Chapter 9

"I see you got your pot off just in time for shooting practice tomorrow," Four acknowledged as he stood at the head of our dinner table. I was the only one to look up, as the three J's just couldn't tear themselves away from their food.

"Yeah, it's still bandaged, and hurts a bit, but I'm sure I'll cope, I look forward to it," I smiled softly, my voice hoarse from the afternoons tears.

"The weapons don't have too much of a kickback, so it should be fine, but know you won't get special treatment or point allowances for an injury tomorrow," Four said sternly. I nodded that I understood.

"Four," a voice beaming with authority addressed the young man. My head ducked, and I became suddenly became very interested in the contents of my plate. Even among all the rowdy noise of the dauntless dining hall, I could hear his footsteps halt beside me. Why did I sit on the end? Jayne nudged me hard in the ribs as she glanced up from her plate through her long eyelashes.

"Ow," I whispered under my breath, shooting her daggers.

"They need you in the control room, something about factionless on the outer perimeter of the compound," Eric said, although it sounded more like a command.

"Right," Four nodded, stalking off. I gave into my inner demons and glanced up at the figure looming over me. Except I was slightly let down to see he wasn't looking at me, or even in my direction. He left without a word, or a glance.

"What was that about?" Jed asked, still unaware of the afternoon's events.

"It doesn't matter, eat your food," Jayne commanded, staring him down. Her eyes wondering after Eric. She had a certain control over the two boys that I couldn't, and wouldn't ever understand.

"I just want to die," I said into my cake.

"Don't be stupid," Jayne replied, "At least you have your arm back,"

"Yay," I cheered sarcastically. A conversation on the night's antics popped up, and that's when I zoned out. I lifted my head up slowly, searching around the room for the tall brute, but he wasn't there. As much as I wanted to kill him, I needed to talk to him more, and I knew I shouldn't have run away like I did. It wasn't brave, it wasn't dauntless.

After dinner everyone went to the dormitory to get ready for tonight's visit to digital, a visit I had opted out of. And so I wondered the pit looking at all the other forms of entertainment dauntless had to offer.

"Hey redhead, how about a change of style?" A girl with a bright green Mohawk shouted from the salon, I shook my head no and carried on. I would never get rid of my copper tresses; they were a part of me. A little further a long neon signs caught my attention. A tattoo parlour. I stopped for a moment to stare before carrying on. But then something in the back of my mind made me go back.

As I stepped into the shop a women with dark hair approached me, obviously an employee.

"Hi I'm Tori, what can I do for ya?" She asked casually, her hands placed firmily on her hips.

"I don't know, can I browse for a second?" I asked quietly, rubbing my bandages. They were kind of itchy.

"Sure thing, just come see me when you're ready,"

The tribal patterns weren't for me, nor where the skulls, crossbones and other classic dauntless styles. I actually found it kind of hard to pick something that felt 'me'.

"Hey Eric," Tori greeted over the loud music. I froze instantly. "Here to get your back piece finished?" I hid behind a stand of tattoo designs, praying to god he wouldn't see me. Not that he would even acknowledge me if he did. He grunted in reply.

"Okay take a seat, get ready, I'll be with you in a second," I began to search for the exit, my only means of escape. I began to tiptoe to the door when Tori blew my entire cover.

"You decided on anything yet?" She asked, pulling some out from a cupboard. Eric turned around as he took his shirt off, revealing his chiselled chest and abs. Oh lord. My cheeks lit up bright red instantly; they were practically the same colour as my hair. He balled his t-shirt up in his hands as he stared.

"Um no, I'm going to think about it, thanks anyways," I said awkwardly, giving her a little wave. Why the hell did I wave? I got out of there as fast as I could without looking like a complete moron. As soon as I was out of sight I leant against the nearest wall. I felt utterly sick, and my eyes began to water. But I promised myself I would not cry, especially not here where everyone could see me.

"You know that girl?" Tori asked Eric as she took a seat behind him. He leant forward into the chair, ready for her to finish off his most recent addition to his body art.

"She's an initiate," He said simply as Tori began to wipe down his skin.

"Ah that explains the way she fled, you still scaring the initiates half to death now a days?" Tori asked with a stifled laugh.

"Something like that,"

"Doesn't explain her lobster face, think she fancies you," Tori half joked. Eric thought about it for a second. But he never replied.

"Where did you get to?" Jayne asked on her way out of the dormitory. She had bought a new dress, red and skin tight with a black lace overlay, and it looked really lovely on her.

"Nowhere, just had a proper look around the shops," I said, trying to be casual.

"Don't lie to me farm girl," Jayne narrowed her eyes, "You're way more chilled than usual,"

"That's only because I'm freaking out in side," I admitted, cringing.

"Tell me,"

"Jayne we'll meet you in digital," Jed said, as he and Jason began their stroll down to the pit.

"Okay, I'll just be a second!" She shouted down the hall. "Now spill,"

"I went to the tattoo shop-" I started, but was abruptly interrupted.

"You got a tattoo?" She asked suddenly, spinning me around, "Let's see!"

"No I didn't,"

"So you're freaking out over a tattoo you didn't get?"

"No I was in the shop, and you know who walks in?" I asked dramatically.

"Eric," She guessed with a smirk on her face.

"Yes, exactly," I said, face palming myself.

"Still don't see your problem, yeah he kissed you, but he's going to be in training with us everyday. And then he's going to be our leader for I don't even know how long, you're going to have to get over this hunny," Jayne said, taking my hands in hers. Sometimes she reminded me of my mum, and I loved that about her.

