My infinite apologies for the delay in uploading. My university has been really laying on the work thickly. Plus I think I need to organise my time a little better. Yes, that would be useful. Anyway here you are I hope you enjoy. Feel free to let me know what you think of it. I'm all up for constructive criticism and praise makes my head bigger so either way I'll enjoy a review.
Thank you to all reviewers and favouriters and followers of this fic. You're collectively the reason that the earth goes round.
Disclaimer: And Moses said to the Israelites, "Thou shalt not kill," and the Israelites were all like "Yeah okay then. That makes sense, I guess." Moses continued, "Thou shalt not steal," and once again the Israelites didn't think it was that shitty of an idea. Moses did a double take on the tablet in his hands and hesitated slightly before saying, "Thou shalt not believe that MT Linshaw owns Harry Potter when everyone knows JK Rowling does." The Israelites looked to one another in confusion. "Well yeah, duh!" They said.
Chapter 8: You Left Severus' Robe here.
"Alright," Remus said, smiling slightly, "you can come."
Remus waited patiently by the front door of number 12 Grimmauld Place as Arthur went to inform Molly that he leaving for a couple of hours and that he would return later. There was a spider, Remus noticed, hanging down from the ceiling. A money spider. It hung rather nonchalantly from its web in mid-air and seemed only to move the bear minimum amount necessary. It was an easy life for a spider, Remus decided. For that was all they had to do – hang from their own web. Remus felt slightly jealous for a moment, before deciding that he had finally lost his mind.
Just then Harry came and joined him in the hallway. Remus smiled at him and as the boy smiled back. Remus noticed with remonstration the bags under his eyes, the cracks on his lips and the added paleness of his skin. The stress that the boy was under was very much beginning to show and that worried him greatly. The boy was not even yet 14 for Merlin's sake, he did not deserve to live in such a dangerous world.
"I heard you had a run in with some dementors." Remus said. Harry nodded,
"They attacked me and my cousin. If I hadn't have produced the patronus charm they would have sucked out our souls."
"You did well to produce that charm. I never for one moment doubted my decision to teach it to you. You did the right thing." Remus smiled at the son of his best friends, "I'm proud of you."
Harry smiled back and walked closer to Remus, "It's been great seeing you again. We were- I was so worried that…"
"It's ok, Harry" Remus replied, shaking Harry's hand.
The two made to say their goodbyes only to be interrupted by the abrupt sounding of Arthur's re-entrance into the hallway, holding a black bundle in his hands.
"You left Severus' robe here," Arthur said with his back to the pair as he closed the kitchen door to ensure that nobody from inside it could hear them. Remus closed his eyes and strongly wished that Arthur had turned to look around to him before talking.
"I would have told you earlier," Arthur continued, unaware of the additional presence of Harry, "but with all the hustle and bustle, it would seem that I-" Remus reopened his eyes to see Arthur's own widen at the sight of Harry, "-forgot."
"It was Snape." Harry said in a tone of half question and half statement. He looked confused. Almost as if he didn't quite believe what he'd heard. Remus nodded hesitantly and held in his breath. Fucking Hell, Harry didn't need to know this. It was a bloody understatement to say that Harry had enough to deal with at the moment, but it was true. Now there was just one more thing to add to the list. And Harry would want to know everything, naturally. And he'd blame himself.
Sirius was going to kill him when he found out that Harry knew. Of course, Remus understood that he hadn't been the one to actually tell Harry about Severus but it would fall onto him, of course it would. And Severus. Severus would kill him too. There's no way on earth he'd want Harry Potter of all people to know about his "weaknesses". His strength had been dwindled greatly and yet it was a certainty that he would do his very best to find a way to make Remus pay, oh that he would. Remus pinched the bridge of his nose at the thought of it all.
"I'm so sorry." Arthur said quietly. "I thought you were still in the kitchen with the others."
Harry did not answer Arthur's question. Instead he slowly turned back to Remus, "Snape- Professor Snape: Is he still alive?"
