This Way

DGM

Chapter 9

Edo's Harshness

Allen walked through the ship endlessly. He felt useless in a way. He remained unconscious during the fight here on the ship and out of danger-sort of-while the struggled for their lives. It made him feel terrible. Then when Lenalee came out of that green crystal, she cried, asking if she was still a part of this world. It saddened Allen and made his gut twist and his heart sink. It hurt him to no end. "I hope she is better. She couldn't even walk." Allen said under his breath.

Allen walked out onto the deck and the sun was coming up. The place was deathly quiet. It kinda scared him. The deck was bare, nobody was there. Anita said everyone who didn't get hit by the akuma would come up here soon. All the survivors. Allen was worried to see how many actually survived. He knew it wasn't many.

Earlier Miranda was crying and apologizing about it. Because she couldn't permanently reverse it. She couldn't save the lives of the ones who died. No one blamed her, but it still bothered her. If Allen was in her position, he might feel the same way. Also, Lenalee hasn't been the same. Not to mention the akuma that was with them. The soul looked happy and peaceful. It wasn't distorted like the rest. Bookman said General Cross was known to be the only person capable of converting akuma. Apparently, he used to be a scientist. Imagine that? Who'd a thought?

Allen walked over to the mast and stood there, staring out at the ocean as the waves gently rolled on, tumbling over another. A cool breeze blowing by and waving his hair a little. Allen gripped his left arm and pressed his back against the mast, lowering his head. If only he had activated it then. He could've destroyed the akuma in the skies and no one would've died. No one. He's never been so disappointed in his life. "Allen?"

Allen raised his head and spotted Lavi and Krory. The first two exorcists up here. "Hi guys." Allen mumbled.

Allen let go of his left arm and sighed, but this caused the two exorcists to worry about him. "Is everyone coming now?" Allen asked.

"Yeah, they're all coming up here now." Krory answered.

"I see."

To be hones, Allen wished they weren't coming up. He didn't want to leave anyone behind, but there was nothing more they could do. He heard a door open and Anita came out with the surviving crew members and Mahoja was the last one out. They silently gathered around the people already there and Allen inhaled a heavy breath. Three, plus Mahoja and Anita and himself. When the rest came out, Lenalee froze. "Is this all who survived?"

Anita solemnly nodded. Miranda almost broke down in tears again. "The crew is below deck celebrating. They are living the rest of their lives having fun and doing what they last wish for." Anita said.

Allen examined everyone's sad faces and the air got heavy. He went over to the side of the deck and prepared the row boat and the akuma held it up from the back. "Is everyone ready? We should be leaving. You have to find Cross as soon as possible, right?" Allen said softly.

"Allen. . . ." Lavi whispered, seeing the pain in Allen's eyes.

"Exorcists-sama!"

The exorcists looked around and Allen turned his head halfway around. "The crew?" Bookman asked.

"Good luck exorcists-sama! Go kick some akuma butt and find your friend! We'll be rooting for you the entire way!"

Lenalee smiled and a few tears streamed down her face as the crew members shouted and hooted and hollered. Allen closed his eyes and an unnoticeable smile formed. The exorcists were now more confident and felt a little better, but still weary and depressed. "Okay, everybody, it's time to go. Please get on the boat." Allen said.

Krory, Bookman, and Lavi were the first on. Ky, Maosa, and Chaoji were after them. Allen helped some of them get on to make sure they didn't fall. They weren't as stable as the exorcists. "Okay, Miranda, your turn." Allen said.

Miranda nodded and walked forward. She gulped and Allen put his hand on her arm and side as Lavi grabbed her hand and gently pulled. Allen lifted her a little and put her down in the boat as gently as he could. Mahoja and Anita got on next. Mahoja and Allen helped Anita, of course. That only left Lenalee and Allen. "Lenalee, it's time to go." Allen said, holding out his hand.

