I hate to sound like a broken record, but I have to thank everyone for adding this story to your favorites and alerts. It means so much to me. I would love to get more review, though. It means a lot to me know what you think...good or bad, questions or ideas you might have. As always, Butterflybetty...you are the greatest!

Five days till Eclispe! giggle

Now there was a questions as to which siblings belong to which family so here is a breakdown:

Swan Family: Charlie, Renee, Emmett, Jasper and Bella

Cullen Family: Carlisle, Emse, Edward and Alice

Rose Swan - married to Emmett (no blood relation to either family)

I hope this clears up any confusion there might have been. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. I just use the characters to tell my story.

Coming Home

Chapter Nine

EPOV

"For the fiftieth time, Absolutely, not!"

"Edward Anthony! Don't you dare raise your voice to me like that…and watch your tone." Mom says in a stern but firm voice.

I look Mom square in the eyes and then I lower my head in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry, Mom. I don't mean to be disrespectful, but I feel very strongly about this. I don't want to have a memorial service. She's not gone. She will come home. I truly believe that. I will not give up so easily on her. I can't believe that everyone else has already." I look over at my Mom and turn around and face the window looking outside at the backyard.

"Edward, please? Be reasonable. The crews have been at the site for 3 days now. They haven't found….anyone that has survived. "

"I can't and won't believe that she's…..unless they can …show me her body. Until that time, I don't want to talk about it."

"Sweetheart, what about the kids? They need some sort of closure."

I hate remembering the moment after that dreadful conversation with Captain Newton.

I didn't have to tell them about their mother. They had overheard the whole telephone conversation through the house intercom system

When I had walked out of my office after that horrifying conversation, I found the kids being comforted by my family. Camryn in Mom's arms, Alice was consoling Matthew and my Dad had EJ in a hug. EJ was the only one of my children who wasn't sobbing.

Once Camryn realized I was in the room, she looked at me and ran into my arms.

"Oh, Daddddddy. What are we going to do? I want my Mmmmoooooommmmmyyyyyy!"

All I could do was run my hands through her hair, and rock her.

"SSSSShhhhhhhh. It will be okay. I promise. It will be okay."

Matthew lifted his head off and looked at me. His eyes and nose were red and swollen. His heart was broken and I had no idea how I was going to fix it. The only thing that could would be his mother walking in that front door.

I look back at my mother and stare at her for a moment.

"I understand what you are trying to do and why you are doing it, but I don't want the kids involved in your plans. I don't want them giving up hope because their mother will be coming home."

"WHAT? What did you just say?" Rose asks as she walks into the room. My Mom turns to look at me as if saying, 'Go ahead.'

Rose has been out of the hospital for a couple of days now. Emmett, Rose and her doctor have agreed that Rose can be over here only a couple of hours a day due to the emotional stress. She has to rest the rest of the day, at home. It was the only agreement they all could reach because Emmett knows it is unrealistic to think he can keep her away. She can be very hard headed.

"Did you just say that Bella is coming home?"

"Rose…."

"Don't Rose, me. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I can't even fathom what I would do if it were…..Emmett, but, Edward, you need to accept that…..she's…that she won't…." Rose tries to finish the sentence but she is unable to. Tears are siding down her cheeks.

"Rose, I truly believe in my heart and soul that she's okay. I can't describe it. If I was ever sure about one thing in my life is that she is still alive and that she will be coming home. I will not give up on her. I can't and won't do that to her."

Rose and my Mom just stand looking at me in total confusion.

"Edward, you need to get some grip on reality. You have to for the kids' sake. They have to be able to mourn to be able to move on. I know that it isn't something that is going to happen overnight, but you have to accept it. We all do." She pauses. Rose drops her head and whispers just loud enough to hear, "Bella isn't coming home. Bella ….. Bella is dead." She seems to say this as though she is admitting it to herself as well as to convince me.

"NO! I will not accept that. I don't understand this. How can you all give up hope on her so easily? How? Why do you give up so easily?" I just stare at the two women in front of me for a moment, and then turn around walk out the back door to the deck.

I go and sit on the lounge chair and stare into the trees. It is dark out and every once in a while you can see a light glow in between the foliage and the trees. I can see her sitting back here as she did all the time and watching the lightning bugs dance in the dark. The smile on her face lit up the dark. It is the little things in life that make Bella smile. She doesn't need anything big, fancy or expensive. 'Plain Jane' is watch she calls herself. She is anything, but plain.

"Hey, son."

I didn't even hear Charlie come out of the house. He walks over to the chair next to me and sits down.

"Hey." I answer.

"I heard it got a little intense in there a bit ago. You want to talk about it?"

I look down at my hands. How do I try to explain without him thinking I'm crazy?

"You know, I've never seen two people more emotionally connected as you and my little girl. Even when you were children, you both couldn't be without each other. When one of you was hurt, the other one seemed to experience it, too."

