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Chapter Nine
Adrian
"We'll help get her out of there, Adrian," Lissa vowed with a nod. "But first, we have to help you."
"Is this one of those spirit-charmed rings?" I asked, rubbing the silver around my finger. "You weren't very good at making them if I remember correctly."
"I wasn't very efficient in making them," she corrected. "But there was nothing wrong with the ones I made. It just took me longer. Now I have Nina. She's one of the best and has been teaching me."
I remembered how Nina Sinclair had helped me direct spirit into one of the rings to keep the element contained in her restored sister's blood. She made it seem so simple that even I had caught on immediately.
Lissa steered me toward the couch opposite of Jill. Before I could sit, I shuddered again as warmth tingled down my spine. My head whipped to Christian next to me, his hand still on my back. "What are you doing? I'm not going to find a handprint singed in my hoodie, am I?"
One side of his mouth tipped up. "No, not today. I am lighting you up, but not in the way you think. For you, I'd guess it's more like basking in a non-lethal sun. I use it on Lissa when she's stressed and has a bad day. Normally with a back massage."
"Say no more," I said, sitting down. "I don't want to know the specifics. Except, how are you doing it? I'm guessing you're not using fire."
"You're right. I'm not." Facing me, he sat on the coffee table and clasped his hands together. "I was curious about something and experimented. After a lot of practice and fine-tuning, I found I could create light."
I suddenly thought of Sydney's God, how he had commanded, Let there be light, and there was. If the old Sydney had heard Christian, she would have jumped away and made the sign of the cross on her shoulder, outraged and terrified. The new Sydney would have pounced on Christian for answers, wanting specifics with that eager way of hers.
I was curious myself. It didn't make sense. "How? Fire is the element."
Christian's eyes gleamed. "What is fire but a conflagration of light, heat, and a reaction of chemicals or minerals? If I can control it as a whole, why not in parts?"
"Huh." Thinking of it that way, the new aspect to his ability made sense. Lissa and I could wield spirit but could also heal or spirit dream. We could see auras, and our compulsion was the strongest of the Moroi. Oksana, another spirit user who Rose had met in Russia, could brush minds—read and enter them. What could the users of the other elements do? "Wow."
"I know. It makes you wonder." Christian's excitement and smile faded. "Watching Sydney create the mixture for the Strigoi vaccine made me think of it actually. I thought of how the needed materials, separately, didn't seem so significant—except Olive's spirit-infused blood, of course. But they were. All those ingredients mattered in that small vial. Together, they held something so great, so important. Like all five elements in a stake held by a spirit user against Strigoi."
"He's been trying to break down everything since," Lissa said, smiling at him. She looked at me. "Now, how long—"
I raised a hand. "Wait. What's wrong with Jailbait?" Lissa and Rose grimaced.
"She experienced whatever you did," Rose answered. "And to help you get out of it, she took some of your darkness."
"What?" I shot up and swayed, but hands steadied me and urged me to sit back down. I craned my neck to look around Christian to Jill. She was breathing slower. Her eyes and jaw were no longer clenched shut, but her expression was hollow, haunted. It gave me the chills until she focused on me.
I'm okay, she mouthed.
"She's going to be fine," assured Rose. "She just needs a moment. Dimitri's helped me come back from it before, and as you can see, Eddie's with her."
"But you got ragey when you took Lissa's darkness," I pointed out. "Jill doesn't look it. Or did she, and I not see it?"
"That's just it," Lissa started. "We don't know what happened to you. You and I react differently to spirit's effects. It's why we took different medications, right? I was depressed. You're moody. Usually the darkness makes me wrathful, so when Rose took it, it did the same to her. This—you … you weren't … here, like you were lost inside your own head."
"That's … that's the first time it's happened," I said lamely. Or was it? Would I be even aware if it wasn't? I wasn't earlier. Rose's, Lissa's, and Christian's expressions reflected they wondered the same thing.
"Well, we have to figured out what the trigger is," said Lissa. "And how to avoid that."
I couldn't really pinpoint the exact cause or anything different. There was the usual depression, that sinking despair and hopelessness, mixed with desperation and a crushing realization that I was so … small. I'd had a similar feeling before, but I couldn't very well admit it to them and how I was going so crazy that I heard Aunt Tatiana's voice in my darkest hours—and have gone from that to being completely oblivious of what was happening around me. It was too close to being mindless, unhinged. I didn't want to discuss it with anyone and definitely not with so many people around, all their eyes watching me.
