"Friends are those rare people who ask how we are, and then wait to hear the answer."
― Ed Cunningham
One of the things Kagome truly loved about Sango was her patient understanding. She was sure that if she ever had an older sister, she would be exactly like the demon slayer. Despite the fact that her friend was obviously bursting at the seams with curiosity, she remained quiet until the young miko began to rant.
"Oh... One minute InuYasha can be so kind then the next he's a big mouth brute. I swear he likes the punishment." Kagome huffed as she disrobed and wrapped a towel around her curvy frame.
Sango giggled softly in response, "He must have spent too much time in Miroku's presence. Those men are so thick skulled and for some reason they keep coming back for more..."
"Men…" The miko sighed before shaking her loose ebony locks and walking into the small hot spring.
The taijiya followed suit finding a small boulder to prop herself up on before letting out a sigh of relief.
"So... It seems as if it it's been forever since we last had a moment to speak privately, Kagome."
"I know... So much has happened I don't know where to begin."
"Well... Before we get to the current state of affairs... Are you okay? You seem preoccupied of late."
Kagome's expression became contemplative and just a bit sad as she spoke, "I've been thinking about life a lot. And love..."
"And InuYasha..." Sango prompted.
"Yes..." The miko continued hesitantly, "Sango... Do InuYasha and I look like we're in love? Be honest."
"From the outside looking in, I would say you two have solid and true connection. I can tell that he truly cares about your well being."
"That doesn't sound romantic to me." Kagome replied petulantly before sliding down in the water until her mouth and nose were submerged.
Sango continued, "Trying times like these don't really inspire romance, you know."
When Kagome emerged her inky tresses clung to her heated flesh. "Well... Be honest. If you didn't know any better, would you even think we were dating?"
Her companion paused before carefully wording her reply, "I would think your affection for each other obvious but..."
"There's no fire. We're like lukewarm, bland soup. I don't see the fiery passion he felt for Kikyo."
Sango rebutted, "Well you see how that ended... twice."
"Even so... You could tell how InuYasha truly felt. Almost nothing would stand between him and Kikyo. Not even me..."
"Oh Kagome..."
The young woman laughed humorlessly before she continued, "Don't feel bad for me... I knew what I was signing up for then... At least I thought I knew. But now, I know deep inside that even if I stay by his side he will forever be searching for her in me. It's like a knife in the chest."
Sango replied, "I don't think InuYasha would do that. He cares about you truly."
"He has Sango, unconsciously. It's not something he can help. I look like her. We shared a soul and a fate... How could I not remind him every time he sees me? Just look at me!"
The taijiya quickly opened her mouth to deny her friend's claims but words escaped her in that moment. Time had wrought so much change in the young woman. Gone were her cherubic features and the adolescent chubbiness from living a life of leisure. She was stronger now than when she first met Sango. Endless traveling and fighting numerous foes had shaped her body to that of a fighter. Kagome was still much curvier than her willowy counterpart but the dips and hollows of her body had firmed and toned. The young priestess' heavy ebony tresses had grown to waist length waves that she more often than not restrained in a ponytail. In truth, the young woman bore a resemblance to her predecessor. However, her coloring was much livelier than Kikyo's and her striking blue eyes were wide and filled with innocence.
It was the solemn air about the usually cheerful priestess that truly made her likeness to Kikyo more pronounced. InuYasha's former lover would always conduct herself with dignity but there was always an aura of sadness and resignation as if she already knew she would never outrun her fate.
Sango sighed, "Kagome... He knows the difference. You have to believe that."
"My head knows that... But I can't shake the feeling that I will always be 2nd best. I just keep wondering about my position in his life and if there is really a place for me here when this is all over… Or will I be forcing myself into the spot that Kikyo was supposed to hold."
The two young women fell silent. The demon slayer witnessed her fair share of tragedy and hardships. She could understand her friend's insecurities because she too had wondered if Miroku's feelings were genuine once upon a time. While the monk never seemed to claim an attachment with any woman besides her, his carefree flirtatiousness often masked his true emotions.
"I can understand your doubts. I have felt them myself. There is so much that is unspoken between Houshi-sama and I. I know that he fears promising me a future that neither of us can guarantee."
"The difference between you and I is that while Miroku may flirt, we both know it's mostly for show. He is devoted to you and you know it. There isn't some shade of a past lover holding him back."
Leaning her elbows on a smooth, hot spring warmed boulder for leverage the taijiya propped herself up onto the hard surface. She pondered the profile of her friend who remained submerged in the steamy waters.
"All I can say is to give it time… "
"I don't know… I think it is about time I followed my instincts and faced the facts. InuYasha loves me in his own way but his feelings are not the same as mine. We are friends… We will always be that no matter what but there is a distance between us… a gap that I can never cross. I guess I've always known but once upon a time I thought my love would be enough… It's been three years and he still keeps me at arm's length."
A pregnant silence fell upon the women, each lost in their collective thoughts.
"Well it seems that you've made a decision Kagome. I will always support you in whatever you decide."
