Thanks for the reviews and comments! Hope you are enjoying the ride! This chapter is full of heartache for Roman, you will see why he is the way he is….
"I can't do this anymore Robert. After I caught you in bed with Jason, that was it for me. You literally broke my heart after years of being faithful to you and loving you like you should have been. But apparently I wasn't enough!" Roman said as he sobbed while packing his suitcase. He has enough. He came home to surprise his fiancée of 3 years and lover and friend for 5 years. Their anniversary was in a couple of days and he wanted to surprise Robert with plans to go to Japan for a week of romance and adventure. Imagine his shock when he came home early from work to plan the perfect evening for his surprise. There, in their bedroom, naked and sweaty, was Robert fucking Jason and both scrambled when they saw Roman standing there in the doorway with a heartbreaking look of both anger and hurt.
"Babe-" Robert attempted to say as he got off Jason and wrapped himself with a towel that was nearby.
"No…don't" Roman said as he put his hand up to stop him from coming closer. "I don't want to hear it. I'm done…" he says calmly, "and as for you Jason, you are dead to me as of right now. I don't want to ever see or hear from you again as long as I live," he turned away, leaving Robert standing there guilty as Jason laid on the bed, afraid to move, fighting back the tears that were threatening to fall at the loss of his best friend.
Roman was standing there looking out at the evening sky with his cloth on while Dean sat on the makeshift bed. He was worried about Roman after their lovemaking. Someone broke his heart and he didn't like that.
"Talk to me Roman….please…" he whispered, afraid that any loud noise would shatter Roman more than he was already.
Roman sighs as he closes his eyes for a moment. A single tear fell as he remembers that fateful day. A memory he blocked for so many years. A man that he deeply loved with all his heart, shattered by a moment of weakness with his best friend.
He opens his eyes back up and continues to look out in front of him, but he does speak.
"His name was Robert. We met at a zoo ironically. I was there with my best friend Jason and was looking at the elephants when I saw the most beautiful man hosing down one of them. He was magnificent as hell. He has short brown hair, muscular in all the right places, and was tanned from head to toe. I was enchanted right then and there. Jason nudged me to go talk to him, but I was as shy as child seeing Santa for the first time. All I could do was just stare at him. After he was done, he turned around and saw me and Jason and smiled that million dollar smile," Roman sadly smiled at that faint memory of their first meeting. "I was hooked that quickly. Jason knew it so he went over and talked to him to tell him that I had a crush on him. I could have killed him for that…" he chuckles as he closes his eyes again for a bit. "But I was glad he did though. Robert came up to me and introduced himself to me and talked for the next hour. Jason left me with Robert to look at some other animals while I chatted with him about the animals I loved as well as him."
He blows out a sigh as he opens them up again, but not moving. "He asked me out to dinner that night after work and I giggly agreed. I was so excited that the man I just met and had a crush on that quick asked me out on a date, but he did and we were inseparable after that. I mean, we did everything together. He even got me a job there at the zoo attending sick animals since I wanted to be a vetarnian. I was getting ready to start college of my second year in a couple of months, so this was a dream job for me to get started."
Roman gently wiped the tears away as Dean sat there and listened. He knew how hard this was for him but he wanted to know so Roman started the story. But it didn't mean that his heart wasn't breaking a bit from the pain Roman went through. But he sat there, not moving until he was ready.
"We dated for two years before he proposed to me. It was beautiful and so unexpected. He took me on vacation to Africa on a safari to look at rhinos and tigers. We started out early that morning with the guide. Robert was acting funny, but I chalked it up as excitement since he never been here as well as me and wanted to make this trip good for the both of us. So, we get up, had breakfast, got dressed and packed up for the day. We met our guide and off we went on a four hour safari trip."
Roman then turned around and walked to the chair and sat down. Dean could tell this was painful for him to talk about, so he spoke up.
"Roman, you don't have to continue. If this is too painful for you to talk about, we can stop and talk about something else, I am sorry for bringing up memories that is making you sad. Not my intention." Dean mumbles as he looked down, not wanting to see the sad look on Roman's face as he talked about something that hurt him so much. He isn't sure if his own heart could take the heartbreak that Roman went through with a man he obvious fell so deep in love with.