Remus nodded in affirmation once more before realising belatedly that he should talk properly to the boy and use words. He slowly started to retell the story of Severus' attack, being careful not to inform him that it had taken place outside of his aunt and uncle's house. Harry would absolutely flip if he discovered that. Harry was completely blameless in Severus' attack, Remus knew and so did Severus and so did everyone else who was aware of the situation. And yet without a doubt Harry would find a new place to store this one more pile of guilt. He'd find a new hippogriff to hang from his shoulders.
He told Harry of the probability that it had been an attack by Death Eaters due to its nature and brutality and the fact that Severus was well trusted by all members of the Order of the Phoenix through Dumbledore's trusting of him. He told him about their discovery that the knife had been lined with a dark potion which affected his heart, omitting the more gruesome details, of course. And he informed him of Severus' current "recuperation" in a Muggle hospital.
"Wait," Harry interrupted, "why is he in a Muggle Hospital and not a magical one?"
"The closest one is St. Mungo's," Answered Arthur, "the risk of Severus being captured or harmed further by whoever has attacked him would be multiplied by his being treated there."
Harry looked to the side, deep in thought and Remus found himself inanely looking forward to getting back to the hospital and being able to get a few hours' of sleep. The wear always seemed to catch up with him suddenly and never gradually.
"How did it happen, like what was he doing?" Harry asked.
"That's Order business, I'm afraid, Harry." Remus replied, perhaps too quickly. He hadn't wanted to allow himself time to panic and say something stupid. But Harry didn't seem to buy it. His gaze was suspicious and scrutinising. Remus used all of his will to return the gaze unblinkingly. Suddenly though Harry turned to Arthur.
"Was it because of me, Mr Weasley?" Harry asked him. Arthur stalled for a moment, wide eyed. He looked to Remus and back to Harry and swallowed.
"Death Eaters are cruel, Harry. I'm sure they don't need much of a reason to attempt to kill people." Arthur replied.
"And I doubt Severus will want us discussing his private life in full behind his back." Remus added, moving towards the door and beckoning for Arthur to do likewise. "Please don't worry about it, Harry. Severus will make a full recovery before you're back at Hogwarts," Remus continued, ignoring his conscience as it berated him for lying. At the moment the chance of Severus' full recovery were not even likely to be 50%.
"You're hiding something from me." Harry said, his voice rising and his cheeks flushing in anger.
"No I'm not," Remus replied.
"Yes you are. You're being evasive. I'm not a kid. It's my war as much as anyone else's and I don't understand why you're all going to so much trouble to hide things from me."
"No one is hiding anything from you." Remus replied, slightly concerned about Harry's ride in anger.
Suddenly the kitchen door opened slightly and two ginger heads in the form of the two youngest Weasleys came into sight. Remus sighed. This was beginning to get out of control. Remus hated things being out of his control and yet it seemed that everything was currently out of his control.
"You alright, Harry?" Ron asked his friend, taking in the emotional hallway display. Harry turned but before he could give an answer, Arthur replied in his stead.
"Harry's fine we're just having a chat. Go and help your mother, both of you."
The siblings voiced their protestations loudly and Arthur raised his voice in an uncharacteristic show of anger and frustration, "GO AND HELP YOUR MOTHER!"
At that the children hurriedly re-entered the kitchen, closing the door behind them and the three were left once again alone to their conversation.
"Why won't you tell me where it happened?" Harry asked Remus once the door was shut.
"I told you, some things that happen within the Order of the Phoenix are not to be discussed with others." Remus replied.
"And yet you told me everything else about Snape's attack. Don't you trust me?"
"Of course we trust you, Harry," said Arthur, "it's just nothing for you to worry yourself over."
"If it's nothing for me to worry about then you should just be able to tell me."
Remus pinched the bridge of his nose. He was really tired now. It took all of his will power not to take his frustrations out on Harry. The boy was very good, Remus had to admit, at turning people's words against them. That was a useful skill. Annoying when one was standing on the receiving end of it naturally, but useful to possess nonetheless. This was a fight he was not going to win, Remus knew it.
"He was attacked near to the house of your aunt and uncle in Surrey. Since You-Know-Who came back the Order has been ensuring that you are watched by someone constantly. That night happened to be my and Severus' night." Harry's eyes widened in shock and Remus continued, trying to keep everyone as calm as he possibly could, "It was not your fault, I assure you. It was an attack purely against Severus and he wouldn't care for you to spend your time worrying over it or him."
