Daryl stood at Beth's stove, stirring the pot of noodles for the dinner he was making her. He'd showed up early and Beth had been on the phone, all the food pulled out onto the counter for what she was going to make, and he'd watched her for all of a minute as she struggled to fill the pot and listen to the person on the phone. He'd gently taken the pot from her, shooing her with the wave of a hand, and smirked as she stepped away with a grateful smile on her lips. He'd filled up the pot, placed it on the burner and set about inspecting the ingredients to figure out what she was making.

It hadn't taken a genius to see she wanted to make spaghetti so he set the burner to its highest setting and went about making the sauce. Truth be told, he had no idea what he was doing, he usually just used the stuff in the jar, but Beth had everything already out so he figured he couldn't really screw it up too badly.

That was how he found himself standing over a pot with noodles boiling away, and meat and tomato sauce simmering away. Finally, he heard the conversation ending and sensed, more than saw, her walk up beside him. She was looking down at the food a big bright smile on her face like he'd done the most amazing thing in the world by throwing all the ingredients together and tossing noodles into some hot water. "Thank you Daryl. You didn't have to cook dinner. I'da done it." He shrugged one shoulder, offering a grunt at her.

"'S no big deal. Just kind of tossed everything together." He looked at her. "Everythin' alright? That sounded kinda important." Her cheeks reddened and she nodded.
"Yeah. It was important, but everything is alright." She said softly. He looked at her, squinting his eyes like he was trying to figure out a riddle or something before turning back to the noodles.

"Think these're done." She nodded and moved to drain the noodles. He watched her. He knew she wanted to talk to him, but he wasn't going to push.

Beth drained the noodles, before tossing them back into the pot and bringing the pot back to the burner. She poured the sauce over the noodles and stirred until everything was combined. She paused and looked up to him, wide eyed, like she'd just realized she'd done something very very wrong. "I'm sorry. I didn't even think…I always mix my noodles and sauce together. That way you know whether you've got enough sauce for all the noodles. Is…" He gave a snort and could stop the short burst of a laugh that tumbled from his lips.

"Don't even finish that question." He grinned at her softly as he cheeks turned red. "It's all gonna get mixed up anyway. This is fine." She nodded and turned back to the pot, mixing a few more times before pulling down some bowls. She spooned the spaghetti into the bowls and handed him one. The sat quietly at her little kitchen island, the clinking of forks the only sound in the room. He watched her. It was one of his favorite things to do. He could tell she was warring with herself and loved to watch the little faces she made. Suddenly her eyes came to his and she held his stare. He felt the tips of his ears burn red at being caught staring, but before he could look away, she was biting her lip, looking like she wanted to say something. "You ain't gotta tell me what you're thinking about telling me, if its gonna make you this uncomfortable." He rumbled out. She heaved a sigh.

"Is it that obvious I wanna say something?" He just looked at her and she smiled. "Fine." She looked down at her empty bowl, like it was suddenly the most interesting thing ever. "You done?" She piped before hopping off her chair. He gave her a grunt and watched as she snatched his bowl and moved to place both of them in the sink. She didn't even turn around. "So, I was thinking of going back to school in the fall." Her voice was nervous and he couldn't for the life of him figure out why. "I'm only a couple semesters away from getting my degree, and I figure…now is as good a time as any." She peeked at him over her shoulder. "What do you think?"

His eyes moved over her back, settling on the side of her face that was turned towards him, her eyes not looking at him. He knew she was still paying attention to him, waiting patiently for his answer, and honestly he didn't know what to say. He didn't understand why she was so worried about bringing this up. He'd never stand in the way of something she wanted to do, and couldn't understand anyone that would. "I think you gotta do what'll make you happy" He rasped out. "Ain't no reason to let your dreams get away." She turned to look at him.

"Really?"

"You on somethin' girl?" His eyebrows rose on his forehead. "Have you ever heard me say somethin' I didn't really mean?" She smiled at him.

"No…I guess I haven't." She flipped on the tap and filled the bowls with water. She bit her lip. "Would-would you look at some of the brochures with me?" She shut off the tap and turned to look at him. He shrugged his shoulders, offering a small nod.

"Sure, if you want. I don't know much about colleges though." He placed his hands on the island and leaned forward, propping himself up on his elbows. She opened a drawer and pulled out some of the brochures and pamphlets and sat down next to him.

"I just want to talk to someone about it. I mean, we're friends, right? Who better to share with than a friend." She smiled and looked back at the stack of glossy papers, completely missing his scowl. Friends? Friends? Is that what they were? Flashes of hot skin sliding against his, sexy moans filling the air around him, the feeling of her lips on his skin, her nails biting into the skin on his shoulders flashed in his mind's eye. Those were not things shared between friends. He definitely didn't think they were friends…or at least…not just friends. Is that what she thought they were? Is that all she wanted from him? To be friends, with the occasional romp between the sheets? His gut tightened. That wasn't what he wanted. He enjoyed spending time with her. Any time with her. Not just the times that they had sex, but the times they actually watched movies, and ate dinner, and spent time together. He shoved the thought away, determined to examine what he was feeling when he was alone, away from her intoxicating presence where he could really think about what he wanted. No use in getting wrapped up in feelings when he wasn't quite sure what he wanted. Right now, he was going to listen to talk about colleges she was interested in, because she was excited and he wanted to be supportive of something she was excited about.