"Adrian and I will figure it out," Jill whispered, voice raspy, but the message was clear. I wanted to hug her at that moment. She gave me a small smile, letting me know she got it.
Lissa looked ready to disagree but eventually nodded. "If it happens again, though, you have to tell me or Rose. No more secrets if we can help it."
"Okay," I agreed but was conscious of the secrets I would be keeping. I pushed that niggling feeling aside quickly before I gave it away. "So, what's your idea, cousin?"
"The formula for the tattoo to stop Strigoi conversion," Lissa said archly, as if the answer were obvious. "Sydney made it. We need it. We need her, and the Alchemists support the cause. They wouldn't deny us anything to insure a stop to Strigoi conversion."
It was a great idea, one I had thought of it before, but … "It won't be that easy."
"Maybe not, but I want to see what they say. My mind's already swirling with replies and how to cut them down." She stood and smoothed the skirt of her dress. As she walked around the room, that fierce determination overtook her face again. "Besides the few family members it affects, we haven't told anyone else outside of our inner circle about the tattoo's success. Sure, our people will celebrate. Some will question. Others will come forward to help. It's a great way to unite and invigorate the Moroi and dhampirs."
She stopped and turned to everyone. "But the news will certainly bring the Strigoi upon us, and we aren't ready for it. We need more of the vaccine—a more effective way to make it without having to restore a Strigoi every time. There aren't enough known spirit users, and I won't ask those we know to do it. Restoring one is hard enough on us." She continued pacing. "So, we need the Alchemists' help. We need Sydney. I need her. I trust her. And I won't bend on this."
This was a side of Lissa I had never seen before today, reminding me that she too had changed. I always knew she would be a great queen, and I'd seen her slip into that skin before, but being queen suited her. I had been worried that the throne and all the stress it brought would crush her gentle nature in some way over time, straining her mind or shadowing her spirit.
It hadn't. It drove her, gave her purpose, fueled her like nothing else could.
She spun toward us. "Well, what do you think?"
"I think," I said, "that we have the most beautiful and inspiring queen ever."
Christian rapped his knuckles against the table. "Hear, hear."
Lissa colored and then in all seriousness asked, "I mean they wouldn't refuse, so that would get Sydney out, right?"
"It wouldn't hurt to ask." I was more hopeful than before but wouldn't let my expectations get too high. "It's the only thing that makes sense without looking suspicious, and it can get Sydney away from of there faster than us searching for her."
"Do you really think the Alchemists won't let her come?" Rose asked, frowning. "I get they want to 're-educate' her, but they want to stop the turning to Strigoi as much as we do."
I shrugged. "I don't know what to expect of the Alchemists anymore. I'm sure you didn't think the pure holier-than-thou were capable of torturing their people."
Neil, who had been sitting on the side, eating with Angeline, shifted in his seat. Dimitri's eyes flicked to the movement, and his brows furrowed. I bit back a curse.
Inner cogs spinning, Dimitri scanned my friends, flitting past me before darting back again and meeting my gaze, which was my mistake. He saw that as another anomaly. I should have pretended I didn't notice Neil or him anxious, but I was exhausted and tired of acting nonchalant. I needed something real, something of substance since I couldn't have it in a glass or in the form of Sydney. I also was ready to be taken seriously.
Still, I couldn't help but taunt. "You all right, comrade? Looks like you're missing something."
Instead of narrowed eyes, I got a glimmer of … approval. Dimitri turned away and honed in on the one person guaranteed to bend to him, to report efficiently without blubbering or glib remarks—Eddie, his mini-me.
"It's time you tell us what happened in Palm Springs," he said to the younger guardian. "And why you're all so doubtful of the Alchemists' cooperation on this."
Unlike Neil would have, Eddie smartly started from the beginning and kept a few details vague. He recounted the night of Sydney's capture, brushing over how he and she were supposed to be meeting one of her contacts without mentioning Marcus, focusing instead on Sydney's father and sister's words and how determined the Alchemists were to capture her. At the mention of guns, everyone tensed.
"What?" Rose exclaimed. "The Alchemists actually carry them?"