The pensive young miko's face brightened a bit as she smiled in response, "And that is what makes you a true friend."
Having decided that it was time for a shift in the conversation, "Speaking of decisions, what made you speak with Sesshoumaru?"
Kagome groaned in shame. "Sheer madness... It was easily one of the stupidest ideas ever."
"Well... Perhaps..."
"No Sango. Don't sugar coat it for me. I was a total idiot for thinking I could get anything through that thick skull."
The taijiya fell silent for she knew that her troubled friend would divulge the details at her own pace.
"I was just so damn sick of all the childish bickering and fighting everyday between him and InuYasha. I figured if Sesshoumaru acknowledged me enough to speak to me about merging our group then perhaps he would hear me out."
"Did he?" Sango prodded.
"Absolutely not. In fact, I probably single-handedly undid our alliance…"
Kagome's brown haired companion instantly became alert when she heard her friend confess this tidbit of information.
"Kagome…" Sango asked slowly, "What did you do?"
Turning away, the miko visibly winced before responding in a strangled voice, "Hypothetically speaking… I just might have insulted Lord 'I'm Better Than You' and sort of purified him when he retaliated it."
Kagome peeked at her friend only to find the young demon slayer's mouth agape with her brown eyes wide with alarm.
"I swear I didn't mean to. It just happened. All of a sudden he pushed me against a tree and he had his hand around my throat and I zapped him. I was sure that it was the end. "
Sango gasped in shock, "Good Gods Kagome! What in the Seven Hells would have possessed you to do that? It's a miracle you're still alive."
The blue-eyed young woman wailed in response, "I know… I screwed up royally. InuYasha knows that I talked to Sesshoumaru but he doesn't know the details. Now who knows what that damn youkai will do when he returns. He might decide to finish the job he started. InuYasha's brother isn't really known for his merciful soul."
"I'm just surprised he didn't exact his revenge then and there…" the taijiya mused.
"He reached for me again and I freaked out and zapped him again. But the second time… The look on his face… "
The young miko reflected briefly on the daiyoukai's curious expression after being touched by her purification powers during their encounter. He had seemed almost surprised that her reiki had any effect on him at all. It seemed like he forced her second response just to see if it was fluke.
"I'm not sure what to think… He just walked off and left me in the middle of the forest afterwards. He didn't even give me a backward glance. I don't know what I'm supposed to do now."
"Well... At least you're alive and that's a plus in your favor."
"Right... Some consolation prize that is... What if he decided that he wants to melt me into compost later? Ugh! Why do I have so much bad luck with dog demons?"
"There is so much you don't know about youkai. Especially alpha males like Sesshoumaru-sama. If he truly wanted you dead he would not hesitate to cut you down."
The young woman considered Sango's statement for a moment before responding, "But he has tried before."
"You've seen what happens to his adversaries when he truly wants them dead..."
Kagome shuddered at the memories of watching the Western Lord in battle. The name "Killing Perfection" suited him too well.
"Well then why would he..." The young woman questioned as her slim hand fluttered to the shallow cut at her throat.
"Alpha males do not take well to being challenged by those he considers inferior or by anyone who questions his authority in general. It's possible that by not backing down from his threat you may have gained some of his respect."
"Pfft..." Kagome snorted in derision. "Respect from Sesshoumaru? I doubt it. He won't even use my name."
"InuYasha, Miroku and I will protect you no matter what but you should take care with your dealings with that one if you wish this alliance to work."
"I got us all into this mess... I was just trying to sort it all out."
"Don't think that way. If your choice was something we really couldn't abide, we would have advised against the merge."
The miko seemed to consider this as she began to wash her dark mane. Sango took her cue and followed suit. Then the conversation between the two young women shifted to a lighter vein.
Even though Kagome giggled as they traded humorous secrets, her mind still continue to ponder what would happen what the daiyoukai returned.
"There's no point of wracking my brain about it now," she sighed inwardly even as she laughed at some humorous quip from Sango. "Whatever will be, will be."
The two women returned to camp after completing their bathing ritual. The young miko always felt better after spending private time with Sango. Her friend always seemed to know just what to say to put her ease or how to listen to the tangle of her thoughts without judging. Those little interludes where they could just be two teenage girls trading secrets and laughing helped keep the futuristic girl from going insane.
Kagome scanned her surroundings when she returned to camp. Somehow she was not surprised to find the daiyoukai had not resumed his place at the edge of camp.
"I suppose he will return whenever he sees fit and not a minute before," she thought and then a frown darkened her expression. "Knowing his highness... he'll make his grand reentrance when it's the most inconvenient."
Giving her head a decisive shake, she mumbled, "No more thinking of Sesshoumaru."
Rehashing that evening's events only served to frazzle her nerves once again so she resolutely marched over to her bedroll and climbed inside.
"Tomorrow is another day... What will be will be..."
Those last thoughts drifted through her mind before the exhaustion she'd been holding at bay finally overtook her body
***Another chapter in the bag! Yay!***