She looked at it with sad eyes, but took it his hand and smiled the best she could right now. Allen carefully put her on the tiny boat. Once on, Lenalee turned around and reached her hand out for Allen to grab. At first, he didn't take it. He looked back at the door that led downstairs and Lenalee's stomach knotted. "Allen, you weren't-"

"No, Lenalee. I didn't get hit. Krory saved me before they could harm me." Allen said quietly.

"Then what's wrong? You said it yourself, it's time to go."

Allen grabbed her hand and jumped on. Chomesuke, the akuma, set them on the water and they got a safe distance away, but Miranda didn't deactivate her innocence. She cried and leaned forward, shaking in pain and from the sadness she felt. I can't. . I can't let them die. . . I can't." she repeated.

Allen leaned forward and put his hand on top of hers. She looked at him and he smiled tenderly as he had been for the last few days, but it was much more sympathetic. "It's okay Miranda. Deactivate your innocence. They understood the consequences of their actions on the ship and knowing this, they still came and they still protected you. No one blames you or anyone else here. It's okay to let it go. Let them die the way they want to. Let them die in with honor. It's the best thing you could ever do for them." Allen squeezed her hand and his own eyes watered, but no tears fell. "We all understand. Please, release it."

Miranda's broadened, but his words made her feel content and comforted her. With another tight squeeze, Allen closed his eyes and then opened them with softened eyes. "Please, Miranda."

Miranda dipped her head and deactivated her innocence. Everyone's injuries returned and Miranda weakened. Ky helped to keep her sitting up and then Allen let go of her hand. "Thank you."

Allen almost fell over and his head ached. His vision was hazy and he nearly fell over, his body feeling weak like before. Lavi quickly grabbed him before he fell head first on the wooden planks that built the boat. "Are you okay, Allen?" Miranda asked worriedly.

"I'm fine. My head hurts, that's all." Allen uttered, holding his head.

"That's right, the akuma hit your head. You might fall unconscious again." Lenalee said, remembering the time the level 3 hurt Allen.

Bookman examined Allen's head and made sure there wasn't any serious wounds on it. Only a few bumps. "The goods news is that there are no cuts, but your head will hurt for awhile. You should rest until we arrive, Allen. Otherwise you'll strain yourself and it might cause more pain." Bookman said, but he went through some of h is pockets and pulled out a small bottle with few pills left inside. "In the meantime, take this."

Allen looked at the pills as Bookman tried handing them to him. "What are they?"

"Pain medicine. You should take it. It will help." Bookman said.

"But what about you guys?"

"There isn't enough for all of us and it won't help us that much because our pain comes from wounds and cuts. You have none. It will be of more use to you than any of us right now." Bookman told him.

Allen took the pills and thanked him, but still felt guilty about it. After that, he fell asleep and woke up right before they arrived at Japan. He felt much better and his head barely hurt. They all got off the tiny boat and Chomesuke shifted into her human form while everyone was still getting on the dock. "Are you feeling better Allen?" Lenalee asked.

"Very much so." Allen answered.

When they all turned around, Lavi was examining a woman dressed in a pink kimono. Allen already knew who it was, but Lavi and Krory-a few others going unnamed- didn't. "Who are you?" Lavi asked.

"You mean you don't recognize me?" she asked.

Lavi thought about it for a minute then the image of the akuma popped into mind then the woman. "You mean to tell me. . . You're Chomesuke?" Lavi asked.

"That's right."

Lavi's eyes popped out in heart shapes and then he shook his head. He couldn't, she was an akuma. He couldn't like her like that. "But you're really cute!" Lavi gave her a thumbs up.

Bookman kicked him and he flew off the dock and in the sand. He spit the sand out of his mouth and yelled at Bookman, but then Allen shhed him. "What?"

When Lavi noticed Allen's eye activated on it's own, he had a good guess why he wanted him to be quiet. "There's akuma all over this place. From what I can tell, I'd say most of them are level 3's." Allen whispered.

"That's why Cross wanted you all to turn back. More than 90% of Japan are akuma. It's nearly impossible to evade them. It's the survival of the fittest here. Akuma feed on one another and the stronger one lives while the weaker one gets eaten." Chomesuke said.

