A/N : Hey, so I've written a sequel to that one-shot where Miku kill Neru brutally.. Ow. This basically explains Neru's bipolarness and stuff. I don't own the Vocaloids. :D Let's begin!
Hey Len!
I heard you were planning to confess today. Good luck with that.
Well, I'm sure you feel bad about breaking up with me, even though I said it was fine. It is, trust me.
See, I'm afraid that I was using you in the exact same way you used me.
I had this boyfriend, Dell. He and I were both bullies in our previous school, you remember that I'm a transfer student, isn't it?
Well, so one day, I got sick in the hallways, and I was dying of pain. My whole body had spasms of hurt ringing through it, and it was so sudden. Then, I remembered that the previous night was a Prom Night for the seniors, and Dell had taken me there. He had offered me a drink, and I realized that it was probably spiked.
I was vomiting all over the floor, and no one came to help me.
No one came to help me, because nobody liked me.
I had hurt them all, each in a different way.
I had no one to blame but myself..
And Dell.
I hated the feeling of being ignored, being laughed at. Dell was in the crowd surrounding me. He was laughing the hardest.
The feeling of betrayal is probably stronger than jealousy, love or hate combined.
My own boyfriend betrayed me.
I couldn't take the embarrassment, so I had just forced my parents to let me transfer here. I had the horrible reputation as a bully in my previous school. People feared me, despised me.
Here, I could have a fresh start. Away from Shikon High, away from my haters, away from Dell.
And then..
I met you.
You looked almost exactly like Dell.
But, you were blonde, and you had blue eyes. You were happy with that girl, Miku.
She loved you, Len. She still does. That's why I forced you to confess today. I know you love her back, it's that obvious. After all, you did show me the chocolates that she gave you on Valentine's Day. I think I shouldn't have mentioned that on Valentine's Day, friends gave each other chocolates too.
You were blushing as you let me see them. Catberry chocolates. Your absolute favourite.
Miku sure knew what your preferences were, isn't it?
I started to hang out with you more, and you didn't decline. You were my substitute for Dell. I mean, the Dell that I loved. Not the Dell that I was betrayed by. He had changed. Smoking, drugs, all those had changed him. It corrupted him.
They took him away from me.
They changed him, and took him away from me.
They made him hate me.
It was their fault.
But you, you were still innocent, and pure. You were still young and in love.
You were nothing like Dell, I realized. Sure, you had his hairstyle and features, but…
You didn't have his personality.
Ooops. This letter was supposed to be a congratulations, now I've turned it into a rant about my life. Ahaha, I'm like that sometimes. Even my brother Nero agrees.
Ah, yes. Nero.
He's really nice, the only one who accepts me, other than my parents.
I love him with all my heart. He doesn't like that. :D
He introduced me to you.
See, he decided he liked you, because both you and him were blonde. Isn't that adorable of him?
Well, also because he thought you looked like Dell. The Dell who still loved me, the Dell who was nice and sweet, the original Dell.
I'm bringing up unwanted memories. They hurt my heart, and they make me want to cry, but..
I can't deny.
I'm in love with a memory.
The shell of a boy who used to be perfect.
I'm in God-forsaken love with it.
And I don't know how to fix it.
At least you're happy, isn't it? ^^
I mean, you've been ignoring Miku for the past few months now. It's time to just acknowledge your feelings for her. You can't keep denying, you're in love with your best friend since childhood.
Remember that day you broke down?
You broke down and cried, cried for so long.
You told me that you didn't know how to help her.
"She's always helped me out when I needed it, and now I'm ignoring her! What kind of a friend am I?" you wailed, and I guess seeing you broken got me angry at Miku.
I mean, it technically was her fault you cried.
But it was your fault at the same time.
..Now I'm confused.
Once, I saw her hugging your arm lovingly. I got jealous. Not of you, but of the Dell I saw you as. I forgot, I forgot that you were Len. But I slapped her and screamed at her. Once she told me she was his childhood friend, I shut up. I had gone too far.
I saw her sobbing on the ground, and regretted everything.
My memories of being a bully came back. I let my anger get in the way of everything, and now I was becoming the monster I once was, all over again.
It was frightening.
I was frightened. I just.. I just started texting and walked away, hoping no one would notice.
It was humiliating.
I was regretful.
But there was one thing in the world I could never have the courage to do.
Apologise and mean it.
Sure, I did apologise to Miku, but..
I should have been louder.
I should have hugged her, begging for her forgiveness.
She hates me.
She hates me now.
So, I just… I decided to make up for it by being extra nice to her for the rest of my life. It was too late to apologize again by the time I realized what I should have done.
But anyway, you told me that you were using me as a substitute for Miku. I knew it already, though. I knew it since a long time ago.
She looked like me, I looked like her. Except, I was blonde, I had only one ponytail on the side, and she was just prettier.
She was nicer, too. She was just.. perfect for you.
You were both perfect, flawless.
The only thing stopping you two..
Was me.
Miku fell sick today. I'm planning to visit her, and tell her everything. I'll tell her we broke up. I'll tell her that Len loved someone else (her, hehe~).
I'll tell her to get together with you, and I'm sure that you two would be a perfect couple.
She's innocent. She's pure. She's everything I'm not.
And that's what makes her perfect.
You better visit her and confess quickly, too, Len. Now, I need to get, like.. a thousand pages of algebra to Miku's house. Stupid Kiyoteru, giving us hell.
Oh, and I'll be sure to look out for this 'Rin' sister person you keep telling me about. I still don't believe you have a twin sister, but I'll just look around in Miku's room to see if I can find anything on her.
You better confess today or I'll kill you.
With friendship or something,
Neru