Eddie nodded. "We were surprised, too." He hesitated for a second, and with his next words, I understood why. "They had no issues of shooting, either." As expected, expressions darkened, and he was quick to assure. "Neither Sydney or I were shot."
Like her scowl, Lissa's tone was low, dangerous. "But they wouldn't have had problem if you were?"
"I can't speak for them," Eddie answered diplomatically.
"Your reply tells me enough." Lissa took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Christian stood up to stand by her side, laying a hand on the small of her back. "Now I understand. Go on, Eddie."
Well, now it got tricky. How much to say and give away? Although Wolfe and Jackie gave us their blessing to inform only our most trusted friends of their involvement, we still felt we were exposing the two humans to scrutiny and more danger.
But the four of us at Wolfe's wanted to tell as much necessary truth as possible. We wouldn't take any chances. The info we had and were presenting was contingent on too many events that occurred dependently upon each other. Also, there were so many nuances that we were worried we wouldn't be able to keep the lies straight while keeping everything believable—like why we had called from the airport before nightfall when Strigoi could only venture outside after dark. We weren't willing to endanger Jill to wait a few hours so we could lie, and Eddie would never claim a kill that wasn't his either.
And not only did we not want to lie to our friends and queen, but we recognized this as an opportunity to accomplish many things at once, too. We could track, expand, and protect.
So, seeming relieved, Eddie didn't finish the story of the night Sydney was captured. Her using human magic wasn't our secret to tell. Eddie felt guilty and ashamed enough for being tricked; he didn't need to relive it again. Instead, he launched into brief and again vague explanations of what had happened the following weeks, and no one seemed to notice the topic leap.
He skipped over my weeks of deep self-medicating, for which I was thankful. My mood dipped, though, as he revealed our efforts to stay under the Alchemist's radar. My bad boy gimmick, the training sessions, Jill (with Eddie) accompanying me as a buffer to see Sydney's connections but also learning self-defense—hearing it all said aloud made me realize how foolish the plans were.
And as I relayed our attempts to find Sydney, the tension and worry only grew in the room and myself. I had to admit that meeting at Wolfe's, Jackie's scrying, and then returning to his place even after learning he knew about our kind—essentially, us trusting them—sounded reckless. Everyone was brimming with questions and, I was sure, vicious reprimands, but they let Eddie and I continue without interrupting.
I hadn't given my duffel bag to be taken to my room, so I reached over and pulled out what I needed.
"These are just still shots," I said, handing the two sets of photos to Lissa and Dimitri. Christian and Rose moved to look over their shoulders. "But Wolfe gave me a copy of videos if you need them."
"These were taken from his 'compound,' you say?" asked Dimitri, not looking away from the prints in his hands. "How big and secluded is this place?"
"It's on the outskirts of town," I replied without really answering. "And 'compound' … is the only way to describe the property and its size."
"It's about half an urban block," clarified Eddie. Of course he would know and make note. "Three buildings—a small house with no windows, a standard indoor gun range, and a warehouse less than four thousand square feet. Closest substantial structure is two miles away, with the highway about a mile. The surrounding land's pretty barren."
Dimitri hummed. Although the tone didn't give anything away but that he was deep in thought, it sounded damning. The four of them continued studying the photos of the Strigoi, Alchemist, and Wolfe decapitating the first.
Eddie, Jill, Neil, and I shared nervous glances as we gave our friends time to collect their thoughts. Had we made the right choice in telling them so much? I had been sure we were before. Now, I wasn't.
I sipped on orange juice, wishing it were spiked, but I had multiple dates with spirit dreams tonight. Jill chewed on her lip. Eddie looked resigned and ready to be punished. Neil seemed resolved as well, which was a surprise since he knew and had little do with what happened until the last moment. He was sticking with us regardless, and I almost smiled at that fact.
But then my eyes fell on Angeline. Tears streamed down her cheeks, even as she rushed to wipe them away. My stomach sank, and I moved to talk to her. She raised a hand and shook her head. Along with the crying, her silence was so uncharacteristic of her that it spoke of how hurt and betrayed she felt at being kept out of the loop.
Neil, seeming unsure and uncomfortable with what to do, reached out to her. She yanked her arm away. Okay, so she was angry too.
