People... I'm, again, disappointed.

Let me state it this way. This li'l adventure in Gaia I can make out off the top off mah' noggin. Figuring out how to shaft Hellsing characters in the roles of the Major Arcana without typecasting them is awfully hard. So, now I've got the niiiice reviews each time I spout out the utter nonsense that is On Gunslingers, now I'mma extending my ambition towards Arcana.

Review, please. And be more generous with poor old Arcana. You dinnae know how important it is fer me.

I know I'm taking too long in setting up the scenario. It's because once this gets rolling next chapter, I won't be able to stop at all.

Oh, and following next chapter, this thing's moving to Crossovers. Shoulda have done it a while ago, I know.


Healen Lodge was supposed to be a hospital, if Seras understood correctly.

So she wondered exactly why she was dining something that was tantamount to caviar with silver cutlery.

Granted, it looked a little damaged here and there, but it was silver cutlery.

Rufus Shinra merely cocked his head and asked her:

"Is everything all right, Miss Victoria?"

"Mmm? Oh, yes, mister Shinra. Quite."

"Now, let me just get this straight... this disease, syndrome... how much danger does it pose to the good citizens of Gaia?"

She tried to hide in deeper in her seat, uncomfortably shrugging.

"Very little unless something horrible happened."

"Something like the Nibelheim incident with you and Kadaj, I take it?"

"...yes. Something like that."

Rufus merely nodded in a sagely gesture.

"You'll understand that with two Remnants of Sephiroth now... incapacitated, the third is more than likely to come around and find a way to fight you again. Consider the fact it may be necessary to... erm, how to state this? Alienate, that's the word. Alienate him, permanently, from the Black Lifestream."

"I'm not sure, mister Shinra. I'm already having difficulties dealing with Kadaj and Loz. They... they are hard souls, it's a lot more difficult to draw power from them, you see."

"Quite. I understand they are difficult to handle and I'm not going to pressure you into any sort of confrontation. After all, you are my guest, now. I merely want to reiterate that, excellent at their jobs as my Turks are, even a determined Remnant could triumph over them. With that in mind, I want to give this back to you."

With these words, he gestured for Rude to come into the room and deposit a heavy packet in front of her. Unwrapping it, she found her Jackal, just as she had lost it in Nibelheim.

"A token of my appreciation and that I'm willing to trust you."

"Th-thanks!"

"Oh, and Rude... what happened to our weapon? Did it see use?"

"Not for the moment, sir. Moved here in preparation. WRO transmissions are being monitored and all key installations are on full alert. We're ready to move as you command, sir."

"Excellent. Now, Miss Victoria. I'm afraid I must touch a rather sensitive subject. Can we talk about this woman? What's her name, Rude? Sabbath?"


Deep below, something very much like a heartbeat pulsed across the entire world.

And as that heartbeat continued, images floated around the pulsing liquid.

One of those images was of a neverending meadow covered in flowers. And the occasional tree.

"Did you feel that?"

"Mmm? Whut? Feel what?"

"A shiver. Like the Planet shuddered when Jenova first landed here."

"...You telling me there's a second Jenova running aroung here?"

"It's not a second Jenova. But it could be so many things..."

"Any of those good?"

"Would I be worried if that was the case?"

"Damn. Y'know, it is unfair how much Cloudy boy and everybody out there have to work overtime just to keep us all safe right here. I feel kinda guilty for just lounging around here and not being able to do a damn thing to help him from here."

"We all do what we can. For whatever it's worth. Hoping it's worth it in the end."


Cid, fighting to clear his head after his earlier binge, had left a message on Shera's answering machine and hoped she would believe his best friend had now gone nuts and tried to pursue a woman he had seen melt in his arms across an ocean and half a continent just for a grainy message he might have very well misunderstood. And to top all of that, when asked to explain he merely waved off all objections, referring to the dame in question as the "daughter of the Dragon".

He was going to kill Vincent. Or at least he was going to demand a couple of beers on his tab. And an explanation. Explanations were good.

Meanwhile, he was calling Cloud. Guy deserved to know what was going on.

...rrright after he found exactly how Vincent planned to cross the ocean.


