Many Happy Returns

Chapter Nine

A/N: The chapter we've all been waiting for! Evil cackles!

"No." Harry said resolutely, arms crossed over his body tightly, as if protecting himself more than the black Kevlar he was wearing ever could. His eyes were firm and stern, the large scar on his face was even more prominent with the lack of glasses on his face; he almost looked like a stranger.

"Harry, please." Merlin said, rubbing his eyes like he was the most exhausted he'd been in his life. "Do you know what I went through to get these damn authorisation codes?"

"I didn't ask you to do that. You nearly killed us all."

"You did not just say that…"

"Guys, guys." Roxy said bravely, getting between two seasoned Kingsman Agents, and holding her hands up. "This isn't helping."

There was silence for a long moment.

"I don't want to do it." Harry said quietly.

"No one's going to make you, Harry." Percival told him. "We just urge you to consider the…um, the benefits of having your inhibitor chip taken out."

"Like what?"

"Like the fact that we can study it and make sure nothing like this ever happens again. You know, if Valerie Valentine survived, or had other people working on similar things, it's not out of the realm of possibility."

Harry paused in thought for a moment, shock on his face as he considered a reason to have his chip removed that didn't directly involve him and his wellbeing.

Eggsy put his face in his hands without realising that, although Percival may never know Harry in the ways Eggsy knew him, he still knew Harry better than Eggsy did. More than that, he knew battle-minded Harry, he knew how to appeal to his friend's logical side rather than his emotional side.

"I'll think about it." Harry said stiffly.

Percival conceded. "That's all I ask."

"Come on." Merlin said. "I think we all need a drink, and some rest. This is still a victory, Valentine's base has been destroyed and she herself is presumed dead."

All in agreement, they moved to the door of the medical bay to move to the more comfortable part of the Kingsman mansion. Harry, however, perched on the end of the bed and looked at the floor.

"Eggsy, come on." Roxy said quietly.

"I'm gonna stay here for a bit, Rox." He said gently.

Roxy's eyes flickered to Harry and she hesitated for a moment, still uncomfortable with the idea of leaving Eggsy alone with Harry, but after a moment she nodded and hugged him.

"Come up when you're ready." She said.

"Thanks, Rox." Eggsy said, and then she was out the door and gone, and it was just them.

Harry didn't even acknowledge that Eggsy had remained in the medical bay with him until Eggsy crossed the room and stood in front of him, then Harry's gaze lifted and met his. Eggsy was expecting resignation, or even fear but was again met with the nothingness that the inhibitor chip guaranteed. He didn't know why he kept expecting anything else.

"I know you're just going to try and convince me to have the inhibitor chip removed." Harry said, eyes hitting the floor again. "You're wasting your breath. You should go upstairs and enjoy time with your friends."

Your friends.

"They were your friends before they were mine." Eggsy said. "You can have 'em back." He hesitated. "You can have us all back. In, whatever capacity, you…want."

Harry looked at him again and Eggsy felt his cheeks go red.

"There's no point." He finally said.

"Why do you think that?"

"Because I'd be going back to nothing. I have nothing in this world anymore, the last thing I need to do is feel bad about that. I'm just doing the best I can with what I have, you taught me that once."

"Yeah, and you taught me that we can be more than what we are."

Eggsy was almost annoyed, annoyed at the fact that Harry was trashing the life lesson Eggsy had held so dear for so long, the lesson that had given him and his family everything in life.

He forced his anger down and stuck his hand out absurdly. Harry just stared at it.

"Take it." Eggsy said, perhaps more forcefully than he had meant to. But it seemed to force Harry to put his hand in his.

Eggsy gripped his hand and pulled him to his feet, manoeuvring him around to the mirror in the medical bay. Their own reflections stared back at them and the way they were stood so close, with their hands clasped, they looked like they belonged together.

"What is the purpose of this?" Harry asked.

"What do you see?"

Harry rolled his eyes. "Eggsy…"

"Because I see a man with potential." Eggsy rolled on bravely, a smile working its way onto his face. "Someone, who, with the right help, can transform."

"That's not what I said."

"It's close enough." Eggsy said, whirling them so that they were facing each other, but he messed up, they were too close. Eggsy was pressed against Harry, he could smell his musk, feel his warm breath on his lips.

