Caitlin could imagine the air in the room chilling to absolute zero as she felt the tension in the room grow as the team stared at a nervous Killer Frost standing off to the side with her bags.
Moving to the front, Harry met each team member's eyes and motioned to their guest. "Before you say anything, hear her out first."
Cisco stepped forward, gesturing between Killer Frost and Caitlin, asking, "How can you trust her when you're trying to stop yourself from becoming her?"
Feeling the need to defend Killer Frost, Caitlin stood beside the woman, giving her team a heated look. "That's not fair, Cisco. My issues aren't part of what's going on right now."
Harry took long strides to stand close to Caitlin and spoke in a determined voice. "Different earth, different person." He took a deep breath and continued airing his thoughts. "I mean, I didn't judge you--" he pointed at Cisco, "--when your doppelganger, Reverb, was evil on my earth."
Suddenly the floor was very interesting to an ashamed Cisco. Barry looked at Killer Frost, saying in the kind way he had, "Okay, tell us what happened."
Caitlin could see that the woman was nervous - she'd never seen any version of Killer Frost so pale and hesitant to speak - so she gave her a reassuring nod. Killer Frost bit her cheek before she edged forward. Now in the center of the room, she looked around at the team of people staring at her. "HR and I are married, have been for about seven years now." Her voice hitched. "We adopted a little girl and named her Neva." Killer Frost took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "She died in a car accident, caused by Julian, and when Julian fled the country, HR blamed himself. He blamed himself so much that he asked Randolph to help him dampen the memory. But instead, Randolph made him forget everything. Everything! Including our entire relationship." Killer Frost's voice broke - making Caitlin want to give her a hug.
Caitlin saw Harry staring at her, looking worried. Deciding that now was not the time to ask him what was wrong, she looked at her team again. They all had their heads low, regretting judging Killer Frost.
"Okay, so how do we help HR?" Cisco asked, watching Killer Frost with unfeigned sympathy.
Going back over to her bags, Killer Frost picked up the blue one - Caitlin remembered Harry fetching that one. In the center of the room she unzipped the bag, revealing what looked to be a helmet - vaguely like a high tech bicycle helmet - albeit with wires and lights.
"What is that?" Harry asked. Caitlin couldn't help but feel her curiosity pique too as she looked at the strange item.
Killer Frost turned the device in her hands saying, "It's a memory viewer."
Iris settled her hands on her hips, giving Earth-19's version of Killer Frost a confused look. "The what now?"
"It's a device that will allow us to see HR's memories."
Cisco held out his hands. "Do you mind if I take a look?" Caitlin and Harry exchanged smiles - of course, he'd want to have a better look.
Noticing that the man they were discussing was nowhere to be seen, Caitlin wondered where he could be. "Hey guys, where's HR?"
Not wanting to take his eyes from the device, Cisco pointed in the direction of the medical bay. "Oh, he's in the med bay."
Hearing this, Killer Frost's stomach clenched and panic spread throughout her body. "What happened!?" Caitlin was her echo - looking at one another they mirrored almost exact anguished expressions.
Harry was silent, deep in thought. Caitlin wanted more than anything to be able to read Harry's mind - his brows were so furrowed - if only she had some clue about his thoughts and feelings.
"Nothing! He was just acting weird again." Cisco finally stopped examining the new tech to notice their worried expressions and respond.
"How does this thing work?" Barry's question pulled Caitlin from her wool-gathering.
Killer Frost took the device from Cisco and placed it back in the bag. "Well, HR needs to be asleep so we'll be able to see his memories better." She sighed. "Then we hook it up to a computer, put in the date of the accident and see what pops up."
Caitlin felt that wasn't everything. The method of how to use it was simple - but exactly what would it do to HR's brain? Nothing was ever as easy as first it seemed...
"Then what?" Harry asked.
Killer Frost forced herself to keep talking. "If the memory isn't what it's supposed to be, we apply a small shock to his brain."
Iris and Caitlin locked gazes, silently communicating - 'that sounded dangerous!'
"Alright let's do it," Harry said determinedly, "If this is the only way to get his memories back let's give it a try."
Caitlin felt like she had to speak up. "That sounds really dangerous - what if we just make it worse?" She could hear her own voice shaking.
Licking his lips Harry, turned and snapped at her. "Caitlin, this is the only way. No one else knows what to do."
Feeling hurt from his tone, Caitlin looked around the room, hoping to find some support, sighing when no one else spoke up. "Fine."
Caitlin went to the med bay to talk to HR, she could feel someone came to stand beside her - looking out the corner of her eye, she saw Harry. She stopped and pivoted to face him with her full attention. "Got something else to add?"
Harry coughed and cleared his voice, speaking softly and apologetically, "I'm sorry for snapping at you. I just…" Harry sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. Opening them again, he continued. "I think it's unfair what happened and I really want to help HR. This is the only thing we have at our disposal."
Caitlin's heart was hammering in her chest as she swam in his blue eyes. Reaching out, she gently touched his arm. "I know, we all do, but I don't want to cause more damage."
Harry nodded. "I know, but this might be the only way to help him. We don't have time to reverse engineer the device to make it safer, and if HR's wife is giving the okay...what more do we need?"
Caitlin closed her eyes, letting her pent breath release, then said: "Alright, let's do this." Somewhere deep inside herself, Caitlin knew she'd do whatever she could - if she were in the same position as Killer Frost.
Inside the med bay HR was rummaging through papers, making an ungodly mess. "HR, what're you doing?" Caitlin bit the corner of her lips and restrained the annoyed sigh that threatened to rise. She'd need hours to fix such a level of disarray.
Turning to face both of them, HR smiled brightly and said, "I was just looking for my drumsticks. Have you seen them?"
Okay, he seems like he's not having a moment. Taking a few more steps closer, Caitlin spoke tentatively, "We need your help doing an experiment."
He seemed more than happy to help as HR eagerly nodded and almost shouted his answer, "Yeah! Sounds like fun."
Pointing to the bed, Caitlin said, "Okay, good, we're going to need you to lie down."
"Okay, but no funny business." He joked as he walked over to the bed and laid down.
From the supply cabinet, Caitlin grabbed the things she would need, filling a syringe with general anesthesia. Now beside her reclined patient, Caitlin's heart raced with worry. What if something went wrong? Pushing the intrusive thought aside she stuck the needle into HR's arm and injected the medicine. The man lost consciousness quicker than she expected. Probably because he hasn't been sleeping at night - she remembered Cisco and Harry had said something about that.
"Is he asleep?" Caitlin didn't have to turn around to know that it was Killer Frost asking - she sounded worried.
Nodding her head, Caitlin turned and watched as the other woman slowly came closer, her icy eyes never leaving her husband's sleeping face. "Let's get started."
Pulling the memory viewer from the bag, Killer Frost walked to the bed and put the device on his head. She instructed, "Harry, take that cord from the bag and hook it up to the computer." He did so and Killer Frost plugged the other end into the top of the memory viewer device. A blue light glowed from the front of the device. "Okay, Harry you should be able to see something." Killer Frost walked over to look at the screen. "That's not right. This never would have happened." She toggled a switch.
The woman's words caused Caitlin's stomach to tighten in knots. What was wrong? Before she could voice her concerns, HR started having a seizure on the bed, his arms and legs flailing, his head tossing from side to side.
Harry shouted, "Shut it off!"
Something crashed behind her, Caitlin saw Killer Frost had covered her computer in ice. Switching her focus back to HR, she saw that the device was now off. "Guys, I need help!" she hollered.
thank you to DancesWithSeatbelts for helping me with this chapter.
