what he was about to do.

Then I noticed sitting on tha railing next to us was a clay bird. A bird in the style of the man wracking my thoughts. It was one of his birds.

I quickly ran to it, leaving Kiba there surprised. Though he quickly recovered and held his grin. I looked at the bird and it had a note on it. I ripped it off and looked at it.

It read, "I have been watching you. You can return home now." That was all. He knew I would find this and I felt a warmth spread through me. I would be with him again. I Instantly started running towards the village gate. I had my sword and my clothes on my back, that was all I needed, I was going home. Though Kiba caught up with me.

"Home? You are leaving us?" Kiba said his voice cracking slightly.

"I have to. I am sorry but please don't follow me." I wanted to smack myself, that was the best goodbye I could give? I am such a dumbass. I kept running and his footsteps ceased.

I was about an hour out from the village out of the range of scouts, Deidara should be close since he left that bird recently.

As soon as I entered a clearing I felt something tackle me and I fell to the side.

I looked up and saw Kiba there.

"I couldn't let you run any longer. Please don't leave." He whispered.

"I have to go home"

"Please let this be your home, let me be your home. Please don't leave me Hotaru. I- I love you." He said staring down at me. He had his arms on either side of my head as I lay in the grass and he had his legs around me, from tackling me. I just stared at him shocked, he just said he loved me. I felt a range of emotions flush through me.

I felt for an instant that I wanted to be with him that I loved him to, and in that instance he lowered his head and brought his lips to mine. He let his lips graze mine, and then pressed the hard against me kissing me passionantly.

He was like a spark, a nice glow. It felt nice. His kiss was sudden, like an explosion. Then I pushed him off of me and he helped me up. I stared softly at him and he brushed my hair out of my eyes.

"I-I lo-" I started to say and then stopped midsentence.

Instantly all of those feelings for Kiba which felt strong where a tiny coal against this fire of emotions I felt now, I even forgot him standing there next to me. The confusion was cleared instantly and now my many strings of attachment were cut and a single steel cord took its place.

Across the clearing stood Deidara staring at me wide eyed.