Harry shocked him by pushing him away, by creating a distance between them. It took Eggsy a moment to gather himself.

"What if I didn't?" Harry asked emotionlessly. "What if I chose to stay this way? Would you stay with me? Would you love me?"

Eggsy frowned and backed off a little more, stung by the question and the bluntness in which it was delivered.

"What kind of question is that?" He asked.

"Because, Eggsy, you need to understand that if I have this chip removed…things will never be like they were. I'm never going to be the man I used to be."

"I don't expect you to be, Harry. You never could be."

"So, what' the point, then?"

Eggsy couldn't keep his anger down this time, it overflowed from his stomach and erupted out of his mouth.

"I've fought for you every step of the way." Eggsy exploded, causing Harry to take a surprised jolt back. "If you have any strength left in you, if anything of the man you used to be is left, you'll fight for me. You owe me that."

Harry couldn't feel anything, that part of his brain was cut off from him, leaving him with just the animal side, with his animal feelings and his animal cravings…and all he could think in that moment, despite the raw emotion in the room, was just how hot Eggsy looked.

Without caring about the consequences, Harry surged forwards and grabbed Eggsy's arms. Eggsy began to protest but Harry didn't care. He pulled Eggsy flush against him, his superior strength meaning that Eggsy couldn't move.

Eggsy stopped struggling when he felt Harry pressed against him, their faces centimetres away from each other. Their eyes locked and all of Eggsy's annoyance melted away. He couldn't think of anything except Harry's eyes and Harry's smell and Harry.

"Kiss me." Harry said quietly.

"Why?" Eggsy asked, eyes wide with uncertainty.

"Because I need to know, if getting all that pain back, is worth it."

Eggsy shivered under Harry's touch, he felt like he was on trial suddenly. Like his kiss, his love would be the only thing that would make Harry return to him.

Although he supposed that was always true.

Eggsy tentatively leaned forwards, closing the gap between them and pressed his lips to Harrys. The kiss was chaste and short but Harry pinned him there, biting down on his bottom lip until Eggsy moaned, a raw, guttural sound that came from somewhere deep inside and then he was kissing Harry back, his tongue slipping through Harry's opening lips, finding his and tangling together in a wet, hot heat that was so familiar that it made Eggsy's knees buckle and he fell against Harry, but Harry's strong frame kept him grounded, kept him safe.

It was hard for Eggsy to believe that this was the same man who had tried to kill him, but at the same time, it was hard for him to believe that this was also the same man who made love to him all those months ago, who gave Eggsy everything in the world and promised he'd never leave him. The man who had died trying to save the world.

Harry was right, that wasn't who he was now, that wasn't the man Eggsy could feel beneath his fingertips, whose smell he could smell and whose taste he could taste, but it was so damn close it was painful.

"I love you." Eggsy breathed against Harry's cheek. "No matter who you are or what you do, I could never stop loving you, you bastard."

Harry paused for a moment, aware that such a declaration should have sent him into a frenzy, and it did, somewhere deep in his gut. But not because the man he used to love had just said he loved him still, but because Eggsy had given him the answer he'd been looking for.

That he would remain by his side regardless of whether he chose to rid himself of the inhibitor chip or not. Harry didn't know what he'd done to the poor boy but he'd fallen for him, hard, and so deeply there was no getting out of it again.

"I knew there was a reason I couldn't kill you." Harry murmured.

Eggsy rolled his eyes. "Yeah, way to kill the mood."

"Sorry." Harry said simply, missing the subtle sarcasm as something occurred to him in his damaged brain. Eggsy had given him everything, and he would give him everything for the rest of his life and Harry's brain was screaming at him. Like something was desperate to break free, he wanted to give Eggsy everything, he wanted to give him something, but he couldn't give him anything, not like this.

He wanted to care for him and protect him and…he wanted to love him. But there was only one way he could do that.

He became aware of Eggsy's hand traveling up his body and coming to rest on his cheek, his warm fingers stroking him to get his attention, which Harry freely gave.

The pair stared into each other's eyes for the longest time, having an unspoken conversation before Harry came to his decision, and he knew that, by the way Eggsy was looking at him, that he knew exactly what Harry had decided.