She pulled out a bright pamphlet, that read Georgia State University, and he felt his stomach lurch. This school was in Atlanta, and while Atlanta wasn't super far away, it was definitely far enough away that she'd be gone more often than not (if she didn't just up and move there.) He forced a tight smile, battling his uncomfortable emotions as he listened to her list off why she was leaning more towards this college, and what program she would be taking and 'Oh Daryl…look at this. I'd be able to transfer classes I've already taken into this new catalogue…' He gave a few nods and some non-committal grunts before she moved on to a couple other smaller colleges and a couple community colleges. He bit his tongue to keep from suggesting she just go to the community college that was twenty minutes away in the neighboring city. She'd be close enough that he could continue to be able to see her almost every day like they were now. He swallowed the words that sprang to his lips about what the driving time to most of the colleges in Atlanta would do to their time together. He swallowed it all and felt himself hide behind a wall inside him.

Beth felt it too. With each new pamphlet, and each babbled sentence, Beth felt him close himself off a little more and she didn't know what to do. She could tell he wasn't upset with her per say, and she could tell he really was excited about her going back to college and getting her degree, but she could still feel a yawning distance between them, that she didn't know what to do. She stacked the pamphlets and slid them away. "I'm still thinking about it, and nothing is decided yet." She said awkwardly as she fidgeted next to him. "What do you think?" She saw him swallow and then take a deep breath before turning a soft smile to her.

"I think which ever school you choose will be lucky to get you." He was sincere. This was something she wanted to do and he was damned if he'd stand in her way. She deserved to be happy and to fulfill her dreams. Her eyes moved over him, studying every inch of his face, as if looking for the lie or the feelings he had buried and hidden away inside of him. Slowly, inch by inch she leaned forward her lips touching his in a feather light caress. She pulled back, just far enough to meet his eyes.

"I don't think you realize…exactly how much I needed to hear that." He gave her a small grin and that made everything better. The distance was gone. The wall he'd hidden himself behind was gone, and she just wanted to beam at him. She moved to stand next to him, he assumed to put the pamphlets back in the drawer she'd gotten them from, but he didn't want her to move. His hand snaked out, and landed on her hip, pulling her close to him as he rested his forehead on hers.

"I mean it, Beth. Whatever school you pick will be lucky to have you. And you'll do good, be good, where ever you decide to go too." He felt her place her hands on his chest before they slid up and wrapped around his shoulders. His other hand came around her and settled delicately between her shoulder blades, fingers splayed, and pressing her close to him. Daryl was surprised to find that there was no urgency when they touched, this time, like there normally was. He didn't have a roaring need to strip her down and touch every inch of her like he'd never been with a woman before. In fact, he was overcome with a sense of contentment. Just holding her was enough. He didn't want to let her go. Not to let her put the pamphlets away, not to go sit together on the couch, not to have her go off to college and forget him. He wanted to stay, wrapped in that moment with her for as long as he could, because suddenly, it felt like he was seeing the end in the distance, and even though he knew it was coming (had always known really) it was still going to hurt like a bitch.

~~~

Daryl rolled over in his bed, staring into the darkness of his room. It was late in the night, or early in the morning, (however you wanted to look at it) and he was most likely not going to be able to sleep tonight. The idea of Beth going to school was bothering him. No, that wasn't strictly true. He wanted her to go to school, but he knew that if she did, and if she chose one of those schools in Atlanta, she was going to move. There was no way she was going to commute that far every day, and even if she did. She'd leave early in the morning, spend the day at school, drive home in the evening and still have homework and shit to do. She wouldn't have time for him. Not to mention, there would be many guys her own age at school. She could have her pick of the litter, and he knew that. She'd go to school, spend all her time with some boy and would fall for him without even meaning to. He didn't fit into the equation of her life, and he knew he never really had, but it didn't stop the sick sinking feeling he got in his stomach when he pictured life without spending time with her, without being with her. His life without her smile, her laugh, her warmth, would go back to the way it had been, and Daryl didn't want that. He'd become someone. He'd become a better person with her, and he didn't want to go back to what he was before her.

He snorted at himself. He was thinking like he was something to her. She'd called him her friend right? Was he her friends? He was more of a friend than he had been to start with, but he was more than a friend. Wasn't he? Did he want her to think of him as more than a friend? A resounding 'yes' sounded in his head and he knew he was sunk. He didn't want to be just her friend. He didn't want whatever they had to stay this nameless state of limbo where he didn't know what to call her, or if he truly had a right to be upset at the thought of being left behind. He wanted Beth Greene, and he wanted her to want him too.