Roman chuckles sadly at Dean. Yes, it is painful, but he's held this in for so long that somehow, he needed to get this out of his mind and heart. To relinish the hold that had his heart had for so long. "It's okay Dean, I need to talk about it to let the hurt finally go. While it is hard to talk about, it's needed."
Dean looks up slowly and sees the sincerity in his eyes as he nods.
"About Two hours into the safari, we stopped on one of our first breaks after seeing the rhinos and the antelopes play in the water with each other. The guide pulled over to this one little oasis that was about 30 feet from the road that was surrounded by beautiful flowers and trees. Robert smiles as he grabbed both my hand and the lunch basket he packed earlier that morning. He took me to the spot he picked out there that had a bit of privacy. We made love and ate by the water. It was serene. Peaceful. Quiet. Just felt like we were the only two in the world at that moment. After we got dressed and packed to get going, Robert got down on one knee and proposed to me, right then and there."
Dean could see Roman smiling at the moment. He could see the happiness for such a split moment. Dean knew the smile was one of Roman's best features, with the dimples showing and the glow surrounding it. Best that was only for a moment…..
"Not gonna lie, I cried tears of joy when he did that. I pulled him up and cried as I said yes. I was so happy at that point because I was marrying the man I was truly in love with. He slipped this beautiful black hills gold band on my finger and promised me forever. I was on cloud nine after that. I just couldn't wait to be married to the man of my dreams. And to have our dream jobs and house waiting for us. I was in my final year of college and was set to graduate in a month after we got back, so I felt like everything was in place. We went back to the jeep with our guide, who had the biggest smile on his face and offered his congrats to us. We both kissed and loved on each other for the rest of the trip. I felt like nothing was gonna go wrong. I had everything I ever wanted. As long as I had Robert, I knew everything else would just fall into place. I was happy."
Dean noticed that Roman demeanor changed a moment later. He didn't know whether he should get up and go over and comfort him or just stay there. It was a tough choice. But he felt that he needed to stay where he is at until he knew he was needed.
"Two years later, my world crashed." He said in a calm, but angry voice. Dean knew that he wasn't over what happened to him. But how could he be? But he listened.
"I came home early from work. Robert had the day off from his office. He was part owner of the zoo where we first met after being there for almost 10 years. His dedication was never questioned. I ended up owning my own animal hospital that catered to animals from all over the world. Any time I heard of an animal that may not make it, I went and got that animal, regardless of where they were at. So I traveled a lot. But I always found time with Robert. Always."
Roman then clears his throat and got up and walked back over to the makeshift window. He folded his arms over his chest, as if he was waiting for someone to hold him. But still, Dean didn't move, he couldn't.
"Anyways, I came home from work early. It was a couple of days before our fifth anniversary as a couple. I bought two plane tickets to Japan for a week. I booked one of the best hotels in Tokyo. I even planned some of the adventures they had there, including a two day excursion through some remote places to see some exotic animals. It took me two months to plan all this out, right down to the restaurants and bars they had. I mean, I wanted this trip to be the trip of a lifetime. I planned for us to get married in an old monastery they had there. I even hired a monk to perform a traditional Japanese ceremony."
Damn…. Dean thought, Did his heart broke more than it already did. Roman was a true romantic at heart that you don't find anymore. He really did believe in true love ever after.
"I walked up the stairs and headed to our bedroom. There….on OUR bed….was Robert fucking Jason….." and that is what broke Roman down. He sobbed as Dean, who went wide eyed at what Roman just said, scrambled off the bed and over behind Roman. He put his arms around Roman's waist as Roman fought the tears that kept coming. His heart broke, shattered at what Roman just confessed. No wonder he got angry at Dean wanting to leave. He really felt truly broken at what happened.
Roman sniffed as Dean hugged him from behind, as he laid his head on Roman's back, trying to console him in some way.