"I'm scared." Harry said quietly.

"I thought you couldn't be scared."

"It's the only way I can think to describe how I'm feeling."

Eggsy smiled minutely up at him. "You don't have to be. I'll be with you every step of the way."

"I know." Harry replied, and he would have smiled if he could. "You always have been."

"I always will."

Harry gently laid down on the operating table, dressed in a white gown and looking oddly vulnerable. With him were Merlin at his computer, ready to reprogram the chip so it wouldn't explode when they tried to remove it, and one of Kingsman's top brain surgeons. His name was Fischer and he was normally stationed in Berlin, but Percival had called him in, letting only the most skilled brain surgeon near his friend on such a delicate and dangerous operation.

Percival stood with Eggsy and Roxy on the other side of the glass partition, peering in to the unfolding scene before them. Eggsy felt like he should have been in there with him, that was what he had promised, after all. Merlin, however, had assured all of them that it would be safer if there were only minimal people in the operating theatre so everyone could concentrate methodically on exactly what they needed to do to pull this off. Eggsy had agreed, but still had his hands pressed against the glass, fighting the urge to press his nose against it, as well. He sent Harry a reassuring smile just as he laid down that he did not return.

Eggsy had butterflies in his stomach, he felt like he was going to puke with how nervous he was. He was nervous, yes, in case any complications arose. He couldn't easily forget that the chip they were planning to remove from Harry's freakin' brain was armed to explode, and while Eggsy trusted Merlin with his life and he had the appropriate codes from Valentine's base, there was always that element of risk, that small chance that things could go very, very wrong. Although, at this point, Eggsy wasn't sure if there was anything Harry couldn't survive.

But he was also nervous because this was the moment he'd been thinking of, constantly, since he'd found out that Harry was still alive. It seemed like a lifetime ago now when, in reality, it had only been a matter of days. But so much had happened in those few days, Eggsy had had his hopes returned and ripped away from him so many times that it made his head spin. But now, now it was actually happening, he actually stood a chance of getting Harry back, of getting his whole life back.

Suddenly, all his months of suffering, of feeling alone and obsessively cleaning Harry's house so he didn't have time to accept that he was really gone, that all dissolved away and all he could hear was the beeping of Harry's heartbeat attached to the monitor.

"There it is." Merlin said, releasing a small metal object covered in crusted blood from a pair of small forceps, it clattered on top of the metal table in another room in the hospital.

Percival peered down at the chip, refusing to touch it in its blood-covered state, and observed it silently for a moment before straightening and smoothing down his suit jacket.

"It's very small." He said.

Eggsy almost smiled, half-expecting him to say something a little less anti-climactic after such a build-up.

"That's the inhibitor chip?" Roxy asked. "That's what was stopping him from feeling anything and acting like a normal human?"

Merlin nodded. "It was connected to his cerebrum, more specifically the limbic system; the part of our brain that has evolved beyond animal and reptilian desires. Cutting it off to create a murdering super soldier is quite clever, actually."

Eggsy stared at him for a moment before he shook his head. "And Harry, is he okay?"

"The chip is armed with a small explosive, similar to the ones in Valentine's neck chips."

The image of the professor and his mystical exploding head flooded Eggsy's mind and he shivered, imagining how easily that could have happened to Harry.

"However," Merlin continued, "the codes I downloaded from Valentine's base have successfully stopped the chip from detonating, and Dr Fischer managed to remove it, quite painlessly."

"So, he's okay?"

"He's fine."

Eggsy breathed a sigh of relief, more audible than he was expecting but he couldn't care less. "Can I see him?" He asked immediately.

For a moment, he thought Merlin was going to say no. He thought he was going to give him some shit about needing to rest and all that, but Merlin seemed to take pity on him instead.

"I don't see why not."

Roxy and Percival, however, seemed to let their own curiosity get the better of them as they snuck in the ICU after Merlin and Eggsy. Harry wasn't attached to anything other than an IV and a heart monitor, that was beeping steadily. He was asleep but looked peaceful and well-rested.

"Is he in a coma or somethin'?" Eggsy asked, worried, as he walked up to his bed.