"Wow," Lissa said, finally breaking the quiet. "You all have been busy."
I was sure we would have chuckled if we weren't so on edge and suddenly feeling guilty.
Seeing that, Lissa smiled sadly. "I'm not going to yell at you guys. I think you realize how irresponsible all this was. But I understand it. We've shared enough situations like these, and I know you were only to protect one another. I can't be mad about that."
We sighed in relief, yet it still seemed hard to breathe.
Dimitri tapped on one of the pictures of Wolfe wielding his cutlass, the blade arced high in the air. I realized then that everyone was waiting for Lissa to speak first, another sign of her sovereignty. "D—"
A knock interrupted him. Lissa checked her watch and sighed. "I have another meeting in ten, and I can't miss it."
We all stood, but she waved her hand. "Oh, stop. You have a lot to discuss, or you can head to bed if you'd like. I know you're on human schedules and must be exhausted. Dimitri will keep me updated, and we'll meet again later." She turned to Jill. "If you're up, maybe we can have dinner? Well, dinner for me and breakfast for you."
Jill nodded, looking just as nervous and, yes, hopeful, as her sister. "Okay."
"Okay," repeated Lissa, her relief visible. She turned to Christian, whom she seemed to know would be staying. When she stepped out of his embrace and walked to the door, she called, "Rose."
"But—"
"No. You're coming with me." Lissa opened the hall door. The guardians on the other side snapped to attention.
Rose grumbled and kissed her brooding Russian. Before joining her queen's side, she pointed at me. "Don't think you're saved. We'll talk later."
"I know, little dhampir." I gave her a grin. "Your foot has an appointment with my ass."
"Damn straight," she muttered and slipped through the door. Lissa winked at me.
"If we weren't obscurely related," I joked because we really weren't‚ "I'd marry you just for that, Your Majesty."
Her smile was huge and bright before it dimmed. "You're taken now anyway."
My smile turned soft, sad. "I am." Now if only I get her back.
As if she'd heard me, Lissa hesitated, seeming to struggle with what she wanted to say. But I understood. Even if we got Sydney out of the re-education center, it didn't mean she was free of the Alchemists, and while everyone in the room seemed to accept the idea of us, no one else would. Not the Alchemists. Not our people, Moroi or dhampir.
There was no solution. Sydney and I could run, hide away, but not forever if the Alchemists were determined. And with either race, it would be an ongoing battle. One that Lissa didn't want for another friend. One with which she was powerless to do more. One that she couldn't openly support in her position. Not only because it could anger the Alchemists, but also because she would lose the footing she'd gained with our people; they would question her.
And, as I studied the girl, now young woman and Queen, who I cared for like and used think of as my fraternal twin because she was the first person I encountered who reflected and understood my war with spirit, I began to wonder if she had any faith in her plan or even believed in Sydney and me. Her aura, gold like all spirit users, was cloudy and knobby with doubt. Or maybe it was guilt.
"Go," I told her. "We'll talk later."
Lissa nodded, solemn. When the door closed behind her, Dimitri began his questioning. Eddie answered, as I barely paid attention, trying to calm my emotions and then reach out to Sydney. I ached for her, needed her and that unwavering faith. Centrum permanebit. Would the center hold, Sydney? Because I felt empty and off kilter, especially when I found blank blackness on the other side.
The couch cushion shifted beneath me from a new weight. Jill leaned against my side.
I'm okay, I thought to her.
A small smile and a huff of a chuckle touched my arm. I wrapped it around her, knowing how pointless it would be to tell her not to worry. The bond was strengthening. I might have been slipping, but simply being near each other seemed to help reassure us. We were both quiet, lost in thought, until the meeting ended.
"Do you think they'll come?" whispered Eddie. He and I trailed behind the rest of the gang, plus Nina and Olive Sinclair who were leading us to our rooms.
The half-sisters had been waiting outside the media room when we finished making plans with Dimitri and Christian. It wasn't a surprise. Neil and Olive were dating, and despite Nina being a Moroi and Olive a dhampir, the sisters were close. They grew up together—something else that, while not quite taboo, was uncommon nonetheless—and Nina had risked her life and sanity to restore her dhampir sister from the Strigoi state.