"There's four akuma up those stairs right now. A level two and the rest are 3's." Allen whispered.

"A level 2? Kawamura!" Chomesuke ran up the stairs having said that.

"Chomesuke!" Lavi shouted.

"Stay here." Allen said and ran after her.

"Allen!" Lenalee shouted and tried to go after him, but fell down. Her legs still weren't working.

Allen grabbed Chomesuke and pushed her off to the side right before the the level 3's showed up in front of Kawamura. He accidentally wound up on top of her, pinning her down. He turned his head to look at the akuma, disregarding this fact. Allen's nose scrunched and his face got pale. He looked like he was going to be sick. "Are you okay?" Chomesuke asked.

Allen didn't answer until the akuma were gone. "Yes, I'll be fine. I didn't ram into you that hard, did I?" He asked, getting off her and helping her up. "I'm sorry if I did. I tried to be as gentle as I could."

"No, I feel alright, but Kawamura. . . . "

"Your friend is gone. So is her soul." Allen mumbled.

Chomesuke was surprised to see Allen's face so solemn. She didn't think anyone cared about akuma. It was hard to tell if the exorcists did, but this boy showed so much emotion and feelings towards them. Strong feelings. Chomesuke left it at that. She wouldn't ask why. "We should get the others and head to Edo, quick." Allen said.

"Right."

Allen and Chomesuke cautiously walked back to the others at the dock. When they saw those two, they were more than relieved. "Before they come back, we should leave here." Chomesuke said.

"I agree." Bookman responded. "But Lenalee, she still can't walk."

Allen looked at her. Someone had to carry her. The members from the ship's crew offered to carry her, but she would always decline. "I don't want to burden anyone." She kept saying.

Allen kneeled down and front of her and she bit her lip. Lenalee understood what he wanted without him saying a word. "Allen, I can't."

"Yes, you can. I am a supporter of the Black Order and it is my duty to help exorcists in any way possible. If any other exorcist were to carry you around here then it would be hard for them to fight and we may all be killed. I don't doubt them or anybody else here, but I am faster than them. You won't be a burden, Lenalee. Don't forget, from here on, whatever happens, we're all in this together." Allen told her.

Lenalee was left speechless. He had a solid point. There was no point in her arguing with him. Lenalee would lose every time. So she let Allen put her on his back and latched her arms around his neck to keep herself from falling.

Allen would help guide everyone with Chomesuke. He helped to keep them all from interacting with any akuma they came across. It took some time, but they eventually made it to the path Chomesuke said was safest. "Your son is truly something, Anita." Bookman said, eyeing Allen, who was walking ahead of the group even with Lenalee on his back.

"I agree." Krory added.

"I couldn't be more proud." Anita told them. "He is always trying to help. To not even try would make him feel terrible. He likes having the feeling he has done something to help people. That's why I worry about him sometimes."

"What do you mean?" Lavi asked.

"Allen has a hard time expressing what he feels. If something is bothering him or if he feels sad, he probably won't say anything. He'll smile and say everything is alright. I'm worried one day everything he has hidden from us will break him. What scares me, though, is that I'm never really sure if he is hiding something or not. He is just that good at masking his feelings. He probably doesn't feel all too great about what recently happened with the ship. Allen might even be blaming himself and no one could tell." Anita said, sighing.

Allen didn't hear what she said, but Lenalee had paid full attention. She spent most of the time staring at Allen and blushing about what was going on-her being on his back. However, Anita's words changed all that. She was concerned about him. "Allen, do you feel alright?" Lenalee murmured her question.

Allen looked at her from the corner of his eyes. His lips formed a firm line and his eyes hardened. "You're not blaming yourself about the ship, are you?" Lenalee pursued.

"I don't blame myself, but I wish I could've done something."

"You did do something. You warned us about them. If you hadn't, we all might have died."