"Charlie, I can't try to explain it. I understand how everything looks. I know what they've said. I hear it….I just….can't accept it. Every fiber in my being tells me she's alive. Alive. How do I ignore that? I know that everyone thinks I am in denial. If it wasn't such a strong feeling, I would think I was crazy, myself. I don't know. Maybe I've been hanging around Alice too much. Her and her 'feelings.' I don't know. I just…can't explain it. "

I look over to Charlie and he's just nodding his head. He doesn't say anything. He's just listening.

"Now my Mom wants to have this memorial service. I can't do it. If I do this service, it goes against what I believe…..that I am giving up. I can't do that. I don't know what to do. I can barely function any more. And the kids. I don't know what to do for them. I'm lost."

We sat there quietly for a few minutes and then Charlie says, "Edward, I can't tell you what to feel. I can't tell you what to believe. It's been almost a week now. You've had a lot to process…emotionally, but you have to understand. Some people can't understand the connection you and Bella share. It isn't something that happens to everyone. Some people are analytical and just go with the facts. This is just part of the nature, but the facts are the plane went down. No one has been found alive. The area the debris has scattered is enormous. What are the chances they will find every one and every piece of the plane? Unlikely. Now, do I think that you should give up hope? Absolutely, not."

I sigh.

"I will try to talk to Esme about holding off on a memorial service for a while. I don't think Renee could go through it, right now, anyways. I do want you to think about some people needing closure before they can try to heal and move on. Not in moving on and forgetting Bella, but just being able to get out of bed the next morning and taking each day as it comes. This is what you must do. Take each day one by one. The service would be comforting to others and doesn't mean that you have to give up hope. It is something to think about though. You don't have to make any decisions right now."

"Thanks, Charlie."

Charlie gets out of the seat, pats me on the back and walks back inside.

He gave me a lot to think about. This isn't just about me. I haven't thought past myself and the kids as to how everyone else was handling the situation. I've been in my own emotional bubble. Maybe Mom and the others needed it. Charlie was right. Just because we had the service, doesn't mean I have to give up hope. It might help the kids, too.

I get up and walk back into the house. My Mom is sitting on the couch. The bags and dark circles under her eyes speak volumes. She has been so busy trying to help me with the kids that she hasn't been taking very good care of herself. I haven't had to ask her for any help. She's been here since Day One and the one thing that she asks of me and how do I respond? With anger.

As I enter the room she comes over and hugs me. After a moment or so, I pull away and she says, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push the service on you. I didn't stop and think you might not even want one. I spoke with Charlie. We don't have to decide anything right now. There is no hurry. I just would like for you to think about it."

"Mom, I am sorry, too. I spoke with Charlie and he gave me a lot to think about. I want you to go ahead and plan a service for …. Bella. I am not saying that I have accepted that she's gone and that I am giving up hope, but a service might help everyone with their feelings. For some…it might be goodbye. Others, it might be just remembering the good times."

My Mom stares at me with disbelief….shell-shocked at what she is hearing….especially after the countless arguments I've had with her about the service over that last couple of days.

"Are you sure, sweetheart? I don't want to do anything against your wishes."

"No, Mom. I'm sure. I would appreciate it if you waited a week or so. I don't think Renee can handle too much more...especially with everything she has gone through with Rose being in the hospital and all."

"Absolutely, I can do that. I will wait a few days before bringing the subject up, again, especially to Renee. Edward, I know this is extremely difficult on you, but…thank you." I runs down her cheek. "I love you, son."

"I love you, too. I do have one more thing that I would like for you to do, though."

"What is it, sweetheart?"

"I want you to go home, tonight. I am so thankful for you staying with us, since this has started, but you need to go home and get some real rest in your own bed."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Mom. Go home. Get a good night's sleep. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Well, if you are sure. I'll get say good night to the kids and get going. "

My Mom kisses my cheek and runs upstairs. As soon as she leaves, I lock up the house and head to my bedroom.

I start to close the door to the bedroom, but I remember I have that I have to leave the bedroom door partially open to listen for Matthew. He's been suffering from nightmares ever since the dreaded telephone call.

I stand at the foot of the bed and stare at Bella's side of the bed. I haven't attempted to sleep in the bed since the barbeque. I've slept on the couch and made it upstairs before anyone got up, so they wouldn't notice. I go and take a hot shower. It helps to relieve some of the muscle soreness in my back.

I go and change into some pajamas and slide into bed. I roll over and grab Bella's pillow. I bury my face in it. She left for her trip over a month ago, but there is still a hint of her scent. It is very soothing.

I think about where she is. Is she hurt? Has someone come across her and is trying to help her in one means or another? I can only hope and pray. A sense of peace comes across me. The belief of knowing she'll be in my arms once again, is one of the only things that keeps me going. All I can do is take one day at a time and that is exactly what I am going to do.