I just wanted to avoid the spirit user as long as possible. Even now, as Jill chatted with her, Nina kept stealing glances back at me. It hadn't escaped Jill's notice. She surreptitiously tried to keep Nina's attention and gave me droll look as Nina yet again glanced in my direction. I winked at Jill for her efforts, receiving a rueful smile and shake of the head in return.
Answering Eddie, I shrugged and kept my voice low. "I'm not sure, but I don't see why they wouldn't come. With all his stories, Wolfe seems well traveled and always up for adventure. Like you guys are—were—Jackie's on break, too."
I kept forgetting no one would be returning to Amberwood now that the family quorum was null and void. It was weird to think about. Like a phantom limb, an extension of us had been abruptly cut off but was still present in our minds; the sudden vacancy was unbelievable and a little painful.
I shook my head and the morbid thought away. "We can keep an eye on them," I continued. It was one worry crossed off the list. "Make sure they're safe for a week. And since they'll be staying close by, not here at Court, they won't be subjected to our people's prying eyes, wagging tongues, and vicious teeth."
I wasn't sure how the two humans would feel about us digging into their past, though. Background checks were smart on our part and exactly what we wanted. It would reassure a few us, especially Eddie, Dimitri, and me. But I still felt guilty. The couple trusted our group, hardly asking questions or pushing for anything, and willingly put their lives at risk to help us.
Speaking of guilt, trust, and risk, we came upon Angeline's room first. She entered and left the door open. Jill and Eddie followed. Neil and I hung back with the Sinclair sisters. I didn't want to linger, but Neil was preoccupied with Olive.
"We're going to have a little powwow," I told Nina. "Can you just point out where our rooms are?" I didn't want them sticking around. I had a feeling the next few minutes would be loud.
Nina indicated everyone's rooms. I thanked her and looked at Neil. He and Olive were in their own world. They weren't touching, but the vibes exuding from them suggested they were one step away from finding their own room.
I cleared my throat. "Neil."
He stiffened. A red flush crept up the back of his neck to his ears. I felt sorry for the guy. For all his support, the least I could do was buy him time. "When y—"
He shook his head. "No, I'm coming."
I wanted to remark on his choice of words but kept my mouth shut. A strangled noise came from my side. I glanced at the source. Nina was shaking, lips smashed together. Her eyes gleamed with amusement as they met mine. I almost lost it then and had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing.
Neil said a quiet, promise-filled goodbye to Olive before, looking as if he were going into battle, he stepped into Angeline's room.
As I turned to follow, Nina reached out to me. "Is everything all right, Adrian? Are … are you all right?"
I mustered a smile. "Of course. Just tired from the trip. We were on human schedules."
She searched my face and then around me—my aura. "Okay, but … let me know if you need anything. I was thinking, maybe we can go out for a drink. Catch up?"
Nina was a nice girl. Brave to save her sister. Pretty with all that dark curly hair and unusual gray eyes. She had confidence and fire, and as spirit users, we had a lot in common. A year ago, I gladly would have taken up everything she clearly wanted to offer. But now, she didn't stand a chance. No one did.
I patted her hand before gently removing it from my arm. Nina looked down and then through the doorway at Jill, brows furrowing.
"Oh." She pulled away. "I-I didn't realize. I didn't think the rumors were true."
My brows shot up. I glanced at my hand—at the ring—and shared a horrified expression with Jill. "Oh! No. No … This is a healing ring Lissa gave me."
Nina relaxed and chuckled. "Sorry. I didn't believe what people were saying, but for a second, I thought there might have been some truth to it."
"Look, Nina." I had to nip this in the bud but didn't want to hurt her feelings.
She raised her hands. "You don't have to—"
"How about we meet for coffee tomorrow?" I asked at the same time.
She started. "Really?"
"Yeah." I didn't have time at the moment, but I figured it would be best to be honest and give her an explanation since we would be working on the Strigoi vaccine together. I wouldn't tell her everything, of course. I simply didn't want things awkward between us.
"All right," she said, beaming.
I hid a grimace and moved toward Angeline's room. "I'll send you a message on when and where."
"Okay."
I wondered if my smile looked as painful as it felt. It was another first for me, not being able to don a charming grin that used to come as second nature, and I sighed in relief after closing the door. I made it five steps in to the room before I was shoved by a girl for the second time in forty-eight hours, and Angeline exploded.
