A/N: Hi guys! Once again - a big thanks to everyone who has taken the time to review last chapter! I can't tell you how much it means to me.
I'm sorry it took longer than usual for me to post this chapter. My life has been a complete mess for the past few weeks and on top of that (or because of that?) I got sick. Anyway, it caused me to have a writers-block the size of an elephant dancing trough my living-room.
Hopefully you guys can forgive me. I promise next chapter won't take this long.
In this chapter we'll finally see our favourite couple in action once again!
I'll be playing a bit with p.o.v.'s (it's my story, so I get to experiment :p) Please let me know what you think!
Enjoy!
Chapter 9 - How we need another soul to cling to.
Lucius was in his rooms, standing in front of the enormous mirror, attacking his silky blonde hair with a comb. His long hair was so straight that it usually didn't get tangled, but lately it seemed to happen more often. Lucius knew what caused it, he was fully aware that he tended to mess with it during his writing. Lucius groaned as he located several more knots throughout the soft strands and continued to drag the comb down, ignoring the pain that that less than careful approach caused.
After he was finished, Lucius tied his hair back with a black ribbon and went to pick himself an outfit for dinner. He picked dark blue robes. Lucius rarely ever wore anything but black or green. However, after a glance in the mirror, he had to admit that this specific colour of deep blue didn't look to bad.
He also had to admit that he was very much in need of a shave. Dark stubble covered his chin and cheeks.
Lucius glanced at the old mantel-piece clock. He had ten more minutes before he was supposed to meet Hermione for dinner. He knew it was barely enough time to shave and he hated to make her wait, but he just didn't want her to see him like this. If he started to neglect his appearance she would probably just start to worry about him, bloody Gryffindors.
Hermione was already sitting at the dining table as Lucius entered the room. The girl had to be thinking about something. She was so submerged in her own thoughts that she didn't even look up as Lucius entered. Lucius had to admit she looked lovely. She was wearing a simple grey pencil dress that Lucius remembered buying when they where in Paris. The woollen dress might have looked cold and professional on anyone else but it hugged Hermione's body so perfectly that it seemed anything but cold and professional on her. Actually, Lucius thought he could feel the temperature in the room rising as he looked at her.
He couched softly, trying to make the girl aware of his presence without startling her. It worked, Hermione's head shot up and she smiled at him.
Was it just him or had something changed in the way she looked at him? Before, she had always looked at him with friendly politeness. He had been able to see that she cared, to a certain extend, but she had never seemed to take any actual interest in his person. Right now her eyes where warmer, and they seemed to hold a strange curiosity that hadn't been there before. Lucius! Stop thinking nonsense. Have you really been alone for that long? How could you possibly see something like that in her eyes? He scolded himself.
"You are late." Hermione stated matter of factly.
"I know, I am sorry." Lucius replied.
"I'll forgive you. Just this once." Hermione said as she watched Lucius taking his seat.
"Thank you for your kindness." Lucius said, before winking at her. "So how was your day?" He inquired as he reached for the tumbler filled with red wine that had appeared on the table.
"It was fine." the girl across the table answered, she seemed to be a bit aloof. As if she didn't really wanted to talk about her day. "I guess there is no need for me to ask you about your day?"
"No." Lucius smiled. "My day was much like any other day. Wine?"
"Yes please." Hermione said as she went to put food on her plate.
Lucius pored two glasses of the red wine, handing one to Hermione. He swirled the wine around in his own glass and sniffed it. Than he took a small sip, savouring the rich taste. For a moment he closed his eyes, forgetting everything around him. "Now that's what I call a good Bordeaux." He said, opening his eyes again.
Hermione watched her husband. The man had his eyes closed and was clearly enjoying the wine he had just pored for the two of them. After her conversation with Narcissa she didn't know what to think about Lucius. And so she decided to simply look at him, really look at him. And see what her own conclusions on the man would be.
Now that he had his eyes closed Hermione felt safe to study his face without being caught. Right now he seemed relaxed, but even now she could see the worry lines that had formed on his face in the past couple of years. It made him look older. Or actually – it made him look closer to his own age. He still looked ridiculously good for his age though. An other thing she noticed where the dark circles under his eyes. They confirmed what Narcissa had said about Lucius having nightmares.
