Back on track, thank you to the reviews I have received, especially from Medusa750-- don't get mad for me using your name please, I am very grateful as you have made me feel like I don't totally suck.
If only;
Chapter nine/ 'Fake Dreams'
Rated; T/ L
(Fry's POV)
"Okay, Leela." I sighed as I got up off the couch, I looked back at her still a little bitter. I exited the Planet Express building and made my way down the street, down to the Robot Arms. I don't get what her problem is. Why she has to be so damn critical of everything. Then she wonders why she's lonely.
She's lonely because she's critical. Nothing is good enough for Leela, no man is good enough for Leela. I take a breath, What did she mean? 'What about what Bender said?'. What about it? So Bender loved me, at least someone loved me, she sure as hell was never gonna love me. I look around, it doesn't seem that odd. Really I should have known.
I guess I should be more creeped out, my best friend, who is a guy... errr, manbot, loved me, who is a guy, who is human. I still can't get past the fact that I don't have him anymore, to hell with his sexual preferences. I've always accepted Bender and his obsessions before, why stop now?
'But his obsession was me.'
Hum, I oddly feel comfort at that thought. 'Bender loved... me.'
Wow! Someone loves me. I know Bender was anti-human/robot dating, but Bender says a lot of shit he doesn't follow through with. He wanted the human race dead too. But when he had the human race gone as said before, he came and got us back.
I think back to that day, watching as the cables pulled the planet sized being through the anomaly. The robot brigade dressed as pirates began their mission destroying heaven. I begged Bender to stop.
But Bender looked only at me as he told me to shut up he was rescuing me. I told him to go home, he looked at me sadly, "But I did this whole pirate themed attack for you."
He did a good job of letting everyone know it was the whole human race, and I suppose the majority of that statement is correct, but looking back it's as if he did it just for me.
A warm feeling washes over me, 'He did it for me.'
'He took a space pirate ship and raided heaven to bring me back, yes yes, the rest of humanity as well, but he picked just me up in a net. He wasn't about to let me stay. He didn't care about Colleen as he left her ass behind. It was... romantic?'
I shouldn't smile, but I can't help it. I approach the apartments and made my way to what used to be mine and Bender's room... err, still mine and Bender's room, I haven't gave up hope yet.
I enter the room, I can still smell the metallic odor Bender left behind, it's oddly comforting. I look around that thought of that day on Yivo still fresh in my mind.
Bender attacked heaven for me. Wow, someone done something romantic for me.
My mind wonders back to Leela, I have done tons of stuff to prove to her how much I love her. Stuff that sounded as if it came out of a cheesy sci-fi romance novel. Did it matter?
No, 'I wasn't important enough', I huffed and sat down. Once I rest I'll grab the kit and start back to P.E. headquarters, then we can fly to the Orbitting Meadows and dig up Bender.
Leela isn't a bad person, just sometimes she makes me feel like an idiot. I know I'm an idiot, but it hurts when someone you love thinks so. I mean I've died for this woman, I found her parents for her when all hope of her ever having them seemed all but lost.
'I wasn't important enough', the thought echoing in my head like a shot from a gun. Leaving a tear like a bullet. A wound I've bled through too long.
I hang my head and a thought occurred 'I am important to someone. I have done everything for Leela including risk life and limb, and yes she has saved my worthless ass a hundred times, but did she ever attack heaven to get me back? Well, she was up there too, but if she had not been, would she ever dare such a feat?' A smile crosses my lips.
'Yes, she would, but only because she's such a great friend. Not because she loves me. Bender.. Bender loves me.'
I flush red at the thought, confused a little as to why it feels so soothing, so comforting. I don't know how to descibe this feeling. 'Do I? Could I? But I'm not gay...am I? I don't like looking at other men. But this wasn't really a question when I was with Yivo. I mean I'm still not sure what Yivo was. Shklee said shklee had no gender. But I didn't much care, it was more than that. Then Leela presents us with this whole Yivo is mating with us crap. Genticles.'
I snicker, it's funny, but even after that I still didn't care. 'I mean come on, Yivo was a guy. And that didn't matter, I loved Yivo, I wanted to spend my life with.. him. I guess love has no gender.'
'Could I love Bender?' My heart races wildly, I'm not sure I like the answer I want to respond with. But when I lost him, I felt like a part of myself died with him. Like I was never gonna be complete or whole again. Bender filled what was missing in me since I came to the future, something I didn't know I needed.
Something I didn't know I'd miss till it was jerked away from me in such a horrible manor. Bender had gave his life to be human to be with me.