"That wasn't the worst bit," I couldn't help but stifle a laugh, and smile at this next part. "When I saw him, and he saw me, he was completely shirtless," I bit my lip. Jayne's eyes nearly popped out of her head.

"Scale of one to ten, how hot was he?" She asked.

"Definitely an eleven," I admitted, I wanted to kill myself for that.

"I knew it!" She squealed. "I've been dying to see under that shirt for days now, and you, Mrs 'don't kiss me' get's to see it first? So unfair," She admitted, annoyance playing on her words.

"You fancy Eric?" I asked, bewildered, and slightly annoyed myself. Why hadn't she said something? What about Jed?

"Who doesn't? He's got the body of a god, I was a little jealous when you said he kissed you, but since you didn't like it, or like him for the matter I thought you wouldn't mind," She said softly. "You don't mind do you?" I couldn't find the words, so I made some up.

"Of course not, I definitely don't like him," I said, my voice quivering. "What about Jed?" I asked.

"Jed was a bit of fun, he's cute and all, but he's no Eric,"

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I asked, slightly shocked.

"I thought there was something going on between you, he always looked at you, talked to you, asked you to stay behind, he even took you to the infirmary when you broke your arm," Yeah, when I broke it. "So I didn't want to get in the way," I nodded my head, just to stop her from talking. My gut felt like it was going to come up threw my throat and straight onto the floor. "We're cool yeah?"

"Yeah," I smiled.

"Great, I'll see you tomorrow morning then," She said with a smile, before sauntering off down the hall. My stomach was still doing flips. I just wanted to call it a day, hop into bed and go to sleep. A part of me wanted to never ever wake up from this nightmare. A sudden urge to join my friends in Digital pulsed in the back of my head. Eric will be there my brain whispered. Exactly my heart said. In Amity we are taught to follow our hearts, but in this case my heart was an idiot.

"Clem," A voice interrupted my train of thought.

"Gabriel, hi," I said awkwardly as he stepped out of the dorm. "What's up?"

"Just wanted to say thanks for coming to see me," He said, uncharacteristically.

"No problem, I see that you're better,"

"You too," He said, pointing to my arm.

"Yeah, it is, I'm just going to head to bed now, enjoy your night," I smiled, stepping inside.

"You're going to stay here alone?" He asked, screwing up his face in disbelief.

"I'm tired," I lied.

"Come down to Digital," He proposed. "I know we didn't get off on the right foot, I was an ass because you were Amity, and I thought I could put you down for that, but you've proved your more than dauntless, you kicked my ass," He laughed. You may call me stupid, but I was convinced.

"Okay," I said, giving in. "Could you wait outside while I change?" I asked politely. He nodded and took his leave. This was turning out to be another rollercoaster day.

"You look nice," Gabriel said as we strolled down to the club.

"Thanks," I said unnerved.

"You don't have to worry, I'm not being weird, I just want to be your friend, because in all honesty, Chris and Aiden aren't going to make it, and if I do, I need to make sure I have someone who doesn't hate my guts,"

"Anymore," I added. He was puzzled. "Someone who doesn't hate your guts anymore," I elaborated.

Once we arrived we made our way over to the bar, it was the same pierced and tattooed man again why was I surprised?

"Beer?" Gabriel asked.

"Not for me," I said sternly. "I'll have something sweet please," I addressed the bar tender, he nodded.

"And a beer for me pal," Gabriel added. "Where are your friends?" Gabriel asked, scanning the dance floor.

"Where are yours?" I challenged.

"Probably passed out on the floor somewhere, that's how they ended up the other night apparently, I wouldn't know I was in the infirmary," He shot me a joking look.

"I'm sorry; I really didn't mean to, you just made me so angry,"

"It's alright you're forgiven, but don't think I'll go easy on you next time,"

"Likewise,"

"Clem!" A couple of voices called in unison. Jason and Jed. Jed stumbled over, obviously already on his third or fourth. He really couldn't hold their drink.

"What are you doing with him?" Jason asked, poking Gabriel in the chest.

"He convinced me to come down here," I admitted, sipping the pink drink the bartender slid across to me. It was much better than beer. "Where's Jayne?" I asked, looking around for her.

"She went to the ladies," Jason said after a long pause. Jed's face screwed up with distaste.

"The little bitch," Jed muttered under his breath.

"I'll go find her, let you guys bond or whatever," I said pulling away.

"You don't want to do that," Jason said suddenly, tugging on my wrist.

"Why not?" I asked suddenly. Jason glanced around before pulling me away from the group.

"As much as you and Jayne think you have your secrets, I'm not an idiot, I can work things out," Jason whispered in my ear, he was only just audible above the banging music.

"What are you getting at?" I asked, that sick feeling crawling it's way back into my tummy.

"Just trust me when I say you don't want to go looking for Jayne, she's not a very good friend, even if you did say it was alright," What was alright? My heart began to race and my hands began to get sweaty. I looked around quickly for the toilets, and made a dash for them before Jason could stop me.

"Don't do it Clem!" He called after me.

"What's going on?" Gabriel asked as he watched me stalk off.

"Girl drama," Jason sighed.

"Jayne's a bitch," Jed shouted, half slurred.

"That pretty much covers it,"

I weaved through the crowd over to the neon symbols that represented a girl and boy, and pushed through the door. A long corridor stood before me, filled with passionate couples. My heart suddenly found another speed to pump at. I tiptoed down the hall way slowly, searching for my friend. The search was over when I found her leant against the wall, passionately swapping saliva with Eric.