Before Hermione could examine his face any more Lucius opened his eyes again. "Now that's what I call a good Bordeaux."
"Do you have anything but fine wines?"
"Well, no. However this one truly is amazing. Go on, try it."
Hermione did as she was told and took a sip as well. She didn't know much about wine but she understood what Lucius meant. The drink had a rich flavour but wasn't to present. It was just right.
"Very nice, indeed." Hermione admitted.
Lucius crooked his eyebrow. "You have no idea what you're talking about, do you?"
"Then why did you ask?" Hermione asked, feeling a blush creep to her cheeks.
"For no reason in particular."
"Prick" Hermione said under her breath.
"I'm sorry dear, what was that?"
"Nothing, nothing" Hermione said. She hadn't meant for him to hear it, but she didn't really mind that he had.
For the next fifteen minutes they focussed on their dinner and sipped their wine. It was a comfortable silence. Every few minutes Hermione would glance up to study Lucius. Every few minutes Lucius pretended not to notice, before glancing up himself to study his wife's face as well.
Lucius was the first to break the silence. "So how was Esmeraude doing today?"
"Great." Hermione replied. Her face started to shine as she continued. "She actually said her first word."
Lucius was in his element. He cherished these stolen moments of happiness. Good food, good wine, and especially; good company. At these moments he almost felt as if everything was normal. He could put his mind of all the horrors that where in it and just enjoy family life. He knew it wasn't real. A man – A broken man, he could admit that to himself now – having dinner with his beautiful wife – who had not married him out of love and who didn't share his bed- and a small child sleeping upstairs -a child who wasn't his or his wife's-. It was far from perfect, but it was still much more than he deserved. And so he cherished it.
"So how was Esmeraude doing today?" Lucius inquired. He was very fond of the babygirl who he saw as his own child.
"Great." Hermione replied. Lucius saw her face lighting up. Merlin she's beautiful. "She actually said her first word"
"She did?" He asked, amazed. He kept forgetting how fast small children grew up. It had been the same with Draco. When Draco was born he had been so busy with the death-eaters, the family business and the ministry that he had barely been there during the boy's first year. And now his son was in Azkaban and he was, again, missing all the important moments of a small child that carried his name. "What was it?"
"She said momma!" Hermione exclaimed happily. She started talking rapidly about how she had been wondering when Esmeraude would start talking and about how she herself had been speaking full sentences at one year old. Of course she had. Lucius slowly zoned out, thinking about Draco and Narcissa. The guilt that he usually only felt at night came flooding in. No, Lucius! Snap out of it. This is not the time nor place to have a breakdown. He took a deep breath and pulled himself together again, making a mental note to visit Narcissa's grave in the morning. Suddenly he realised Hermione had stopped talking to him and was now staring at him intently. Once their eyes met she started blushing and averted her eyes.
"She said momma!" Hermione exclaimed. "Oh I am so excited! I was wondering when she would say her first word. I looked it up in a few books and they said that it could be around now but that it could also take up to a year. I was starting to worry because I remember my mum telling me that I spoke full sentences at one year old. But then again I might have been talking a bit early. Anyway I hope that now she has started talking she will learn more words. It is so much easier to understand what she wants if she can actually tell me..." Hermione stopped her rambling. She had looked up only to see that Lucius had obviously zoned out on her. His eyes where distant and from the lines that had appeared in his face she could tell that he was troubled. The man took a deep breath and seemed to return to the world of the living. Only to look right at her. Even when he looked so troubled the man still had one of the most beautiful faces she had ever seen. And those stormy grey eyes where not helping either. Hermione felt the blood rush to her cheeks rapidly and she quickly averted her eyes.
"That's amazing." Lucius said, clearly feeling that he was expected to reply.
"You didn't hear a word I said, did you?" Hermione accused.
"Ow! That hurts Hermione. Of course I heard what you said!" He said whilst giving her a mocking wink. "You where telling me that you where speaking at only one year old. Even though I must say that that is very impressing I am also wondering what you must've put your poor parents trough."
Hermione couldn't help but laugh at that. She still didn't believe that he had heard everything she had just said and she knew she should be at least a bit hurt by what he had just said, but he was obviously joking around. And to be honest, he was probably right about what she had put her parents trough.