Elsewhere, Vincent was in the hold of a cold, damp carrier heading straight for Junon. Making some quick calculations with his watch, he took out his cell phone, handily retrieved with a bare explanation to Cid, and mentally prepared for a verbal lashing when he called Tifa at what had to be around four o' clock in the morning, standard Edge time.

"Tifa?"

"...Vincent?"

"I have a question. Where was the girl taken?"

"...you know I'm not happy with this, do you?"

"Let me put it this way. That girl has the potential to drink every drop of life this world has ever produced. From Jenova to the Lifestream. And the only things stopping her from doing so are that she has absolutely no reason or desire for doing so yet, something I believe she already amply demonstrated by not siphoning the Lifestream the moment she visited the Nibelheim area. I intend that status quo to remain untouched."

"Before I ask... how do you know about her?"

"Because I met her father. Once. And believe me, neither of us wants somebody so powerful and so insane in Gaia. So I better sort things with her before Sephiroth completes whatever resurrection plan he's thinking about this time and it all blows in our faces."

"Granted. But you were once a Turk as well. Shouldn't you know where she is? "

"Oh, I have my ideas. But you know. And I don't care if the entire Shinra Army is shielding her; I have to meet her at all costs."

"...fine. This one's on your head, Valentine. She's in Healen."


"Sabbath is something I don't quite understand. And quite frankly I'm not totally sure I'd even want to understand her at all. I mean, she's perfectly okay with wanton violence. She doesn't care about anything, if I get her, just... mindless destruction, like it's all it matters. And suffering, of course. From what I heard she said, I mean, she's insane to the degree she would pull out the legs and wings off a dragonfly and leave it to be eaten by ants just to revel in the suffering she's causing."

"...fine. And about the prophecies?"

"Not sure about that either. I have an ability, a third eye, that lets me dispel illusions and see stuff real up close, but I have never heard of a vampire like me having such precognitive powers. Besides - sadist. Wouldn't rule out the possibility she was just yanking your chain."

Rufus nodded as Rude produced a thin leather binder, which he pushed in Seras' direction.

"Good. Now, as a security agent, I want you to examine this data. It's basic information on the biology of Jenova, the Lifestreams, Sephiroth, and Shinra's own dealings. If possible, my team would be delighted to have your personal opinion on how your organizaton would deal with him. Can I be assured of your cooperation?"

"Sure. As long as whatever I say can be shared between all anti-Jenova groups."

"As you say. My primary concern is with the welfare of the world. And incidentally, I know I will probably be rebuffed, but I also want to understand how feasible it would be to use your genetic material as primer against Jenova-based creatures."

"Oh, sure. It could be done, if you don't mind the resulting creations overwhelming the originals and deciding they are much fitter to take over the world."

"...abandoning that line of thought..."


In another continent, a thin man in a leather jumpsuit was asking himself how he was going to reach Edge. Particularly since reaching Rocket Town was impossible with his black sheep brother currrently detached with his friends in Nibelheim, the airship having left Cosmo and nothing else in between.

Screw it all, he was Summoning a monster and see how far it could take him before dying of exhaustion.

It might be even considered a valuable scientific experiment, he snickered. It would make for a suitably morbid joke for his brothers.

But he had little time to lose. With any luck, the monster would be able to take him to the other side of the continent in eight hours.


-And finally, I want to abuse of your kindness once more. I need to know the reaction of your body to a special water we have around here. Sort of a natural defense against Jenova.

Gesturing again, he had Rude serve in a thin, elongated platter a vase of the waters of the church of Sector 5. Somewhat reluctantly, Seras accepted a needle. A small puncture later, the small drop she had produced was dropped into the water.

There were some bubbles at first.

Then the water started boiling, violently.

Hissing, the platter intensely heated up as the liquid on it remained bubbling and steaming.

Moments later, it stopped.

Observing the effects, Rufus and Rude stared at the water. What were once crystal-clear waters of life had been heavily muddied and no longer shone. Rufus covered his face with his palm and had Rude carry out the platter.

"So... I suppose Holy magic would happen to explain that?"

"In strong concentrations, yes..."