Harry lips moved almost unnoticeably as he contemplated what Remus had just told him. It was a very difficult situation for everyone involved, Remus knew. And he was not at all certain that he had done the right thing in telling Harry, but there was nothing else that could have been done, the boy was not stupid.
"I'd like to see him," Harry said decisively, breaking Remus' trail of thought. Remus swallowed uncertainly,
"You'd like to see him?" he repeated
"Yes, he was almost killed outside of my house, so I'd very much like to see him."
Arthur stepped forward and put his hand on Harry shoulder, "I doubt that would be the most sensible course of action, Harry" he said.
"And why not?" Harry replied, his voice once again rising in anger as he shook away Arthur's hand, "I wouldn't stay for long, I just want to – I don't know. Say thank you, maybe."
Remus grimaced as he contemplated for a second Harry's demand. He couldn't in his right mind allow it to happen. Severus was in no fit state whatsoever to be getting angry. So far it had not taken much at all for his heart to decide that it didn't want to work anymore. And while Remus was not certain that Harry visiting him would be I any way detrimental to his wellbeing it certainly would not be very helpful. Furthermore, Remus was not sure how Harry would take seeing his professor in such a vulnerable position. No, it would not be beneficial to any involved parties, that much was true.
"I can't allow it, Harry I'm sorry. Severus isn't well enough for so much commotion."
Harry reddened at that and Remus hoped he'd understand. He didn't want to hurt his feelings, he loved Harry as much as Sirius did. He was too young.
"Please, Remus," Harry persisted, quieter now, "I thought he hated me. I said some really bad things about him. I didn't know." He said and Remus thought he could see tears forming in his eyes.
"Surely it wouldn't hurt for a few minutes," Arthur said, "It might be good for them both. We're all fighting the same war."
Remus was conflicted. Life never seemed to be a simple case of yes or no anymore. Decisions were harder to form than a patronus charm.
"Five minutes." Remus said finally after a few moments of contemplation. "You'll have five minutes and then Sirius will bring you back home, is that clear?" And Harry nodded solemnly and gave him his thanks.
A few moments later the three of them were standing in the nearby alleyway of the hospital with Harry and Arthur looking around them, taking in their new surroundings, and Remus feeling a little worse than worse for wear. He shouldn't have apparated all of them at once. It had done nothing to steady his already slightly diminished health, it was a small wonder that he'd got none of them splinched. Good God he could hardly conceal his excitement at the prospect of getting some sleep in the near future; it was almost all that he could think about as he tentatively led the two towards the hospital.
"It would be best now to let you know that Severus does not look his normal billowing self at the moment for obvious reasons." Remus said as he led them through the hospital, although who of the two he was addressing, he was not entirely sure. But it was best that they were prepared for his weakened appearance.
Neither of them said anything in response to him as they walked through the entrance of the hospital and along its many corridors. Remus found himself surprised at how well acquainted with this Muggle hospital he had become in the past few days. By now it was practically his home. How long had they been here, he wondered. Three days? Four? It was most likely something around that area, he supposed. He could not remember, exactly. One day seemed to just blur into another.
Before long they were standing right outside of Severus' room, at the doors and Remus told Arthur and Harry to wait outside while he went in and told Severus and Sirius of their presence ahead of them, as to attempt to lessen the element of surprise it would surely otherwise bring.
Remus took a deep breath as he slowly opened the door and entered the room. Sirius had his eyes closed and his shoulders were shaking in silent laughter. Remus was slightly taken aback to see that Severus, whose torso was now uncovered for reasons unbeknownst to Remus, was doing much the same.
"Why is it," Remus asked with a slight smile, "that every time I enter the room, you two seem to be in the midst of some sort of joke?"
The two men only now seemed to notice that Remus had entered the room and they ended their laughter with some chokes. Sirius shrugged, "We both had some wonderful stories about Minerva McGonigall," he said simply.
Remus smiled. At least they hadn't killed each other during his absence. That would have been unfortunate. Especially with Harry and Arthur waiting outside. He walked over to the hospital bed and sat unceremoniously in the plastic chair next to it.