After that they both resumed to eating quietly. It was Hermione's turn now to be submerged in thought. The casual mention of her parents had made her think of them. She knew she needn't worry. For as far as she could tell they where still safely and happily living in Australia. She had planned to go find them and return their memories after the war, but that wa
s out of the question now. How on earth was she supposed to explain the choices she had made? "Hi mum and dad! As you can see we are in Australia. That's because I modified your memories to make me disappear from them and make you believe you wanted to move here. I did that to keep you guys safe while I fought in a war against the darkest wizard of the century and his followers while I was only a teenager. Oh and by the way, I am now married to one of his followers and taking care of the child of an other follower. Oh and remember that boy I told you about, Draco, who always used to tease me? Yeah well the man I'm married to is sort of his dad. He is also over twice my age, their family is the richest family in Britain and oh...I think I am actually falling in love with him."
There was no other possibility than that that would end in disaster and her parents would probably never speak to her again. Of course that did not mean that Hermione didn't miss her parents. They might not be wizards and therefore not understand much about the wizarding world but they where human and she would have liked to be able to talk to them about Lucius and about how she was falling in love with him and about how the fact that he wanted to turn himself in made her stomach turn and her heart ache. Hermione didn't like to admit it but she felt very lonely.
Lucius in his turn noticed how worried his young wife looked. He realized that mentioning her parents might not have been the smartest thing. He wasn't sure where her parents where. He vaguely remembered seeing their last name on a 'raid-list' once but he also remembered how Greyback and his men had come back to the manor empty-handed. They had not been able to find the Grangers and it had seemed as if they had dissolved into thin air. It had not been a big deal back then. In those days there where several raids a day –often there where no survivors-. They where just names on a list. Names that couldn't be crossed off, but nothing more then that.
Lucius wanted to ask her about it but he didn't dare. He saw the pained look in her eyes and was afraid he would make matters worse. His mind was going very fast- trying to find a way to ease her pain. Lucius had to admit that he was surprised about his feelings for Hermione. Yes, he cared for the girl, he had for a very long time now. However, only recently he had started to realize just how deep those feelings went. Right now he wanted nothing more than to ease her pain. Then suddenly he thought of something.
"So, did you receive an other letter from the Weasley girl today?"
"I did" Hermione sighed. "I'm not sure what to reply though."
"Why don't you invite her over?"
Hermione's eyes went wide in shock, making Lucius chuckle.
"You know that's not possible! What if something goes wrong? What if they find you?"
"You trust her, don't you?"
"Well yes, but..."
"But nothing. I am well aware of the risks Hermione, but if you trust her, I trust her. You don't have to tell her where the manor is. You could send her a portkey that will only take one person. I could make one for you if you wish me to."
"Won't the ministry be able to detect an unregistered portkey?"
"Not necessarily" Lucius smirked. "You don't honestly think that the death-eaters registered their portkeys, do you?"
"Well no, I guess not."
"There is more than one way to make a portkey. But only the common portkeys can be detected."
"And that's not...dangerous?" Hermione asked, still not conviced.
"Not everything the followers of the dark lord used is dangerous. We did know more than just dark magic." He winked at her.
"Well. I suppose that would be true. I'll have to think about this though."
"Hermione, you have been lonely long enough. A young woman shouldn't lock herself in a house and not see anyone. I know you want to protect Esmeraude and me but you need a friend. Ginevra has been your friend for years. I trust your judgement of people and besides, she already knows where you are."
Hermione sighed and dragged her fingers trough her hair. "You are right." She said, still looking a bit doubtful. "I'll send Ginny a letter to see how she feels about it."
Lucius gave her a very rare warm smile. He was glad that she had agreed to invite the Weasley girl. He knew it was a risk but what he had said was true; Hermione trusted the girl, and Lucius trusted Hermione's gudgement. However, Lucius couldn't deny that he felt a bit worried about it. After all, Ginevra had reasons not to like her.
A/N: And that's chapter 9! I hope you guys liked it. Next chapter Lucius will visit Narcissa's grave and we might just find out who Narcissa was in love with it. (keep your eyes open for hints).
- "How we need another soul to cling to." - Sylvia Plath
Thank you so much for reading this chaoter, and please review! My muse is addicted to reviews the way I am addicted to licorice.