"Rude. Please have that water analyzed and tested. See if it's still effective against Jenova cells. And, Miss Victoria, to conclude tonight's little reunion, I need to ask this. Can you please provide me with the name of your employer and the organization you are a part of?"

"That data would be absolutely meaningless. You wouldn't know either."

"Unfortunately that's not for you to decide. So I must insist."

Seras mentally facepalmed.

"All right, then. I serve Sir Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing and her Hellsing Organization."

"Excellent. How do you contact her?"

And Seras was left scrambling for an explanation. She desperately leaped at the chance they might have picked something besides the gun in Nibelheim.

"I had a tracer and communicator with me. I lost it in Nibelheim and haven't seen it since. Perhaps the Turks saw it?"

Rufus raised an eyebrow.

"No. But there are currently several groups of WRO officers in Nibelheim, most likely scrambling to explain your little escapade. Shall I contact them and ask them to retrieve that tracer?"

"If you please. It's a small elongated white thing. It has a series of buttons under the lid."

"Perfect. Then I assume we have finished here for tonight. I offer you for the moment my hospitality."

"Thanks. Much appreciated."


Seras, alone, privately mused how similar Rufus Shinra and Sir Integra were. Both were well-intentioned extremists seeking to better the world in their own way. Though, in hindsight, she would have more likely pressed for more information that Rufus. Then again, he might have had bad experiences when dealing with horribly overpowered enemies he had no immediate way of defeating. Hell, Sir Integra would have pretty much done the exact same things in Rufus' situation. Sighing, she realized she would easily fit the part of the Turks in her own world. That, of course, begat the question of exactly which role her master filled. She dismissed such concerns and tried to sleep and return to the Red Land to check on the new arrival and then finally rest.

And as she closed her eyes, everything changed.

Opening her eyes in the Land, a foot-tapping, arms-crossed Pip greeted her.

"Would it be too much to ask of you to stop sending these psycho clowns this way?"

Seras sweatdropped as Pip moved in to hug her.

"...Sorry. They just keep on coming!"

After a moment of solitude in the immense pillar of the Land, Seras asked:

"How is everybody dealing with the guy?"

"Nobody has the patience to hold him down and explain the rules like we're a group of bloody police officers reading the idiot his rights like we're on a freaking cop movie, Police Girl. So between everybody we repeated that stunt. Y'know, how we dealt with the wolf-octopus-monster things?"

"The Creepers? Sure. Holding him down and pinning him in place?"

"Atta girl. That's the ticket. Gave us a hell of a fight. Between the blackness of earlier (mind you, how did you get killed again, so fast?) and the guy, we were quite close to losing."

"Can I talk to him? And sorry, it's not like I could have avoided getting killed. Well, technically, I could, but... urrr! You-you know what I'm talking about!2

"Yah, yah. I'm just a bastard who likes to play with ya. C'mon, the werewolf's having his fun with those two and he's not leaving any for later."

"Oh! Hey! I just realized, I didn't ask you! How is it that you know when... em.. when I die?"

Pip's visage fell a bit at that question, and he gestured all around him, showing her a wide panorama of the Red Land as they kept walking.

"Everywhere where you look around here is red. Red sky, red ground. We only add a bit of color. But when you die, the redness goes, and it's us alone against a landscape of endless black. Weird and creepy like a nightmare and just as inescapable. And to add to the mindf''ck, there's this background noise of sorts. Nobody knows what it is. Some of us hear flutes, or pipes. Some hear something like a laugh. And we can't move. Or think. Cause the blackness is everywhere. And it... it eats you. We haven't been in there for long, ever, but for whatever God you recognize's sake, don't ever die on purpose. Place is superlative when speaking of cold pain and boredom. Like you eventually want to be eaten just to escape."

Seras stopped for a second, again cursed Alucard for not being able to be there to explain the subtle nuances of vampire life to her.

And she privately swore to find him and lock him in a room until she could get real answers out of him in due time. Hopefully before she had time to get used to it all.

"Got it."


And so, the cargo ship used to ferry across the ocean finally docked in Junon. Dawn was already rising.

Vincent merely stepped out of his place in the hold and proceeded to leave the boat.

Taking out his wallet, he handed the compulsory bribes to the usual people and asked for transport to Healen.