Summary: Everyone has a reason to be the way they are and so does James Potter. What if pieces of his mask start slipping and a certain redhead sees beyond?
Behind The Prankster's Mask
Chapter 9
'No, Filtch doesn't know it's a map. At least, I don't think so, I managed to clear it before he got his hands on it. But I think he suspected something about what it was, otherwise he wouldn't have taken it,' Sirius whispered.
The Marauders were sitting at Gryffindor's table in the Great Hall, they're heads close together and speaking as softly as possible so they wouldn't be overheard. They were trying to assure Sirius the loss of the map wasn't the end of the world, but all felt down by the loss.
'We always could make a new one?' Peter suggested.
'Yes, we could, but by the time it's finished, we'll be leaving Hogwarts,' Remus waved the idea away. 'You'll just have to be extra careful when sneaking around.'
'Or just not go sneaking around at night,' James shrugged and received a glare from Sirius. Remus looked at his friend with a raise eyebrow. 'And in the case of desperate sneaking need, borrow my cloak,' he amended.
'What am I hearing? James Potter giving up sneaking off at night? Are you feeling okay?' Remus inquired.
'Yes, I just don't want to screw this up,' James replied softly, pointing at his badge.
Sirius reached out and touched James's brow. 'No, he doesn't have a fever, so he can't be delirious,' he stated. James retaliated and swatted Sirius's hand away. But the lights in his eyes were dancing with laughter.
'Yeah, well I've come to realize that if they don't give a damn, it doesn't mean that I shouldn't. Who knows, maybe I'll end up changing the world,' James joked.
'Maybe to its destruction,' a voice behind them piped up. So caught up in their conversation, the Marauders hadn't noticed the volume of their voices had gone up, or that Lily and her friends were just walking by them and had just caught the last of what James was saying.
'Lily,' Serena groaned. 'Just leave them alone already.'
'Yeah, Lily, they're not even worth it,' Dorcas pointed out.
Lily opened her mouth to retort, but fell quiet when James got up, towering above her. For a moment his eyes flashed as he looked at her, sending shivers down Lily's spine. The moment was lost when James turned to the table and gathered a few sandwiches in a napkin. After a few steps he stopped though and turned back to his friends.
'Sirius, would you mind getting my bag later as well? It's already packed for today,' he asked.
'Sure, no problem, Prongs. Where are you going though? If I may ask, that is,' Sirius inquired. His tone and words were tentative, as if he expected James to be a ticking time-bomb to go off at the wrong words.
'Out,' James replied simply. 'I don't have to sit here and keep taking this. Someone has to walk away from these arguments sometime. So why not me?' With a shrug and an approving look from Remus, he turned back around and left the Great Hall.
Lily's mouth had dropped wide open and many people who heard the conversation were staring. Never before had Potter back out of verbal combat with Evans before and it shocked them all. It wouldn't be long before the whole school was buzzing with this new piece of gossip. Nothing seemed to travel faster than gossip about the Marauders and the teachers had stopped pretending not to know the latest pieces of gossip years ago.
'Close your mouth, Evans, you might catch a poor fly. Unless of course you intend to have one for breakfast,' Sirius piped. Lily glared at him and stopped off with her friends in tow. Though Serena did take the time to shoot an annoyed look at him. Sirius managed to smile sweetly in return before she left and then he turned to Remus. 'James never felt the need to be the better man before... are you thinking what I'm thinking?'
'He's been trying to impress Lily for years now to no avail...' Remus pondered out loud. 'Maybe he's giving up on ever getting her?'
'Exactly what I was thinking,' Sirius agreed. 'And that's what scares me. How much more disappointments can he endure for he's completely broken?'
'Well, he can't keep hiding behind that mask forever,' Remus reasoned. 'Some day it will crack.'
'But is that a good or a bad thing?' Peter voiced the questioned that had haunted them for several years now.
'One thing is for sure. That mask is cracking and won't hold on much longer. Either he needs to be able to blow off some steam to someone other than the usual people or someone will have to pick up the pieces if it does break,' Sirius opined. 'And I doubt any of us will be able to put him together again. Not completely anyway. He's been leaning on us too long for that.'
-Outside-
James had reached the edge of the Forbidden Forest and quickly looked around if Hagrid was close. When he judged the coast clear of large gamekeepers, he quickly ducked into the forest and kept up a brisk pace until he was far enough to be completely concealed. He slowed his pace to a slow stroll until he found a small meadow. There he settled under his favourite tree and turned his attention to the sandwiches he had brought.
It felt weird, having walked away from a confrontation with Lily. He had relished in their fights. It was the only interaction she would grant him and he clung to every opportunity. But just now as a new fight was presenting itself, he only felt disappointed. He wanted something other than the constant screaming. Maybe have a normal, civil conversation for a change. Lily, though, was not likely to give him the chance and so he had walked away. If he could not have a normal conversation, he didn't want to speak to her at all.
He already knew that he could never keep to that. Next time he would just get involved into a shouting match again. He had already spend one summer telling himself to forget her and had even convinced himself he was over her, only to find himself asking her out the moment he saw her again.
With a sigh he finished his last bite and put the napkin in his pocket to dispose of later. A glance at his watch told him he still had some time before class and he decided to use it to clear his mind. Even though he knew he was alone, he still pulled out his wand and performed Homenum revelio. The spell coming up blank put a small smile on his face and a moment later a tall, proud, strong and beautiful stag stood where James had been.
It tossed its head for a moment and then took off running into the forest in no particular direction. In James's mind not much could top the sensation of being on a broom, especially not when one was in the heat of a good Quidditch match, but this certainly was a close second. He had been doing this since just after they had fist managed to transform. And, though he looked different, it hadn't been long before he had gained the trust of the unicorn herd and at times they would join him. Probably thinking he was running from some kind of danger, but still, how many wizards could claim they ran with unicorns? Certainly not that many.
Fifteen minutes later a windblown James skidded into the classroom at the moment the bell rang announcing class started. He grinned sheepishly at the teacher and dropped down in his seat next to Sirius. For the world he looked like he had just been out flying and that only fueled his grin. It felt great to have a secret no one else knew about.
'Now I, for one, know you were not at the pitch,' Sirius hissed in his ear.
'A picnic is not usually held on a Quidditch pitch,' James grinned back, keeping his voice low. 'Oh and the Bowtruckles send their love.'
'I will get you, my deer friend, after classes. How was I supposed to know they just happened to be living in the exact tree I choose to climb?' Sirius muttered indignantly.
James just sniggered softly and leaned back in his chair to stare at the ceiling while turning his attention to the teacher. He'd write any notes down later in the dorm. Just because he was paying attention in class, didn't mean the whole school needed to know about that.
A/N: Hope you liked the chapter. Sorry for the long wait. I got stuck and didn't know how to continue this for a while. But I got there eventually. Please review, I really like to know what you think of it.