I look at the picture of him on the wall, it was his mug shot, he thought he'd frame it and put it up. I wipe a tear from my eye. 'Could I ever feel that way about him?' Strangely enough I believe I always have. I was just too stupid to see it till it was too late. 'No, it's not too late, I'm gonna have him back.'
I grab the robbery kit and headed for the Planet Express.
--xx--
Amy had arrived while I was gone, she was in the lab helping the Professor. Zoidberg was on hand in case there were any accidents to be had. That was a scarier thought than to picture an accident happening-- Zoidberg to the rescue. Me and Leela loaded in the ship and headed for the graveyard. I was assured the machine would be finished upon our return.
Leela sat silently behind the wheel, she knew I was angry with her. But really I've calmed down.
"Fry?" She broke the awkward silence, "Look, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been a jerk to you. I really am grateful for all you've done for me. I treasure our friendship to no end. I don't see my life without you in it. But it's not fair to you and it isn't fair to me. We're not meant to be. It just won't work out. For it to work both parties need to be happy."
I sat listening to her, "Leela, you don't have to feel bad. You can't make your heart love someone when it doesn't. I drother you be honest with me. It's not fair, but it's why I still want you as a friend."
"I'm so glad to hear that, Fry. I'm sorry, I've been a selfish bitch. And I don't pity you because of your brain thing, or because I think you're stupid. You are who you are and that's why I like you. If I though you were a jerk, I wouldn't hang out with you." She confessed. It made me feel better.
"Thanks, Leela." I smiled.
"I don't want this to tarnish our friendship." She replied.
"Me neither, I'll always love you, Leela." I added in response.
"I know, and I'll always be grateful." She smiled.
"So, what do you, umm.. think about what Bender said? You know, before he died?" It's kinda hard to bring it up.
"Well, I don't think it's all too strange. I mean he was very close to you. You're the only person he was protective of. I mean he wanted to give up being a robot for you." She replied.
"You don't think less of him do you? I mean he.. Bender.. the robot who wanted to be the epitome of robomasculinity, was in love with a human male."
Leela looked at me puzzled.
"Wow, Fry, you expressed that so... Look, I think it's sweet, I don't think it makes Bender less of a manbot. I think it makes him more of one for what he done, and for admitting that to you. I mean it has been incredible what he's done. Attacking heaven... and he died for you. You're the only man whose done anything for me. All the others did was lie to get in my pants. Any living creature male or female, or other gender would kill to have someone love them like that." Leela sounded very thoughtful.
"Leela, would you think less of me, if maybe I loved him back?" I asked surprised I sounded calm.
"Fry, I'm not here to judge you. Besides anything is less disturbing than you sleeping with your own grandma. But, you need to be happy. If this works, and I hope it does for your sake, then you need to tell him how you feel." She suggested.
"So you don't find it weird?" I raised an eye to her.
"Fry, I'm a one-eyed cyclops with mutant parents." She joked, then got back serious. "These days a lot is weird, there is nothing strange about two guys, robot or human, being together."
"You don't think we're gay do you?" I ask playing with my zipper.
"Fry, let me ask you something. Do you still find women attractive?" She asked.
"Yeah, of course." I replied.
"Okay, do you find men attractive at all, Bender excluded." She smiled, but not to make fun.
"No, not really." I replied truthful.
"Well, congratulations, you are not gay." She reassured.
"Really, but what about Bender?" I asked.
"Fry, Bender is not technically a guy, he's a robot. And besides, Yivo was a guy." She answered.
"So, I am gay." I put my head in my hands.
"I'm sorry, Fry, that came out wrong. Yivo wasn't even human, he was something way different. And plus you connected with him before you knew what he was. You loved him inspite of what he was. I believe what you feel for Bender is the same reaction. You connect with him, he connects with you. In any case you both love and need one another and it shouldn't matter what you are. If you became a hermaphrodite, like via one of Professors experiments.."
I had an uneasy look on my face, she saw this.
"..I'm not saying that will ever happen, but if it did, I know Bender would still love you. He loves you, Fry, because of who you are. It doesn't make him gay. It doesn't make you gay. You two fit, like a glove or something." She finished.
"So, you wouldn't oppose it?" I ask, her opinion matters and she knows this.
"Fry, I'd be happy for you. I like Bender a hell of a lot better than I liked Michelle or that slutty skank Colleen." She smirked. I giggle at the statement.
"You really would be okay?"
"I'd kick anyone's ass who wasn't okay with it." She said. I smiled.
"Thanks, Leela. I'm glad we're still friends." I said.
"Me too, Fry, me too." She smiled.
Heart warming. XD. Awe, I like Fry and Leela as friends :) Review, my darlings, see you next chapter.