"Robert and Jason both saw me standing there with this angry and hurtful look on my face. Robert scambling to get his towel on as Jason covers himself while looking so guilty. Robert proceeded to walk over to me and try and explain. I told him we were basically through and that I was done. I packed my shit. Robert, who finally put on some shorts, tries to talk to me. Tells me that it was a mistake. I told him that is as a mistake that his dick mistakenly fell into Jason's ass? I mean, I asked him what the fuck did I do to deserve that kind of shit from him. We never fought. We never even really argued. We always talked when things didn't feel right. We worked so hard at communication because it was the number one key to a successful relationship. We never hid things from each other, or so I thought. I truly thought we were always honest. I was completely faithful. Never waivered because I believed in true and honest love."
"Oh my God Roman….I am so sorry…." Dean breathed as he held Roman tighter.
"He finally told me that him and Jason had been fucking each other for two months…TWO FUCKING MONTHS behind my back and I never fucking knew it. They both covered it very well. He told me he felt that the sex between us wasn't as exciting as it was in the beginning and he wanted to find someone more…adventurous in bed. He never even told me he felt that way. I always thought our sex life was great. We never were afraid to try something new to keep it exciting. But I guess it wasn't enough for him to stay faithful."
"But why Jason?" Dean asked carefully.
"He told me that him and Jason saw each other at the bar down the street from our house on one of my out of town trips. They both started drinking and talking about life. Jason was dating some guy named Terry, been for about two years at the point. Nice guy, very tech savvy like him. So they hit it off, or so I thought."
"What happened?"
Roman signs as he slowly rubs Dean's arms across his chest. "I guess Jason and Terry broke up that day and he needed a friend. Since I wasn't home for another few days, he called Robert to see if he wanted to hang out. So Robert said yes and met him at the bar….needlesstosay, that was the first time they fucked in the house. Apparently Jason likes rough sex and Robert loved giving it to him."
"You don't care for rough sex?" he asked as his slowly started kissing the back of his neck, making Roman hitched a bit before Dean stopped for a moment.
"I like rough sex, I like to experiment new things as long as its safe to where no one got seriously hurt. But it wasn't enough for Robert to keep it in his pants and for Jason to stay away."
Roman then turned around in Dean's arms to look at Dean. "I was so in love with him that when I found then two together, it literally broke me. My heart never truly healed from that…..until I saw you and rescued you."
Dean gulps as he asked another question. "Did you see them again after you left?"
Roman gently glides his thumb down Dean's face, "I did, Robert told me he got the ring I sent back to him which tore at him and well, Jason felt so guilty for what he did to me, that he left the state and moved somewhere on the west coast. But that was before they tried to date each other for a month. Neither made it work as the memories of me seeing them together proved to much for them to continued. So not only did I lose my finacee, but I also lost my best friend. After that, I vowed to closed off my heart because I didn't want to ever feel this pain again. Then I got a boat a few months later and this is where I ended up. In a way, I feel it was God's blessing for me to start over from scratch. So I did just want I was suppose to do.
Dean swallows as Roman kept stroking his face with the tears wanting to fall. He never thought that Roman would have ever felt this. All this hurt and anger from his last relationship literally closed him off….until him.
Roman leans his forehead to Dean's as Dean puts his hand on the back of Roman's head and closed his eyes. He was in a true dilemma with this. One the one hand, he wants to go home, but on the other hand, he doesn't want to leave Roman either.
"I'm sorry Dean for acting the way I have. I honestly didn't think I would ever feel this again. But I am not gonna keep you here either." He said softly as he holds Dean a bit tighter. "Just know that you will always have a piece of my heart. You made me feel things I haven't felt in a long time and I thank you for that. So, please, whatever you decide, I will support you on it."
Dean squeezes his eyes shut as Roman places his lips onto his. He responds back with just as much passion. Both him and Roman head back to the bed as they rediscover their touches with each other's bodies.
And the decision Dean has to make just got harder.
And we leave it at that….hope you like this chapter! Next chapter will be just as intense, but from Dean's side. Let me know what you think!