"He's just sleeping." Merlin said. He paused for a moment, as if trying to figure out how to word his next sentence. "He's had brain surgery, he needs time to recover but he seems fine, but…emotionally, he might be a bit more fragile. He's going to understand and feel everything he's done."

Eggsy's eyes widened in horror. "He's going to remember everything he did with that chip in?"

Merlin nodded sadly.

Eggsy looked down on Harry, so innocent and so unaware of all that was coming when he woke up.

"But…can't we make him forget?" He asked, already knowing the answer.

"I'm sure Harry wouldn't want that."

"No." Eggsy admitted. "He deserves it, though."

No one said anything.

They all remained in the ICU for a long time, Percival had half-heartedly suggested leaving a few times but none of them had ever really considered it. Merlin monitored Harry's condition, Percival and Roxy sat on some plastic chairs against the wall, speaking quietly together in the way only a student and mentor could, and Eggsy had dragged one of the chairs next to the bed and was sat, gently yet absentmindedly stroking Harry's hand, it was a little cold and unresponsive. He remembered the kiss they had shared before, about how he'd convinced Harry to do this, to accept all the pain he'd been blocking out before. He felt guilty. He remembered Harry telling him 'I'm scared', and he hadn't understood why. But now he did.

In a weird way, he'd been getting to know this new Harry, this Harry without feeling or expectation or inhibition, and now he would never see him again. It shocked him that this saddened him ever so slightly.

The thought fell from his mind however as Harry's hand twitch beneath his own, he looked at Harry's face and saw his eyes moving beneath his eyelids.

"Guys." Eggsy said. "He's waking up."

The three other Kingsmen crowded next to him and watched in stunned silence and baited breath as his eyes opened.

Eggsy was immediately greeted with those brown eyes, sparkling with life just as they used to before all of this, and Eggsy thought he was going to cry. He was crying. Tears were streaking down his cheeks as Harry's eyes immediately found his and locked him there, his eyes were large and questioning, full of confusion and emotion.

He took a moment to sit up into a sitting position, hand brushing against his fresh scar slightly.

"We have one or two things to explain to you, Harry." Percival said. "I'm not sure you fully understand how you went from Kentucky to Valerie Valentine's control but we can tell you all that in good time. You've just woken up from invasive brain surgery. Give yourself a minute."

And so he did, Harry sat awkwardly for the best part of ten minutes while Eggsy, Roxy, Merlin and Percival stared at him like his head was blue. He felt queasy.

Eggsy was still clutching his hand but Harry could barely feel it. He could barely feel anything, or, more accurately, he could feel too much. Too much.

"Harry." Eggsy finally said, voice cracking as he slowly brought his hand to Harry's cheek and let it rest there. Harry's hand shot up and he grasped Eggsy's wrist with the same finesse he'd always shown. Eggsy looked shocked but all Harry could see was blood dripping from his mouth from the bullet he'd put in his chest in that abandoned train station. His heart felt like it was going to explode under the pain. It was unlike anything he'd ever felt before, he'd lost friends before, tons, and while he may have been subliminally responsible, he'd never pulled the trigger. Until now.

"What's wrong?" Eggsy asked innocently.

"Harry?" Merlin asked, confused. He wasn't expecting Harry to manhandle Eggsy like that, unless he'd suffered some amnesia from the operation…?

"Stephen." Harry said. "Charlie. They're dead. I killed them."

It took Eggsy less than half a second to figure out who Charlie and Stephen were. Gawain and Tristan.

Before anyone could say anything, Harry ripped the IV from his arm and jumped from the bed, still only clad in his hospital gown.

"No, Harry, you must get back into bed…" Percival tried, attempting to put a hand on his shoulder but, as with Eggsy, Harry batted the contact away.

"Don't touch me!" He all but shouted. "Don't come near me, I'm dangerous. I'm a fucking monster."

Before Percival could even begin to protest, Harry had raced from the room, the door banging behind him.

"Harry!" Eggsy called out, shoving the bed out of his way to get to the door and follow him.

Roxy shot her hand out and snagged him by the collar, causing him to stumble.

He stared back at her.

"Give him a minute." She said reproachfully.

Eggsy stayed planted to the floor where he stood, breathing heavily, he met Merlin's and Percival's eyes and they all seemed to be thinking exactly the same thing.

What have we done?