"I know. . . . I'll miss them, but I'm glad my Mother and Mahoja are safe. If something would've happened to them, then I don't know what I would have done then. They're the only family I have." Allen said, the pain in his voice.

"Allen. . . . .It must've been hard for you, to tell Miranda to let go."

Allen didn't respond to that. He didn't even nod. "We all feel the same. Sad, scared, beaten, defeated, but this isn't over yet. Once someone is dead, you can never bring them back without facing the consequences. If Miranda kept going on like that, she could have died herself. I didn't want to see her hurt herself anymore than the next person. The crew knew they were good as dead and they accepted that. So we have to accept it. Even though it hurts."

"Allen, you're a great person, but you should care more about yourself." Lenalee told him.

"I do care about myself. It's just, through these hard times, crying won't help the other people around you. Not in a situation like this. If we all let our emotions get to us, we won't feel any better the next day. That's why we must see it through to the end before we. . . . . If I were to cry, it will be awhile before I'll feel any better. So if I have to hold it back until the end, I will." Allen explained, his eyes sincere.

"You're strong, Allen."

"You think so?"

"I know so."

Allen laughed lightly and it had to be contagious, because Lenalee found herself laughing along with him. The others were looking at them, but soon they smiled. It was like all their sorrow washed away. Allen had that kind of effect on people. "They seem to be feeling better." Mahoja noted.

"That's true. It's at times like these when we need a good laugh." Anita replied.

Chomesuke covered her mouth and giggled. "Hey, what's so funny you two?" Lavi asked, running up beside them.

"Nothing much." Allen told him flatly.

"It doesn't look like nothing. It doesn't sound like nothing."

"But it is nothing." Allen retorted and it wasn't exactly lying either.

"It can't be nothing. You were just laughing. It had to be something." Lavi said, annoyed.

"You know, you're a bit loud." Allen said bluntly.

Allen stopped suddenly before Lavi could respond. "We're trapped."

"What?" Miranda asked, confused.

Before Allen could answer her, a level 3 appeared in front of them, then one behind them, and another to the right. Allen held Lenalee tighter. If they ran there was no way hey could loose all of them, but could they defeat them? Allen brought his left hand to his mouth and bit the tip of his glove. Lenalee looked at him and wondered what he was planning. Anita glanced at Allen and understood what he was going to do. "Allen, what are you doing?" Lenalee asked.

The purple one looked at him and grinned wickedly. "Oh, you plan to fight us, eh? You're just a normal human though. You won't be as fun." He laughed.

"Maosa, take Lenalee." Allen ordered.

Maosa nodded and took Lenalee. "Allen, you can't be serious!" Lenalee shouted.

Allen narrowed his eyes. He looked around the area and smiled. The trees and crowded area was his advantage over anybody else. He ran forward, jumped, and kicked the akuma in the face. The akuma was thrown back a great distance and rolled on the ground until he dug his hand in the ground, stopping himself. "Ooooh, you can fight."

The exorcists were amazed. How did he do that so easily? "I forgot to mention something to you guys. While Cross came and went, he would teach me a few things about fighting. He added to my knowledge of what I already knew and helped me improve my skills." Allen said, still biting his glove.

"Cross? As in Cross Marian?" the akuma asked. "Well then, I might have fun with you."

Allen stared at his soul and took a deep breath. Then out of nowhere, the akuma got up and was about to attack Allen, but froze. His fist about four centimeters away from Allen's fist. Even still, Allen looked at him with hard eyes and confidence. He didn't seem fazed at all, he didn't even react. "Why'd you stop?" Allen asked.

"Why didn't you move? You predicted it, I can tell."

"If I would have moved, I would have ran into one of you buddies hiding on the sides or run into my friends."

"It seems you an detect us. How is that?"

"For an akuma, you ask a lot of questions." Allen let go of his glove. He wasn't going to need it. "You stopped. A normal akuma wouldn't."

"You're interesting."

"Don't mock me."

"I'm not really mocking you."

The akuma grinned. "Let's go."

The other akuma didn't seem too happy. "What!"