"You have a couple of visitors, Severus," Remus said slowly.
Severus turned to him and narrowed his eyes slightly. "I know," he said with a low, hoarse voice, "you're both right here." It took Remus a couple of seconds of weary confusion before he understood Severus' meaning.
"Oh no," Remus said, "two more visitors."
Severus' eyes remained in the slightly narrowed state, giving him the appearance that he might have needed some glasses.
"Who?"
"Arthur Weasley," Remus started, nervously looking back from Severus to Sirius, who looked deeply interested in Severus' sudden new found popularity, "And Harry."
Severus' facial expression did not alter as he asked, "Potter?"
Nope, Houdini Remus answered in his mind, before nodding silently. It would not do to tickle a dragon with deadpan sarcasm even if it was bedridden. Severus' facial expression still did not change. Remus began to worry that his mother had been right when he was a child and that the wind had changed when Severus had first made his narrowed eyed facial expression, and that now he was stuck with it for the rest of his life. He would be forced to spend the rest of his days a squinting mess. Sirius did however grant Remus with a response.
"Why is Harry here? You told him?" he asked, somewhat calmly.
"He overheard Arthur mentioning Severus. I didn't particularly want to inform him" Remus replied.
"Why has… he come?" Severus asked, pausing briefly to move himself up on the bed painfully.
"He just wanted to see you." Answered Remus. He didn't believe he should tell him that Harry wanted to thank him. That would be best done by Harry himself. Severus' nostrils flared slightly, the plastic breathing tube shuddering.
"To see what I've been reduced to?" He asked, clearly struggling to keep his temper down.
"To make sure you're okay!" Remus replied, hoping to calm the man soon. It would not do to have his temper flying here there and everywhere.
Severus said nothing in response. He was obviously not happy about the situation. Remus wasn't either in all honesty, but here they were. Sirius went out through the doors to go and get Harry and Arthur, and Remus leaned in closer to Severus.
"Harry was upset to hear that you'd been attacked, Severus." Remus said, looking into his eyes, "Do not think that he wants to gloat."
Severus returned Remus' gaze and nodded the smallest of nods. He understood that at least. Remus placed his hand on Severus' arm to find it so burning hot that he almost wanted to pull his hand away again. So that was he wasn't wearing his hospital robe.
"How long have you been feeling so hot?"
Severus leaned his head back against the pillows and stared at the ceiling.
"I don't know," he said, "it's hard to keep… track of time. A few hours perhaps."
At that moment Sirius re-entered the room with Harry and Arthur in tow. Arthur smiled kindly in Severus' direction and was returned with a stoic and almost imperceptible nod. Harry, Remus had never seen look more nervous. He didn't seem to know where to look.
Sirius went and sat back down in his plastic chair and Arthur followed him to Severus' bedside. He folded the robe that had been left at Grimmauld Place over the end of the bed, not that anyone particularly noticed, before bending over and placing his hand on Severus' shoulder, ignoring the heat that it most probably gave off. Once again, he smiled jovially.
"How are you, Severus?" Arthur asked.
"I've been better." Severus responded.
"That I can well imagine." Arthur said with a small laugh. As the two descended into a very one-sided conversation about the inner workings of Muggle Medicine and the fascinating articles that Arthur had read about it, Remus turned his gaze to Harry who was doing his very best to prevent his eyes from wandering toward the Dark Mark which appeared so boldly and brightly on Severus' left forearm. Or at least he did his very best to not allow anyone to notice that he was staring at it.
Severus at some point did seem to notice, though and to Harry's horror, when his eyes left the darkened blemish they instead found Severus' very own. For a heart wrenching couple of seconds Harry's and Severus' eye-contact did not abate and Remus found himself worrying that Hell might break loose. Luckily before long Severus broke the eye contact to once again painfully move himself up onto his pillows.
"Potter," he said with a weaker voice than he'd most likely intended, "Lupin says… you wanted to see me."
Harry hesitated, blushing slightly,
Yes, Professor," he said after a moment, "And I- I wanted to thank you."
There you go. Once again very sorry for the delay.
