Kate allowed him to lead their exploration through the abandoned remains of the zoo grounds. She also allowed him to hold her hand, but he tried not to look so thrilled about it for her sake. They had just emerged from a decaying underground exhibit that was covered in graffiti and had paused to examine a rusting cage that once held a gorilla when Kate froze beside him, her whole body going stiff. Castle glanced to her in concern, saw her eyes were darting wildly around the open expanse of the park. He tried to follow her traveling gaze, but failed to determine what it was that could have her so on edge.
"Kate?"
Her eyes jerked back to him, feral and dark like one of the wild animals that had once roamed these ruins, and for a second, he was actually intimidated by her. But he still used his grip on her hand to will her closer, coil his arm around her back.
She allowed that too, even wrapping her own arm around his waist as she encouraged him towards the rock wall of the picnic area, where their date had begun a few hours earlier, but she still looked spooked.
"Hey," he said, catching her chin in his fingers. "What's wrong?"
She scanned the area one last time before she dropped her forehead to his shoulder, rested there for a handful of seconds before taking a step back, scraping her fingers through her hair.
"It's nothing," she murmured, swallowing hard because something had definitely rattled her.
"What was your job, the one you mentioned before?"
He was trying to take her mind off of whatever had unnerved her, but he also had an idea about the random startle, about what could have potentially caused it.
"I was a detective," she sighed, still not meeting his imploring gaze, walking in slow circles on the sidewalk instead. "NYPD."
Post traumatic stress then, maybe? He had done research on that once or twice, knew some of the symptoms. Perhaps she had seen something that triggered a memory, or maybe the cloudy weather overhead matched the day of some traumatic event she kept locked away in her mind. He frowned at the sky; figures it would actually rain in sunny Los Angeles during his date with her.
"Have you ever-"
"Stop trying to analyze me, I'm not a fucking book character," she spat, marching forward to snatch the empty picnic basket he had left on the table and storming away from him.
A raindrop hit his cheek. Their date was obviously over anyway.
Castle hurried after her, but her strides were long, covering ground twice as quickly as he was, and he resorted to jogging to keep up with her because she had the keys to the rental car and he didn't doubt she would ditch him.
"I wasn't analyzing you," he insisted when they reached the car.
She tossed the picnic basket in the back, slid into the front seat without even a glance in his direction and started the engine. He sprinted around to the passenger door before she could lock him out.
"I wasn't analyzing you," he repeated, but she kept her fiery gold eyes on the fat drops of rain hitting the windshield. "I was just trying to figure out what freaked you out back there."
She huffed. "I told you, it was nothing."
"Liar."
That earned him a look, a very menacing look, but he didn't waver, tilting his head, inviting her to elaborate with truth for once.
"I just had a feeling," she mumbled, picking at the denim of her jeans. "Like when you're being watched, you know? That's all."
He believed her. He also believed there was more to it than that, but he wasn't going to attempt to draw it out of her right now.
Castle covered the hand on her thigh, tangled their fingers.
"So, you were a detective," he mused. "That's hot."
She laughed, a melodious, unexpected sound, and then she leaned over, cupped his face in her palms and planted a chaste kiss on his lips that made his insides tingle. When she pulled away, the smile lacing her lips stole his breath. It wasn't seductive, nor teasing, but… happy, she looked happy.
It felt like a swift kick to his gut as he realized he wanted nothing more than to continue making her smile like that for a long time.
They grabbed dinner from a burger joint's drive through, shared fries and milkshakes in the front seat of her rental car, and she was almost surprised by how much he seemed to enjoy himself. Even after her small episode in the park, the light in his eyes still burned bright every time he looked at her.
Kate was sure they had been followed in the park, spied on, watched, and not just by random passerby. It was her job to know if she was being tailed, and she had been struck with the distinct feeling that she definitely was while in Griffith Park with him. What if she was taking too long to finish the job and Gina had become impatient, hired someone new? A visceral wave of protectiveness surged within her at the thought, just as it had in the park.
She wasn't willing to allow harm to befall Richard Castle, because she was attached, because she cared, and those were the worst possible rules of her job that she could break. How had she let things spiral out of her control so quickly?
The relief when they finally made it to his room that night was a welcome balm to her overworked nerves, but she knew she should have returned to her own suite, not his. She was only continuing to complicate her situation, her assignment. He was supposed to be an assignment.
They were slightly drenched from the short walk from her car to the hotel lobby, the rain still drizzling outside, and Castle seemed to relish in the sight of her black bra through the soaked fabric of her white t-shirt, skimming the underside of her breast through the wet material as soon as the front door locked behind them.