"We're leaving. We'll let them live, but it won't be long. They'll die soon. They're heading to Edo. There is no way they'll live." he said and left.

The other two grudgingly followed. Allen watched them leave and made sure they were gone before he turned around. Before anyone said anyone said anything, Chomesuke's head lighted up with a bright purple star. She held her head and chanted something under her breath, almost ready to cry. Akuma flew above them. Lots and lots of akuma. Allen's eyes throbbed and he held it with his hand, falling to his knees in pain. "Chomesuke, Allen!"

Allen covered his eye and hissed. Ky put his hand on Allen's back and knelt beside him. "Hey, Allen, is everything alright?"

Allen nodded. He stood up, but when he dropped his hand, blood flowed from his eye and his glove was covered in blood. "Allen, your eye." Anita stressed, reaching her hand out.

Allen lightly pushed it away. "I'll be fine. I'm more worried about Chomesuke right now."

Chomesuke was shaking. "The Earl is ordering all akuma to go to Edo. . . . He's in Edo with our masters. . . . They're in Edo."

"I was afraid of that." Allen said under his breath.

"The Earl is in Edo?" Lenalee whispered.

"We still have a chance to turn back if you like. It's up to all of you." Bookman said.

"No, no matter what stands in our way, we'll continue. We must go on." Lenalee said, shaking her head and everyone soon agreed.

"Then it's settled."

They were getting closer and closer to Edo. Allen wasn't carrying Lenalee anymore, but she could walk on her own feet. So that was good. She just wasn't as fast as the rest, but Allen matched her pace. They went from the front of the group, to the back. "You should go on ahead." Lenalee told him.

"No, I'm staying with you. In your state, you couldn't fight. I'd like it better if you had someone with you to protect you until your get your strength back." Allen replied.

Lenalee stared at Allen's face. It was serious, but still gentle towards her. Her eyes fell on his hands. One hand with a glove and stained with blood. The other dirty covered in dirt. "Allen, you were about to take your glove off earlier when the akuma came. Why?"

Allen seemed to tense for a second, but he was just as fast to calm himself down. He stopped dead in his tracks and looked at her. He couldn't hide it forever. "Lenalee, I need to tell you something very important." Allen said quietly and she could barely hear him.

Allen hesitated, but he had to tell her. He was going to fight eventually. He knew he would have to. Calmly, but very slowly, Allen slipped the glove off his hand and showed it to her. The crystal glowing on his hand shined brightly then it dulled down. It remained glowing through the reflection of Lenalee's eyes. She studied his hand. Red, scaly, and black nails. The skin wasn't as smooth as his other hand either. "Is that. . . ?"

"Innocence, at least, I'm certain it is, but it's transformed many times and I have been able to easily destroy akuma. I've never come across a level 3, but I was more than willing to fight it. I'm an exorcist, but I've been silently getting rid of the akuma in China. So many come in and out where I live. I'm guessing it's because of Japan. It's the first city they would hit before going anywhere else." Allen said.

Now Lenalee understood why he felt so guilty about the ship. He could've done something. He might've been able to even prevent the akuma in the sky from killing anyone. "I was planning on fighting on the ship, but I felt paralyzed the moment I saw the level 3. This is also why Cross came to my home often. It wasn't always for my Mother. Cross would train me and make me stronger. He told me little about the Black Order. Most of what I know is about akuma and how to destroy them." Allen added.

Lenalee stared in awe at his hand. She ultimately knew the skin texture was the same up and down his arm, but it didn't bother her at all. Allen was an exorcist. This sweet kid, a year younger than her, was an exorcist. At the same time Lenalee was happy, excited, extremely enthralled. Allen could go to the Order with them. He could fight alongside him, but that's also what made her unhappy. Allen would have to fight. Could someone as sweet as him do it and not change in the slightest? Lenalee hoped so. She didn't want him to change. "When we get to Edo, Lenalee, I'm going to fight. I'm going to make sure those who can't fight will be safe and I'm going to help you." Allen said.