"When do you leave?" he murmured, eyes flickering up from her chest.
She breathed past the rush of sensation his touch evoked. "Tomorrow."
"Do you still live in New York?"
Oh… oh no. He was thinking that they could… He wanted more.
"No," she lied, but it was partially true. She had an apartment in New York, but she didn't live there full time.
She had expected a crestfallen expression at the answer, but he was undeterred, still hopeful.
"Where then?"
"Rick," she sighed, shaking her head and curling her fingers in the damp fabric of his blue shirt. "Why does it matter?"
He narrowed his gaze on her, crowded her back against the door. "You know why."
"I'm not looking for a relationship."
"Neither was I."
"Castle, I-"
His phone cut her off and she had never been so grateful for an interruption. Castle felt differently as he groaned and retrieved the ringing device from his front pocket, but his face still brightened at the name on the screen.
"Hey Pumpkin."
He moved away from her, strolling towards the bedroom with a soft smile on his lips. Kate ghosted her hand over the silver handle of the door she was still leaning against, contemplated slipping out. It was the perfect opportunity, she definitely needed to stop playing with the fire that was Richard Castle, but despite the logic, the reasoning, the screaming of her brain to open the goddamn door, her fingers remained hovering over the handle, never pushing down.
"I'll see you in the morning," she could hear him saying, his voice drifting closer once more, and the chance was gone. She dropped her hand to her side. "Yep, around lunchtime. Maybe I'll pick you up and we can grab a bite together."
God, he had a daughter. Gina had never fucking mentioned this. Not in person, not on paper, not once.
"Hey, you okay?"
She glanced up to see Castle watching her, the call with his daughter ended and the device now facedown in his hand.
"Yeah," she answered, pushing off the door and joining him in the living room.
He slipped his hand under her shirt, warm fingers dusting along the bottom of her spine, along the edge of her jeans. "I think Alexis would like you."
She diverted her eyes, trained them on his Adam's apple. "Your daughter."
"My daughter," he confirmed with a nod, pride in his voice, and the familiar sensation of ice water drenching her guts made her feel sick. She knew he had a child after witnessing him speak to her earlier that same morning, but he hadn't brought her up throughout their day – her fault for voiding personal topics – and she had been unfairly glad, because knowing he had a daughter made what she had to do so much worse.
"Kate?"
"You know I won't meet her. I can't."
"You could if you wanted to."
"I won't."
"Why not?"
"Because that isn't how this works, Rick," she sighed in exasperation, a sharp headache already building between her eyebrows. "Today was great, but you leave tomorrow and that's it for you and me."
"But it doesn't have to be, you know that."
He stole the protest from her lips, slipped his tongue inside her mouth, made her momentarily forget why she was fighting against him. She grunted and kept him away with her hands at his chest when she tore her mouth from his.
She had been hired to kill him.
His hand curled around her nape, attempted to coax her back to him, but she turned her head, focused on the carpet.
"You like me, Kate," he murmured against her temple, having the audacity to tease her while the anguish devoured her from the inside out. "And I think you've missed me over the years, just like I've missed you."
His lips caressing the underside of her jaw eased the ache rippling through her bones, and her body yearned to be lost in him again, to forget for a while. One of his hands slithered around, brushed her side with his knuckles before his palm flattened against her abdomen. Her spine curved for him, like a puppet on strings, and she tried to fight the pull, tried to ignore the liquid fire splashing her stomach.
His hand ventured a few inches further, teased at the waist of her jeans, thumb circling the button, and her hips canted into him without permission.
"Tell me you missed me, Kate."
"I hate you," she growled, attempting to catch his wrist, but his fingers remained clutched around her jeans while his other hand became ensnared in the tangled mass of her damp hair.
He tilted her face upwards and she went for his mouth, but he lifted his chin out of her reach and she cursed him, cursed herself.
"This doesn't feel like the end for you and me," he mused, toying with the band of purple cotton beneath her pants. "We have so much left."
He was attempting to convince her and it wouldn't work, but her resistance did not change the fact the she wanted everything he could offer. She wanted more with him too, more than hotel rooms and a spontaneous date in a popular park, but she wouldn't have it. And even if she could, even if they had met under completely different circumstances, she would still destroy him and he deserved better than that.
Her hands flew to his face, cradling his jaw as she rose on the balls of her feet to kiss him.
"Missed me," he smirked through the onslaught of her mouth. "Definitely missed me."
She rolled her eyes, lashes fluttering against his cheeks, but listed into him when his arms came around her back, pressed her as close as possible. She would enjoy her last few hours with him, she would allow herself that much.
"Castle, just - shut up and keep kissing me."
